Discord's Rewrite

I don't own MLP

Beta: Dragon_Wizard91

The heads of the budding pony nation shared looks of varying discomfort until Puddinghead inquired. "Do you want us to start with the good or the bad?"

"I shall take da ugly," Discord answered with an over the top French accent, complete with a stereotypical mustache, a black beret forming on his head as well...that suddenly produced a fountain of a red liquid from the top. Discord held a glass up to the spray and filled it up before turning his attention back to them.

"So, Arcus then," Platinum began dryly with a flick of her mane. "The Good Lieutenant has kept his official word on you nonexistent."

"Unofficially, he thinks you're a threat to our entire existence," Commander Hurricane supplied. "His known underlings have been spreading fear and self-righteous anger over your general existence. How you used your powers to plague us on our first arrival, treat matters of survival like games, casually lorded your power over us to force us into an unfair treaty and so on."

"Yeah, kind of expected that," Discord shrugged with little care, before taking a sip of his drink, "The real question is, how well has it caught on?"

"That's where the irony comes in: About one in five or six ponies are in Arcus's camp against you. And yes, ponies: it would appear that he's actually softened his views on earth ponies and unicorns in his disapproval of you to unite with other dissenters against you," Puddinghead informed exasperatedly.

"He hasn't," Discord informed bluntly, to their surprise.

"Then what would you call ponies on his side of things initiating meetings with..." Platinum paused to consider the proper wording of her question. "Anticorders in the other tribes?"

Discord blinked, grinning wide. "The Anticord Movement. I like it," Discord informed with a delighted cackle before settling down, Lily giggling at his antics. "As for what I'd call it, I'd say mutual benefits. The ponies Arcus is meeting with, the ones he's REALLY meeting with aren't just Anticorders, they're Deunionizers: Ponies against the uniting of the three tribes."

None of the ponies present looked remotely phased by this. They were well aware of the anti-union elements in their tribes. Buck, being pro-union was an unspoken taboo until recently! "But...wouldn't they hate each other on principle of, you know, being different tribes working together?" Silkdial pointed out.

Lily Frost clicked her tongue in disagreement. "Ponies that hate each other can still work together. Especially if the plan ends with them parting ways and hopefully never seeing each other again," she pointed out in a sly voice.

"Which brings up another issue. How are your lovely subjects adjusting to living wither to wither with their former enemies?" Discord inquired with a bright look in his eyes.

"Shouldn't we finish discussing Arcus and the Deunionizers first?" Puddinghead pointed out in concern.

She jumped as "something" blew in her ear, a funnel of paperwork flying out the opposite ear. She looked up and was bewildered by the sight that her hat was apparently now made of real pudding...and a chunk of it was bent over the rim of her hat and looked very much like a chocolate Discord.

"Now, now, my dear Betty. If we are to play The Lieutenant, we must first know more of the pieces," Puddingcord explained before jumping off her head and into the empty, hollow center of the table. The interior circle filled in as the concoction of magic and dessert spread out and transmuted into wood. It formed what almost looked like a chessboard, except with circles and four-point stars rather than squares. In the center was a little totem of a pegasus, covered in red lines. Around him were smaller effigies of members from all three tribes. Many of them held little flags with negative circles over faces of Discord on them, but the ones closest to the pegasus totem were flags that depicted one of the standards of the three tribes.

Puddinghead glanced over at Discord, stunned by what just happened, but found he was sitting right as he had been. She checked her hat to find it was fake again, while the others around the table all just stared at it curiously.

"So, this is a game to you?" Silkdial inquired with minimal judgement in her voice, hooves on the table as she tried to get a better look.

"I don't understand the question," Discord retorted wryly, swirling his glass with his draconic talon. "All things in life are a gamble-"

"-So you might as well as treat it like a series of games-" Starswirl continued on sagely, making Discord stop with his jaw froze open.

"-And get some fun out of it before the end!" Bullion finished on with a series of snickers as Discord's jaw literally fell off.

Everypony stared with wide eyes between the three magic users while Lily Frost hummed a tune as she casually put the bottom half of Discord's mouth back on, a bizarre cranking sound emitting from him as she did. With a pop, Discord smiled widely, too widely and patted his collared mare in appreciation. "Thank you very much Lily Frost," he said in a too-happy voice.

"You're very welcome, Master," Lily Frost answered in an also disturbingly chipper voice as she turned around and sat on Discord's left leg, very much like a cat as he start stroking her mane.

Every individual in the room shrunk back a little. There was something incredibly creepy about this, in an entirely non-sexual way, as the air grew thick. "So, Stars, Bullion? Which one told you?" Discord asked, giving them both eye smiles...with his eyelids having their own eyes that smiled.

Clover and even some of the guards were tempted to see how deep that level of repetition went, but instincts told them to remain perfectly still and not attract attention to themselves.

The only ones unaffected were, incidentally, the very two to whom Discord was talking. Both stallions pretended not to notice the tension in the room, or Platinum hiding behind her father.

"Luna," Starswirl answered with a shrug, Bullion nodding in amusement. "Never took you for the philosophical type, Lord Discord."

"That's because you assume too much of what I say is nonsensical nonsense instead of philosophical nonsense," Discord countered.

"I'm fairly sure some of us take it as nonsensical philosophy as well, which most civilized creatures are familiar with," Bullion refuted with a knowing look.

Discord flicked a claw in acceptance. "Point," he agreed, patting Lily on the head, prompting her to jump down beside his throne again.

Everypony suddenly released a breath they didn't know they were holding. Hurricane gave a long, steady sigh while several guards had wobbly legs. "What the sarding Tartarus was that!?" Platinum yelled, looking very faint as her father helped her back into her own seat.

"You shouldn't work yourself too hard like that, NumNum," Bullion playfully scolded.

"My, Chancellor, do you need a moment for breakfast? You look rather pale," Starswirl asked in mock ignorance.

"...We really don't need the reminder that you are three scary broodsarders," Gust announced with an eyebrow twitch, several of the Centracustos nodding as well.

"Seems it got a bit too stuffy in here for the guards," Discord snickered as he continued the act. 'Amusing really. It's very easy to see why one would get the misconception that the unicorns really were superior to the other two tribes with Bullion and Starswirl around. But the old Hornhat would never get involved in an inter-pony conflict like that even without the sun-moon job: he finds all three tribes equally annoying, just as I found them all equally boring fist time around. Besides, Hurricane would never use a frontal assault against the last Battlecorn, and the Earth ponies already know how to make good catapults to even the scales a bit. One Battlecorn makes a good deterrent on defensive, but he couldn't carry a war on his own, let alone an offensive one,' Discord mused to himself, glancing to the other two leaders.

"You enjoy showing off, don't you?"

Discord perked up as his throne spun around on its own to lay eyes on the two alicorns entering the tent, smiling at him. "Why, whatever do you mean, Lulu?"

Luna rolled her eyes at his feigned ignorance while Celestia eyed their resident sacrifice. "Was bringing her on a collar really the best idea?" Celestia questioned skeptically as Lily Frost preened and kept her head high to show off the display of ownership on her person.

Discord arched a brow at the elder sister. "You assume it was my idea," he pointed out, getting a few snickers.

"But it was?" Lily Frost reminded with a tilted head, causing a momentary pause for everypony to glance at Discord for answers.

"No, your idea was that I showed up holding the leash, MINE just had the broken leash here," Discord refuted with a dry look to the mare, his tail flicking the aforementioned chains.

"Surprises me none," Luna commented as she walked up to the table, looking at the figures on the board. "So, is this a game, or politics?" she inquired curiously.

"The difference?" Discord countered with a smirk.

"Games can be fun to watch, while politics can put somepony to sleep," Celestia answered, scowling at the board. "I'm guessing they told you about those against you and the union?"

"Me, yes. I told them Arcus was working with the Deunionizers behind an Anticord front," Discord explained.

"How did you know?" Puddinghead asked curiously.

"Ponies come to us looking for advice and voicing concerns they have," Luna answered casually.

"As the Guardians of Ponykind, they know we only want to secure a peaceful and prosperous life for all mares and stallions, tribes regardless," Celestia elaborated.

"Even if they don't always agree with that last part," Hurricane realized with a hum, leveling his gaze on the female immortals. "I take it you've gathered your own information about how everypony is reacting?"

"Oh yes," Luna answered, smiling despite the serious situation. "It is true there are those against Discord here, or even combining the tribes, but even more are concerned with how this united tribe will be run."

"Assuming things stay non-violent, you ponies can hash out whatever government you want down the line," Discord cut in, scratching his chin. "But it would be good to put more focus on them."

"I'm confused," Silkdial murmured. "Are you benching governmental reform or not for this meeting?" she inquired.

"I believe he is saying it should be used to drown out the deunionizers and fuel efforts to make this work," Count Lumen answered with a thoughtful smile.

"That could work," Bullion mused as he used his horn to pick up one of the deunion figures on the board, coloring it with multi-color question marks. "I imagine a good deal of deunion-motivations are built around skepticism and doubts of such a nation functioning."

"Oh, more than a few," Celestia confirmed with a stern look. "Even if all tribes were put into the same system, many do not like being put into a hereditary system of nobility. Or mandatory military service. Or councils where one must debate with the winners of, and I'm quoting here, "popularity contests.""

"But debating it would show there is a serious effort to make this work," Starswirl mused.

"There are actually several circles forming under supporting some ideal of government," Celestia continued, glancing to Discord for answer, he leaned back in his throne leisurely, once more sipping his drink, while holding up his talons and preparing to snap them. "Inter-Tribal Royalty, Noble Republic, Military Republic, Pure Kratocracy, Direct Democracy, Benevolent Unicorn Supremacy, Magic Supremacy, Magocracy, Anti-Magic, Anti-Mage, and Treatist," Celestia listed off, Discord snapping his finger to make a new piece appear on the board, representing the different factions. "And...Alicornists and Discordians."

Discord didn't even flinch as he made the final two pieces appear.

Several eyes glanced over the alicorns and draconequus. It was well known that there were a portion of each tribe that valued the alicorns as much or even above the heads of their tribes. It was unavoidable, with their immortality and benevolence. As the sisters had never showed any desire to rule, it had never been an issue.

But this new faction...

"The...Discordians, for now, mainly take the treaty seriously, acknowledging these lands as gifted by Discord, granting him certain authority here," Luna offered tentatively.

Discord suppressed a chuckle at that. 'There were always Discordians in the old timeline too. I wonder what'll happen in this spin since I'm not going to disillusion them with chaos plaguing them as much as the others?' he mused to himself as he stroked his chin. 'Celly and Lulu's supporters grew a lot in the early days of my reign of chaos since none of the leaders had any hope of dealing with me. But maybe that'll still happen naturally with them taking more direct roles in this new society we're building.'

"There is also the Sacrificial Society," Silkdial spoke up.

"...What?" Hurricane, Bullion, Celestia, Lily, and even Discord inquired after their brains caught up with the name.

The mini-horned mare shrugged. "Well, it's mainly just a couple mares wondering just how bad or...good it is being sacrificed to Discord," she explained awkwardly.

"...I have a fan club?" Lily Frost asked in stunned glee.

'I have a cult-harem in the making?' Discord wondered with wide eyes. "...We're going leave that group unacknowledged for now."

"Agreed," the three leaders answered with a nod.

"Does that mean I can't meet with them?" Lily Frost asked with a pout.

"Them specifically, no, but if it's just somepony you meet in the street? You can tell anypony anything you want about anything we do anytime we're together," Discord answered bluntly.

"...Why does it sound more lewd the more anys you stack on it?" Gust grumbled with a face hoof as many ponies blushed.

"I pray the lack of "anywhere" means you've kept your...activities to your own realm?" Platinum inquired with a sigh.

"Prude," Lily Frost rebuked wryly.

"For now," Discord offered offclawedly.

"Not comforting," Starswirl remarked with a head shake.

"Not meant to be, Horn-Hat," Discord answered leisurely. "Besides, it'll help take care of another aspect of the Anticorders."

"Oh? What's that?" Celestia asked curiously.

"The ones against giving me mares as part of the treaty. Lily making the point of showing she's happy and the entire thing was willing on her part from the start will put a few holes in that particular sail," he explained.

"What about the ones that think the unicorns have more clout with you for giving you one of theirs?" Puddinghead asked.

"That won't be a problem," Hurricane informed, getting curious looks as he looked to Discord. "Quite a few ponies saw you comforting Smart Cookie over the deaths of her mother and father. Between that and the incident with Sub-Lieutenant Faest Brisa, many ponies came to the conclusion that our illustrious landlord postponed his first...tasting of his sacrifice to comfort an EARTH PONY for the death of her SOLDIER PARENTS," Hurricane explained with the slightest upturn at the corner of his mouth.

Platinum turned to Discord with wide eyes, who looked amused at the news. Had he planned this? Had he comforted Clover's friend to boost his public image? If so, it was very masterful. If not, it was brilliant luck. Or perhaps it was both for the mischievous caster, adapting to every situation so quickly it appeared more like one elaborate plan than many little events all capitalized on at the right time and place.

If Discord noticed the studying look of the princess, he ignored it. "There are a lot of group against magic in different forms. Some earth ponies are against the weather and arcane magics, but some of them view the Pegasi controlling the clouds no differently than Earth Pony mana influencing crops and plants and just hate the overt magic of the unicorns. Either way, I'm both groups' worst nightmare in that respect," Discord admitted.

"Thankfully, even some of them view us as exceptions to that ideal," Celestia said with obvious but controlled disgust over a biased hatred for magic.

"If they make me a common enemy, those groups will be the ones to pull something stupid on Arcus's behalf," Discord mused knowingly.

"Do we know who the leaders of the Earth Pony and Unicorns Anticorders and/or Deunionizers are?" Luna inquired.

"No, it's still too early to see obvious leadership," Puddinghead answered with a solemn look.

"Regardless, exposing the deunionizers in the higher ups could more or less turn the movement on itself, at the right time, with only the blind or the true anti-me ponies sticking to it," Discord mused idly,.

"I'm sorry, I'm a bit lost on something," Clover the Clever spoke up with a thoughtful scowl. "What is, ultimately, the plan to deal with the ponies that won't cooperate?"

"Still behind in politics," Platinum mused fondly. "We're trying to minimize their support base to prevent anything akin to an outright rebellion."

Celestia nodded, knowing this story well. "After that, it is our hope that the remaining ponies will simply stew in their misplaced discontentment over the unification, or at worst leave."

"We're not looking for a mass slaughter of deserters, Mage Clover, just neutering them as potential threats to Fundony," Hurricane informed flatly, Puddinghead nodding in agreement.

"Worst comes to worst, we can banish some of them to the west," Discord pointed out helpfully, intentionally using "we" instead of "I." No reason to give the Anticorders fuel for portraying him as a tyrant.

"The West? The sea?" Luna asked, confused for how that wasn't a death sentence.

"Ahh, right, you ponies wouldn't know about that," Discord murmured in remembrance, waving in a general southwest direction. "There's a large land bridge that leads out of my lands. If they hate me or the other tribes too much to stand being around them, they can try their luck elsewhere," Discord explained, getting thoughtful looks from the ponies around him.

Offering that information out right might not be too wise to keep the tribes together, but he knew the ponies couldn't afford to migrate again for several years. Plus, these lands were becoming increasing enticing to these equines, he could tell and they were not in any hurry to risk leaving the protection of the Unity Flame, lest they fall prey to the windigos again. Or something worse.

"So, what now?" Clover asked to prompt the discussion along.

"For now we should move on and do what we can to stay ahead of Arcus," Discord answered with a snap of his tail, the board and figures turning to liquids as they began to spin and shrink toward the center, as if they were going down a drain. On a whim, he tossed his glass into the vortex as well, the glass breaking with the sound of a gunshot. He even added in the sound of a toilet flushing and gurgling for effect as it vanished from reality to leave the table hollow again.

"Is there nothing else to discuss?" Celestia asked, looking around the table as everypony recovered from the display.

"On this? Preemptive actions only work on known enemies, not potential ones," Hurricane stated with a scowl. "Most measures against them would spark the fire we're trying to prevent. The best thing we can do is show that this union can work."

"Well said," Bullion agreed with a nod reluctantly shared with Platinum.

"I have something," Discord interrupted, getting looks of interest. "Bugbears are rare as far west as Canter Pass is. Celestia and Luna mentioned that the war between the Dragons and Griffons cleared up, so griffons pushing out bugbears in their northern lands would explain that- and I'm rambling again. Bla!" Discord paused to spit out a miniature metal bugbear as if it were piece of tobacco.

"Ew," Silkdial stated with a scowl as she stared at the figurine.

"Was that necessary?" Celestia deadpanned, neither surprised or amused as the metal bugbear began to rise and inflate into a metallic bubble floating in the air.

"Point is, has there been any other wildlife issues while I've been gone?" he inquired, pretending to ignore the event happening near him. "No bears made of stars, crocodiles made of rocks, wolves made of trees?" he gave as examples, waving his claws around and around as the metal bubble morphed into balloon-like imitations of each creature before returning to a sphere.

Most of the others looked fairly fascinated by it though, including Luna who looked tempted to try touching it.

"...Are any of those things real?/Meshen's birthday is in three months month," Clover asked nervously and Puddinghead stated before realizing what she had said.

"Yes, they are and I will be there," Discord responded to both without missing a beat, watching as Luna finally grasped the metal orb with a smile.

"No, the only pests have been these rock-shaped crabs that keep wandering near town," Starswirl answered with a shrug.

"Rockrabs...?" Discord repeated in surprise before his face went into a blank face glare as he turned to the younger Alicorn, busy holding the shiny sphere between the tips of her wing. "Luna," he addressed flatly, making her jump as the orb popped in her hold, covering her in liquid metal.

"...Yes?" Luna answered with minor embarrassment, thankful that no one laughed.

"Where is he?" he demanded knowingly.

"Oh, Luna, really?" Celestia asked in exasperation.

"What? He said they were harmless. I took that to imply it was safe to keep one as a pet?" Luna questioned, looking between her friend and sister.

"Who and what are we talking about?" Princess Platinum inquired with a hard stare at the smallest immortal, wondering what she had done now.

"We are speaking of Diocletian," Luna answered as the liquid began to cascade off her unnaturally fast and seep into the ground. "A rockrab I had adopted as a pet since our first excursion to Discord's realm."

"And that is attracting more of them?" Starswirl deduced.

"Some," Lily Frost spoke up with a head tilt before looking up at her master, having gotten to know some of the (currently) reoccurring creatures in his realm. "Unless I'm wrong, they are harmless?"

"Yes," Discord admitted with a grumble, glancing at the pony leaders.

"I, um, haven't had any reports of them being anything other than surprising and they don't really come into town, so I don't have any complaints," Puddinghead answered uncertainly, her fellows not offering any complaints.

Discord hummed before chuckling. "Eh, to sard with it. Ponies, tell me if the rockrabs become pests and I'll tell you the secret repellent," Discord offered graciously as he floated out of his seat, banishing it into dust with a flick of his tail. "Now, if you'll excuse me, my friends and sacrifice owe me a tour of Fundony. Love the name by the way. Until next time, I'll be nearby if you need me," Discord bid farewell as he began to float to the exit with Lily Frost following dutifully after him. "See you at Meshen's party, Gustzilla?" he asked without looking as he past the stallion.

"Wouldn't miss it, Lord Cord," Gust answered with dry amusement, several soldiers saluting the draconequus as he exited.

"Will that be all, Commander, King, Chancellor?" Celestia inquired with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes, we're done for today. Thank you for coming, Guardians," Bullion answered with a nodded shared by his counterparts.

"Barring an emergency, we'll meet back here in three days, hopefully with plans on how to handle mining the gems," Puddinghead announced, getting affirmation from around the table.

"Then we'll be off as well," Luna stated politely as she and her sister left, Celestia giving her a dirty look upon exiting the tent. "What? My desire to take a rockrab is no more outlandish than you wanting a phoenix," Luna defended.

Celestia turned to Discord and Lily Frost, sitting on the original meeting table Discord had conjured what seemed so long ago already. "I don't suppose either of you can talk sense into her?" she asked rhetorically.

God and sacrifice alike glanced to one another with expressions of bewilderment. "I'm...sorry, have we not met already?" Discord asked slowly. "Cause sense isn't my strong suit. Besides, little bit of chaos crawling around will help ponies get use to me."

"And while I could never deny the...benefits of being his, I can honestly say I enjoy his personality," Lily Frost stated helpfully, stressing the word benefits.

Celestia sighed at that, blushing as she rubbed her hoof to her head to banish the perverse images Lily loved to conjure. "Sard it all."

"He has," Lily confirmed bluntly, Discord doing something between a grin and a smirk.

"...Even...?" Luna tried to inquired subtly.

"Whatever you're thinking, yes," Lily Frost reiterated without shame.

"Great, yes, enough of that," Celestia said with an eye roll as they all took seats. "Is there a reason there's an sound and illusion barrier around this place, Discord?"

"I get the impression there was some things you didn't want to say?" Luna inquired with a head tilt and a knowing look upon her face.

Discord chortled at that. "Oh yes. But first, anypony hungry?" he inquired as he popped up food for all of them.

"...What's the catch? There's no chance this is just soup," Celestia stated warily, eyeing the bowls filled with steamy green liquid.

"It all tastes like a random, non-equine meat," Discord explained nonchalantly.

"Why would-!?" Celestia asked in disbelief, stopping with eyes wide as saucer as she saw Lily Frost already drinking it.

"Tis not truly meat, is it?" Luna asked, less offended by the idea.

"No, just magically tastes like the really thing," Discord promised as he sipped his own with a scowl. "Dammit, Jellyfish."

"I think I got chicken," Lily Frost answered with a pleased tone.

"A male one, no doubt," Luna joked before taking a drink of her own. "Hm...strangely not unappealing. What is this?" she asked curiously.

Discord hummed as he took the bowl from her with his tail and took a drink for himself, humming in thought at the taste. "Dung beetle," Discord answered instantly, making Luna spit it out in disgust, wiping her tongue off. "Pffffft! Haha, Lulu, I was just joking!" he laughed, slapping his knee at her reaction.

"Truly?!" Luna asked hopefully.

"Of course. It was locusts," Discord answered honestly.

"...Marginally better," Luna grunted, still displeased as everyone turned to Celestia.

"...I'm not eating this," she said flatly, scooting it away from herself.

"Good, because I can tell you this just by looking at that soup: You'd be tasting something's brains," Discord stated wryly as Celestia pushed it as far away from her as possible. "As I'm not a pony, possibly mine," he added in, causing her to flip it over the edge. Discord shook his head in amusement. "I know how to find the leaders of the Anticorders on the Earth Pony and Unicorn fronts," he stated out of the blue. They looked curious, but not surprised. "I poofed letters into their clothes during the meeting, explaining it to them.

"And you didn't just mention this in there, because...?" Celestia questioned curiously.

"Tell me, how exactly were the Centracustos selected?" Discord asked, feigning disinterest to any that didn't know better.

"Most were survivors from Canter Pass, like the Warrant Officer, all hoof picked by their leaders," Luna answered in understanding. "You suspect we already might have spies among us."

"And if word gets back to them about what we know to look for, they'll lay low and possibly go underground, so to speak," Lily Frost explained, Discord patting her on the head in praise, making her giggle playfully.

"The unicorn will be a noble, obviously," Discord pointed out, stroking his beard. "He or she will be easy to find eventually. Perhaps one of the unicorns trying to ease reliance on the other two tribes. I'm certain there were unicorns trying to create and supply their own harvest or manipulate the weather in order to win favor with Bullion. The earth pony is tricky, however. Their best merchants are like nobles in comparison, but most of them can only profit from this union. It's more likely a farmer or landowner, somepony that has essentially lost everything by coming here and has no clear way of getting it back with everypony moving in together."

"...And how did you come to this conclusion?" Luna asked after an awed silence with dropped jaws.

"Hatred is an unpleasant emotion, Lulu. It takes a certain drive and devotion to keep it burning enough to commit to a cause driven by it," Discord answered without care.

"And you don't act like this more often, why?" Celestia asked with a scrunched brow.

"Because, Celly, being serious all the time also takes a drive and devotion that I only find when needed. Which is rare," Discord answered with a toothy grin before turning grim. "There is an alternative in both cases."

"Oh? Do continue than," Luna requested.

"Somepony that blames me for losing everything in Canter Pass. Someone whose family or valuables were lost in that little disaster and hates that it might not have happened to them if I showed up earlier," Discord explained.

"In short order, the leaders' motivation are either directly professional or personal," Lily Frost summed up nicely. "The leaders will take careful looks at the families and such of those earth ponies and unicorn lost at the Pass."

"But I need you both to keep an ear out for anything that might fit," Discord explained simply. "Or worse, if they get their plotting done quickly."

"What about Arcus?" Celestia reminded with a frown.

"We know Arcus and he knows we know him," Discord reminded meaningfully. "Between that and his popularity, he'll take up the role of being the Public Face of the Anticorders at some point. No one else among the Earth Ponies or Unicorns have as much influence among their own tribe as the Ugly Lieutenant, so they can afford or even need to stay in the dark for now."

"And sheer pride of the Pegasi would prevent him from playing from the shadows," Celestia stated in understanding before looking at Discord oddly. "Why are you so invested in helping the tribes unite? I understand helping us in general by giving us a home, but aiding us come together as a society and repair the rift between us is more than most could expect."

Discord paused, double checking his barrier. "I'm the God of Chaos, Celestia. Change, in other words, especially unexpected change," he explained with a chuckle, smirking deeply. "And despite what it might appear on the surface, this is chaos. Subtle chaos, but chaos nonetheless. Three tribes of wildly different cultures and norms, suddenly uniting into one nation? Madness, truly. The factions you listed just shows a fraction of the new thoughts and concepts bubbling to life in the minds of these mortals. No one expects it to work, so that means I know it can work."

It wasn't the total truth, but it wasn't a lie. His favorite chaos was loud and obvious, but the chaos of a societal revolution was its own kind of mess.

"And you like helping ponies," Luna countered teasingly.

"Mainly kinky mares and beautiful princesses," he clarified in jest.

"You don't seem too fond of helping Princess Platinum," Luna pointed out

"I wasn't talking about her."

The alicorns blushed, barely, still not sure why their fellow immortal called them princesses. "Is Smart Cookie kinky?" Celestia asked dryly as she shook off the embarrassment.

"...Touché. For now," Discord relented to Lily Frost's amusement.

Author's Note:

Ello! Sorry, meant to have this up by Christmas, but...lot of bad stuff happened. Couple things to mention:

This now has a cover image: The original image is by "probablyfakblonde", which I edited. Its posted on the Fimfiction site. I'll post it here in the near future.

I also set up my own pat-reon. No, I'm not going to start withholding fanfic chapters or anything, just advertising it for now.

Besides that, hope you all enjoyed this little bit. In the words of Gandalf, the game is set and the pieces are moving. Now its just a matter of who makes the next move.