Summary: My name is Kousaka Honoka. I am an average high school girl… or at least, what I though. After recently confessing my love to a friend, I got rejected and the day after, I woke up with an unbearable pain in the chest. I was sent into a hospital where I was told I was going to die in less than two months.

HonoMaki – Normal narration

"HonoMaki" – Talking

"HonoMaki" – Thoughts

'HonoMaki' – Important fact, sarcasm, word emphasis

HonoMaki – Note

"HonoMaki" – Other people's quota

Disclaimer: I do not own anything mentioned here… be it show, anime, game or any character that might appear in this story. I will only tell it once!

[-x-x-x-]

Chapter 1: Goodbye

"My name is Kousaka Honoka, 16 years-old and a second year student at Otonokizaka high. I am member of the idol research club as well as the school idol group known as µ's alongside eight awesome friends."

Everything started that day. I was silently sitting behind my desk in the usually boring classroom of the second years while the teacher was explaining something.

"The truth is that… actually, I fell in love with someone."

My brain couldn't register anything the woman was saying. I just stared blankly between the glass window and the blackboard without paying attention to my surrounding.

"Her name is Minami Kotori. We knew each other since childhood. She is a kind, caring and supportive person. She is always there for me."

I occasionally stole some glance at the girl in question. The blowing wind coming from the open window made her long silky ash-brown hair dance to its pace. My hair was slightly blown by the wind as well, but I didn't mind it as I returned into my little dream world.

"Today, we don't have practice. It's the best opportunity to confess. I will do so as soon as class will end."

It seemed like a never-ending day. Class was boring as ever. I just spend the day watching the clock, hoping for the time to pass faster.

The long awaited bell finally rang after what seemed like an eternity. My heart started beating faster from mixed feeling. In one hand, I was happy that I was finally able to convey my feelings for my best friend, but I somehow felt scared. I didn't know why I was afraid, maybe it was just nervousness.

I didn't let these feelings perturb my new resolve though and quickly walked toward Kotori's seat, without even tidying my stuffs. I had to make it as quick as possible.

"Ne; Kotori-chan!" I gave her the best smile I could. "Do you have a minute?" I tried to sound natural. I just hoped she didn't think I was being weird.

"I guess it's OK!" she returned back the smile.

I just waited for few seconds as she gathered her things before standing up. I led the way and she followed behind after we waved goodbye to our classmates.

It didn't take long for us to get to the rooftop. I walked near the cell bars as Kotori just stood near the door. There was a brief silence as I thought of the best approach. "Should I just say it boldly or should I turn around the pot a little?"

The shorter among us was the one who break the awkward silence as she laughed nervously. "So, what did you wanted to tell me, Honoka-chan?"

Her voice, her tone, her adorable face… I loved them all… but what I loved the most about her was her caring and supportive personality.

I was starting to feel nervous and slightly fidgeted as I turned into her direction. I met her smile and regained confidence instantly. "It's now or never!"

I gathered all the piece courage within each cell from my body. "The truth is that I love you Kotori-chan! I love your caring and gentle personality. I realized that I wanted to be always with you." I paused an instant to catch my breath. "So do you want to by my girlfriend?"

An awkward silence was filling the air. My ash-haired friend was certainly shocked by that declaration. Then, her shocked expression turned into a sad one.

"Honoka-chan!" She looked down at her feet, avoiding eye contact. "I'm glad you like me that much, but..." she bit her lips. "...sorry! I can't become your lover."

"Why is that?" I asked in surprise.

"I'm sorry, Honoka-chan... I can't accept your feelings." She started to sob as I could see tears falling on her cheeks.

As I watched my friend breaking into tear, I could feel my vision blur and wetness on my cheeks. "Why?" I inquired in a low tone. She didn't answer. She was just looking down, tears flowing from her eyes. That was when I realized my error. I realized it was a mistake to confess like that.

"I'm sorry, Kotori-chan! I asked you something impossible..."

"It's not your fault, Honoka-chan" She talked again, still not looking at me. "I-It's me the problem..."

"But what's wrong?" I tried to ask her. That question only worsened the atmosphere..

"I-I can't tell you... I'm sorry, Honoka"

I knew she didn't want to tell the real reason of her refusal, so I tried to accept her decision. "I got it!" After gathering all my remaining strength, I did my best smile for my best friend "I won't ask you about it anymore. So… could we stay friends".

"Honoka-chan..." she tried to wipe away her tears "...I'm so sorry..."

We didn't exchange any more word as we took different ways. As she went straight home, I decided to go back to the classroom to take my belongings.

It was annoyingly calm as the other students were all gone by the time I was done tidying my stuffs – since I took my time, making it slow to be sure that everyone was already gone. I wasn't really on the mood to talk to anyone right at that time.

[-x-x-x-]

"Welcome home!" Mom greeted as I entered the house. "So, how was school?" Even though she smiled at me, I wasn't feeling in the mood yet.

"It was ok..." I weakly answered her, the tone of my voice dull.

I was sure that she actually could realize it wasn't the case. Just as she opened her mouth, ready to ask something, I started looking at down at the floor. At the end, she didn't say anything and just walked toward the kitchen. "Diner is already ready, so… How about you change first?"

I then excused myself and went toward my room without any word. Once in my room, the first thing I did was to lock the door and then fell directly on the bed with my eyes ready to cry again. I silently let go of all the tears until I was satisfied.

Fortunately, it didn't take long for my heart to be satisfied and I quickly whipped the remaining tears on my cheeks before changing into more casual clothes and went downstairs.

Dinner went without problem; I excused myself once again right after cleaning the dishes and went straight toward my room for a sleep.

"I think I should rest for now.." I laid flat on the bed and closed my eyes after burying my head under a pile of pillow. "I will see what to do tomorrow..."

That was a very long night.

The morning, I was awaken by a pain in my chest. I was an unusual one. It pained me so much that I ended up screaming loud enough as Yukiho and my parents ran into my room in panic.

"What's wrong?" Mom asked, obviously concerned.

"My chest... my chest hurts..." I tried gasped to explain, my voice was shaking and near inaudible due to the pain.

Father quickly called a taxi and I was sent directly at the hospital. Of course, I fell unconscious on the trip due to the pain.

After regaining conscience, the first thing I saw was an unusual ceiling. It wasn't my room anymore. As to find a clue about the current location, I inspected the surrounding and it was hard to not realize that I was dressed in a blue pajama, lying on a hospital bed.

"What happened? Why am I here?" As I was trying to remember what happened, Mom entered the room.

"Honoka, how are you? You really scared us, you know." I could see she was really concerned by her facial expression and the tone of her voice.

"I'm sorry, mom... I..." I couldn't find the right words. I just looked down and fidgeted with the white blanket.

We were interrupted by a young man who wore a white coat and had a small badge attached to it. He must have been a doctor. "Ah, you're awake, miss. How do you feel right now?" the first thing he did was to look at the serum placed by the bed's side.

"I-I'm fine..." I answered weakly.

"Good! You will have to pass some tests later. Be sure to rest well for now." After saying that, he just left the room. My deduction was that they were busy workers and had to move to the next patient quickly.

[-x-x-x-]

Four (04) hours has passed since the test. I was just sitting on the bed, bored of the TV. I tried to change my mind by reading a magazine but had no effect. Then, I just closed my eyes and counted.

Finally, my mother entered the room after I was on 2000. "Can you stand up?" She asked, not making direct eye contact. By the seriousness of her tone, even someone like me could have guessed that something was not right.

"Yes, I can!" I just answered, ignoring the nervousness that just built up in my chest.

"Then, come with me." She finally looked at me straight and I saw the seriousness expression on her face. I silently followed her until we reach an office.

As we entered in, we were greed by a young woman wearing a white coat that resembled what the guy from earlier had. Yukiho and my father were sitting around a table, eyes down as a gloomy atmosphere was filling the air.

The woman took place on a chair at the other side of the table as Mom and I took place across her. I could feel Mom's right hand placing on my trembling hands – that were placed on my lap. One thing I realized that my skin was slightly paler than usual, especially for my hands… and on top of that, I couldn't stop the shacking of my body. It wasn't because of the cold since the room had conditional air and might have not been of fear because I knew that my family was there to support me.

"So, let's begging," The woman was the one who broke the silence. "After looking at your test results, it is revealed some abnormality about your body condition. We could have seen some damage within the heart, lungs and stomach area." She explained us and I just nodded in agreement.

She just turned around the discussion for a while as to explain what kind of result we got. She showed up some papers and after seeing that my eyes weren't totally focused on the papers, she let out of a sigh.

"After analyzing your results, we came to a conclusion" She took a deep breath and looked at me with a gentle expression on her face while displaying a bitter smile. "You are going to die soon. You have two months remaining. We are really sorry! We did our best, but the damage within your organs were already too propagated." She said in a low voice.

I fell like crying, but nothing came. My mouth was just left agape as I stared at the woman. I could see her lips moving – surely to give more scientific explanation – but my brain couldn't register anything anymore.

I saw her lips stopped and took it as a sigh that she was done. I just looked down at the table in from on of me. "I-I see..." That was all I could say.

I slightly lifted my head to see my parents looking down, the awkwardness and gloomy mood intensifying. Mom tightened her grip on my hands while Father was trying to comfort Yukiho. My sister was in a really bad state: messy hair, wet cheeks, and dull eyes from crying. I felt guilty for seeing her cute face being violated this way.

After staying silent for a while, the woman finally spoke again and brought a paper and a pen in front of me. There was lot of thing written on it, but I wasn't in the mood or reading anything. I only knew what I had to do.

I took the pen with my shaky hand and wrote my name in the 'signature' field. After doing so, I placed the pen back on the table and looked at the woman. For some odd reasons, I couldn't see her face, but a deep feeling inside of me told me she was someone I knew… At least, I saw few strands of red hair, but my vision was too unfocused to indentifying her.

[-x-x-x-]

That night, they cooked all the thing I likes. I forced myself to smile for them... but deep inside, I was cursing myself for being this hypocrite.

After dinner, I excused myself and went straight into my room. Not long after I was in the bed, I heard few knocks at the door.

"You can come in!" I said as Yukiho entered, squeezing a pillow.

"M-May I… sleep with you, tonight?" She shyly asked. How could I say no?

I just nodded in agreement as she walked in and slid into the bed. I moved at the side so that she could get enough space to sleep. After sliding inside the covers, we looked at each others and I couldn't help but to giggle. Her face turned slightly redder, but no one decided to say anything.

"Good night, sis!" Yukiho placed a kiss on the check and closed her eyes. I soon followed her.

When I woke up in the morning, my cute red-head of little sister was still wrapped in my arms. I gently stroked her hair, trying not to wake her. I couldn't help my lips from forming a smile.

After being satisfied on the 'daily Yukiho cuteness watching session', I finally slid out of the bed, doing my best for not waking her up.

I didn't bother changing as I walked out of the room, still wearing the blue pajama they gave us at the hospital. I wasted no time and went downstairs where I was greeted by Mom.

"Good morning, honey! Do you want to eat breakfast right now or…" The older woman saw my arrival at the kitchen and gave a smile.

I just walked in and sat at the corner as she was still busy arranging the assets. "It's ok!"

"Is Yukiho awake already?"

I just shacked my head from left to right in response, not in the mood for a long discussion. Talking has turned into such pain since the day before. I didn't know how come, but I always ended up gasping for air while panting heavily just from telling few sentences. The doctors said that it was because of my damaged lings and heart.

"I see... I am going to wake her in that case." Mom walked out of the kitchen after washing her hand. "I will be back soon!" She said while heading upstairs. I tried to give her a forced smile as I wasn't in the mood either.

As soon as she was out of sight though, my expression returned into emptiness. I just turned and watched at the ceiling while spaced out. I let go of a loud sigh. "It isn't like me to act like this… What happened to the energetic Honoka that everyone knows?"

They said I could have gone home the day before, but will be sent back to the hospital that day. They actually said something about staying there half-permanently for a while, but Father insisted and they agreed to let me go back the day before. "I think they actually wanted us to have a last happy family moment."

"Sis, are you ok?" I was brought back into reality by a familiar voice. My attention was fully turned to my younger sister, clad in her middle school outfit. She was looking at me with concern in the eyes.

"I'm ok!" I tried my best to smile as to avoid the question.

We then ate, with Yukiho and Mom occasionally stealing few glances at me. After we were done with breakfast, Father went to open the shop while Yukiho gave me a kiss on the cheeks before walking out the house.

As the door opened, I caught the sign of a blonde-haired cutie standing at the side road. She was holding her bag with both hand and was busy listening to some song – in my deduction as she had earplug on her ears.

Said girl turned to us as Yukiho walked next to the girl. She took her earplug off and waved at us. "Good morning, Honoka-san!"

"Good morning, Alisa-chan!" I forced another half-heart smile. Fortunately, that was enough to convince her.

"Let's go; Alisa!" Yukiho tugged on the younger girl's blouse sleeve. "We will be late at this rate."

[-x-x-x-]

After turning to the clock, I saw that it was already 10:00. I had to get ready fast as Mom was busy tidying few things. In less than an hour, I would be sent back to the hospital.

To my surprise when I walked down, I was greeted by six (06) familiar figures. I rubbed my eyes, thinking this was an illusion, but everything was real. Some members of µ's were sitting around the kotatu while drinking tea.

Nozomi was the first to see that I have arrived. "Hi; Honoka-chan! We came to visit you!"

The others soon turned to where the fortuneteller's attention was. I saw their faces brighten instantly as Rin jumped at my direction and engaged me in a bone-breaking hug. "Honoka-chan; nya!"

I couldn't help but to smile at the thought that they went to say goodbye. They apparently got the chairwoman's approbation.

We talked about more stuffs like clothes, food, makeup and such. They didn't mention anything about my terminal illness not even once. Everything went well until I finally realized that two persons were missing.

I didn't have to ask anything as Umi caught on my expression as if she was some kind of psychic. "Kotori got ill and couldn't get to school today. The Principle told us that she caught a cold and will be back to school by tomorrow."

I was somehow surprised to hear that she got sick and felt more guilt at the thought. "Is she in that bad state because of what I did?"

"Maki-chan couldn't make it either." Nico was the one that broke the awkward silence that just installed itself few seconds earlier. "We didn't hear anything about her since yesterday."

Rin and Hanayo just nodded. "She just assisted the first period and went home after her Mother called her. By the look on her face, it must have been something important."

After hearing that, Eli started looking down. "I don't know if it's the right time to say it, but…" She paused an instant as everyone's attention was gathered at her. "Honoka's files were withdrawn from the list of student at Otonokizaka. As for Maki's, I don't know the details, but the chairwoman asked me personally to bring her files and education certificates to her office. All I knew was that an old friend of her arrived at her office and asked for Maki's folder."

The others looked down. "In Honoka-chan's case, it's only normal…" Nozomi stated. "But why did Maki take her files? Is she planning on transferring school or…?"

"I don't know…"

"But how about µ's?" Hanayo silently stated.

The seven of us went silent after that question. We all knew that µ's was the nine (09) of us and it wasn't µ's anymore if even one member was missing.

First of, I got a terminal illness. No matter how much determination and dream I had, my illness was a serious one; one that reduces my physical abilities by 90%. What could I do with only 10% of the strength I once had… and it's only the beginning. The doctors said that my health will only worsen in the upcoming month.

Following that, we had Kotori not going to school. That was a première since she rarely missed school. We dedicated that something was wrong somewhere. Of course, I knew what made her this depressed, but I wasn't going to tell the µ's about my failed confession. I really wasn't in the mood.

And lastly, Maki took her files away. There are high chances that she would transfer or such.

[-x-x-x-]

At 10:30AM, it was finally time to go. Mom entered the room with a pursue in hand. She was well-dressed – at least compared to me who was just wearing the usual blue sky pajama from the hospital. Everyone waved all trying to be strong and gave me a smile.

Mom walked me to the hospital where we were greed by many nurse. They gave me the choice between some few pajamas. They said something like; "These will be your new uniforms.", so I took two blue and one pink. Well, there wasn't really that big choice since most of them had the same design, but I didn't let it bother my mind.

After placing the pajama I picked on a basket, they gave me a white wristband in witch my name, blood type and the code of the hospital was written in. "This will be your new ID now. Take good care of it and never remove that wristband at any circumstance!"

I just nodded as I took one last glance at the accessory. "Kousaka Honoka…" I let go of another sigh.

I waved goodbye to Mom – who was on verge of tears – and followed one of the nurse toward the elevator. She pressed the higher level.

"Stage seven!?" I pointed out. It was more a question than an exclamation.

She nodded in response. "It's actually a peaceful place you could stay in."

As the elevator's door opened, the first thing I realized was very high ceiling. The windows were just open of few centimeters – maybe fifteen (15) or less.

Everything was colored white and seeing such calm, yet desolating place worsened my mood even more. "It looks like I will be living on this boring place for certain among of time."

The nurse started leading toward the hallway until we arrived in front of a big white door. She pushed it open to reveal my new room. It was an individual one, and more depressing than I thought. It was very large, but empty. The only things in the room were a bed at the center of the room, a bedside table, a pliable chair placed at the edge of the room and a closed at the side.

After placing the changes of clothes – pajama – in the closet, the nurse bowed as I sat at the side of the bed before walking away. I was easily bored and opted to have a little walk around.

My pace of walking was weak and slow. My steps were quarter of the distance they used to be. That was when I really realized how much my strength was gone just by doing some meters.

After a couple of minute, I arrived at the living room. It was as empty as everything on this floor. The only things decorating that large room were a big TV, a couch, few pliable chairs and two small tables.

I took one of the pliable chairs and sat near the window. I let go of a sigh as I watched the blue and white sky outside. It was already winter, but the inside of the building had air conditioner, so…

My train of thought was suddenly interrupted at the sign someone entered the room. The seemingly young girl who had loosened waist-length brown hair just walked in my direction and sat on the chair beside of the one I was sitting at. She wore a pink pajama and her white wristband was a proof that she was a resident of the seven as well.

Looking at her made me realized how much I was staring to be careless these past hours. I didn't put my hair in the usual side-tail, let alone brush it. My hair was in a mess, just like my mind while my skin was getting a lot paler than it used to be.

Talking about witch, the brunette's skin was a lot paler than mine. I could have assumed that she was my senior-in-illness.

"So, at which are you?" The tone of her voice was void of any emotion. She didn't even take a look at me. She just stared blankly at the window.

"W-what?" I was surprised. I didn't know what she was referring to.

"So, it's your first time..."

"First time?" I fully turned to my attention at her as the petite girl let go of a sigh.

"So, no one has told you anything yet?" Her voice was still filled with emptiness. "The seven is the hospice." She started to explain after seeing that my full attention was at her words. "No one exits the seventh alive. Being sent here means you have less than six months left." She took a small pause, her face still as stoic as it was before. "No one stays permanently at the seventh though. You will be occasionally sent back home when you wish, but will be readmitted here at the first sigh of a possible health degradation."

I just nodded as I turned back into watching the sky. "So, that's how the seventh works…"

"There is never a fourth..."

That time, I didn't turn in her direction. It was as if some strange force glued my eyes to the window as. My vision however was far away. Even as I stared at that space, it was as if I wasn't looking at anything. It was really complex, but somehow, it didn't bother me at the least.

"...at your third trip to house, you can choose whenever you want to die at home or here at the seventh..." The petite girl continued without waiting for an answer. "I'm actually at my second... next time, I will have to choose where I want to die…"

We both let go of a silent sigh and I finally turned my attention back to her.

"I will only tell it once, so listen well…" She took another deep breath. "There is never a fourth time, if you want to flee, go the station B and not the A. If you don't want to burden your family, don't eat, don't drink; it will be quicker this way." It sounded like she was annoyed by telling that but just forced herself to pass the message.

They said lot of thing in the hospital… something like a secret law of the patient of the seventh. I never expected that I would be given the chance to be part of it as well.

"Be sure to repeat these words on your turn one day too."

That was the last sentence she said before standing up and walked toward the exit. I watched her and couldn't help but to read what was written on her wristband. "Thank you, Sakura-san!" I did my best to smile at smile.

"You can just me Setsumi." She replied with her usual emotionless voice before walking out of the room.

I turned back toward the window after the petite girl – also known as Sakura Setsumi – left the living room. I just watched as few flakes of snow started falling outside. "The seventh…?"

[-x-x-x-]

A/N:

Sakura Setsumi is a character from the visual novel (video game) Narcissu and the protagonist of its prequel: Narcissus Side 2nd.