December 1975

"Where did you say that you got them from?" James asked as he eyed the small pile of fireworks.

"Kaleb Manley," Sirius replied as he pulled the pack of muggle matches from his coat pocket. "He got them from his neighbor, some muggle kid."

James picked up a large skinny rocket. "And they are supposed to be harmless?"

Sirius nodded. "Kaleb says that they just make a large colorful explosion. No smoke, no loud sounds, completely harmless."

James nodded his understanding. It was late afternoon. The temperature had dropped so drastically in the past hour that James had gone from feeling warm in his winter coat to being able to see his own breath like little puffs of smoke every time he breathed.

Sirius eyed his brother. He could see the apprehension on James' face. "If you don't want to do this…"

"No," James quickly shook his head. "Don't be barmy, it'll be great. Besides if we don't do this today we'll miss our chance."

Sirius knew that the words couldn't have been truer. With their father in the states for a few days and their mum visiting his sister they would be home alone for at least another hour. By that time the fireworks would be long gone, as would any evidence that they had been set off.

James watched in amusement as Sirius struggled with the small book of matches that they had swiped from their father's study. It always amazed him that for as bright as his brother was, muggle things could easily confuse him. James knew that it wasn't his fault. While his own parents often took the time to explain how muggle items worked, Sirius had grown up in a household with parents that shunned such things.

"You have to rip one off," James tried to explain. "And then strike the side with the thing on it," he pointed at the small match book, "You strike it just there."

Sirius gave him a peculiar look.

"Here let me," James held his hand out.

Sirius handed over the matches and watched in awe as James easily lit one.

Before the cold air could extinguish the flame, James leaned over and carefully held the fire against the fuse of one of the smaller rockets. The moment it ignited, he felt Sirius' hand firmly grip his arm and pull him backwards. James stumbled over his own feet and then watched in amazement as the rocket shot through the bare tree branches and exploded in the winter sky, causing a purple light show to take place above them.

"Wicked," James breathed softly.

Sirius nodded in agreement. "That was brilliant," he decided. "And quiet just like Kaleb said."

"Let's do a bigger one," James suggested as he took a step towards the fireworks. He pulled a match from the small book.

"That one there," Sirius said pointing to a large bundle.

James nodded as he quickly lighted a match. He held it to the fuse and once it ignited, took several steps backwards. The rocket shot into the air but unlike the last one that made it safely through the trees, this one became lodged between two branches.

"Shit," James swore loudly as the branches burst into flames with a loud popping sound.

Sirius quickly whipped his wand out and pointed it at the fire. "Aguamenti," he yelled causing a stream of water to shoot out of the tip of his wand.

Unfortunately it did little to help the fire which had quickly spread to the pine needles on the tree next to it.

"Try again," James suggested as he silently cursed himself for leaving his own wand lying on his bed. He was sure that if they had said the spell together it would have worked.

Sirius opened his mouth, ready to repeat the spell when the large branch that had originally caught fire snapped and broke off. It fell to the ground landing inches from the pile of fireworks that they had yet to set off.

"Aguamenti," Sirius tried once more, his voice now sounding desperate. The water streamed from his wand managing to put out some of the flames but not nearly enough.

"Run," James said in a frightened voice as he noticed the fire getting dangerously close to the fireworks.

Sirius heard his brother and saw him move several feet in the direction of their house. He did not follow him though; instead he pointed his wand at the flames and said the spell once more. He was determined to try and put the fire out. If they ran now they would be caught for sure.

"Siri," James said in a worried voice. "Come on, now!"

Sirius pointed his wand and said the spell once last time, producing dismal results, before giving up. He turned and started running. He was only a few inches behind James when he heard the explosion. Seconds later he felt a horrible burning on his elbow and his back.

James stopped running as he heard a dreadful sound come from his brother. He glanced back at Sirius to see that he was still moving just as quickly but his face was one of pure pain.

James looked up to see the branches above them littered with flames.

"Go!" Sirius yelled. As he ran past James he grabbed his brother's arm pulling him along with him.

Seconds later the two were out of the thick trees and back in the open space of their backyard.

"What in the world?" The confused voice muttered.

Sirius turned around, his body filling with dread as he saw their mother walking towards them.

"Mum," James said her name in a shocked voice. "We can explain! We were just –"

She held up her hand causing her son to trail off. Seconds later she withdrew and raised her wand. Saying a spell that her sons had never heard, she managed to make a large stream of water fall from the clouds above the forest instantly causing the fire to extinguish.

"What where the two of you doing?" She asked as she looked down at the pair. Her eyes drifted to the book of matches that James was still clutching as she gave her son a stern look. A moment later her eyes drifted to the forest behind their house once more. A large patch of it was now a burnt mess.

"We were just playing," James tried to explain in a small voice.

"With fire?" She questioned. She was normally the more lenient of their parents. It was rare that the boys truly upset her. Often she chalked their misbehavior up to them simply being children. Several times over the course of her being a mother she had talked her husband out of punishing one or both of her children. It was her normal nature. She did not anger easily. Today however, she could feel displeasure rushing through her body. She knew her sons well enough to know that had her husband been home they would have never pulled such a stunt. She felt taken advantage of and she did not care for it one bit. With nearly a week before Charles would return she instantly knew that if she did not make an impression on the two of them they would only misbehave again.

"With muggle fireworks," Sirius confessed in a pained voice. He could practically feel James' shock radiating off of his body. It was rare for Sirius to confess so quickly. "A friend from school gave them to me."

For the first time since seeing him she realized that Sirius was slightly hunched over and appeared to be in discomfort. "Are you hurt Love?" She asked in a gentle voice, her normal demeanor taking over for a moment.

Sirius opened his mouth to reply but James spoke before he had the chance. "I think he got burnt."

"There was an explosion," Sirius tried to explain. "Something hit my back and my elbow."

Gently she took his hand and turned him to the side. There was a large burn hole in the back of his coat and a small one near his elbow. The skin that was peeking through was scorched and angry looking. "Come on," she said in a soft voice, "Inside the both of you."

"We're real sorry mum," James said as he started walking towards the house. He could see a look in her eyes that he hadn't seen in a long time and it worried him. He would have liked to go back in time and never touch those bloody fireworks at all.

She ignored her son's apology; her attention focused on Sirius whose hand she was still holding. "Are you sure it didn't hit you anywhere else?"

Sirius nodded unable to find his voice. He was sure that they were in a world of trouble. He could feel the guilt circulating through his body. He had never managed to really make her angry before and the idea that he had done so now was enough to make him want to vomit.

"Mum really," James tried once more as he pulled open the back door. "We are really sorry. We didn't mean to."

"You accidentally played with fireworks?" She questioned as she held the door open for Sirius. Once the child was inside she followed him closing the door tightly behind them.

Sirius didn't miss the sternness of her voice. He would have liked to tell James to shut it. He was likely just making her more annoyed with his excuses.

"Well no," James admitted as the trio walked into the parlor. "They were supposed to be harmless. Just a colorful explosion, but one got stuck in a tree and –"

"Fire is never harmless," she scolded as she let go of Sirius' hand. Her eyes darted back and forth between the pair of them. "I would expect that at your age you would know that."

"No," James quick shook his head. "I mean we do but -"

"There is absolutely no excuse," she cut him off once more. "The two of you are lucky that you weren't injured more than Sirius was." She paused for a moment as she took a deep breath. Sirius couldn't help but think that she did so in order to get her temper under control. He hated himself for having a part in the cause of it. "Go to your room James," she said in an exasperated voice.

"But mum if you will just listen."

"I will listen when I come upstairs," she promised. Sirius noted that while her voice wasn't its normal gentle tone, she didn't sound nearly as angry as his own mum would have if she had sent him to his room and he had argued. His mother would have screamed until his ears rang and then sent his father after him with the cane.

"Go now," she insisted in the same even tone.

James stole a glance at his brother who gave him a pleading look.

Sirius was convinced that James' behavior was only making the whole situation worse.

Without saying another word, James turned on his heel and headed in the direction of the stairs.

Silence reigned until Sirius heard a door shut above them.

"Why don't you head into the study," she suggested. "I will get something for your wounds and we'll fix you right up."

Despite the fact that she was talking about healing him, Sirius could easily see that she was still plenty cross.

"Yes ma'am," he nodded before walking past her.

He wasted no time hurrying down the hallway to his dad's study.

Sirius turned the knob and pushed the door open. It wasn't often that he or James was punished in the study. Most of the time they were sent to their rooms, their father following them up moments later. The study came with rules that differed from a punishment in their rooms and even though she had never been the one to punish him, Sirius wasn't going to make things any worse by not following those rules.

He walked across the study and quickly put himself in the corner.

He absolutely hated standing in the corner. It made him feel roughly five years old, which didn't make much sense considering his own parents had never made him stand in the corner. They had been much more inclined to withhold meals and lock him in closets.

Sirius sighed softly as the toes of his right trainer pushed on the baseboard of the wall. There were already several scuff marks there from the same foot.

He heard the floorboard by the door creak loudly and quickly stood up a bit straighter.

"That really isn't necessary," she stated as she walked across the room.

She sat on the small couch by the large picture window.

Although Sirius had shifted his weight from one foot to the other, he hadn't moved from his position facing the wall.

"Sirius," she said softly. "Come here please."

He quickly turned around and without a moment of hesitation walked over to her. He was sure that his confusion was written all over his face. His dad would have been sitting in one of the straight back chairs in front of his desk. He would have been a mixture of stern and kind that Sirius sincerely hoped he could learn to master one day.

His mum was the complete opposite.

Despite having been furious only minutes earlier, now she just seemed sad.

She reached out and carefully helped him take off his coat. Even with her gentle touch Sirius winced as the material brushed over his burn marks.

"Turn around and let me see," she instructed.

She picked up a jar from beside her on the sofa. A moment later she had the lid off and a small amount of the yellow substance on her fingertips.

"This won't hurt a bit," she promised before gently rubbing it on his exposed elbow.

She watched as the burn slowly started to vanish. "Am I right to assume that you do not require a lecture on the dangers of playing with fire?"

"Yes ma'am," Sirius nodded. He suddenly felt consumed with guilt. A large lump had formed in his throat. He felt her carefully take hold of his arm and turn him a bit more and then he felt her fingers on the wound on his back.

"Mum?" He said in a voice just barely above a whisper.

"Hmm?" She mused softly.

"I'm real sorry," Sirius offered as he felt his tears rush to the surface and cling desperately to his eyelashes.

She remained silent as she continued to heal him. She watched as the skin on his back slowly returned to its normal state. Once again she turned his body this time turning him to face her. "I know," she replied in a sad voice.

"It was all my fault," Sirius continued blinking furiously as she leaned over and placed the jar of salve on the small end table. "I brought the fireworks home and I -"

"Held your wand at James and threatened to torture him if he didn't join you?"

Sirius shook his head. "No, but if I wouldn't have brought them home this would have never happened."

She gave him a small sad smile. Sirius often blamed himself for the mischief that her two boys tended to get into. She liked to force herself to believe that the boy was really just noble. However, in reality, she knew that his parents had often blamed him and allowed his younger brother Regulus to escape any punishment at all. They had completely brainwashed her sweet boy to believe that most things were entirely his fault. It made her sick to her stomach.

"Listen to me very carefully okay?" She paused until he nodded in agreement. "This is not solely your fault. While you should not have brought the fireworks home, James can make his own decisions. You are not responsible for your brother's behavior. You just aren't Love."

Sirius shrugged. He didn't trust himself to speak. He was sure that the moment he opened his mouth, his emotions would betray him and the tears would begin pouring from his eyes.

"Over the summer holiday when James was angry with your dad and I and he got himself into trouble for speaking so rudely, he was punished and you were not correct?"

Sirius nodded trying to make sense of why she was bringing up something that had happened months prior.

"Why weren't you?"

Sirius half shrugged. "I didn't do anything wrong." His voice was hoarse from holding back his tears.

"Exactly. That was no more your fault than today was," she replied. "James has an intelligent working brain all of his own. He knows the difference between right and wrong. He can make his own decisions."

Sirius was silent as he let her words wash over him. He wasn't used to a mother that spoke so kindly when she was angry. Had he confessed to his own mother that he had supplied the product responsible for the misbehavior she likely would have boxed his ears.

"That being said you are responsible for your own behavior and decisions," she continued. "In that regard you are far from innocent."

Sirius nodded in agreement. He wasn't about to argue with her or deny his behavior. He had known from the moment that he had brought the fireworks home that if he was caught he would be in trouble. He and James hadn't waited until they were home alone to set them off without good reason after all.

"I want to be perfectly clear as to why you are in trouble," she continued once more. He instantly noted that she was just as close to tears as he was. "You could have been killed Sirius. If the two of you didn't make it out of that forest..." She closed her eyes tightly and swallowed hard as she attempted to compose herself. "Well I can't imagine anything worse," she finally said.

The tears that Sirius had so determinedly kept from falling now ran down his face at a rapid pace. He couldn't believe that he had done something so foolish. Despite knowing it for some time now, he still couldn't believe that he had parents that cared whether he lived or died. "I'll get the slipper," he choked out the words through his tears.

She shook her head as she pulled him into a tight hug. Aside from smacking James' bum once when he was five, she had never physically disciplined her boys. She was well aware of how the corporal punishment in her house was carried out though. While she did not disapprove of her husband's use of the slipper, she did not feel as though it was necessary for her to employ it. The child in her arms was already a mess of tears and she hadn't laid so much as a finger on him. She knew that the simple act of her carrying out a punishment was likely enough.

"It's okay Love," she whispered softly. "We'll get through this."

A silent nod came as the reply.

Without giving her actions another thought she quickly and gently moved the boy to her side and guided him over her lap, his head and legs resting comfortably on the couch. She knew that if she had waited another second she would have changed her mind altogether. Doing so was not an option in her eyes. The stunt that the two of them had pulled had been far too dangerous. Aside from that, she could not allow them to misbehave simply because their father was away.

She looked down at the small jean clad backside. She knew that her husband likely would have removed any clothing that was blocking his target but again she did not feel that doing so was necessary. Sirius' despondent weeping had not declined in the least. The mere thought of making the situation any harder on either of them was enough to bring tears to her eyes.

Before she could talk herself out of it and before her apprehension caused Sirius to wait any longer she raised her hand and brought it down smartly on the small backside presenting itself.

She didn't lecture while she administered the spanking. She did not feel that doing so was necessary. Sirius knew why what he had done was wrong, further explanation was not needed.

Her hand fell for the tenth time before the same hand gently began rubbing the boy's back.

Sirius slowly slid his body down the couch until his head was resting on her lap, his face facing her abdomen.

She ran her fingers down the side of his face. "You are so very loved. You know that don't you?"

He nodded softly as he looked up at her face. "Yeah, I do."

"Never forget it," she replied. "Never doubt it either." She paused before running her hand down his face once more. "I hated every moment of that," she admitted. "Likely more than you did."

A small grin tugged at the corner of Sirius' lips despite the few stray tears that were still leaking from his eyes.

"Unfortunately I need to go speak with James now. Would you like to nap here or in your room?"

"Here," Sirius replied suddenly feeling far too tired to walk upstairs.

She nodded before helping him to stand so that she could move. A moment later his pillow and blanket appeared in the room.

Sirius quickly removed his trainers and allowed her to tuck him in.

She placed a gentle kiss on his forehead before softly ruffling his hair. "Sleep well Love," she whispered as his eyes closed.

She sighed softly as her thoughts went to her other child upstairs. She was sure that she would never understand how her husband managed to dole out two punishments when needed. She was sure that she would be in tears by the time she was done.

"Mum?" The small voice pulled her from her thoughts.

She looked down at the child that she had grown to love as her own.

"I love you."

"I love you so very much," she whispered. "More than you'll ever know."