Chapter 2: Sebastian's Badge of Courage

Wheelchair-bound Patton Plame waited patiently in the dimly lit, yellowish tiled room of the 4th floor ICU at Tulane Medical. Lying in the hospital bed in front of him was a much sedated Sebastian with an octopus of tubes and wires sticking out of his body. It had been years ago, but he remembered being in a similar room. He remembered it like it was yesterday - the smells, the sounds, and of course, the pain. It was all too familiar. He stared at the figure in the bed and all he could think about was how much he took Sebastian for granted. Patton found special delight busting his chops and sometimes he even seemed quite the bully, although he never meant any real harm by it. Besides, Patton loved to have the last word in everything. He would never admit the fact that without Sebastian, he wouldn't have a rival worthy of the same level. And someone with a brain of his caliber needed to be challenged. Sebastian filled that need. Seeing his opponent so quelled was just not right. By then, everyone was aware of what Sebastian had done to get himself into this mess. Sebastian's sacrifice didn't come as a surprise to Patton. Sebastian always had it in him to fight for things he believed in. Patton just didn't want to lose a good friend.

Sebastian had only been out of surgery a little over two hours ago. A team of surgeons were called into the ER to operate. They dug out the bullet, quickly stopped the bleeding, and managed to stabilize him. It was something short of a miracle that the bullet didn't hit anything vital. However, the loss of blood and extensive surgery left him very fragile and weak. The doctors felt it wise to keep him in intensive care for the next twenty four hours just to be safe. There was always a chance that things could go wrong. Shortly after wrapping things up at the crime scene, Pride was later joined by Agents Brody and LaSalle at the hospital.

Meredith Brody sat on a plastic chair taking occasional swigs at a cup of coffee she bought from the coffee machine down the hall. It was only earlier that morning that she spoke to Sebastian via teleconference from the squad room. He was unusually chirpy because he was so excited about going to the Wizard World Comic Con next weekend. He'd been looking forward to it all year. For the short period of time she'd known Sebastian, she had grown to appreciate his knack for perfection. In many ways, he reminded her a little bit of herself at that age. It saddened her to think he was now hanging onto dear life. Then thoughts of her twin sister Emily flooded her mind. She remembered the day they told her Emily had been killed by a drunk driver. The pain was more than she could bear and she didn't want to have to go through that again.

While Brody was lost in her thoughts, Christopher LaSalle was fidgety. He paced a bit. Then sat down and picked up an old edition of a National Geographic magazine from the table. He tried to read the article on capuchin monkeys in the Amazon rainforest, but nothing sunk in. His mind was very uneasy. Not only was he afraid for Sebastian, he was downright angry. He was angry for not being there to protect him. Sebastian was brainy and broke many cases with his worldly knowledge but he didn't know the first thing about strategy and even less about self-defense. He often acted without thinking of consequences and that was dangerous. With the teasing and amicable bullying aside, LaSalle considered Sebastian like a brother. He needed Sebastian to pull through.

Pride spent his time talking to Dr. Wade and occasionally slipping out of the waiting room to make a phone call. It was an especially big weight on his shoulders because Sebastian made the ultimate sacrifice by jumping in front of a bullet for him. If it wasn't for Sebastian's selflessness, he would've been dead. Pride needed retaliation, but revenge had already taken place with Scraggly Beard lying in the morgue. Somehow, he felt it wasn't fulfilling enough. He wanted more.

Everyone was holding their breath and anxious for good news on Sebastian. The waiting was worst of all because it meant sitting around growing more and more restless by the minute. Not having any answers fueled their worry and skepticisms. After what felt like an eternity, one of the doctors came out to tell them the results. It was made clear that although the surgery was successful, the rest was really up to Sebastian.

Only brief visits were allowed and Pride, Dr. Wade, Brody, and LaSalle all sat with Sebastian a while. Pride was the last of the group to leave and therefore had run into Patton in the hall. Patton had arrived to the hospital late because after hearing what happened, he was adamant about cracking the microchip. He didn't want to wait around and let anxiety get the best of him. He felt a need to not only keep busy, but also obligated to unlock the mystery behind the piece of evidence that Sebastian protected and risked his life for. It was the only way to cope with Sebastian being critical. It didn't take long for Patton to figure it out at all. After all, he was a genius and very tech savvy.

Patton had been sitting by Sebastian's bedside for a long time. He knew there was nothing he could do to make Sebastian heal faster. And certainly, sitting there and starring at him was not going to make a difference. He did have an option of going home or off on some hot date, but somehow, there was no place he'd rather be than by Sebastian. Maybe he stayed because he figured Sebastian needed to know someone was there for him, or at least so that he could feel the energy of a positive presence around him. When Patton closed his eyes, he could hear the all-too-familiar sounds of beeps and dings from monitors. The funny smell of medicines and disinfectants tickled his nose. He realized how far he'd come from that dreadful night some years ago - The Accident, he called it. He chuckled lightly at thought of keeping the "how" part a secret. Though the actual reason for him ending up permanently wheelchair-bound wasn't much of a special story, it was just the idea of stringing everyone along that made him the most intriguing and mysterious man of the hour.

Patton didn't want to over analyze the situation, but he realized how poorly Sebastian appeared. Sebastian was already thin and pasty on a usual everyday basis, but now, he was just even more thin and pasty. He was barely recognizable with his glasses removed and hair devoid of massive gel. If he didn't mess with his looks so much, he would actually be considered quite attractive. A piece of brown hair had fallen over his forehead. Not only did it shave years off his face, but it also made the dark circles under his eyes more prominent. He looked like he would shatter to a million pieces with a single touch. A thermal blanket had been pulled up to his armpit. It covered his polka-dotted hospital gown, which concealed the thick bandage protecting the wound. There was a short rise and fall of the chest as the patient breathed. Then Patton noticed the bandaged hand. The hand was wound up with layers of white gauze. They said it took four stitches to close that cut.

The hours soon inched into the night. There had been no change in Sebastian's condition. Patton stifled a yawn and was about to doze when he heard a soft moan. He blinked back the tiredness from his eyes and studied Sebastian closely. He got pretty excited at the thought of Sebastian regaining consciousness so he can be the first to tell him what a jackass he was for scaring everyone like that. Sebastian breathed a little harder and stirred uncomfortably. A louder moan escaped his lips followed by Sebastian opening his eyes. Patton was anticipating a where-am-I? or what-happened? or how-long-have-I-been-out? response, but to his surprise, he got something totally unexpected.

Sebastian hadn't said a word, but his eyes locked onto Patton. Instantly, tears brimmed behind his smoke-grey eyes and flowed down his cheeks. He couldn't speak because his throat felt too dry and raw. But Patton understood the amount of pain just by the expression in Sebastian's eyes. Sebastian's face contorted into a grimace. He choked on a sob after drawing in a breath of air. It only took a second for the monitors to sound off a symphony of bleeps as he became more agitated. Patton's first instinct was to get the nurse, but before he could call for one, a nurse appeared in the doorway with a dose of morphine. He pushed his wheelchair in reverse and allowed the nurse to do her job. Ever so calmly, she injected the morphine into his IV drip.

"Is he alright?" Patton asked, needing reassurance.

"The painkillers have worn off. Giving him another dose. This should do the trick." The nurse said as she finished up her task. "It'll knock him out, but at least it will give him some relief from the pain."

Patton looked sorrowfully at Sebastian, who seemed spent from the crying. The nurse double checked all the machines, scribbled something quick on the chart, and closed the door softly behind her when she left.

"Looks like you're in good hands." Patton said darting his eyes over to where the nurse had been standing. "And, hey, she's cute too." He joked, trying to make light of the situation. He did not expect an answer in return, seeing as how things were.

Sebastian's uneven breathing became more stable as he allowed the drugs to work in his system. He just looked completely drained of energy. Muscle spasms made his body twitch slightly. It wasn't a very pleasant sight to see. In fact, it was a bit scary if one wasn't prepared for these little episodes. But Patton had more experience than anyone would ever know on the physical healing process. So, this did not horrify him. He wanted to be able to say that he knew exactly what Sebastian was going through but that wasn't entirely true. Sebastian was involved in a hostage turned deadly shootout - not something that most ordinary people would encounter. The trauma would be enough to mess with someone's mind for a long time. Patton figured Sebastian needed to know he was safe more than anything else.

"You're going to be ok. Ain't no one's gonna hurt you. They'd have to go through Triple P first. So, don't you worry." Patton offered. Two more tears fell when Sebastian blinked. Although he didn't say anything, he seemed to understand what Patton was telling him.

The morphine and other drugs were ebbing away the pain and rendering him very drowsy. His whole body tingled at the high dosage. He leaned his head further back against the pillow. He didn't try to speak mostly because he didn't have the energy to. Somehow, he knew Patton wouldn't take it personal. He realized he must look pretty awful for Patton not to give a smart remark. It really wasn't in Patton's nature not to boast about something. Sebastian let out a weak groan defining his misery. Sleep had drawn on him and he wasn't going to fight it. It was only a matter of seconds before his eyes fell to a close. He sighed tiredly and passed out again.

"Yea, you get some rest." Patton concluded softly. "Damn it." He muttered to himself and shook his head in dismay.

Patton watched Sebastian sleep for a while. The thought came to him of how little recognition was given to the forensics examiner. He was often teased and taunted. When they needed a guinea pig for their experiments or theories, he was ever present and automatically nominated. He didn't mind it and never complained. Everyone relied on him for all the answers and he's never let anyone down. They came to Sebastian because they knew he would provide them with the knowledge. Sebastian was a quirk but he was good at his job. He cracked more cases than anyone could give him credit for. Yet he often sat back while everyone else shined. No one stopped to acknowledge the importance of his role in the equation. If it hadn't been for him, they wouldn't have gotten as quick and far as they did with the cases. Everyone relied on him for all the answers and he's never let anyone down. If he doesn't make it through this one, he would've surely let them all down.

"You better hurry up and get well because you still owe me a rematch. Don't think I've forgotten about that. You gotta gimme the satisfaction of whooping your ass. We're gonna up the ante this time - winner pays for dinner at Chez Pierre. I'm looking forward to basking in victory and savoring every bite of that succulent crawfish gumbo. A little bullet ain't gonna be your excuse this time. You ain't getting out of it that easy." Patton said flatly in a combined tone of jest, intimidation, and affection.

Patton, of course, was referring to the strategic world of chess. The only worthy opponent Patton could find for the game was Sebastian. This was because, like Patton, Sebastian was really good at chess. In fact, Sebastian was a chess champion in his college days. He had competed and won various chess tournaments all over the nation. Patton had his share of wins and has been around the chess circuit himself. But when he found out Sebastian once held the title for US Champion, Patton knew he had to take a stab at beating the best. Thus far, Patton had not succeeded and shelled out quite a lot on beer money, but he was ever hopeful and confident that "next" time, the tables would be turned. Sebastian enjoyed the challenge and the company. And he vowed that just maybe one day, he'll be nice and let him win. But that wouldn't be any time soon because not only did Sebastian like winning, he also liked the free beers.

"Please." Patton whispered in prayer after a pause.

N~N~N

Oblivious to how much time had passed, Sebastian expected to see Patton at his bedside when he next woke. Instead, he found Pride staring at him with a bemused grin. He couldn't tell how long Pride had been sitting there, but judging from the waning light from the window, it was night. Sebastian thought it funny that Pride should be here instead of at The Trutone manning the kitchen. On a busy evening like this, his famous Cajun jambalaya should be high in demand. Sebastian was in pain again, but he dared not show it in front of Pride. Pride was strong and fearless. Sebastian had to be the same. But it was hard because it seemed like every muscle in his body was connected to the wound. And each time he moved anything, a spasm of pain exploded. Eventually, he found it better to stay still.

"Good to have you back." Pride greeted.

"It's late. Shouldn't you be - " Sebastian drawled.

"...at The Trutone." Pride finished his sentence. "Yes, I know. But I figured you could use some company. Besides, Buckley's got it covered."

"Patton was just here." Sebastian swallowed. He sounded confused.

"Oh, that was last night. You've lost a whole day's time. Brody just left not too long ago and LaSalle was here earlier. Had us really worried there for a moment that you weren't going to make it. You had to be kept under sedation because of the pain." Pride explained. "But the doctor says you'll be fine now. You're very lucky. Do you remember what happened?"

"Yea, things are a bit fuzzy. But yea, I remember." Sebastian answered. His voice was soft and feeble.

"The next time you decide to do something spontaneous like that, gimme some warning, huh?" Pride joked. "You nearly knocked my teeth out with that tackle."

"Sorry. I guess I didn't know my own strength." Sebastian apologized sheepishly. He felt the need to shift position. But as soon as he did that, pain broke out and he whimpered.

"Take it easy or you'll tear those stitches."

"Never knew being shot could hurt so much. It's not like in the movies at all." Sebastian hissed through clenched teeth as the pain passed.

"No, it's very real indeed." Pride said. "Well, don't worry, the scar will be a good conversation piece. You know, to impress the chicks." He teased.

"Yea, just great. My badge of courage." Sebastian sighed dramatically. After sharing a short laugh, the room grew quiet. It wasn't an awkward sort of silence, but more like a letting the events of the last 48 hours finally sink in. Sebastian was aware of how close he came to being killed and part of him was surprised that he survived. Stranger things have happened, but this really made him believe that someone upstairs was really looking out for him. Perhaps his guardian angel had been working overtime.

Near-death experiences were often speculated upon and talked tirelessly about. Perhaps it was the mystery that shrouded around the experience. Only a small percentage actually lived to tell the tale so it was only natural that people would be curious about it. Sebastian never imagined he'd turn into a statistic. He sort of cheated death and that made him special. He never imagined he would fall into that category. He's only ever heard of these cases on TV or read about them in some article. He was convinced that it wasn't as glamorous as people set it out to be. His life did not flash before his eyes, nor were there any bright lights at the end of a dark tunnel. There were no angels or other beings telling him it "wasn't his time yet" and ordering him back to the land of the living. There were no out-of-body experiences of watching himself die. He didn't experience anything like that at all. He only remembered enduring a massive amount of pain, followed by darkness, and the next thing he knew, he woke up in the hospital. If there were any unexplainable phenomena, he didn't remember it. However, he was aware that he had done something extraordinary - something that the everyday run-of-the-mill, average Sebastian Lund wouldn't do. He came out of this a hero because he saved someone's life in the most sacrificial way. And as if that wasn't enough, the person he saved happened to be Supervisory Special Agent Dwayne Pride. It was a big deal, yet he didn't feel any different. Hero or not, he was the same old Sebastian. To be honest, Sebastian wasn't concerned with gaining recognition for his heroic deed. He only done the right thing, a rule he always lived by, and that was enough. His attention turned to his bandaged hand. Although he could wiggle his fingers, the bandages were still wound securely around his palm and wrist. It didn't hurt as much and he was getting used to the pinch and itch.

"What about the microchip?" Sebastian suddenly remembered. His sudden excitement caused a short pitched bleep and spike on the heart monitor.

"Patton processed it. The chip contained encrypted secret bank account numbers, cyphered funds, and private financial records of high profiled officials. Anyone with that kind of info could easily use it to blackmail some pretty powerful people, senators, congressmen, Supreme Court judges, you name it. As it turns out, Petty Officer Laveau had an agenda of his own. He was planning on selling the information to the highest bidder and skipping the country. We found a packed suitcase and a one way ticket to the Cayman Islands in his apartment. He implanted the chip in his arm hoping it would be a safe place for it in the meantime." Pride explained. "Laveau met his demise at The Easy Lounge because he couldn't keep his mouth shut. There were drugs, booze, and all sorts of trouble there. Laveau got drunk and blabbed his million dollar plan to the two thugs - Jason Miller and Stan Alder, which we had the pleasure of meeting in your lab. They killed Laveau and made it look like an overdose. But before they could extract the chip, they were interrupted. They had to leave and return to the body later. By then, the place was swarming with cops. They had to follow the body and lay low until a better opportunity came. As coincidence would have it, Jason Miller had ties to Senator Josiah Jones. So, we can only assume that there was something really incriminating on that chip that would taint the Senator's good name. It was desperate measures and they resorted to violence."

Sebastian drew back a little when a name was put to the face of the bearded man who shot him. It was like as if he didn't deserve a name, especially for what he done to him. Jason Miller would be the name and face to remember for a long time. In fact, it was hard not to keep from reliving that moment over and over each time he closed his eyes. Sebastian didn't want anyone to think he'd gone mental, so he thought it best not to mention it.

"So, what came of the trace we found on the vic's shoe?" Sebastian asked.

"It was unrelated. The trace was there because Petty Officer Laveau did a lot of hiking in The Kisatchie National Forest." Pride answered.

"So, it's over." Sebastian's comment came across sounding like a cross between a comment and a question.

"Yes, pretty much. We're just tying up some odds and ends. But there isn't anything for you to worry about. You need to just concentrate on healing and getting well." Pride reassured.

"Yea." Sebastian muttered, but didn't sound too enthusiastic. He thought of something and it looked like he wanted to say something, but was maybe afraid to bring it up.

"What?" Pride questioned. "You have something to say, so say it."

"I - I was..." Sebastian hesitated for a second then continued. "I was just thinking of the lab. It's ruined, huh?" His voice quivered.

"I won't lie to you. It's pretty bad in there."

"Oh." Sebastian turned his gaze to the folds in his blanket. He couldn't bring himself to looking at Pride.

"Maybe it needed to happen - the assault on the lab, I mean." Pride said with a small smile developing on his lips. Sebastian looked up and his big grey eyes were glossy, holding back tears. "You can't rebuild something if there's no good reason for it. The department has granted a complete renovation of the lab." Pride revealed.

"But h-how? They barely had the funds for a new mass spectrometer. How can they afford a new lab?" Sebastian gasped in amazement.

"Under the circumstances and after twisting a few arms, they agreed." Pride kept it short. He decided to spare Sebastian the long and boring details. "We'll have state-of-the-art equipment and updated technology – everything you'll ever need right at your fingertips. You're going to like this new and improved lab. Just when I didn't think you could be more efficient, this is going to make you seem like Superman. Meanwhile, the lab needs a lot of cleaning and we've all been pitching in to sweep and mop up the debris. Fixing it back up is the least we could do - is the least I could do. Even Danny and CJ have volunteered to help out on the weekends."

"Wow, I don't know what to say..." Touched, Sebastian's voice trailed off.

"You know, I've been trying to understand what on earth possessed you to do what you did back there. At first, I thought you were just being foolish and not thinking rationally. But then I get it. It's the lab. That lab was your lifeline - the one place that made you feel safe. You were in your element and you were in control. And when those guys came in and threatened to take that away from you, your first instinct was to fight back in any way you could. You weren't going to let them have the satisfaction of getting what they want - even if it meant risking your life."

"You have me all figured out, haven't you?" Sebastian said. He had to admit that Pride's analytical skills were rather impressive.

"Am I off by much?" Pride insisted.

"No, it's accurate – more or less." Sebastian admitted. There was no sense in hiding it now that it wasn't such a big secret anymore. "The lab was the last straw. I just couldn't let them take you too."

"I gathered that." Pride beamed. "I'm grateful that the lab was all they ended up taking away. We both came out of it alive and the microchip has been secured. Look Sebastian, I know how much that lab meant to you. Actually, we all do. It's pretty obvious. But the lab can be replaced. We can't replace you. I want to say what you did was most irresponsible and reckless, but if you had chosen to do nothing, I would've been killed. You did it to save me." His voice faltered. "This is my fault. I was supposed to have the situation under control. None of this should've happened. I take it onto myself that you have to go through this. I'd do anything to trade places with you or at least help you bear some of the pain."

"It's not your fault. The whole situation may have freaked me out but at that moment, I knew exactly what I was doing. My mind had never been so clear." Sebastian said surely. "I have no regrets and I'd do it again, if I had to."

"You're treating this like it's no big deal. Do you realize what you did? You took a bullet that had my name on it. You almost died."

"I know. Sometimes, I even surprise myself." Sebastian quipped. "Dodging bullets is ok. Just don't expect me to go skydiving anytime soon. Scares the shit out of me."

"After all this, I'm glad you still have your sense of humor." Pride laughed. "But with all the joking aside, you did a brave and honorable thing."

"All in a day's work." Sebastian offered a tired grin.

"What I'm trying to say is - thank you. I am forever in your debt." Pride said with heartfelt sincerity.

"Naw, you don't owe me anything. As you may recall, you also saved my life back there, so I say we're even."

"You are an important part of our family and not expendable. I hope you know that."

Family. Sebastian looked at Pride with a semi-shocked expression. Although they were clear when it came to emotions, those were words he did not expect to hear Pride actually say. In fact none of these words were ever said out loud. But deep in everyone's gut, they all knew where they stood. Perhaps Sebastian needed to hear it sometimes, just to be reminded that it was true.

"And we're all gonna help you get back on your feet. Gunshot wounds aren't exactly the easiest things to recover from, but you'll do fine - especially when I fill you up with a delicious helping or two of my Shrimp Étouffée. It's a secret family recipe passed down from my great-aunt Sophie."

"That sounds awesome right about now. I'm kinda starved." Sebastian said in mid-yawn. Even though he had been knocked out for a day, he was still extremely tired.

"That's good. Hunger is the first sign of progress." Pride stated. Although Sebastian tried to cover up his pain and discomfort, nothing really escaped Pride's eye. Sebastian appeared in such a sickly state that it was impossible to not notice. The surgery had taken a lot out of him and he needed time to build back his strength.

"Yea, it could also be considering the last thing I ate was a jelly donut and that was nearly two days ago. Right now, I see I'm hooked up to a delicious saline-based diet." Sebastian said with an unamused tone, referring to the IV drip attached to his arm.

"You'll get something solid as soon as you're able." Pride laughed. "There will be plenty of time for that at the welcome-back party, which by the way, is already in the works, so we're counting on you for a quick recovery."

Sebastian felt warm and fuzzy. It may have been due to the combination of strong painkillers and the slight fever that was brewing in his body. But majority of the emotion came from being deeply touched. No one had ever thrown him a party before. Of course, there had been small birthday dinners and such, but nothing big that was done especially in his honor and where everyone was invited. It was flattering but at the same time, scary because he was so used to being a behind-the-scenes sort of guy, that propelling him into the spotlight was a little more than intimidating.

Being able to belong somewhere was the one thing Sebastian always wanted. He often found a way to adapt to his surroundings – perhaps it was his survival skills kicking in, but he never felt like he truly "fit" anywhere, until now. There were plenty of times when tensions sparked but at the end of the day, they had each other's backs. Sebastian wasn't receptive to the comradery at first. He put up a barrier and never got too close for fear of being hurt, just like all those other times in his past. His defenses were impenetrable but Pride was able to convince Sebastian otherwise.

It was evident that Sebastian was considered a worthy part of the team. He may not be as admirable as Pride, nor as patient as Dr. Wade, nor as intuitive as Brody, nor as athletic as LaSalle, nor as relentless as Patton, and he might even be a little rough around the edges, but these people accepted him. To them, he was reliable Sebastian and that made him who he was. There was no need for him to be walking around like a lost soul any longer because he was surrounded by good people who genuinely cared about him unconditionally. It took him a while to realize it, but this was his family. He belonged and he was happy.

The End