Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight

Chapter 1: College

Nessie's POV

I was not quite sure how I felt once I got off of the plane. Excited? Nervous? Sad? I couldn't really tell to be honest.

Maybe I'm just that screwed up that I can't even identify my own emotions. Then again my whole life has been screwed up.

My name is Renesmee Carlie Cullen. I'm half human and half vampire. Odd right? My father is a vampire and my mother is a human. Well was a human. She's dead now and it's all my fault. My mother had died giving birth to me so it must be my fault that she's dead. It angers my father when he hears me blame myself for her death, he much rather take the blame himself. But I know the truth. It's my fault and my fault alone. I'm nothing but a monster. An abomination that shouldn't even exist.

If there is one thing I've always been certain of is that my family would rather have my mother then me. I know my dad regrets having sex with my mother while she was still human. If he would've waited until she had been turned I would have never been conceived and I would have never accidentally killed my mother at birth.

My father denies all of this. He loves me. Deep down though I know I'm the cause of my family's pain. That's why I chose to leave them after seven years. At least for now. My family home schooled me for the first three years of my life. Then when I was three years old I insisted on going to high school. By that age I looked fourteen years old and my accelerated growth rate had slowed down to the point where I would not be noticed by humans.

When senior year finally rolled around I applied to as many colleges as far away as I possibly could. Throughout my high school years I managed to keep myself as busy possible. I joined sports, clubs, and even got a job. Anything that would occupy my time and keep me away from home and my family.

I couldn't stand the looks of absolute sadness and heartbreak when they looked at me. They lookeded at me and thought of my mother. I didn't even know much about my mother. Not even her name. My dad refused to talk to me about her. My grandparents, aunts, and uncles wouldn't defy my father's wishes. So all I really had was the memory of that one time I saw her before she died. She was in a lot of pain. That much was obvious. Yet somehow she still managed to smile at me despite what I had done to her. She loved me even though I killed her. I didn't even have a picture of her. My family got rid of them. I think it was because they didn't want any physical reminders of my mother. I was the only proof that she ever existed in the first place.

Here I am now barely seven years later going off to college. I got accepted into several universities but I chose New York University. Finally, somewhere where it did not rain 99.9% of the time.

After using the bathroom I went for my luggage and then headed outside to look for a taxi that would take me to the school. Despite how busy John F Kennedy airport was I managed to get the attention of a taxi driver right away.

The school was certainly huge. That was my first thought when I got there. It took me some time to find the main office and when I got there there was a wait. Several other people around my age, well my supposed age anyway, were sitting there waiting their turn.

Some of the girls instantly threw me jealous looks. I sighed and tried not to let it bother me. One aspect of freaky half vampire genes was inhuman beauty. I did my best to be humble about it. Honestly I just wanted to be normal. I'd trade looks for that in a second.

I caught one of the boys staring at me curiously. It was unlike the way the other boys had stared at me in the past. No. Most boys and even full grown men will look at me with lustful eyes. Then they'll try to hit on me.

This boy however looked at me curiously. I had to admit that for a human he was cute. He had jet black hair, light skin, and some muscles. Not a lot of muscles but enough to let you know that he did lift some weights at the gym. His light blue eyes were very beautiful.

We only stopped looking at each other when his name was called. Eric. That was his name. I liked it. He glanced over at me one more time before walking out of the building.

I received a dorm key, rule book, pamphlets, and my class schedule. I had selected all of my classes and times a long time ago of course But one of my professors had not been listed though. Biology.

Isabella Marie Swan. This was my Biology professor.

Please Review