Full Synopsis: [Vigilante AU] Tucker's life has been weird for a while. Weird enough that finding a brightly clad jackass bleeding out in the restaurant's dumpster isn't probably the weirdest thing that's going to happen to him that day. Shenanigans ensued pretty readily.

Based on [ashleystlawrence tumblr post/131022051428/] by ashleystlawrence and the initial prompting of goodluckdetective, and considering my dual love of RvB and superhero comics I couldn't resist. And I'll be honest, this has been a blast to write so far! I'll keep it up as long as the creative juices are flowing : )

Red vs Blue and related characters © Rooster Teeth
story © RenaRoo

Hero Time
Chapter One: Someone Threw Out the Trash

He ended his shift every day doing the same thing - more out of garnering some additional good will than out of actually caring whether or not the trash was taken out for the next crew. He'd rather not have a purposeful mess in the backroom like the last time he'd left a half empty trashbag for the midnight shift.

Throwing on a baseball cap and slipping into his jacket, Tucker readied for another cold walk home when Kai looked him over. She was still in her apron and visor, a little bit of ketchup caught on her blouse. She threw an accusatory finger his way.

"You always get so dressed up for the trash, Tucker?" she asked, grin all teeth.

"I'm just going to walk my way out through the alley," Tucker said with a wave of his hand. He grabbed onto the ties of the bag and hoisted it over his shoulder. "Ugh. I hate this thing." He looked back to his coworker. "Anyway, my shift's done, the babysitter's going to have a fucking fit - as usual - they couldn't pay me to come back inside once I'm out that door."

"Oh, they could and you would," she said with a flippant wave. "I'll see you tomorrow, after all! So, ha, joke's on you."

"Yeah, yeah," Tucker sighed on his way out the door. "I'll see you tomorrow, too."

His body was already groaning in protest at the bitter cold just outside the restaurant door. He glared out at the gray skies and wondered a little idly how hot Church was allowing Junior to turn up the heater.

"Man," he groaned as he stopped just by the dumpster. "I'll be lucky if those two don't burn the goddamn apartment down."

Without even having to look at the dumpster, Tucker flipped the lid with his elbow and slung the bag of trash from his shoulder into the bin with a hefty grunt. He was already slamming the lid shut again when he realized that the groaning whine was not from him.

Tucker blinked, staring at the dumpster.

It didn't seem any different from usual.

Exhaling thickly from his nose, Tucker looked around the alley to check if anyone was around to pull one over on him. Then he gave a stiff kick to the metal bin.

The groan picked up again.

"Oh, holy shit," Tucker muttered, quickly lunging forward and throwing the lid open. His eyes widened as he looked beneath the trash he had just thrown in and saw a brightly glad man just beneath.

The guy seemed fairly out of it - sunk into the available trash enough that it was almost hard for Tucker to make out the large gashes and rips across his garish uniform and the smattering of blood out from those. His face was at least halfway obscured by some kind of foreign visor which, for Tucker, submitted the fact that this guy was one of them.

"Oh, fucking hell," Tucker groaned, shaking his head. "I don't want to mess with superheroes. I just got my insurance claim back on the last apartment."

He shut the lid and began to walk away from the dumpster. He had a kid and two other annoyances waiting on him a block away to get concerned with.

Except he came to a stop after just a few steps when he could hear the tangy clanging of the asshole knocking on the inside of the dumpster.

"Fuck me," Tucker groaned, sluggishly turning back to the dumpster and walking back.

"At least... leave lid... up," the bastard was groaning, muffled by the lid.

Tucker opened the lid and glared at the man suspiciously.

This time, the guy seemed at least coherent enough to turn his head toward Tucker more this time.

"Are you going to die after I drag your skanky ass all the way home?" Tucker asked seriously. "I don't feel like dealing with a dead superhero vigil under my window or something. The fire escape is too rusty to use to get out of my apartment."

The vigilante stared at him, almost as if he was bewildered, but didn't have time to answer before Tucker was climbing into the dumpster with him.

"Your kindness... is... appreciated, citizen," the man muttered as Tuckered knelt beside him and began to pull one of the vigilante's arms over his shoulders.

"Oh, fucking great, one of the cornballs," Tucker groaned.

"Your home... sounds like... has safety hazards," the man huffed against Tucker's neck as they began to ease over the edge of the dumpster.

"What? You mean my fire escape?" Tucker asked, ignoring how the man released a feeble moan with the jarring of them hitting the pavement. "Dude, don't even start with safety talks. How often does someone - someone not a jackass in a leotard, by the way - actually use those things?"

"Not... leotard," he continued mumbling. "Kevlar."

"No shit? You still look like you went through a blender," Tucker said, looking curiously over the vigilante. "I mean... literally. Holy shit, dude. Is this one of those really elaborate death traps they have on the news every now and then? Like is Main Street going to be blocked because your dumbass arch nemesis constructed a skyscraper sized blender for you?"

"No," he replied, voice sounding strained. "Please... no ambulance."

"If I was smart I'd call an ambulance," Tucker responded as they rounded to the backstreet. "Fortunately for you, your blended behind got you all the way to Blood Gulch, where there's not a whole lot of smart to go around."

The man made an appreciative hum as he was half drug.

"Have... name, citizen?" he asked weakly.

"Lavernius Tucker," Tucker said back. "Everyone calls me Tucker."

"Thank you, Lavernius?"

"Are your ears not working? I said everyone calls me Tucker."

The man didn't respond initially. He then turned and looked intently at Tucker. "I... have... concussion."

"No shit," Tucker laughed. "C'mon, let's get you inside, Oscar the Grouch."