A/N: Hello everyone! Sorry for the delay, but hopefully the long chapter will make up for it. Thank you so much to everyone who followed, favorited, and in particular, reviewed. I love you all.

MossyMeow: Yeah, Vader not only paused for a few seconds, he called out for her twice. For Vader that's incredible. That's about the closest he'd gotten to the light since he turned. As for Obi-Wan…we'll see. There's a lot of pain on both sides. OrangeJaw29: I like your thinking! Wait and see… CoolCatGamesTY: The original plan for this fic was for Anakin to still be alive in the Sequel Era and for him the go to Starkiller Base instead of Han. He defeated Kylo in about two seconds and brought him back to the Resistance. Unfortunately, after the "reveal" that Palpatine lived, regardless of form, I can no longer include the Sequels in this fic. I can't perpetuate a timeline where Anakin's sacrifice was for nothing, he's not the chosen one, and he is going to live to see Palpatine destroy the galaxy and his family again. I can't do that to him. I have come up with my own timeline, and we will be going in that direction. I promise you won't be disappointed though :) TDThomas65: I'm glad you like it! May I ask what your criticisms are? I'm always interested in everyone's thoughts. Rex Vong Thrawn: We shall see, but I think that is not an… unreasonable expectation. Read on! Syphon01: ch. 2: Because I didn't think of it. I hope you're still reading, and that you continue to enjoy this story for a long time to come.

I do not own Star Wars or its characters.

Chapter 19

Anakin had now been out of the medbay a week. He was still there over six hours a day, between physical therapy and bacta, and also constantly there otherwise for checkups and monitoring and poking and prodding that Ahsoka could tell he hated. Luke and Rex could tell too, but he was much less blatant about it with them. However, he had freedom, and space, and mobility, and that was all that mattered.

He had also started coming to Luke's training, much to the boy's delight. He sat on the sidelines, watching, occasionally offering critiques.

Several of the small packs of unsupervised children that roamed the fleet had also taken to watching the training. By coincidence the two entities had never been there at the same time until today, and Ahsoka couldn't help feeling some amusement as Anakin sat there, stiff as a board and eyeing the children nervously, as if they might bite him if they got too close.

They did not seem to have noticed his discomfort, in fact some of the boys had eagerly gathered around him, exclaiming over his "cool" scars and asking where he got them. They meant nothing by it, simply excited by something they found interesting, but she knew it hurt him deeply.

Out of pity, and also in need of a partner, Ahsoka called out to him. "Anakin, could you help me demonstrate this?" They must have practiced this particular move at least a hundred times, back during the Clone Wars, when sparring had been an easy and fun distraction from the boredom of space travel. She couldn't wait to resume those matches; it would go such a very long way toward making things feel normal again.

To her surprise Anakin's face dropped like a stone and he quickly shook his head, his eyes pleading and fearful. She felt his anxiety suddenly spike but couldn't discern a reason. She had thought he would be eager to show off, and to escape one clueless child that was inching a hand up towards his face, eyes intently fixed on the raised scar under his eye.

She tried again. "Come on! You taught me this one!"

The boy's hand grazed the scar and he jerked as though burned, finally jumping up and moving closer into the center of the room. "Where's the saber?" He practically snapped.

Ahsoka ignored his tone. Anakin would be fine once they got started, she was certain, laughing and teasing her like he always did, jokingly reminding her that the enemy wouldn't be as forgiving of mistakes as he was. She missed those sessions so much…

She held out one of the sticks Kanan and Ezra had used for training sabers, keeping the other for herself. It was a far cry from the equipment they had had at the Temple, but then she supposed beggars couldn't be choosers. At least the sticks were straight, sturdy, and the right length.

He took it from her and moved away, assuming a defensive stance. "So, what are we doing?"

"Aerials." She called back. Luke had seriously improved in his core technique, enough that they could move on to more advanced work. Tomorrow would be something more boring, but complex. Today she wanted to reward her student by teaching him one of the flashy things he had been champing to try.

Anakin nodded, but regarded his stick cautiously. "Are you sure these things are strong enough for that?"

The woman shrugged. "Only one way to find out."

There were many aerial attacks, several of which she had already known when she became a Padawan. This one was one he had taught her, flipping up over a person's head and driving down through it with the blade. If they blocked, the dismount was simple, use their block as leverage to sort of bounce into the second half of the flip. Luke's gymnastics were pretty strong, good enough, she thought, to gain the height required.

"Ready?" She asked, smiling as she recalled how he had teased her when she still wrongly judged on her tenth try, jumping too high and missing connection entirely. "Hey, where are you going, Snips! I'm down here, remember?"

"Ready." He replied.

Ahsoka ran at him, gathering momentum for the high flip, Anakin already starting to brace for the block.

"NO!" He suddenly screamed as she prepared to jump, the stick clattering to the ground as he collapsed to his knees, his arms held up protectively in front of his face. Ahsoka froze, startled by his reaction, before carefully setting her stick on the ground and going to him.

Anakin was cold and sweating, shaking uncontrollably as he melted into her arms. Luke started over with a wide-eyed, frightened look on his face, but Ahsoka stopped him with a small shake of her head.

Anakin didn't want his son to see him in a position of weakness. She and Luke had already discussed this at length, and her silent decline of his help was all that was needed to remind him of it. He nodded his understanding, remaining silently across the room, worried and concerned, ready to step in with support at a moment's notice should it be needed.

"I don't- I don't want to kill you… I don't want to kill you… I- I don't care what he does." His eyes squeezed shut and he continued in a breathy whisper, "I don't want to kill you."

"Shhh… it's okay."

"We have to get out. The temple's going to collapse."

Ahsoka mentally scolded herself for being so selfish. This was her fault. She had pushed him to come watch the training, pushed him to spar with her, for what? Nostalgia? A little of their old camaraderie? He hadn't been ready. The images that had clearly flooded his brain facing her with even a fake weapon were too much for him. And now this was happening, in public, in front of Luke, exactly what he had wanted so badly to avoid.

"We're not on Malachor." She tried to reassure him, Anakin still curled in a ball of fear and mental anguish in her arms. "It's over. We're in the Rebellion, on their command ship. You're safe."

Tortured blue eyes met hers as he uncurled slightly, "Wh-what? How?"

"Remember? Endor? You killed the Emperor, and Luke brought you back to the Rebellion?"

"Luke?" Anakin swallowed, looking around as if trying to get his bearings, seeming to steady slightly. "Yes. Yes, Luke."

"You're safe." She repeated. "You're okay. You're okay."

Anakin breathed heavily, still recovering. He still didn't seem entirely certain of his surroundings, but he was gripping Ahsoka's sleeve like lifeline. "I want… can- can I go back to my quarters now? I don't… want to be here."

The woman nodded compassionately. "Of course."

He continued clutching her as she raised them both to their feet and gently guided him from the room into the hall. Once back in his quarters Anakin huddled under the covers still fully clothed, staring numbly at the wall beside his bed with no expression at all.

Ahsoka hoped she hadn't set him back too far.

Luke was hovering right outside the door when she left. "How is he?"

"Resting." Ahsoka replied.

"But is he okay? What happened back there…"

She looked into the young man's blue eyes, so like Anakin's. He was overflowing with worry and concern, and not a little fear, and she recalled that he had not ceased caring for his father by choice. No, with her and Rex in the picture he had wound up pushed aside, not because Anakin didn't want him around, simply because there were other people he felt more comfortable with in his current vulnerability.

"I don't know, Luke. I'm sorry." She paused. "I think I've made a horrible mistake."

Luke had more questions, but thought they shouldn't continue the conversation here. "We should get away from this door. I don't want Father feeling this."

"Good idea. We'll go to my quarters." Ahsoka chastised herself for not thinking of it. They were both brimming with negative emotion, and whether or not Anakin could hear them, he would feel it all in the Force. Better to go elsewhere.

"But what's going on? What happened?" Luke asked as they finally sat down at the tiny table in Ahsoka's quarters.

Ahsoka sighed. "There was… an incident. Years ago now. Vader and I fought once."

"So? I've fought him."

"Yes, but the battle was difficult for both of us. And at the end of it… he believed me dead."

And I very nearly was, she didn't add. "Sidious knew of my existence and ordered him to kill me, I imagine as a test of loyalty as much as to prevent me training new Jedi, so… he did. And I think this… today… brought back memories of what happened there. It forced him to relive some… awful moments. He didn't know where he was."

I just wanted things to be normal! I just wanted us to laugh and spar again! Why can't we have one good thing?! She ranted in her head, but not out loud. She would vent about this to Rex later. To Luke, as she had been to Ezra, she would be a Jedi, calm and collected, at peace, regardless of the way she really felt.

This was her fault, entirely. Anakin had pled with her not to be involved. Not with words, but with his eyes, with his tone and feeling, and she had ignored it. Ignored all the warning signs that this was too much. According to the Jedi texts he shouldn't have been watching at all, he shouldn't even be on the fleet. Was she ruining all of it? Was she approaching this all wrong? Would he have a better chance if she sneaked him out, went into hiding as hermits on some abandoned backwater somewhere where no one could find them? Would that even be possible?

"Is he going to be all right?"

"I don't know." She responded. "I wish I knew more about these flashbacks. The information available here is… limited."

Luke must have sensed a bit of her distress, "Ahsoka." He said, gazing gently at her. "You're doing a good job. I'm sure Father appreciates what you've been doing."

And so do I, his expression said.

She managed to return her apprentice's smile. "Thanks."

Luke waited a few hours, in an effort to give his father privacy to recover from…whatever that had been, but in time he made his way back over to his quarters. He didn't care whether his father wanted him there, he hated feeling useless while everyone else did everything. He needed to make sure everything was okay.

"Father?" He spoke hesitantly, remaining in the doorway.

The man glanced up from his work, his face brightening as he spotted his son. "Luke! Come in. Hand me that screwdriver, will you?"

Luke did as he was asked, taking the tool from on top of the drawers and bringing it to him.

"No, not that one. The little one sitting next to it. I need to screw in this fan."

Luke quickly corrected his mistake and walked over to watch his father carefully attach the part. "How are you feeling, Father? Are you…Alright?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine." He paused. "Who has been taking care of this droid?! A lot of components have water damage, I keep finding dried mud on things and bits of leaves…It's like someone submerged him in a swamp! But who would be stupid enough to dunk a computer in bog water?"

He was trying to distract from Luke's question, that was clear. He would not be dissuaded. "Father… about what happened earlier…"

"…I've had to replace a lot of parts. Some of his circuitry was on the verge of giving out. And, of course there's still the issue of his struts…"

"Are you sure you're all right?"

"I'm fine. Could I have that wrench over there? I'm going to show you how to fix a flight jet."

Luke finally dropped the topic, abandoning the idea of direct support for just standing there spending time with him. It felt good…right somehow, listening to him ramble and teach. It was like they really were father and son rather than two near strangers. It was like he was a child, dragged out to his father's garage or workshop for some instruction, and he resolved to enjoy it.

The pleasant teaching session finally ended when Anakin had to depart for the medbay. Hours later he finally returned, exhausted from physical therapy and smelling of bacta fluid.

Luke was gone, but Ahsoka was waiting for him, determined to finally resume their work together retraining. The "incident," as Ahsoka continued to call his repeated meltdowns, in the training room had evidently brought the vital importance of that work back to the forefront of her mind.

And tragically, he was still stuck on meditation. Anakin wished they could just skip it or come back to it later. He had always found it difficult and unrewarding, and before his turn to the dark side had rarely meditated unless pushed or if it was needed for some purpose.

However, meditation was vital to increasing his connection to the light side. It could not be skipped. Ahsoka had assured him he would also find it useful for quieting his mind when he was having difficulties with anxiety or panic. He hoped that was true.

He would give anything to stop having "incidents."

Still, they had been working for an hour and he seemed no closer to success. If anything it seemed to be making things worse, as his frustration with his continued failure and his fear that he would be stuck like this forever mounted exponentially.

Ahsoka took some time to help him calm down, soothing his mind with feelings in their bond, before continuing.

"What do you think is going wrong?"

She and Anakin were seated on his bed, Anakin at the head and she at the foot, facing each other.

"I don't know. I'm doing everything you say, and everything that I remember, and it doesn't seem to work! 'Quiet your mind,' 'Open yourself to the Force,' 'Focus,' 'Find inner peace'… Nothing does anything!"

Ahsoka decided to try a new tactic. She had previously decided not to ask about Sith techniques, out of fear of what might happen if he focused on them, but nothing she had tried had worked. It wasn't Anakin's fault; he was certainly skilled and capable enough to meditate. No, the problem lay somewhere in her approach, and perhaps the differences between Jedi and Sith could reveal it.

"Tell me about Sith meditation."

Anakin took a moment to respond, whether needing to think or out of sheer surprise that she had asked him Ahsoka did not know. "Well, you…focus, inward, on yourself. Dig deep, finding all your pain and rage and every awful thing that has ever happened in your life and… and concentrate on them, nurture and grow them. This helps feed your power."

"I'm guessing emotional control isn't something encouraged in the Sith."

Anakin smiled wryly, "Not really, no."

"I think I see the problem. Jedi meditation is about the Force, not yourself. Focusing outward, opening yourself to the Force and letting it steady and calm you."

"I know that." He replied. "I just… can't seem to do it."

She paused, thinking. "I want to try an exercise. Close your eyes."

He did so.

"Don't try to meditate. Just describe this room to me. Don't remember what it looks like; feel your surroundings."

Anakin tried to quiet his racing brain, to just focus on the world around him, "There's…there's a shelf on the wall at the head of the bed."

"What else?"

He tried to ignore the blow to his ego that he was being asked to describe a room like a child first developing his abilities. Ahsoka was just trying to help. "There's an empty set of drawers on the wall behind me, with the door to the hall near the corner. Across from us… is a small table with two chairs. The door to the bathroom is across from the door to the hall."

"Good. Now, let's move on. Reach out further, into the fleet. Where is Luke right now?"

He took a moment, mentally searching until he finally located the boy. "…He's in the medbay, with the Doctor. What are they doing? Are they talking about me?!" Familiar paranoia started to bubble to the surface. He couldn't just sit here! He needed to-

"Anakin, it's okay. Everything is fine. Don't get distracted. Tell me, where is Rex?"

Anakin did as she asked, endeavoring to clamp down the emotion and keep going. After all, Luke was allowed access to all the details of his recovery, and he would be there in a few hours anyway, so he could always ask about the conversation. There was no reason to be afraid.

Why would they tell you the truth? That old cruel voice whispered in his head. If they are conspiring against you, they certainly aren't going to tell you that. They don't care. Luke regrets his decision. He is asking about the easiest way to kill you. You should kill them before it's too late…

He determinedly ignored it, and instead searched for Rex. "He's in a meeting… I can't tell who it's with."

"And Han?"

"…The main hanger."

"Leia?"

"Her bunk. She feels…peaceful. I think she's sleeping."

"Okay." He couldn't see Ahsoka's face, but she felt and sounded pleased. "Now, pull back a little. Feel the Force around you. Focus on it, on the way it flows. Then move to your connection, on the way your living Force meets the cosmic Force and interacts with it. You don't need to talk, just feel."

He did as she asked. He could indeed feel it, swirling and flowing around and through them in a constant current. He could feel where he and the cosmic Force met, interacting and joining in a bright, delicate dance. It seemed… faint, damaged.

"Try to grow that connection." Ahsoka watched him as his brow lined in concentration, a faint smile on her face. It seemed to be working, Anakin felt calmer and more at peace than he had in a long time. It wasn't true meditation yet, but it was a start. If he could shift his focus while meditating from his inner feelings to the Force around him… well, then there was hope. If they could do this, maybe they could retrain the other Sith nonsense Palpatine had burdened him with.

Anakin finally opened his eyes, tears threatening to betray him. "Ahsoka, thank you." He smiled in attempted levity, "When did you get so good at meditation?"

"Well, you know. I've had lots of time to practice."

And meditation is good for managing grief, She didn't say.

The next few weeks were relatively pleasant. Anakin seemed to recover from the incident without any lasting effects, and Ahsoka started to think that maybe everything was fine. He was improving physically, standing for longer stints and primarily using the chair to move the long distances from one part of the fleet to another. His scars were improving too. The change wasn't extreme yet, but they had faded slightly and the large raised scars on his face and head were less prominent.

He even wandered unasked back into Luke's training one day, and remained a fixture afterwards, watching from the sidelines or perhaps meditating in the awkward, cobbled-together fashion he and Ahsoka had managed to make work.

Han made good on his promise to show him the Falcon, and Ahsoka laughed at how Anakin exclaimed over it afterwards, describing every detail at painful length. Tours turned into work, with both men huddled together under some ancient hatch, arguing heatedly over the best way to repair a faulty piece of wiring.

R2D2 had been rebuilt, its repairs complete, and now it seemed to follow Anakin everywhere like the faithful pet it had been before. Luke considered protesting, but since he had stopped combat flying for the Rebellion he wasn't really in need of a navigator, and his Father clearly adored the old thing, so he said nothing about it.

Jedi training went on, but with a direct threat it had become more urgent, the focus on combat techniques and ensuring Luke would be ready for the surprise attack they were all certain was coming.

Alex stood in the mess, tray of food in his hands, craning his neck as he scanned for a free table where he could get some privacy. He had remained on the Ghost as long as he could, but today Hera had finally shooed him out, saying he was "getting underfoot" and "needed to go literally anywhere else."

The mess was pretty full with no free tables, so Alex looked around before spotting a quiet-looking, unassuming man in the corner, eating alone at an otherwise empty small table. Perfect.

He walked over and sat down, placing his tray in front of him.

The stranger gave him a pleasant look, holding out his hand to shake. "Hi. I'm Anakin Skywalker."

Alex's heart nearly stopped as he recognized the name. The black-clad demon he had been trying to avoid was seated right next to him, by his own choice.

His continued paralyzed silence seemed to be confusing Lord Vader, who retracted his hand and peered at him with a wrinkled brow and a concerned look, "What's your name?"

The ex-ISB agent just stared at him, like a mouse frozen in front of a snake.

Alex never could have told anyone what possessed him to say what he did next. He stared into the eyes of a creature that he had seen murder men for nothing, who could break him without even touching him, and whispered, "You killed Minister Tua."

He regretted saying it immediately, but there was strangely no anger in the monster's eyes, no threat, just an instant expression of deep sorrow and understanding that lined his forehead and turned his eyes even more piercing. "I am very sorry. Were you two close?"

Alex remembered the sweet, easily frightened woman, dead in an explosion he had planted on this fiend's orders. "No. Not at all."

Fathomless blue eyes stared at him, before the man finally spoke. "I… I don't know who that was. I… don't recognize the name. I am sorry. I have done many things in my life and I regret all of them." He paused. "You fear me, greatly. You were Imperial, weren't you?"

Lord Vader didn't remember who he was, that much was plain, and a mercy. It was possible that the creature had forgotten the events on Lothal entirely, in which case there was a chance that he might live through this. The demon was somehow even more terrifying out of the suit, if that was possible.

The former ISB agent silently debated whether to inform him of his defection. Either choice carried the risk of death. "What…what makes you think I was Imperial?" He asked hesitantly.

Those eyes slid over him with observant disinterest before the brute spoke. "The Rebels hate me, but they do not fear me in the same way the defectors do. You feel Imperial." He chuckled slightly. "Besides, I haven't met many Rebels with Coruscanti accents."

Alexandr Kallus wasn't certain how to respond to that. Thankfully he was saved from saying anything by the man rising from the table and returning to his chair. "Well, wish me luck. Ahsoka's arranged some sort of special training for Luke, so I'm finally going planetside again today. I can't wait." The man cracked a slight smile, and Alex relaxed as he realized he had simply wanted to talk to someone and response was not necessary.

He was left with more questions than before as Lord Vader moved off and exited the mess.

Lothal was primarily composed of plains and grasslands, with a few hills rising here and there to break up the monotony of the landscape. A brisk wind rolled across the whispering grasslands, almost like watching a sea toss and roil from undercurrents beneath the waves. It had been free of Imperial control for over five years now and had thankfully already largely recovered from Thrawn's razing.

A young armored woman with short blue and red hair stood in the ocean of grass, a helmet held under her arm as she watched them disembark, "Welcome to Lothal." She said with a smile.

Ahsoka smiled back and Luke nodded a quiet greeting. He remembered the Mandalorian woman from the mission to Gamorra, and remembered her impressive shooting at the end of it. "Hey, Mando'a!" He said, hoping that he was remembering the greeting correctly. Judging by her expression, he thought it was possible that he had.

Sabine's gaze slid past them as a third individual ducked out of the ship and down the plank, a scarred, fine-featured, incredibly tall man she didn't recognize. "Who's this?"

"This is Anakin Skywalker, Luke's father. He's supposed to get out in the sun sometimes, so we brought him with us." Ahsoka seemed to be watching her carefully, waiting for her reaction to the remnants of the Emperor's attack dog.

Sabine smiled, "He's kinda cute."

Ahsoka grinned in amusement when Anakin looked utterly confused and not a little concerned for the young woman's sanity.

"I have a place all picked out for our training. I know you all have to get back this evening, but I think we can make this quick." She smirked at Luke, "That is… if you're everything your Master said."

He smiled shyly in response, looking over at Ahsoka as if surprised by her praise.

Sabine continued as they started following her towards their destination, "It's been a while since I dragged out the Jedi-specialized stuff, but I've checked and it all still works."

Luke found that rather concerning. "Why do you have Jedi-specialized gear?"

"Long story." was the completely unsatisfactory reply. "I still wish I had a slug-caster, Jedi can't repel them… but they are way harder to find than blasters, and not cheap at all. Otherwise, though, I think I have a pretty good set."

She guided them to a low place set between several hills, a location that, unknown to any of the Jedi, she had trained in before with Kanan and Ezra. It had proven a good training ground then, and Sabine had thought to reuse it.

They got straight to work, demonstrating and practicing different ways to counter Jedi-hunters specifically, and a couple of hours later Luke and Sabine were sparring well.

"Luke, roll!" Ahsoka called out towards them. The difference between different dodges and the correct times to use each were simple, but she knew drilling them into one's subconscious was more difficult. Such things had to be instinctual, one needed to dive to the ground or flip back without a single thought of doing anything else.

Unfortunately, they didn't have months to train and drill. They had as long as it took for the bounty hunter to find them again. They all knew they had been lucky on Rishi. Han was certain she had planned to kill him once she had Luke's location, and only Chewie's lucky appearance had prevented torture and death.

There was no guarantee that Luke would have anyone with him when she found him, nor did they know precisely how good her training was. The boy needed to be ready for anything.

Sabine flew up again, bracing herself in the air with her stance before firing off another series of shots. Luke finally hit the ground this time, rolling forward out of the way and rising with his lightsaber still ready before immediately blocking several remaining shots.

Ahsoka breathed a sigh of relief. He was improving. This would work.

But now that he was doing well with the Mandalorian's normal fighting, it was time to throw the next step at him.

"Sabine, catch!" Ahsoka yelled as she threw her lightsaber. The armored woman caught it in midair and instantly dived for her partner, lighting it just before landing with both feet kicking his chest.

Luke flew back from the force of the blow, landing on the ground hard enough to drive the air from his lungs. He swung his saber up to block just as Sabine aimed a blow at his face. The sabers locked, hissing and sizzling as their energy beams connected.

"Seriously?" Luke said, "You too? Just how many secret Jedi are there?!"

The woman chuckled as she knelt over him, legs on either side of his prostrate form holding him to the ground. "Oh, I'm not a Jedi, I just know how to kick a Jedi's ass!"

"Really?" Luke asked, grinning mockingly as he picked up a bit more of the attitude of this new, rough-and-tumble almost street-style form of dueling he was just starting to get used to. He executed something Ahsoka couldn't quite see with his legs, flipping her over his head before scrambling back to his feet. "You don't seem to be doing so well to me."

Sabine shrugged. "I had a good master. And he didn't go easy on me like yours does."

Luke was a fast learner and adjusted quickly to new things when he had a reference. He would do fine.

Looking around, Ahsoka suddenly realized she couldn't see Anakin anywhere. Concerned, she reached out in their bond and finally felt him nearby.

Luke's lightsaber hissed off as she turned to leave, followed by Sabine's somewhat slower reflexes.

"Where are you going?" He asked, sounding concerned and a bit confused.

"I need to deal with something." She told them. "You're doing great. Just keep going, and I'll be back in a minute." She saw the lightsabers flicker back to life, then Sabine flew up into the air and tried to trap his arms with an energy rope integrated in one gauntlet. Luke flipped out of the way as Ahsoka turned from them.

She followed Anakin's feeling in the Force to where he sat on a hilltop, barefoot, his boots and socks beside him and one hand caressing a fistful of grass as he stared off at the plains and clouds.

"Hey." She sat down beside him, smiling at him when he glanced down at her face.

"It's peaceful here." He said, seeming to feel a need for explanation. "I never imagined how good a breeze would feel. Or how beautiful the colors would be." Anakin paused. "It's been so long since I felt grass or dirt. It even… smells better than I could have imagined." He looked at her, his lips slightly curved in a quiet proud smile. "Luke's doing well. He has improved greatly since Endor."

"He has. He's very talented and he works hard. You know, he spends most of his free time practicing? I sure didn't have the patience for that."

They sat for a minute in companionable silence before he finally broke it, his brow furrowing as a troubled shadow flited across his face. "I was… having trouble… watching the fighting. It was… getting harder to hold on. Something about violence, even fake violence… it… makes the darkness stronger."

Ahsoka reached out and comfortingly touched his hand. She knew something of the voices that whispered to him, urging him to kill, the terrible uncontrolled rage and yearning for blood that he couldn't seem to shake. She hated to think that her attempts to bring him back into the Jedi, to make him feel included and a part of things, had made those voices louder. He had been doing better since the last incident when he collapsed in the training room, but clearly he was still struggling.

Anakin seemed to understand her unspoken apology, as his hand wrapped around hers and squeezed slightly, his brilliant eyes briefly meeting hers as he returned her quiet smile.

Ahsoka spoke, releasing his hand and preparing to leave. "Take all the time you need. If you're not back by the time we're done, I'll come get you."