"The Fourth Wall Camera is set up." Reborn announced triumphantly, standing atop of a rather normal looking filming camera.

"Great, where are the others?" Daiki huffed.

"They'll be here soon."

Daiki grumbled loudly as he crossed his arms, looking around the Sawada's living room, annoyingly used to its shape by now. His cup clinked loudly as ice dropped, slowly melting in the juice given to him by Nana on the insistence that it was getting too hot to go without one. Reborn had called them here, for whatever reason, and Daiki was forced to answer, having being almost physically dragged here by the baby himself.

"You're thinking about me." Reborn hummed from his new perch on an armchair, reserved for his use only and an item that was not native to the room.

"I'm thinking about how annoying you are, Reborn-san." He grunted, before a bang shook the walls.

There was a spike in noise as the others arrived, Tsuna's scratch a familiar ring as the laughter and shouts of the rest melded into the mass. Feet hit the floor in a constant beat before Takeshi turned the corner, arms behind his head in a lazy fashion as he grinned full force at the Storm's rage.

"Shujin-kun!" The Rain cheered, spotting his partner almost immediately.

"Hello, love." The other hummed, already moving his arm to allow for the other to cuddle up to his side.

Ryohei let out a booming greeting, dropping down on the other side of the Rain and letting out a long sigh of relief. Chrome came in next, very unsure of her surroundings but zeroing in on the familiar boy and scuttling over in fast, small steps.

"Good afternoon, Daiki-kun." She greeted softly, grasping the small portion of trident.

"Afternoon, Chrome-chan. Come sit with us."

"Yeah, c'mon!" Takeshi laughed, Ryohei making room at the end of their claimed couch.

The seating arrangement so far was pretty linear, with the way going Gokudera and Tsuna on a separate couch then jumping over to Daiki, Takeshi, Ryohei and Chrome. Though, no one had any doubts that other Guardians would be spawning into existence when plot so needed them.

"Why is Yamaguchi-san here?!" Tsuna yelped, snapping his eyes to the baby hitman who sipped leisurely.

"I called him here." He answered simply.

"Why?!"

"I sympathise." Daiki grunted, getting a gentle laugh from his partner, his mood soothed a bit by the noise.

"To answer questions, of course."

A dark bowl was placed on the coffee table in front of them, high rim containing an amount of paper slips, all rolled and neatly sealed to avoid a biased pick.

"Apocolypsebutterfly. This question is for Daiki, when will people start figuring out your true gender 3:?:0
And/Or secondly, and this is the most important question, when will YOU figure out what gender your most comfortable being 3:?:0'" Ryohei blinked after he finished reading the message, turning to look at his brother who had fallen into a icy silence.

"Bro, what's going on there?"

"I actually don't know." Daiki answered, shrugging as he stole the piece of paper and looked it over. "Mm, maybe a mistranslation?"

"Haha, maybe! But since it's there, answer it!" Takeshi laughed, leaning up against his side. "Daiki-kun, what is your true gender?"

"Hm, wouldn't you like to know?" The older huffed playfully, squeezing the arm around the smaller's waist before placing the piece of paper face down on the coffee table between them. "Considered it answered as: Impending."

"Next question!" Reborn chirped, a gleam in his eye as he looked to the Yamaguchi boy.

"Kagewolf25 asks: I was just wondering if her mum and dad will get karma for what they've done?"

"Ah..." Gokudera hummed, pulling a wad of paper from his bag, flipping through it quickly before putting it back, his friends around him giving him baffled looks. "It says there's something planned."

"What does that mean?" Daiki asked, narrowing his eyes.

The Storm shrugged and brushed off the hostility.

"Hell if I know, fuckin' giant."

"Guess it's Daiki-kun's turn to read then." Takeshi laughed loudly, trying to up the mood again as he handed his partner a piece of paper from the bowl.

"Okay," The Sun smiled, taking it carefully and unfurling the piece. "DragonClanMaster, 1. Is Mukuro going to continuously flirt with Daiki? It's honestly rather funny, but it gets annoying if there is too much."

There was a stiff silence that was a mixture of 'what the hell' and 'what the fuck', the poor Mist girl upping the rate of her fiddling as eyes turned on her with varying intensity. The Sun began to gently pet and coo at his husband, the arm around his waist keeping him stationary and tame as Chrome moved further into the other Sun's silhouette.

"Mukuro-sama is just lonely, he finds Daiki-kun's reactions funny so he may poke about every now and again. I don't think he's trying to do any real damage." She supplied, before pausing and going over her words again. "I don't think."

"He'll get bored eventually. Probably. Hopefully." The Yamaguchi tacked on, getting a huffed nod from his fiance and a deflation from the Mist.

"2. Are the Watanabe cousins going to find out Daiki is a- Yeah, no. The answer is a good ol' 'no'."

"Guest. I hope you don't mind but I have a few questions like,
1. What is going on with Daiki's mom? I remember a few chapters ago she was like walking around with a knife and he no longer trusts Lambo to be alone with her?"

Takeshi's voice tapered as he read this, fingers twitching for his katana handle.

"2. What does Tsuna think of Daiki? Every time I read their interactions, it sounds like Tsuna has some little puppy crush on him?"

Tsuna very carefully did not look into the couple's direction, sweating profusely. "S-sorry..."

Takeshi pursed his lips, the grip on the paperslip almost too strong. "Daiki-kun, I have questions, and two, Tsuna-san… I don't even know. It's just a puppy crush… Right?"

"Yamamoto-kun!" Tsuna yelped. "Of course!"

"Well," the Rain turned to his fiancé, ignoring Tsuna's protests. "I am very sure I am going to be one of the In-Law haters."

("I am not going to steal Daiki from you, I swear!")

Daiki grimaced. "She's my mother, darling."

("Hey, are you even listening?" "Tch… So much disrespect.")

"Bo-kun could just stay at mine, every thought about that? I am here for you, Daiki-kun."

("Does this mean I am off the hook? Hello?" "IT'S NO USE TO THE EXTREME, SAWADA-SAN! THEY ARE HAVING A MOMENT.")

Daiki buried his face in Takeshi's shoulder, ears red despite his tan. Somewhere, Gokudera gagged. Hibari stayed gagged and tied to his chair, struggling and murdering with his eyes, and Lambo was focused on his Lollipop. Tsuna just threw his head upwards to the ceiling.

Chrome fiddled with the hem of her skirt and mumbled:

"Bookloverinfinity asks: Will we ever see the projection of Daiki's past self?"

"I DIDN'T HEAR YOU TO THE EXTREME!"

"My ears hurt..." Whimpered Tsuna, curling into a ball on his stool. He silently cursed his seating position.

"BOSS I'LL HELP YOU! OI, TURFTOP! LET'S TAKE THIS OUTSIDE!"

[Shouting, explosions, and murmured nothings from the couple in the background.]

Chrome slipped the ball of misery the other pod of her earbuds.

"Will anyone find out about Daiki's rebirth?" Laid on the ground, almost unnoticed. Reborn stared impassively at it.

[Sounds of struggling and muffled death threats, loud eating, two balls of misery bonding over music, explosions, shouting, and non-PG-rated stuff behind the curtain.]

The No.1 Hitman took another slip from the pile. "Why do you keep torturing poor Daiki?"

Takeshi's head snapped up from their couple-y activities, emerging from the background. "Did I just hear 'torture' and 'Daiki' in a sentence? Who- Ack!"

He was interrupted by a tanned hand grabbing him by the collar, yanking him back.

"Is the revelation of Daiki's gender going to be important to an arc or cause plenty of conflict?"

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" The cracks from one of Gokudera's explosion spelled, but were soon demolished by another following.

Rebon was getting cranky. It was almost his naptime, and nothing was getting done here. He then saw another slip of paper sticking out of the small pile, and smirked,

"Is Daiki's sky Tsuna or Xanxus? Since Daiki was working with the varia in the future…"

Utter Silence. Even Kyoya stopped struggling, and strained to turn his head towards the curtains.

(Well, Tsuna and Chrome were still bobbing their heads to their music, but still.)

"No." Came the growl from the curtain. "I refuse that... asshole. When did that even happen?"

Apparently, that was good enough for the gang, and the noise level resumed. Reborn sighed.

Because his idiot student was still bobbing to the Mist's music, oblivious to his surroundings.

Clearly, he needed to up the tor-training.

#Q&Aquestions

What does the Varia think of Daiki (individually and collectively), both in the main universe and in the Daiki/Xanxus AU?

Is the fact that Daiki has already killed someone going to come up/be addressed later? The 10th gen's reactions would be delicious.

Somewhere, almost on the other side of the planet, a certain scarred alcoholic, with way too many adoring and obsessive followers, was shaking with rage.

"TRASH! ASSEMBLE!"

The underlings froze as the soundwaves reached them, and instantly made their way to the mess hall.

They were all standing in line, with their respective commanders waiting on stage. Mammon wasn't floating, which was the first thing that clued them in.

Along their lines of sight were some other, unbelievable, phantasmal phenomenons. Squalo was blank-faced. Bel was not slouching. Lussuria had not finished painting his nails, the sparkling gold coating only partially visible. Levi… was not glaring at them.

Shit Has Happened.

At last, the door was kicked open, although it was already open (how did that even work?), and Xanxus strut in, wine-red eyes staring through them, glowing.

He took his time to the podium behind his elements, each step measured and slow, but not relaxed by any means. It was the slow prowl of a tiger that could take off running for your ass any moment, because it was hella pissed for you looking at it wrong.

Someone tried to hold in a sneeze and failed, suspense is bad for your nasal reflexes.

[BANG]

Or your health. That someone wasn't Quality anyway, if they couldn't even hold in a sneeze.

In continued silence, the Varia Commander stalked up the steps, and leant himself on the podium. One could almost mistake it for lounging, were not the grips on his guns so tight.

"Trash," he drawled with too much teeth. "Which trash..."

Everybody straightened themselves a little more, even if it was thought impossible. It was unknown if they did that to prepare themselves for orders, or to flee and never come back.

"Which trash," he repeated himself, scanning the crowd. "Stuffed my bottle with paperslips, all containing the same two questions?"

Behind him, a powerpoint slide came into existence. On it stood:

"What does the Varia think of Daiki (individually and collectively), both in the main universe and in the Daiki/Xanxus AU?

Is the fact that Daiki has already killed someone going to come up/be addressed later? The 10th gen's reactions would be delicious."

There wasn't even so much of a blink. Or a breath. Someone was turning blue in the fourth row.

[BANG]

"Clean up the blue-faced trash."

Clearly, Xanxus was the smartest. If someone wasn't even passable Quality, then they must be a spy. Easy.

When the cleaning staff was called into the deathly silent messhall, they didn't even do so much as blink, merrily mopping the blood away with their headphones firmly secured, whistling "Be Our Guest" from Beauty and the Beast.

(They were the ones Xanxus was lenient to. Even he realized the pain of cleaning after him or removing blood from carpets, he just didn't care enough to change his ways. Being lenient to them was fair enough.)

"Ah," one of them suddenly stopped. "Apologies Boss, but I think I just destroyed the message."

Indeed, for the spilled blood of the two corpses only read: "An[smear]r [smear]he ques[smear]o[smear]! [smear]rry fo[smear]x-up, b[smear]'ll do ju[smear]fin[smear]"

Xanxus blinked.

The cleaning staff took it as a cue to continue with their job.

"Dismissed," he sighed and made his way into the meeting room.

Only when Xanxus and his commanders were gone, did the assembled dare to disperse.

…

"Okay, here's the plan," Lussuria gestured to the two large poster and crayons on the table. "We are going to answer the questions, because, clearly, we are the recipients. Nobody else is fabulous enough for it. And then, we're gonna burn the posters, because why the hell not. If they can spell a message from blood, then they should be able to decipher our answers from smoke."

"Makes sense," nodded Bel. "A suitable procedure for a prince, shishishishi."

Xanxus stared intently at the assembled crayons, and made a grab for the red ones. He held it in a manner reminiscent of a child, the crayon clenched in his fist as he scrawled angry lines across the page, taking up more room than was perhaps intended for his singular use, but fuck that he was the Boss.

"Ooh, what did Boss write?" Lussuria chirped, spinning the wad of paper to read it.

'He needs to get his fucking life together and should have come to the Varia.'

"Jeez, Boss, did you have to take up so much space? Now the prince only gets a fraction of what he deserves."

"HOW DARE YOU!" Hollered Levi, nose wrinkling in disgust. "IF THE BOSS DOESN'T WANT TO SHARE THEN HE DOESN'T HAVE TO-"

"Yeah, yeah." The Sun dismissed him, reaching for the golden crayon. It matched with his nails! Somewhat.

'Your big sis will gladly dispose of your eggdoner, free of charge! And your spermdoner, also free of charge! We could then go on a trip around the world with the inheritance left- or you could use the salary of the second-most fabulous Sun Officer. It'll pay for itself. And then we will go shopping all the time and I will squeal at the sight of you and your boyfriend when he sees you in the bikinis and sundresses! We will of course routinely make hunting trips for bigots, stress relief is very important! I can't wait to show you off to everyone! Love, Your Best Big Sis Ever.'

"You write it like he'll actually see it, Lussuria." Mammon sighed, an indigo crayon already orbiting their form.

"It's the thought that counts! When we burn it, he'll feel it in his heart!"

"He'll get fucking heartburn then!" Squalo shouted, huge voice drowning out the competition.

'You are a tall peasant, but that is fine, because the prince, yours truly, always needed a suitable piggy-backer. You're welcome, shishishishishi. Get your peasant ass here quicker, peasant.'

"Excessive use of 'peasant'." Mammon snorted.

"Oh yeah?" Bel waved dismissively with his hand. "Like you can do it better than the prince."

'You could be so profitable, but you are too troublesome. I do not have the time to waste on developing you. If you want to be a good investment, please make your own way here.'

"Less words, and no major repetitions. I am more efficient."

"You all need to be more heartfelt for my little sister!"

'You are a decent pile of messes, come here so the Boss and I can un-mess you.'

Lussuria blinked at him, thinning his lips at the Lightning.

"Define 'un-mess' and why it would require both Boss and you."

"Boss and I are the best for it."

Before the Sun could kick Levi's head in, Squalo snatched the sheet from their hands and aggressively dented the paper with his large strokes, almost rendering the other messages unreadable.

'FIGHT ME TRASHY SHITHEAD! HAHAHAHAHA! I WANT TO SEE HOW BAD YOU'LL BE BEATEN.'

Xanxus threw his crayons at Squalo, leaving red marks all over his hair and uniform. "Trash."

"VOOOOOOOOOIIIIIIIII! YOU ASSHOLE!"

This was the cue for the others to lunge at him for destroying their messages (and insulting the boss).

In the midst of the chaos, well Xanxus was lounging self-satisfied for being the cause of it, the second question was forgotten.

"Is the fact that Daiki has already killed someone going to come up/be addressed later? The 10th gen's reactions would be delicious."

Well, maybe it was for the better. The Varia's response would have been quite patronizing, and we do not want them killed due to overexposure from Skylarks or mindfuckery from a certain Mist User, who would greatly take offense, starting World War III.

Also, the plot was probably already in shreds due to this. No need to burn it too… Right?

…

"Oi, I think we forgot the second question, shishishishishi."

Xanxus looked to the fire place for a moment, before huffing and sinking into his throne more, a bit grumpy at the loss. He reached to the side table and plucked up his cup, took a sip, before sending it crashing against the Rain's thick head.

"Trash, get me some food."

"VVOOOOOIIII! You son of a bitch!"