I died. Again. It's not really a big deal anymore, I've done it so many times it's become normal. Not that it doesn't hurt; death is still a permanent goodbye to everyone I know and love in that life, but it's also a fresh beginning filled with new chances. I've come to accept it graciously. Goodbyes are a part of life, after all.

I don't know how old I am anymore. Definitely at least a millennium. I've lost track, though, due in part to the fact that not every world I've lived used the same calendar. Still, by most standards I am very old. I've done a lot of things in my many lives; fought monsters, toppled governments, killed gods, saved worlds. I've been a lot of things too; a ninja, a mother, an alien, an elf. I even spent some time as an AI.

But while I may be older than dirt, I once again found myself in the body of an infant. My new name was Kikyo and I had a pair of wonderful parents. Less than a year later, I also had a baby sister named Kairi. I always enjoyed having siblings, they made the early years pass more easily and enjoyably, and Kairi was no exception in that regard. She and I spent our days exploring our hometown, Radiant Garden, a peaceful place with little to endanger a pair of young girls. It was a magical place, in a very literal sense. Magic was a well-established fact in this world, and most people knew a couple simple spells. For my fourth birthday, my dad began teaching me a spell to light the fire in the fireplace. Mom wanted to start me with something less dangerous, but I insisted. By the time we were both four our parents trusted us enough to let us wander the city, so long as we didn't stray too far from our grandma, our eternal supervisor. Life was peaceful and quiet for a time, like it sometimes was, but as usual it didn't last. When Kairi was five and I was six, Radiant Garden came under attack.

We were in the market with our grandma, getting ingredients for dinner, when it happened. A black mass appeared in front of a merchant stand, resembling the opening of a corridor that led straight into darkness. From the mass crawled forth a dozen small, black creatures with yellow eyes. The creatures stood hunched over, their disproportionately large heads low to the ground. Their short arms swung wildly beneath their body, each tipped with three sharp claws. The crowd stared silently for a moment, giving the creatures the chance to strike first. One of them leapt onto the nearest bystander, claws swinging and mouth snapping. Blood flew, but not as much as I expected. The creature seemed to be aiming for light flesh wounds. If I had to guess, I would have said it's goal was to hurt, not kill.

The moment I saw the corridor I had expected trouble, the attack only solidified that feeling. I grabbed Kairi and ran in the opposite direction. I glanced back at just the wrong moment and witnessed our grandmother trip and fall. She yelled at us to keep running, she told me to take care of my sister and keep her safe.

I hesitated, torn between making sure Kairi was safe and trying to save Grandma. A pair of the creatures approached her fallen form, and I made my decision. Scanning the area for a weapon, I found a loose piece of piping. Ordering Kairi to stay put, I grasped the metal pipe in both hands and charged. I hadn't exactly trained my body for combat, but I didn't let that stop me. The first swing caught one of the creatures under the jaw, knocking its head up and back. The follow-up blow to the chest pushed it off my grandma's back. I think she was saying something to me as she struggled to get up, but I was too focused on the fight to hear her.

I cast the one spell I knew as I swung at the second creature. A handful of sparks leapt from the end of the pipe as I smacked it across its eyes; it wasn't much, but it seemed to give it enough extra oomph to push the creature back. I swung again, not fast enough to hit either creature, but in a wide arc to keep them from approaching while Grandma rose to her feet. When she stood, I grabbed her arm and pulled her back towards Kairi. Unfortunately, Kairi's situation wasn't much better. Somehow, three of the creatures had snuck past me and surrounded her. I ran, but I was too late. The first creature moved to attack her, but the moment it touched her a blinding light appeared. When the light cleared and I could finally see again, Kairi and all three of her attackers had disappeared.

I saw red. I wasn't sure exactly what had happened to her, but I knew I had failed to keep my sister safe. I was pissed; mostly at myself, but also a fair bit at the creatures that had caused my failure. I turned back to Grandma. She froze when she saw Kairi under attack, and she hadn't moved since. Which was bad, because she was about to be attacked by the two creatures from before again.

She looked straight into my eyes. "Run!" she ordered in the firmest and angriest voice I had ever heard from her. I took a step towards her, but she shouted again. By then it was too late. Both creatures leapt at her simultaneously. To my surprise, however, I didn't get the expected splash of blood. Instead, my grandma's body began to fade from sight. A bright light shone from her chest, and what looked like the cartoonish depiction of a heart floated out and up. As her body disappeared, a cloud of darkness gathered around her heart. The cloud condensed and coalesced until the heart had vanished, and in its place was a new black creature, thin and cylindrical with stubby arms and a mushroom hat.

I had no choice, I turned and ran. The creatures moved fast, but they seemed more interested in attacking the closer bystanders than one small girl. Even so, I didn't get far. There were black corridors everywhere, with dark creatures continuously crawling through them. As I ran, the corridors began to pulse, expanding and contracting with every passing second. I was only a few feet from one when they simultaneously exploded, releasing a wave of darkness across the plaza. When I finally opened my eyes again, the sun was gone. I couldn't see more than five feet in front of me, even after my eyes adjusted. I felt cold; the air temperature had dropped, but there was more to it than that. The cold seemed to reach deep into my soul and wrap around my heart. Ever since I lived a life as a ninja, bending the shadows to my whim, I had considered myself a creature of darkness. The dark was supposed to be comforting and enveloping, guarding you from the rest of the world. But this darkness felt wrong, invasive, untempered, and demanding.

A shift in the wind was the only warning I got before one of the creatures leapt from the darkness. I swung wildly, grazing its cheek. The creature landed on the ground and silently slithered away. My grip on the pipe tightened in anger. I had hoped for a peaceful life, and that blind hope had cost me my grandma and sister. My body was weak and untrained; I was out of my league and it looked like my foolish hope was going to cost me my own life as well.

Maybe it would be easier if I gave in, I thought. Give up and start over with another life, where I wouldn't screw up so badly. My head swam, and what little vision I still had faded further. I shook my head; like hell I was going to just give up. There! I saw a vague shape in the darkness and swung. My pipe hit empty air and I stumbled to the ground. I gasped for breath as the darkness pressed down, suffocating me. I managed to prop myself up on my knees with my pipe. A creature slowly approached me. The last thing I saw before the darkness took me were its gleaming yellow eyes.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

When I next woke was less of an interesting question than where I next woke up, because it wasn't Radiant Garden. I was lying on the stairs leading up to a massive skyscraper covered in neon signs. Similarly tall buildings surrounded an open plaza, lighting up the night sky the way only a large city can.

I wasn't alone. I counted five others in the plaza. Two boys, one with red hair, the other with blue, lay nearby, rising to their feet. Three other men stood nearby, wearing thick black cloaks with the hoods down. One had an eye patch on a heavily scarred face, another had silver hair, and the last had incredibly long dreadlocks.

"Finally awake," Eyepatch called. "Took you long enough."

"Who the hell are you?" Redhead demanded as he found his footing. I was content to let others do the talking for now. Something felt off about the situation, but I couldn't tell what.

"You lash out with anger on instinct, even when you no longer feel it," Silver-hair answered. "It must be deeply ingrained in your behavior."

"What do you mean I no longer feel it?" Redhead replied.

"My name is Xemnas. I am a Nobody, as are the three of you."

"That's a rather rude thing to call someone," I said, finally speaking up.

"Nonetheless, it is what we are, little girl," Xemnas responded. "Nobodies like us are born when a creature of light loses their heart to darkness, but refuse to stop existing. The heart is corrupted, turned into a creature called a Heartless, while the body and soul continue without it. That is what you are now."

"A Heartless?" Blue-hair asked. "Are those the creatures that attacked the town?"

"Correct. Without a heart, Nobodies are unable to feel genuine emotion. We can mimic it, because we still remember what it felt like, but it is only an act."

I realized very quickly that he was telling the truth. That was what seemed off, I wasn't having any emotional responses to anything happening. No flash of happiness that I was still alive, nor any panic or fear over being confronted by strangers in a dark, unfamiliar city. It reminded me of falling in to the black, but it wasn't quite same. There was still something there, a gnawing emptiness and a drive to fill it. A part of me was missing, and all I could feel was an overwhelming desire to get it back.

"How do we fix it?" I asked. "How do we undo what's happened to us?"

"That's what we're here for," Eyepatch answered. "We're part of an organization trying to get everyone new hearts. Xemnas here is our boss, I'm Xigbar, and tall, dark, and quiet over there's Xaldin. And lucky for you three, we're recruiting."

"I'll join," Blue-hair said, almost before Xigbar finished speaking. "My name is Isa, and I'd like to join your organization."

Xemnas held up his hand and Isa's name appeared between them. The letters swirled around Isa's body until they screamed to a halt in a new order. "From now until you have a heart once more, you shall be known as Sa'ix. Welcome to Organization XIII" Xemnas turned to the two of us who remained. "Will you join us as well?"

"I don't make a habit of making deals without knowing all the terms," I replied. "How exactly do you plan on getting us all new hearts?"

"A fair question. There exists a place, deep within the Realm of Darkness, the home of the Heartless, called Kingdom Hearts. It is a gathering point for the hearts of all the worlds. We intend to mimic this place here, above this city. When a Heartless is destroyed and a heart is unlocked, it will go to our new Kingdom Hearts, and when we have gathered enough, we will use them as materials to create our own, new hearts."

"That sounds good to me," Redhead said, and he stepped forward to receive his new name, Axel.

I almost joined him. I came so close; anything to fill that emptiness. But then I remembered. I remembered the type of person I used to be, the type of person I wanted to go back to being. I knew that if I ever succeeded at getting my heart back, but it came at the cost of thousands of other people's hearts, I would hate myself. That's not what I wanted to spend the rest of eternity feeling.

"The gathered hearts that you'll use as materials, they'll be destroyed in the process, won't they?" I asked, hoping against hope that they wouldn't be. That I could join this group and not have to worry about an angry conscience down the line.

"Yes, they will be," Xemnas responded.

"Then no deal," I said, though it was hard. "I wouldn't be able to live with myself if it came at the cost of so many others."

I turned to leave, only to find my path blocked as a spear flew through the air and landed in my path. I turned back to the Organization members, and saw two spears identical to the thrown one in Xaldin's hands.

Baggy clothes or no, there was no way he had brought three spears with without me noticing. "How did you do that?" I asked.

"Nobodies can barely be said to exist," he answered, finally breaking his silence. "For that reason we are born with weapons, because we must fight for what little existence we still cling to. My spears are as much a part of me as my arms." He approached until he was within arm's reach. "Few people your age would have the strength of heart to hold onto their shape upon becoming Nobodies. Those who do would cower, but you hold yourself like a warrior. Join us, and we'll teach you how to fight."

From the way he described it, it sounded like his weapon was a part of his soul. While he spoke I did some quick soul-searching, to see what was left after my heart had disappeared. Aside from the gnawing emptiness, I found a desire to survive and a will to fight. I called on that, reaching for it and drawing it out until I could feel it in the palm of my hand. "I said no." I swung my new weapon, a metal club resembling nothing more than a baseball bat, and connected with his hip. The moment it struck, it exploded. It reminded me of the time that I strapped C4 to a 2x4, except my bat survived the explosion, and I didn't end up with shrapnel and second-degree burns all along my arm. Xaldin wasn't so lucky; the explosion sent him flying out of my way, and I took the opening to run. Blood pounded in my ears as I headed for a nearby alley, but I still managed to hear Xemnas speak behind me.

"Leave her," he said. "She'll make her way back to us eventually. One way or another."

Not putting any faith in his words, I kept running until my legs burned and I could no longer breathe. Yellow eyes peered at me from dark corners, but nothing attacked me. A plan began to form in my mind as I moved. Xemnas had mentioned a place the Heartless called home, the Realm of Darkness. If my Heartless was anywhere, it was probably there. If I could get there and find it, I could probably figure out a way to take back my heart. It couldn't be too hard, right?