A one shot set in/after Indefensible. A little stuck with Surgeons and Shiraz at the moment, so trying to prompt myself with some little one shots. Hope you enjoy!
Bernie watched Serena go, her heart hammering in her chest as the brunette looked back one more time as the door between them slowly closed. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she took a deep breath. She knew what she had to do. Turning back to face the ward, heavy steps took her to her son's bedside.
"Cam?"
He looked up his mother, saw the tears gathering in her eyes.
"You know I can't lie. I want to protect to and I want to respect your choice, but this is bigger than just you. Keeley's injuries make it clear what happened, no one can hide that." She bowed her head, not wanting to see her son's face as she braced for the anger that would surely come.
"I know," came the quiet reply, causing her to snap her head up. There were tears in Cameron's eyes too.
She reached forward, taking her son's hands in her own. Her voice trembled as she spoke. "You want to protect, and I can understand that. Really I can, but there's no running from this for anyone."
He nodded in understanding, looking across to where Keeley lay in the bed opposite, dosing under the influence of the painkillers she had been administered. "Can I have some time to talk to Keeley first?"
Bernie followed his gaze. "Of course," she breathed. "I'll speak to the police and tell them to wait in my office. You can speak to them in there. If Keeley is feeling up to it, she can speak to them after that. If not, I'll advise they come back tomorrow."
Watching Cameron through the blinds of her office, Serena couldn't help but be proud of her son. Turning, she took a deep breath as she approached Keeley, her former colleague and friend, and now so much more to her son.
"He wanted to protect you, and tried his best to, you have to know that" said Bernie, glancing back towards her office.
Keeley nodded. "I know," she sighed. "I should never have asked him to lie. Especially not to you. I'm old enough to know what I did was stupid, Bernie."
The army medic found she had no response.
"Lying here, watching him try to cover for me, for what I did…" She shook her head. "What I did was beyond stupid and put a lot of lives in danger. It's time for me to face the music." She looked over to where Cameron had just exited his mother's office, flanked by the police officers. She reached out, placing a hand on Bernie's arm. "He's an amazing young man."
The blonde nodded. "I'm realising that."
Serena rolled her eyes as Jason provided yet another early answer to his new favourite quiz show, criticising the contestants for their failure to find the correct answer. Since leaving the hospital she had been blowing hot and cold; her mood alternating between being absolutely livid with the infuriating trauma specialist for taking her for granted, for lying to her and wallowing in her own self pity that once again the emotionally backward blonde failed to realise the lengths Serena would go to protect her.
On her second glass of wine, she was dwelling in a state towards the miserable end of her emotional spectrum when the doorbell sounded unexpectedly, causing her to jump. "I'll get it," she said to Jason as she stood, wondering who the hell could be at her door, silently praying she wasn't about to be guilt tripped by some poor soul collecting for charity.
Yanking open the door, wine glass still in hand, she was shocked to find none other than the current object of her thoughts standing outside, moving from foot to foot nervously as she toyed with the strap of her bag.
"Hi," came the hesitant greeting.
"Bernie? What on earth are you-"
"I don't want to lie to you anymore," blurted the blonde, cutting her off.
Serena let her eyes take in the woman before her, set slightly on edge by her unusually nervous demeanour and slightly desperate edge to her tone. "Is this a doorstep conversation?"
"It's a conversation I need to have before I lose my nerve," admitted Bernie.
The statement did nothing to settle Serena, who put a gentle hand on the rather traumatised looking trauma specialist and leading her inside. As they passed the living room, she poked her head around the door. "Jason, Major Wolfe and I will just be in the kitchen, okay?"
He nodded, not bothering to reply, his attention firmly set on the television.
Entering the kitchen, she let her hand slip from Bernie's arm, fetching the wine from the fridge and a spare glass. She placed it on the table before the blonde, who say hunched uncomfortably on the edge of the chair. Taking the seat closest to her friend, Serena made to pour, only to have Bernie put her hand on the bottle, halting her.
"Maybe after."
Putting the bottle down, Serena frowned. Bernie never said no to a drink.
"There are some things I need to say first." She took a deep breath, her gaze remaining firmly on her own fidgeting hands in her lap. "I spoke to the police today, after you'd left. Told them everything. Cam did too. He knows he couldn't cover for Keeley forever, and she understands she has to take responsibility for her actions. I told the police you had no idea until the surgery, when you say the injuries and they've said that they won't need to speak to you further."
Serena merely nodded, not wanting to interrupt, knowing somehow, that Bernie hadn't said all she had to say.
With her head still bent, and her gaze anywhere but the brunette to her left, the blonde pushed on. "I hate that I made you feel like I don't appreciate you, because I do. If it weren't for you I would have fallen apart a long time ago…"
Having to force herself not to reach out and try to comfort Bernie as her breath hitched and voice trembled, Serena wrapped both hands around her wine glass. It had become second nature to reach out and touch the woman next to her, especially when she turned to look up at her through her fringe, unshed tears in her eyes.
"You are the person who has picked me back up and held me together." She paused, swallowing the lump in her throat. "And I love you for it."
Serena gasped, almost knocking her wine glass over the table. Had she heard correctly? "You love me?"
Bernie let out a watery chuckle. "For what it's worth, yes."
"So when you said you didn't want today to affect 'us'?" breathed the brunette, turning to fully face the blonde.
"A slip of the tongue on my part, perhaps," shrugged Bernie, looking defeated. "But yes. I don't want today to affect 'us', whatever 'us' there is." She looked away, her eyes landing on the wine bottle on the table. God she needed a drink. "I'm not a stupid little girl, Serena. I understand if this is the last thing you want to hear and if you'd rather, I won't say another word on it. All I ask, if you allow it, is that we remain friends." She tried to ignore the tears rolling down her cheeks. "I'm not really sure what I'd do without you if I'm honest." She hated the way her voice hitched, its pitch unusually high and strangled.
Serena reached for her friends trembling hands, waiting until she finally met her gaze. "I'd like for there to be an 'us'," she said, almost in a whisper. "And I don't know where that might lead, but I think we could have fun finding out." She watched as Bernie wiped the tears from her eyes with the back of her hand. Before her, the blonde practically uncoiled, the tension leaving her shoulders as she breathed a deep sigh of relief.
Pushing her chair out, Serena, stood, opening her arms to the other woman. "Come here."
Bernie let herself be pulled into a tight hug, burying her face into the brunette's neck, grateful for the physical comfort that had become second nature to them. As her heartbeat and breathing settled back to their normal rates, she pulled back, reaching up to her fingers trace across Serena's cheek. "Would it be too much too soon for me to say you're beautiful."
The words were said with such sincerity that Serena couldn't help but melt. Ignoring the blush blooming on her cheeks, she replied without missing a beat. "Only if you have a suitable description ready for when I don't look like I've had a horrendously long day and am half a bottle down."
"Oh, I'm sure I can come up with something," grinned Bernie. "Thank you," she added quietly after a few moments, her eyes flitting over the brunette's face.
"What for this time?" chuckled Serena.
"Not shooting me down, even though you probably should," admitted the blonde.
The brunette couldn't help but laugh. "You may be a disaster, but you are rather an attractive one, it must be said." She leant in to place a gentle kiss to soft pink lips. "And I've known you this long without murdering you, even if the urge has been rather strong at times!"
"Oh, shut up!" grinned Bernie, enthusiastically reciprocating the kiss from the brunette only a few moments ago.
"Aunty Serena?"
The pair spring apart at the sound of Jason's voice, Bernie with a rather undignified squeal.
"Can I watch another episode?" he asked, seemingly ignoring the scene before him.
"What?" Serena asked, trying to force her brain to engage. "Yes! Yes, of course, Jason."
He hesitated for a moment, looking between them both. "Is this why you wanted to talk to me about girlfriends?"
Bernie stifled a laugh, glad it was Serena in the firing line, and also rather keen to hear her answer.
"No, not entirely," admitted Serena. "But everything I said does apply, I suppose."
Jason nodded, taking on board this information before moving his gaze to Bernie. "Major Wolfe, would you like to watch Only Connect with me?"
"Jason, Ms Wolfe and I-"
"But Aunty Serena, you said that when someone dates someone new, people should try to make them feel welcome because it can be a scary time," said Jason, cutting his Aunt off. "You said you would be nice to any girlfriends I have, so I'm being nice back."
And there is was, thought the brunette. The reason why as however exasperated Jason could make her, he was precious in his pureness. His innocence. He drove her round the bend at times, yes, but she loved him for it and wouldn't have him any other way.
"I would love to, Jason," said Bernie from her left, a broad smile on her face.
He smiled back. "I'll go and get it ready."
"And I'll be there in a moment." The blonde turned to Serena. "What have I just agreed to?"
Bernie hadn't been sure of what Jason, or indeed Serena would deem as suitable quiz show watching etiquette after their recent revelations, and had originally sat primly on the edge of the sofa. The brunette had joined her, also having brought the wine from the kitchen, and had settled into the deep sofa cushions. A few moments later she had leant forward, wrapping an arm around Bernie's waist, dragging her back to nestle against her.
"Don't feel bad if you can't answer many of the questions," said Jason as he hit play. "Neither can Aunty Serena."
The blonde stifled a giggle at Jason's matter of fact tone.
"Just you wait. I bet you struggle to answer them too!" came the brunette's quiet reply in her ear.
It was the beginning of a series of whispered exchanges between the pair as the show continued. They were scolded by Jason on a number of occasions for being rather too loud and not paying attention to the show.
"Even Aunty Serena can get some of these ones," announced Jason as the final round the show rolled around.
"Oh, she can, can she?" laughed Bernie. "Bet I can get more!" she challenged, unable to stop her competitive side coming out.
What ensued was the picture of domestic contentment, as the three occupant of the room fought to answer the most questions correctly and while Bernie put in a respectable effort, Jason beat her easily. She was almost touched as the credits rolled and Jason informed her she was good competition and he hoped they could watch more quiz shows together.
The comment was not lost on Serena either, who was happily curled in the corner of the sofa, her legs draped over Bernie's, both surprised and elated that the blonde fitted quite so comfortably into her life and her home.
Jason having excused himself to bed at ten sharp, as was his habit, the pair were left to their own company once again as they relaxed and finished the bottle of wine Serena had opened earlier. With Jason gone, Bernie had comfortably settled even closer to the brunette.
"So, have we scared you off yet?" asked Serena with a chuckle.
Bernie raised an eyebrow. "Are you kidding? You were at work today? You saw the mess of my family life. It's me who should be worried about scaring you off!" She let out a long breath, a smile playing on her lips. "Tonight, initial terrifying moments aside, was actually really rather nice."
"Were you really so terrified?" asked Serena, moving so she could face her friend properly.
Bernie bit her lip as she formulated her response. "Is it so hard to believe? You are not someone I want to lose, Serena. I was terrified I had read things wrongly, that you'd think I was some sort of horrid creep coming onto you and you'd never want to see me again."
Serena smiled gently, her hand rubbing soothingly along Bernie's upper arm. She wasn't about to lose the blonde either. "I see I could have been less subtle in my hints?" she smirked, laughing when Bernie turned to look at her sharply eyebrows having risen high enough to be hidden by her fringe.
"You'd been hinting?"
"And you'd been blind!" the brunette chuckled. "Who else do I offer back rubs to and cosy up with at the nurses station?"
Bernie let out a long breath as she thought back over their recent interactions, wondering just how much she'd missed. "And here I thought I was overstepping the mark when I left you that welcome back present…"
"Jason was right…you really don't move very quickly, do you?" teased Serena, raising an eyebrow as Bernie suddenly plucked her wine glass from her hand before placing it on the table with her own before manoeuvring herself to straddle Serena on the sofa.
"Oh, I can move quickly when I want to," she teased, her fingers teasing under the hem of Serena's shirt. "I'm just waiting for the green light."
Enjoying the weight of the blonde on her, Serena let her hands settle on absurdly toned thighs. "Well I may have set my traffic light red for Shiraz, but please, by all means consider it green and all systems go for you."