Based on the deleted scene that should not have been deleted. If you haven't seen the deleted scenes then go and watch. Maybe do it when you don't have to be around people after.
So this is Regina, Regal Believer, OQ and lots of other stuff thrown in. I don't do the scene justice but I couldn't not write what I am sure to be one of many.
I don't own the characters or the show. Mistakes are my own.
Enjoy and tell me what you think please :D
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Choices. Sometimes in life we get a choice, a choice on whether to do the right thing. A chance to shape our future. Sometimes that choice is made for us and we are led down that path. Other times we don't recognise the choice at all, the decision so natural. Whilst some choices are impossible. They force us to choose between the things we love and value the most. Regina had faced more of these choices than she would ever admit. As she walked towards the end of the jetty, trying (and failing) to compose herself she wondered if this was the right one.
She turned towards her family, the ones she'd come to protect- the pirate still missing. Her heart was breaking, she'd finally found them, was finally beginning to feel like just maybe she could fit into this messed up world, now she was leaving them, and their lives to the fate of gods. Not just any god. Hades. God of the underworld. The master of death. She saw their smiles, their genuine happiness, and it shattered her a bit more. There was once a time when leaving them to die would not have been an issue for her. Yes she realised how harsh that sounded- it was the truth, she had tried to kill them because they were a threat to the world she'd built. To protect her heart. We don't love through our hearts though, we love through our souls. Somehow the Uncharmings, Miss Swan, and their pirate mascot had wormed her way into her soul.
"You know I don't want to leave you" her voice breaking with emotion
Her daughter, her friend, the eternally, and nauseatingly sweet Snow smiled "Which tells us exactly how far you've come" she offered, hugging her tight.
Emma hugged Henry, neither of them saying anything. No words describe mother's tears. Thirty Years ago Emma gave up her baby for adoption, to give the bundle of joy his best chance, one she couldn't give him. She never expected to get to know him, to love him as she did. She didn't expect to count his adoptive mother as a friend, a mentor, a confidant. Yet here they were. Standing on the shores of hell, letting him go again. It was his best chance. She was determined to return, but part of her felt better knowing that whatever happened her son would be safe.
Emma offered a sad smile, "Go. Be safe. We'll be okay" It didn't comfort her not really.
"Are you sure" she looked at all of them, every second it became harder to leave.
It was Charming that answered this time "We're sure. Cora's threat to your father can't be ignored. We understand".
Her father. The person she betrayed all those years ago. She couldn't condemn him again.
"Don't worry about us, we'll be home before you know it" Coming from the eternal optimist those words should have been reassuring; instead they sounded fake and contrite.
Home. Is that really one place. Or is it the people.
She turned to Rumpelstiltskin, who had been unusually quiet "What about you, Are you coming?"
He offered a polite smile, one which usually meant he was up to something "No, it appears I promised to rescue a pirate, and I always honour my agreements."
Regina didn't have the energy to question the Crocodile's agenda. Not today.
She offered a curt nod. A small smile. There were words left unsaid. Goodbyes left unheard. It wasn't goodbye. It was we'll meet again. No one knew when. But perhaps they'd meet again. Some sunny day.
She turned, with Robin and Henry on her sides, towards the end of the jetty once more, not turning around. She didn't see Emma reach for her son, for possibly the last time. She didn't see the sad smiles on Snow or Charming's face.
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Henry was the one to break the silence. Her strong, brave boy.
"It's okay. I get it"
He always understood. He always somehow knew, knew her heart better than she did. Knew how to make her smile and laugh, knew how to comfort her. Hearing his voice now. She didn't hear her son, her little prince. She was reminded of another time when she faced an impossible decision between family and love.
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She saw her father standing there, asking what was wrong. Telling her that power was seductive, that so was love. That she could be happy again. That she wasn't nothing. He gave her a choice. She remembers hugging him, feeling that childlike comfort of a fathers hold. A tear escaping, the only thing in her life that was free. She knew then what the decision had to be. If she wanted to be free she had to do this, no matter how much it broke her. She looked into his eyes. She didn't see disappointment, nor fear just love. Love for a daughter that had to grow up to quickly. Love for a daughter the world had cast as evil. She ripped out his heart, destroying what was left of hers with it.
Regina was bought out of the memory by her sons voice again "Your dad was the only person you ever loved." She loved Daniel too she thought, but it wasn't the same. Her daddy was someone she had always loved throughout everything. Yet she still killed him.
"Henry what I did I can never make up for" Nothing ever could. She had replayed that decision over and over again. Sometimes she would chose differently. Sometimes exactly the same. She shuddered.
"But this is a start". He still had hope. He still believed in her. She was going to break down. Her son was too good for her, how had she ended up with him.
She turned to face her son; she had him because she cast the curse. The curse that cost her father's heart, her father's life.
"Is that why you named me Henry?"
Given the context of the situation she shouldn't have been shocked by the question, somehow she still was, or maybe it was the childlike innocence in which it was asked. Like it was a simple decision.
There had never been another name for him. It was always going to be Henry. The very idea of him captured her heart. The tantrums and the crying tested her; she truly didn't think she could do it, but the smiles and the way he reached for her melted her heart. The way he had.
"To try and make things better?" if the first question wasn't a surprise then this one certainly was.
She smiled, genuinely before answering. "It wasn't about me, it was never about me. It was about him. My papa. He was the first person in my life to give me hope. Hope that things can get better. That I could be happy. "Her voice was stronger now. It was him; her papa had made her strong.
"And then…" Her voice broke; she bowed her head in shame. She saw Robin shuffle closer, it was oddly comforting "It went away" her voice no more than a whisper.
Henry frowned. His mom was usually so strong. So composed. The woman he saw before him was vulnerable, scared, a little girl, an orphan and it made him realise how strong she truly was. To love through all the pain and the heartache. To keep fighting, not her enemies but her self-doubts, her demons. Her biggest regret.
She took a deep breath and a step towards him, holding his shoulders, to reassure herself that he was really there, that this wasn't' t another cruel trick of fate.
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Robin turned away. To give the family some space. He knew Henry was Regina's world. He knew how powerful the bond between a parent and child could be. For the first time he fully understood why Regina had been so devastated that night in the enchanted forest. Why she had every intention of putting herself under the sleeping curse. History had repeated itself. She had lost the two people that gave her hope. That convinced her that things might someday work out.
"So the first Henry was just like me. He believed in you too"
Regina couldn't speak. It was true. Her son's heart and papas were one and the same. No one managed to fill her with such joy. With such happiness. With so much hope.
She had made a decision long ago where she chose power over love and family. Looking at the boat she made up her mind She would be damned if she chose the same thing again.
Her voice resigned to fate "We're not going"
Robin couldn't help but be confused. "What?"
"This is what my mother wants. She always forced me to do what she thought best. She gave me two options. Stay and damn my father to eternal suffering or leave and abandon my friends and family. "
"Well I'm creating a third option. One where I can do it all. Where I can be the hero I have to be. Where hope can win"
Not not have. She wanted to be the hero. What Regina wants she gets.
She held each of their arms. The fire in her eyes turning to a shimmer of love and admiration "We're helping Emma. We are helping my new family. "
Family. It's about more than just blood. It's about the bond you share. The fierce protective nature that is always there. That fire in your soul. That beating in your heart. The people who are there for you no matter what.
Regina thought she had to choose between her father and her new family. That was never the choice, the choice was whether she could believe in herself or let her mother's doubts creep in once again.
She would always hate herself for killing her father, but she had finally found her family. He was right, power was seductive but so was love.
Trust your heart. Let fate decide. It was up to the Gods now.
Thanks for reading and please tell me what you thought.