Reds Nightmarish Hell

I wake up in a cold sweat, sitting up I look around my darkened room, breathing heavily, I get up and walk to the bathroom hoping that my parents didn't wake. I walk into the bathroom and stand before the mirror. Looking at myself, I didn't recognize that person in the mirror. Sunken eyes, hollow cheeks, bags under the eyes, empty eyes, no smile, I realized that I'm not myself, that I have changed. The nightmares take its toll on my mind and on my body. I feel tire, worn out both physically and emotionally. I feel like I can't do this anymore, that I can't keep waking up in the middle of the night. Waking up terrified of the monsters in my head. I want the nightmares to I go away.

I want to be able to talk about the monsters in my head but I can't. I can't talk to my parents because I have to keep being a power ranger a secret. I can't talk to my teammates, my friends because I'm the leader. I'm supposed to be strong. I'm supposed to be the strong leader, the one who is able to handle anything that comes their way, the one everyone looks to for guidance. I cannot burden them with my nightmares. I could go to Zordon, but I don't want him to think that I can't handle the pressure, I don't want him to see me being weak. I don't know who to talk too. I look in the mirror, I look in my eyes, seeing the pain and the hurt, the fear, terror, horror of my nightmares reflecting back at me. I don't recognize myself anymore and I wonder whether my friends have noticed anything. I walk around like a zombie, I go through the day in my head, I just feel alone even with everyone around.

I leave the bathroom, going down to the kitchen to get a glass of water. I look out into the darkness of the night, the stars shining brightly, the moon hanging overhead, illuminating the streets below, the trees swaying softly going with the wind, a calmness settle over the street. The breeze gently going through, reflecting my mood, the chaos of the leaves blowing, the gentle hitting of branches against each other, making noise. Chaos, it is what I feel, what I am. Not knowing what to do, where to go, who to talk to, how to move on or why I can't stop the nightmares.

I finish my glass of water while I was deep in my thoughts, the darkness outside was turning into a gentle grey, knowing that the morning dawn is fast approaching which means that his parents were going to wake up so I take my glass back to the kitchen and head back up to my room where I lay down without closing my eyes so that the nightmares won't come again, waiting until my parents come to tell me that I need to wake up for school. Schooling my dace into the perfect mask like I've been doing for weeks so that no one knows that I'm drowning in my fears, in my nightmares.