AN: (Is skip-able. Importance is Underlined)

Muse: So you know what would be fun? /Me: No./ Muse: Another crossdressing fic. /Me: No!/ Muse: And you know how you've been into Undertale- /Me: NO./ Muse: It's Not the weirdest thing you've seen done- /Me: NO!/ Muse: You're dying to write again. /Me: I don't have time for this! THE NEW SEMESTER'S STARTING./ Muse: IT CAN BE A ONESHOT /Me: .../ Muse: ... You have 2 more weeks left. /Me: URGH, FINE

So, I'm pretty sure I have a slight obsession with crossdressing stories (considering this is technically my 3rd one, just the first for Undertale), and truthfully I've had several ideas for UT fics, but considering my Very Bad track record for updating/keeping my muse, I chose to write this idea since was only a oneshot (and with the new semester it's all I can afford to do right now).

Also, since this isn't the oddest idea I've come across for this fandom, I'm braving posting this. Frisk is gender-neutral. This is before Asgore's boss fight - when he gives you a chance to go say goodbye to your friends; Frisk took it. And I'm Not good at puns, I apologize. ...Enjoy ^^"

Frisk was given the option to spend some time with her friends and say goodbye, before having to fight King Asgore; they took that opportunity. Despite being confident that they could work it out peacefully, without resorting to violence, they still decided to spend some time with their new friends from the Underground, just in case.

That's how Frisk found them-self at the home of Snowdin's infamous skeleton brothers, trying to help Papyrus make dinner; meaning trying to subtly give the tall skeleton advice, and usually having to repeat it multiple times to get him to hear them.

After Papyrus conceded to turning down the heat – "cooking is so much fun, Pap. I bet if you turned down the heat it would last longer" – Frisk tried to distract him with a question about their new couch.

"OH YES, IT IS A GREAT NEW COUCH, ISN'T IT? SANS HAS BEEN SAVING MONEY AND BOUGHT IT TO REPLACE THE OLD, LUMPY ONE. NOT EVEN YOU FINDING 30G IN THERE MANAGED TO SOFTEN IT, SO SANS SAID IT WAS TIME FOR IT TO GO."

Frisk smiled slightly at the memory of finding the currency in between the cushions, and Papyrus allowing them to keep it.

"Really? He must have been saving for a long time, last I checked couches were kind of expensive, especially the nice ones," Frisk said.

"WELL," Papyrus considered, "SANS DOES HAVE MORE JOBS THAN HIS SENTRY STATION. AND I HELP OUT AS WELL WITH MY OWN SENTRY POST AND PART-TIME-ROYAL-GUARD-IN-TRAINING JOB, NYEH HEH HEH-"

Frisk rolled their eyes discretely.

"BUT HE ALSO WORKS A HOT DOG STAND, DOES COMEDY ROUTINES, A LOT OF ENTREPRENEUR WORK-"

Frisk couldn't help but remember the "fried snow" idea, and him selling tickets to Shyren's and their "concert".

"AND, SOMETHING ELSE… HMM." The skeleton paused for a moment, trying to remember something. "I DON'T REMEMBER WHAT JOB IT IS, SPECIFICALLY, BUT SOMETIMES SANS WORKS ON THE ODD WEEKEND FOR MUFFET."

Frisk raised an eyebrow, wondering what the shorter skeleton could be doing for Muffet.

"YOU KNOW, HE'S NEVER ACTUALLY TOLD ME WHAT HE DOES FOR HER. EVERY TIME I ASK HE JUST KEEPS MAKING PUNS AND GETTING ME FRUSTRATED!" He yelled.

Frisk tried to contain their laughter, picturing the scene in their head; Sans just loved to rile his brother up, and it was funny to watch. Frisk shook their head though, not wanting to upset their friend (who most definitely wasn't pouting at the revelation…), and patted his arm.

Speaking of the other skeleton; they both heard the sound of the front door opening and closing. The two peeked out from the kitchen to see Sans walk over to the couch and fall face-first into the cushions. "what a day," he said, voice slightly muffled.

Frisk and Papyrus walked over to him. "Long day?" Frisk started off, not wanting to ask right away.

"very," Sans said. "I am dog-tired." Remembering that Pap said he was working the hot dog stand that day, Frisk shook their head with a smile while Papyrus groaned.

Less patient, Papyrus asked about what he and Frisk were wondering, "SANS, AS FRISK WAS ASKING ABOUT OUR NEW COUCH, AND THE CONVERSATION MOVING TO OUR JOBS, IT HAS OCCURRED TO ME THAT YOU NEVER DID TELL ME WHAT YOU DO FOR MUFFET ON THE RARE TIMES YOU WORK FOR HER. SO WHAT EXACTLY DO YOU DO?"

Sans didn't answer at first and Frisk wondered if he had fallen asleep (they'd seen him sleeping in the most random places, so it wouldn't surprise them), but he suddenly lifted his head.

"there's not much to say, really. the job just bugs me-"

"SANS," Papyrus groaned.

"so I don't like to talk about it. I will tell you that being around those pastries all day is a pretty sweet deal though-"

"SANS!"

"and it's batter than not having a job… though sometimes it can be a bit… tuffet."

Papyrus finally had enough and stormed back into the kitchen. Sans just laughed at his outburst, his grin looking more relaxed. Then he turned his attention to Frisk, who, despite the amused smile, had their arms crossed in defiance; not easily as swayed as Papyrus.

Knowing this, the two stared somewhat awkwardly at each other, until Frisk broke the silence, hoping a less direct question would yield better results: "So are you allowed to eat any of the spider pastries?"

Sans blinked for a second, then chuckled. "nice try, kid. but fishing for information from me isn't going to be that easy."

Frisk pouted slightly, wondering how to get Sans to give them an answer before Papyrus yelled for Frisk in the kitchen, "HUMAN, I KNOW YOU SAID THIS GARLIC BREAD IS SUPPOSED TO BE A GOLDEN BROWN, BUT ARE YOU SURE THAT A DARKER BROWN WOULDN'T BE MORE SUPERIOR?"

Frisk gasped, and ran into the kitchen to make sure Papyrus didn't burn the bread that had taken twenty minutes to convince him to make (and the correct way).

As they left, Sans breathed a silent sigh of relief.

Several days later, Frisk was once again spending time with Papyrus (a day with Undyne really made them miss the skeleton). They were walking through waterfall, Papyrus talking about his experiences with Undyne's training, after Frisk mentioned that Undyne choose training to be their "Besties activity," the day before.

"I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW UNDYNE COULD JUGGLE, LET ALONE THREE MONSTERS… ONE OF THEM BEING ME!"

Frisk laughed, about to ask Papyrus if he was more on the light side (since he was seemingly just bones), or heavier (since those bones were made of magic), when they spotted an out-of-place flyer on the wall. Curious, they walked over and read it.

Muffet's 32nd Fashion Show and Spider Bake Sale!

Buy delectable spider sweets, where proceeds go to Actual spiders, as you watch monsters model the latest, beautiful fashions designed by Muffet, herself.

This Saturday at 7pm. Tickets on sale now for 100G! Or 150G at the door.

Frisk motioned for Papyrus to come over and read the flyer. "I didn't know Muffet designed clothes," they said.

"OH YES, HUMAN. IT IS HER SECONDARY BUSINESS, THOUGH NOT AS POPULAR AS HER BAKE SALES. I HEARD THAT MOST MONSTERS FIND HER CLOTHING TO BE 'TOO CUTE AND EXPENSIVE' FOR EVERYDAY WEAR. AND THAT SHE MAKES MOSTLY FEMALE CLOTHING, ESPECIALLY DRESSES; MUCH TOO LIMITED. THAT'S WHY I WEAR MY BATTLE BODY – IT'S FOR EVERYDAY WEAR, AND GREAT FOR BOTH GENDERS. NYEH HEH HEH!"

They smiled and agreed with him, before turning back to the flyer again. A fashion show normally wouldn't be something they'd prefer to attend (especially for that outrageous price), since they had their own style, but with their mission to fight Asgore approaching, this might be their only chance to see it; and there were going to be delicious spider-sweets…

This Saturday at 7pm. Isn't that tonight? Frisk paused. Wait, didn't Pap say that Sans was working for Muffet tonight? They asked their friend.

"YES HE IS, HUMAN. WHY DO YOU ASK?"

They pointed to the date on the sign. "This says the event is taking place on Saturday night, that's tonight. Do you think he helps the spiders bake for these large events?"

Frisk remembered Papyrus's story about Sans making a "fruity quiche," that they were pretty sure was actually a pie… So he's probably able to bake, Frisk thought to themselves. Could this be his job for Muffet?

They relayed their thoughts to Papyrus. He gasped with excitement.

"THAT MUST BE IT! HE MUST BE EMBARRASSED THAT HE WANTED TO LEARN TO COOK AS WELL AS THE GREAT PAPYRUS, SO HE COOKS SECRETLY. YES, THAT HAS TO BE IT!"

Frisk asked him if he wanted to attend the fashion show with them tonight. "Maybe we can find Sans while we're there, and show him we figured it out. Then we could confront him; why keep it a secret?"

"THAT SOUNDS BRILLIANT, I'D LOVE TO GO OUT WITH YOU TONIGHT… PLATONICALLY OF COURSE," he sweat-dropped.

Frisk wasn't sure what they had been expecting when they walked into Muffet's territory, but they were surprised by how much smaller it looked with an audience of chairs facing a portable stage with an add-on cat walk, taking up one side of the room. The other side had several long tables spread out with her classic confections. Little spiders, wearing tiny bow ties, were constantly coming in and out of an almost-unnoticeable door, carrying one or two pastries each, and restocking the tables or going around and selling them to specific monsters.

The sticky mass of webbing on the floor had been cleaned up, and only thinner webbing, which hung like decorations on the walls, remained. The room was all around brighter and more cheerful. They thought it was very different from the creepy atmosphere they had first encountered in Muffet's area.

Frisk and Papyrus walked around a bit awkwardly, buying a random donut or cookie (which you have to pay for separately from the ticket, Frisk grumbled internally) to take up some time.

"Do you see him anywhere, Pap?" Frisk asked the taller skeleton, who could perhaps see better than them, over the number of monsters present.

"NOT YET. BUT WORRY NOT, I AM CONFIDENT THAT WE WILL FIND HIM EVENTUALLY," he assured them.

Frisk 'hmmed' and looked around, eyes resting on the purple door which had a sign that read "Spiders Staff Only." They pointed out the door and asked, "Do you think that's the kitchen? And maybe that's where Sans is?"

"WELL," Papyrus considered, "IT COULD BE THE KITCHEN. AND SINCE THE KITCHEN IS USUALLY WHERE I MAKE MY BEST DISHES, SANS PROBABLY COOKS IN THERE TOO. SO IT'S VERY LIKELY. I GUESS WE'LL JUST HAVE TO WAIT FOR HIM TO COME OUT…"

Frisk thought for a moment before calling one of the little spiders over to them. They asked about Sans as they bought a cinnamon roll from it.

"Sorry to bother you little friend, but do you know if Sans the skeleton works here tonight?"

The spider actually managed to look surprised – Frisk wasn't entirely sure how, but thought that maybe it was because they weren't normal spiders, but monster-spiders (they could bake after all, would facial expressions really be that far off the mark) – before it nodded. Frisk grinned, it appeared their guess was correct.

"Do you know when he comes out? Me and his brother would really like to talk to him," they continued.

The little spider tilted its head in thought, then glanced to a clock on the wall. It gestured one of its legs at the clock and made a small arc. Frisk was confused but trying to think it though; the small arc could be part of a circle… the clock's circle… part of an hour! It looks like its maybe a quarter of a circle, so a quarter of an hour?

"15 minutes…?" Frisk asked it, feeling a bit silly.

The spider, however, nodded, cheerfully bobbing up and down in excitement.

"Alright!" Frisk was ecstatic. "Thank you so much for your help!"

The tiny spider nodded and waved goodbye, going back to its duties.

Papyrus, who had been watching, cheered along with Frisk.

"GOOD WORK, HUMAN! AT THIS RATE WE'LL FIND SANS IN NO TIME… BUT NOW WHAT CAN WE DO FOR 15 MORE MINUTES?"

Before they could reply, Muffet's voice rang from on stage, telling everyone to take their seats since the show was about to begin. So instead, they shrugged to Papyrus and gestured to the seats. They found a spot in the back, content with watching the show to take up time.

The lights dimmed, save for a few normal and tinted ones aimed at the catwalk. Low, upbeat music began to play as the first monster stepped out on stage.

She was a very thin, orange gecko-like monster, wearing a white dress shirt and ruffled skirt combination; the skirt having a lot of reds, whites, and blacks.

She walked cheerfully down the catwalk, stopped at the end in a pose for a bit, then turned around and walked back.

As she left, another monster came out and did the same – this time a short purple monster with horns wearing what looked like a really frilly white and black school girl-like outfit. She bubbly made her way down the catwalk, posed, and turned around.

And so on and so forth.

Frisk did recognize a few of the models as monsters they had seen around Waterfall, a couple even from Hotland, and even… A Temmie? …Maybe it's Bob.

Each of the outfits were colorful, dramatic, and Lolita-like; like Papyrus said, adorable but not usually considered to be 'everyday wear.' It wasn't their style, so they instead focused more on the monsters themselves instead of the clothes.

So they noticed immediately when one very well-known monster came out on stage… or who appeared to be him. A short skeleton, definitely not dressed in a winter jacket and shorts, shyly walked out on stage.

Frisk knew that some monsters could look very similar to each other (like the Temmies) but skeletons, they had been sure of, looked varied from one another – their proof being Sans and Papyrus.

They couldn't help but wonder why did this skeleton look so much like Sans.

The (maybe female?) skeleton who looked like Sans was wearing a light blue (similar to San's jacket, they noticed) ruffled Lolita dress with white and black accents, white, long sleeves and matching chest area with black buttons, and a light blue bow tied around the neck area. A matching blue flowered headband finished it off.

The skeleton's face and short stature, which were an exact match to Sans, were the only things keeping Frisk from dismissing the thought.

They leaned in towards Papyrus and whispered, "Do you see what I see?"

Papyrus answered with little subtly, "DO YOU MEAN THE SKELETON WHO LOOKS VERY MUCH LIKE MY BROTHER, SANS?"

Frisk was too surprised to face-palm when said skeleton completely halted on stage and stared right at them in shock, and then embarrassment as his cheek bones took on a blue hue. They stared at each other for what felt like hours before a voice went "pssst" from behind the stage's curtains, and Sans awkwardly finished his go at a fast pace. It was apparently fine for the audience as most of them either 'awwed' or chuckled.

Frisk and Papyrus watched him retreat. It took a minute before Frisk could speak, "Pap, I think that was your brother."

The show went on, though Frisk didn't pay as much attention to the other monsters after that point (only enough to notice whether they were or were not their short skeleton friend).

Sans appeared two more times, both times still looking reluctant and embarrassed, which the audience still didn't seem to mind; they heard some whispers of 'cute' and… 'dandere'? (They wondered briefly if any other monsters were as obsessed with anime as Alphys was.)

One of the outfits, at first glance, looked simply like a blue hoodie and matching pants, making Sans appear semi-normal, until they noticed that the hoodie had cat ears. It also had matching cat paw gloves and slippers. And a tail, they noticed as Sans turned around and walked back up the stage.

The last outfit they saw him in another dress – a silky, light blue (which seemed to be his theme, they guessed) frilly, babydoll dress that had a very large bow of the same color on the chest area. A smaller bow was a choker around his neck, and another large bow rested atop of his head, slightly skewed left.

Not long after Sans made his final appearance, the show ended. The lights turned back on and Muffet stood on stage thanking them for coming and encouraging them to buy more pastries on their way out. Frisk and Papyrus stayed in their seats, unsure of what to do, even as everyone around them left.

"PERHAPS," Papyrus said after a quiet minute, "WE SHOULD TRY TO FIND SANS."

Just as he said that, a bird-like monster with red and gold feathers rushed over to them. "You're wanted back stage," he gestured for them to follow.

They did, and were led passed the curtains, back stage, where the models from before were all undressing, and stagehands were cleaning up. Soon enough they were standing in front of a nervous looking Sans dressed in his regular clothing. He absently thanked the bird monster, who left the three of them alone, and stood there awkwardly.

Neither Frisk nor Papyrus were quite sure what to say either.

Sans ended up breaking the silence the best way he knew how. "so, I dress you know now, heh," he said without looking them in the eyes.

Frisk smiled slightly, "Not one of your better ones."

He rubbed the back of his skull with his hand. "Yeah, I know…"

"SANS," Papyrus asked. "WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?"

The short skeleton finally looked at him. "well, it's embarrassing… this job I mean. it had nothing to do with not trusting you, I just didn't want to admit what I was doing."

Frisk broke in after, "If you don't like what you're doing, then why do you still do it?"

Sans coughs falsely, "well, first of all the money is really good; like one night here is the equivalent of a week at my hot dog stand, or even a few days at my sentry post. and second, well, I kind of got used to it." He shrugged, "don't get me wrong, it's still awkward to do for the most part, but I don't hate it – it's not torturous, just awkward… and when someone recognizes me: mortifying."

Frisk wanted to cut away the tension, so they put their hand on San's shoulder in comfort. He went rigid at first, before looking at Frisk who smiled at him gently, and then relaxed a bit.

He looked up at Papyrus with questioning eyes. "Pap, are you… disgusted by me?"

It took a second to process the question. "WHAT? SANS, OF COURSE NOT. I MAY GET DISGUSTED WITH YOU, LIKE WHEN YOU FALL ASLEEP AT YOUR POST OR ARGUE WITH ME OVER YOUR SOCKS. BUT YOU'RE MY BROTHER, AND I WOULD NEVER BE DISGUSTED BY YOU; THE GREAT PAPYRUS WILL ALWAYS BELIEVE IN YOU!

"AND COMPARED TO OTHER THINGS YOU'VE DONE, THIS DOES NOT EVEN LEAVE ME DISGUSTED WITH YOU. CURIOUS AND A BIT TEASING, YES," he grinned "BUT NOT DISGUSTED."

He reached down and hugged his brother as Frisk took their hand off of his shoulder, and the shorter skeleton hugged back.

When Papyrus pulled back, everyone was grinning.

"Hey," Frisk asked. "How did you even end up with this job, anyway?"

Sans chuckled dryly. "I'm not even sure, actually. originally I was just supposed to help the spiders bake-"

"I knew it," Frisk whispered.

"And I did the first few times. but one day, one of Muffet's models, who is around the same height as me, couldn't make it – something about puking rainbows – and she was desperate for someone to fill in since the girl was supposed to be modeling one of the best outfits. she happened to notice me coming out from the kitchen and offered me double the pay – money for the baking I already did, and for the modeling job, if I helped her out. And well, this was back when, Pap, you remember the TV incident with Undyne?"

"YOU MEAN THE TIME UNDYNE LOST HER TEMPER AND THREW OUR TELEVISION THROUGH THE WALL AND INTO OUR MAILBOXES?"

"Yeah," Sans confirmed. "this was like a week after that happened, when I was still saving for a new tv. I knew I wouldn't get another opportunity like this again, so I took the offer."

He looked toward the ground. "I didn't think I'd look good in anything, or be a hit with the audience, but I was told I was-"

Frisk giggled and told him about the comments they heard in the audience.

His blush returned, "so yeah, after that Muffet was adamant that I stay as a model. And like I said, it's frilly awkward at times, but the pay is better, and I feel like I can relax a bit with my other jobs. you know?"

Papyrus smiled humorously, "I THINK IT TAKES A LOT OF SPINE TO GO OUT THERE AND DO THAT, EVEN WHEN IT'S EMBARRASSING, NYEH HEH HEH."

Sans relaxed fully and chuckled, "yeah, it's ok. I can take a bit of ribbing, at my expense. the situation is pretty humerus, after all."

Frisk laughed, happy that the tension was officially gone.

Papyrus groaned. "SANS, I WILL SUPPORT PRETTY MUCH ANYTHING YOU DO, THIS INCLUDED – IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU NOT LAZING AROUND ON A SATURDAY AFTER ALL – BUT THAT LIST OF 'ANYTHING' DOES NOT INCLUDE OVERUSE OF PUNS."

Sans just grinned at him, "thanks Pap."

Frisk definitely didn't regret trying to solve the mystery, especially before their next meeting with Asgore, since this touching little scene filled them to the brim with determination.

Once again, I apologize for not being good at puns. But I also didn't want to overuse the ones I've seen in a lot of fics (I tried really hard not to), but I still ended up with one anyway ("humerus"... it fit well and I couldn't think of a substitute).

I also think I overdid it with the "Nyeh heh heh"s but they also felt like they just fit in with that moment in time. :/ Oh well.

Hope you all enjoyed.