Everybody Loves Raymond

Season 10, Episode 3

"Arrival"

Written by: Robert

Harley walked through the door to a blinding light. "Sheesh. Can ya turn down the lights?" She asked. Slowly her eyes adjusted and she looked around. There were clouds everywhere. The ground felt soft as she walked. "Huh… where the h-" She was interrupted by a voice.

"Harley?" The voice asked.

"Ray?" She asked.

"Uhh. Yeah?" He replied.

"Ray! Where are ya!?" Harley asked, excited.

"I'm over here." Ray said, waving.

Harley started running to him. She quickly pounced Ray and gave him a tight hug. "I've been lookin' for ya! Judy shot me in the face!"

Ray looked confused. "Wha?"

"Yeah! Right in the face! She took a shotgun and then BANG! Right in the kisser!" Harley giggled. "So let's get outta here!"

"That's all good, Harley, but… how?" Ray asked.

"Easy! All we gotta do is… wait… I forgot to ask Master Yoda how to get back home!" Harley groaned.

They stood up and started walking together. "Well, I'm sure there's somebody that can give us directions or somethin'." Ray said, rubbing his neck as they walked.

Harley and Ray walked past a young girl who was sitting on a cloud with a phone. "Hey, guys." She said as they passed.

"Hey, Kim." Harley said, then continued walking.

Harley walked up to a man dressed like a police officer, but with wings.

"Hey, birdy. How do we get outta here?" Harley asked him.

"Excuse me?" He asked.

"You know. Leave? We don't wanna stay." Harley said.

"You don't leave." He said, looking confused.

"But we wanna." Harley pouted.

"No. You don't leave." The officer said, glaring.

"Yes, we do!" Harley shouted and pounced the officer, giving him a few punches to the mouth. "Answer me! How do we get outta here?!" She squealed into his face.

"HFIL! The leader of HFIL! Ask about the escape hatch!" He shouted. "Stop punching me, you crazy lady!"

Harley gave him a smile. "Thanks!" She climbed off of him and dusted herself off. "Come on, Ray! We gotta go to HFIL!" She grabbed his hand and guided him back to the door.

They walked through the door back into the Punisher's office. Frank Castle glanced behind him.

"Why are you here again?" He asked, there was a thick folder on his desk.

"We need to use an escape hatch or whatever! Then we can go home!" Harley smiled, walking to Frank. "Frankie? You okay?" She asked.

The Punisher sat motionless, staring down at the folder. "You've done so much… I had no idea." He said.

"Huh? What do ya mean?" Harley asked, then noticed the folder. There were various reports on every horrible thing Harley did in her past. All the way up to when she beat up the officer a few moments ago.

"Oh… look, Frankie. Just… let us use that hatch and we'll be gone!" She said.

"You're not going anywhere. You truly deserve to be here…" He glanced back to her. "He can go. I put him here and he didn't deserve it." The Punisher pointed to Ray. "But you… you're staying."

Harley was in shock. "I thought we were friends." She said, glancing to the hatch under the Punisher's desk.

"We were never friends." The Punisher stood up, towering over Harley. "But now you've given me a reason to punish you. Forever."

"Okay… Ray. Go through the hatch." She told Ray.

"Uhh, yeah, sure." Ray said, opening the hatch under the desk and he dropped through. And just like that, he was gone.

Harley took a few steps back. "Ya don't have to do this, Frankie." She said; her face slowly turning into a glare.

"It's my job." He said, emotionless.

Harley sighed, but then smirked. "You're fired." She said, then gave him a quick kick to the face, knocking him onto the floor. The Punisher wiped some blood from his lip and then threw a hard punch to Harley's stomach, knocking the wind out of her. He wrapped his hands around her neck and then tossed her into the wall. She grunted and fell down.

"That all ya got?" Harley smirked. The Punisher's expression remained the same. Cold and unfeeling. He ran at her, but she rolled out of the way, kicking his legs with her own. He fell onto his knees and she gave him several quick punches to his face. Her hands were starting to hurt from the force of her own punches. He struggled back to his feet and punched her in the face, knocking her over. She had broken his nose after the flurry of punches. "That all ya got?" He asked her, snapping his nose back into place. Harley glanced to the desk, but before she could move, he kicked her stomach. "You ain't keepin' me from Ray." She said, coughing, a few spots of blood on the floor.

The Punisher grabbed her by her hair and dragged her to the desk. "You're never going back. Look. Look at what you've done." He said, slamming her face into the thick folder, papers flying. Harley didn't bother looking at her past. "Do ya think this moment's gonna show up in there?" She smirked before kicking The Punisher between the legs. He groaned in pain, lifting her and slamming her to the floor with a thud.

"Sorry, but I don't play fair." She giggled.

"Neither do I." He said, kicking her back. She squealed and rolled around on the floor in pain.

Harley groaned, struggling back to her feet before she fell down fist first into the Punisher's face. All of her weight was in that punch. The Punisher spit out a tooth and glared at her. She stood back up and kicked him in the side of the head. Panting hard, Harley looked down at him. "I'm goin'…" She struggled the words out.

The Punisher started to move again. Harley looked surprised. "No… you don't deserve freedom." He weakly got up onto his knees. "I deserve to be here. But you're a monster." He spit blood out onto the floor. Before he could stand, Harley punched him in the face again, knocking him down. "Just say down, Frank." She panted. He put his hands on the floor and tried to push himself back up. She grunted and kicked him in the ribs. He fell flat. "I won." Harley said, turning around and walking to the hatch.

"You know… this isn't the last time we've seen each other." He said. He could barely move.

Harley knelt down, opening the hatch. She climbed down the ladder. "I know." She said before closing it back.