As a child, Marty deeks often never felt like he belonged anywhere, his rough childhood was a huge impact on that, but also so was how the people at LAPD treated him. Everyone there treated him like shit. They sent him on missions that no one else wanted, and never gave him sufficient back up when he needed it most. When he got the offer for NCIS, he felt wanted for the first time in many years. But with that came the downsides, like Agent Sam Hanna, who never trusted him, or was nice to him. He tolerated the surfer but never openly approved of him, or invited him to barbecues that the rest of the team went to. Deeks accepted it, he wasn't one of them, his badge said LAPD, instead of NCIS.

Callen seemed neutral towards him, he wasn't against the surfer man, but he offered no real advice or help apart from when they were in the field. Deeks didn't mind, Callen was a very private man and was often doing extra work for Hetty because he was team leader, he didn't need the shaggy little orphan boy tagging along for help, asking about things.

Eric was very friendly to Deeks, but that was also his personality. Deeks may call Eric a few nerdy names, but it was all in good fun, because the tech savy man was incredible at his job and kept them all out of harms way and was important. They had a good relationship, as they would ask each other about their weekends and the waves, as both of them surfed. It was more of a secret that Eric surfed, as no one had him pegged as a man that did anything outside of a temperature controlled room with a computer and keyboard, and just thought the man liked the surfer look and personality.

Nell was a sweetheart to everyone, Deeks especially. The others would give him a bit of crap for it when they noticed but they didn't know how far Nell went when she would check on Deeks. Every time LAPD wanted him to go undercover, she would always check the status of his aliases so he was never in danger, and would make sure that he was always backstopped, Something LAPD often failed to do for him. She would also talk to him about the best surfing locations and wave report, so that he was always informed, though he was quite smart and knew when to stay out of the waters, especially on days like today.

Today was an extremely rough day, the case had not ended well, and his team had put blame towards him. How was he supposed to know that the suspect would recognize him from LAPD and then run, and cause a huge shooting in downtown LA, killing one civilian and one fellow officer. He had done everything in his power to stop that, and to get the suspect to stop but it was to no avail- he ran. The team, mostly Sam blamed him. No one spoke to him, no one realized he was bleeding; he'd been hit in the crossfire.

It was not a life-threatening wound, but he was bleeding nonetheless. They all also left without him, leaving him to deal with LAPD, none of which noticed that he was bleeding, they all assumed it was someone else's blood. Once the paperwork there was done, he said screw it and went home. Hetty called, wanting to know where he was but he replied, "dealing with LAPD." Which was more of a lie since he was in his bathroom, trying to pull a bullet out of his forearm with tweezers. It was beyond painful, as he had to dig around and find it and yank it out so that it didn't get infected. Once it was finally out, he poured alcohol all over it to keep it clean and then sewed himself up- all done himself. Hetty later called again and said, "Mr. Deeks, have your report emailed me by tonight, but you are to report to me first thing in the morning tomorrow." He agreed and got to work typing it out on his laptop. Once it was neat and proof read, he sent it in, not noticing that it was nearly 12 in the morning.

Turning his computer off, he lay down but couldn't sleep. He couldn't close his eyes without flashes of today going by. Instead of him getting injured, he saw his teammates die, and it was his entire fault. Since sleep was no option, he grabbed his surfboard and went out. It was high tide and quite dangerous, and still quite dark, he surfed for a bit before laying in the sand, he felt at home, like for once, he belonged. The ocean belonged to no one; it was simply a wild and strong entity that kept going and never stopped, something that resonated in him.

No matter how shitty things were, he kept going, never stopping. He'd been tortured, shot, stabbed, all of it, and he kept going. Sam was a seal and went through hell and back, so had his wife, Marty Deeks could suck up a gunshot wound and carry on.

Going back to his small apartment, he took a shower, nearly forgetting about his wound until he moved his arm, he'd forgotten about the wound and went into the ocean with it, 'oh well' he thought as he took a shower. He looked like crap, but at least he was clean. He left early so that he knew he would for sure be on time to work that day. But luck was not in his favor, as he arrived 10 minutes late for work, due to a huge traffic jam.

"Look who finally decided to show up." Sam said snarkfully.

Deeks kept his head down and didn't say anything.

"For once he's quiet? Call the media! Deeks finally shuts up for the first time in his entire life." Sam continued.

Deeks bit the inside of his cheek and kept silent, Sam often reminded him of his father, the way he would taunt him.

"Mr. Deeks, a word please." Hetty said as she walked into the area with their desks.

Deeks nodded and followed her to her office.

"Mr. Deeks, what happened yesterday was not your fault, he could have recognized anyone else, not just you. I hope that the LAPD didn't keep you too long, as I know they can be quite…challenging."

"They were alright, took me awhile but got things filed and squared away."

"Good, I got your case report this morning, the others have yet to send theirs in. Marty, you are a fine detective, and you would make one hell of an agent one day." She said softly, hinting for him to sign the papers to become an agent.

"No offense Hetty, but as much as I love being here with Nell and Eric…I don't think this is a permanent place for me."

"I see Mr. Deeks...if you ever need a good word put in, especially in DC, let me know."

"Thank you Hetty." Deeks said softly.

"I have a special case for you, I have someone in DC who needs help working with the LAPD and Baltimore PD, it's a crime that took place over several state lines, Senior Field Agent Anthony DiNozzo will land here in LA, in about…6 hours. I want you to work with him. That may include going back to DC if need be. I can make arrangements for Monty if need be."

"That wont be necessary…Monty passed a bit back. He got sick, and had to be put down rather quickly, as letting him continue on would have been cruel."

"Oh Mr. Deeks, that is quite a tragedy, I am sorry for your loss. Monty was a wonderful animal, and good for you."

"Thank you Hetty, it's hard to not have him to come home to after a rough day. He was my best friend." He said with tears starting to come to his eyes. He pushed them away almost instantly and gave her a small smile "is that everything?"

"I want you to go over evidence with Nell until Mr. DiNozzo arrives, so just head right on up there, no need to go to your desk." She said with a nod.

Deeks nodded and did as told.

"Hey Nell. What do you got for me?" he asked as he walked in.

"Hey Deeks, I have a case file on a cartel with ties to LAPD and Baltimore PD. DiNozzo can fill you in on the connection out there. But out here, there have been over 25 murders, 5 of which were Naval personal and their families, and 3 were Marines. We're not sure how that is all connected, but we assume that there must be some illegal activates happening. I have names, bank accounts, addresses and everything, just read through it all, I also have pulled the LAPD's files, which are on the table beside you, warning- its quite a bit. If this operation is successful, a moderate sized cartel will have been shut down, and justice found for 8 military personnel's remaining families, and the families of over 200 other people."

Deeks nodded, it felt like a case that should have been given to someone like Callen or Sam. Setting his thoughts aside, he sat down and read everything, things went back as far as 8 years prior, and the cartel its self, went back 15. The last two deaths had put it all on NCIS's radar.

Around mid afternoon, Hetty introduced DiNozzo to Deeks. Hetty felt that the two would have a good bond- both had troubled childhoods and grew up without a stable father figure. Both had also gone through a lot recently. It was no secret that Gibbs had run off to Mexico after he lost his memory, and it was also no secret how SFA DiNozzo had issues with his team, issues being that they did not respect him or his leadership position and continued to treat him badly and did not come to his backup when he needed them.

The case file had landed on her desk two days prior. She was contemplating who to assign when the events of yesterday went down, the agents all had their mics on, everyone had heard them blame Deeks and say some harsh things to him, all which he took and replied, "I'm sorry." very softly and genuinely.

When the two men met, it was like looking into a mirror, they could both see the pain and the mask that hid it quite well. Both men had their differences, but similarities. Both were jokesters at times, 'fancied' the ladies and hid a lot of their personal issues beneath false personas that no one ever thought to look past.

After debriefing, the two went to LAPD to talk to the higher ups before going and starting an investigation. When the rest of the team heard that Deeks got a special assignment, one of them pointed out, "he's not even an agent, how doe he even have jurisdiction?" Hetty heard and told them, "he may not carry the same badge as you Mr. Hanna, but he has done his best to uphold the law, and carry the standards that our agency has, if you have a problem with my decision for him to work as a Liaison between two offices, please take it up in a written complaint and have it on my desk, other wise get back to work with your case reports, you owe me at least 6 from the last week or so."

"I bet Deeks isn't even near done, he's always talking." Kensi added once she thought Hetty was gone.

"Miss Blye, for your information, Mr. Deeks has twice the amount of paperwork that you agents have, and he has turned all of it in to both agencies earlier than all of you. And I would suggest that you stop being so negative to your fellow teammate, its not very good for trust/ teamwork."

"Deeks isn't even here." Callen pointed out.

Hetty simply gave them all a look, which had them scattering to do work. They all shook their heads; Hetty always came to Deek's aid, every time. It was pathetic; he could never stand up for himself.

The rest of the day was spent filling out paperwork, while Deeks got down to work and started chipping away at the file.

By the next day, DiNozzo and Deeks got a lot done, and made about 8 arrests, with the help of LAPD, they then brought down one entire section of business within a few hours, and by the end of the week, the LA division of the cartel had been brought down. DiNozzo was massively impressed with Deeks, he worked hard, and was serious when needed. He learned about how the cop didn't fit in at LAPD or NCIS. That's when he made the offer for MCRT. Deeks kept it in consideration, he loved his ocean far too much to leave it, nor could he give up his flannels and trade those in for suits 24/7.

While they worked hard in LA, the other agents, Gibbs and his team worked hard in DC and Baltimore, the whole cartel was brought down in a matter of hours. Over 95 arrests where made, all of them doing at least 15 years in a federal prison.

During the entire case, which took about a week, he felt sick. He passed it off as stress but after he waved his new best friend off, he felt dizzy and nauseous. Getting back to his apartment, he threw up in the toilet and passed out on his bathroom floor.

It was 10 am on a Monday that Nell began to worry; Deeks was over 2 hours late for work. She called him twice already but he had yet to answer. Hetty was then informed. Nell made the decision to go over and check on him, she did have an emergency key if ever needed. Eric traced Deek's phone and realized that he had not moved in over 17 hours, or 9 pm the night prior.

Nell hurried there and knocked on the door. Getting no response, she went in. what she saw was an unconscious Deeks in front of his toilet, on his back. She had Eric call a bus. Deek's pulse was faint and slow. She went with the paramedics. They gave him an IV and oxygen. Once in the hospital, he was taken back to be examined, it took an hour but Nell sat there all alone, waiting.

"Mr. Deeks has a severe infection from what appears to be a gun shot wound." The doctor said softly.

Nell's jaw dropped. Deeks had been shot!

"We think that it is about a week or two old, and that he or someone else removed the bulled and stitched it. By the scaring, it looks like he did it. It seems that there was more damage than he realized, he must have passed It off as just being sore, but the muscle was torn and the bone was chipped, he was hit in the bicep, the bullet had gone in at an angle and we will need to surgically remove it. It'll be a two hour procedure, we will remove it; fix the muscle before sewing him back up properly. We also have him on antibiotics; we're hoping that the fever will go down. Right now he's at about 104.3"

Nell nodded. She then informed Hetty who was quite Livid. She had Eric review the case video of the shootout. At one point, you can hear Deeks hiss in pain and say. "Fucking hell, son of a bitch hit me" but no one questioned it or thought twice during the shootout. Hetty then watched has the teammates left Deeks, bleeding and alone. He stumbled but found his way to the LAPD dicks and managed to entertain them for quite awhile. She put it together and realized that Mr. Deeks had been bleeding that entire time, and it wasn't until he got home, which his phone showed around 3.5 hours later, that he stitched himself up. Hetty closed the evidence and then called the team of 3 up.

"I am very disappointed in your actions as a team. You failed your other team member. Not only was he hurt in the line of duty, you disregarded him, and left him to find his own way home after he spent a good amount of time dealing with LAPD." Hetty said with discipline.

"What are you talking about Hetty?" Kensi asked.

"Mr. Deeks was shot in the arm. He said that he had been hit, and it is well documented. He said, and I quote, " Fucking Hell, son of a bitch hit me." you all stormed off rather quickly once the shoot out ended. He dealt with LAPD for almost 4 hours while bleeding, I am not pleased with them either, let it be known. But here at NCIS, we have a higher sense of teamwork and close-knit relationships. It has come to my knowledge that many of you disregard Mr. Deeks as just a cop. But he is quite more. Not only does he get the NCIS paper work done and given to me, he does it very thoroughly and on a timely manner, he then does his LAPD set of paperwork which must be done to their standards and differently from how we do it. He also in his spare times takes cases and represents people as a public defender. He also helps out at the animal shelter and with at risk kids, all while juggling our demanding schedule. You have not seen him as an equal, simply as a thorn in your side, for the last several years. I know Mr. Deeks hates LAPD and his captain, they aren't very nice people, and they have put him in many dangerous situations without backup, and a care. Here at NCIS, we value our agents; they are exceptional at what they do. He has all the qualities of a fine agent, but he has not put in the paper work to be an agent. Something holds him back, and I believe that is you all. He doesn't feel welcome here; you belittle him on a regular basis. While his "jokes" seem immature, it is with a light heart and with a troubled youth that he tries to be the person he needed as a child. You do not know much of his past, and if you only knew, perhaps you would be less of a, how do I say this nicely, asshole.

Mr. Deeks takes his job very seriously, while it may not seems so. This past week, he has been on special assignment. He and a DC agent took down an entire section of a cartel here, before the agent went home to finish the job out there. They brought down the entirety of the Montereos Cartel." Hetty said.

The three agents stood silently, they hadn't realized any of which Hetty said, until now. They knew they were harsh at times, but it was apart of the hazing…which lasted almost 3 years now. It was then that they realized they were in the wrong. Callen and Kensi realized they had messed up, and they had to make it right.

"Is there a way we can make it up to him?" Kensi asked.

"Right now he is in surgery to fix the damage, Mr. Deeks thought it was wise to sew himself up and remove the bullet. It was worse than he realized, otherwise he hadn't done a bad job." Hetty said softly, with a slight smirk towards the end. She knew Deeks was a strong man, that's why she wanted him as an agent.

"oh… Does Monty need anything? A walk? Food? To go out and go potty?" Kensi asked.

"Ms. Blye, Monty has been no longer with us for quite a while now. Mr. Deeks only told me a short while ago."

"what? He's been gone for a while? Why didn't he say something?"

"He didn't feel welcome in your team. You outcasted him on a basis, he was made to feel that everything he went through was not that bad, because he was "not a SEAL" or a "real agent". He felt that his feelings were invalid because of that."

"oh." Kensi Said softly.

"we…we didn't mean to…hurt him."

"but you Have, Mr. Hanna. You must make amends soon or this agency, and team may lose a damn good agent."

"How is he? What's his condition?" Kensi asked, worried.

"He has a severe infection, and the muscle has damage, he should be okay to return to duty once he is healed. The high fever he has is worrisome but once it is back within normal range, he should be fine. He seems responsive to antibiotics, so he should be fine."

"thats good." Callen said softly, joining the conversation. He thought he knew Deeks pretty well, Hetty had given him his file and he had read everything, well what he thought was everything. He knew deeks had it rough, he had been in the system a bit, but he didn't know about his father, or why he was in the system.

Kensi had known that Deeks had a not so clean bak ground, but she never knew the details, she didn't ask, he didn't tell. She wasn't one for sharing her past, and she didn't see the reason to ask Deeks anything, but in this moment, she saw that she had done wrong. She thought back to their interactions and realized that he had acted and responded much like a child that had been abused would.

Deeks had the right amount of stubbornness and being outspoken while he would also quiet down and let dominating personalities take over. Deeks would stand up to her and Callen respectfully and offer his opinion and give them a different side of things when things couldn't be figured out, being a cop gave him experience and situations that most of the teem had not had.

While the team may have gone undercover countless times, they always had back up, and resources to make it. Deeks never had that privilege. He always had to have his own back, and that led him to be creative, and make it all on his own without any outside help. Most times it went fine, and nothing happened, but there was always the rare time where he got in serious trouble and had no resources to help him. His life was on the line, and he always got himself off the line and back to safety.

His life was currently on the line, but modern medicine insured that he would be okay. His friendships…those were in question. Had they previously existed, that was a good question, but now the state of them was in question.

When Deeks woke up, he would have several decisions to make. Would he stay in LA? Would he stay with LAPD and NCIS? Would he trade in his surf board and beach for the streets of the Nation's Capital?

The fate of the LAPD NCIS Liaison Laid in his own hands, but only time would tell what his Decisions would be.

THE END