This is an AU where May Chang was not there when Riza got her throat slit. This was inspired by a conversation I was having about the subject with a few others on Tumblr. I had the draft for this sitting in my docs for a long time, but never had the courage to post it until I had that conversation on Tumblr. Warning for pure unadulterated angst ahead because I was feeling bad and needed to write something reflecting that.

000000

The seconds ticking by were almost audible to Roy. Riza was steadily slipping away and there would be no saving her if he waited too long to make a decision. Her life in exchange for his cooperation in performing human transmutation. That was the deal and, either way, it was a lose-lose situation.

The gold-toothed doctor's disgusting grin made Roy want to burn the man's face off.

"Well?" the doctor sneered. "What will you do, Colonel?"

Roy grit his teeth and growled, attempting to focus on Riza's eyes. They were unfocused and clouded and Roy could feel himself growing numb just from looking at her, his stomach twisting into knots of dread and hopelessness as she bled out in front of him. It seemed like he was always useless when it came to protecting the people he cared about, especially her. Every time she got hurt, it was always his fault. And now she might die for him, for his indecisiveness.

"Colonel…" Riza's voice was quiet, barely above a whisper, but Roy heard her and his expression softened as he strained to listen. The sound of her voice was his lifeline and he clung to it like he would die without it. "There's...no need...to...perform human...transmutation…"

Her whispered words stung and the tears he had been keeping at bay threatened to spill over. Riza became quiet again and her silence terrified him, but he understood and would obey her wishes. The fate of the country was riding on his decision and even as she lay dying, Riza had her priorities straight. He needed to hold it together and put his personal feelings aside, no matter how much his heart and mind screamed at him not to.

"I understand," Roy said, and the gold-toothed doctor's grin grew wider.

"Ah, so you'll do it then?"

"I understand, Lieutenant," Roy continued, ignoring the doctor. "I won't perform human transmutation."

"Huh?" A quizzical look overtook the doctor's features. "How cruel of you, you're just going to abandon your subordinate?"

Roy scoffed.

"Hardly," he said, glaring at the doctor. "You're one to talk. What about all these 'fuhrer candidates' you threw away like trash?"

"I didn't abandon them, I gave them purpose!"

"Tch, some purpose that turned out to be."

"Why do you care anyway? Shouldn't you be more concerned with what will happen to this woman if you keep refusing my offer?"

"Because I'm distracting you, you moron."

The doctor's eyes narrowed in confusion and before he could react, something grabbed him and he was sucked up into the tunnel above, a chimaera jumping down in his place, beginning to attack the fuhrer candidates in an attempt to help the colonel and Scar break free.

As soon as he felt the candidate's hold on him loosen, Roy grabbed one of their swords and sliced the throat of the one closest to him, enabling him to completely break free. He immediately dove for the philosopher's stone, knowing he would probably need it to save Riza, but it was kicked away from him as more of the rejected fuhrer candidates charged at him. Roy snapped at them, clearing a path to his lieutenant.

"Get out of my way you bastards!" he shouted, racing to Riza's side.

Roy picked up her limp form and held her close, pleading with her to stay with him.

"Lieutenant!" he shouted, hoping she could hear him, hoping that it wasn't too late. "Lieutenant, answer me! Open yours eyes! Don't you dare die."

Riza's face was contorted in pain and she wasn't responding to him.

"Please...I need you," Roy choked on his words, the tears he so carefully tried to hide fell now, splashing down to mix with the blood on Riza's face.

Her blood seeped into his pants and gloves as he held her and he could feel her warmth slowly receding. He tightened his arms around her, like he could somehow keep her alive if he just held on to her tight enough.

"Roy…" Riza breathed, the sound of his name on her lips eliciting a choked sob from Roy.

It was the first time she had ever said his name.

Roy held her even tighter as she grew still in his arms.

"No…No, please, Riza…"

Roy shook her, brushed her bangs away from her face and pleaded with her, but she remained still. He checked for a pulse with shaky hands and felt nothing.

The scream that left his throat was haunting and full of such sorrow that it could have easily shattered the hearts of anyone that heard it. It echoed off the walls and down the tunnels that surrounded them and the fighting that had escalated around him didn't matter anymore. She was gone and he felt hollow, empty, broken.

Slowly, tears still streaming down his face, he pressed his lips to Riza's forehead and held her, not caring if he was in danger, because Riza Hawkeye was dead and Roy Mustang died with her.

000000

I didn't feel like looking this up for the accuracy of the dialogue, so sorry. It's AU anyway so changing it up a bit isn't bad, is it? Anyway, hope I didn't make you cry too much.