"Oh my gosh! Why are you so wet?!"

Kazuma suddenly woke up and he hated it already; he was so done with life. His body hurt everywhere and he felt as though he had fought three Nevermores with his bear fists with only his underwear as armour. 'Wait, who's shaking me violently right now?' He opened his eyes slowly, afraid of seeing an Ursa about to tear him apart.

Nope.

Instead it was a blue-eyed blond girl who was dressed like a knight of old. 'She has a great figure, but there was something about her that put me off… what was it again?'

"Kazuma! Kazuma! How did you get so wet? Is this some sort of water play?! How does it feel to be covered in water whilst Grimm chase you?"

'Ah yes, I remember now.' Kazuma groan as he sat up, his head hurting. "It's your personality."

"What was that?" The knight, Darkness, asked.

"Nothing!" Kazuma quickly cut her line of thought off. He looked around, but didn't see Aqua or Megumin. "Uh, say, do you know where my partners are? You know the blue-haired girl and the loli with the staff?"

Darkness shrugged and helped him to his feet. "I don't know; all I saw was you lying unconscious on the ground, covered in water." Their eyes met. Blue stared into green.

"You're my partner now."

"WHAT!?"

Kazuma Perspective:

After I foun out that Darkness did not have a partner, I reluctantly accepted her help in finding Aqua and Megumin. She strode next to me, and I suppose that she had the basics of a good crusader.

A Beowulf charged at us, clearly intending to kill both Darkness and me. Just when I was ready to dodge, Darkness dashed forward to meet it.

She was brave, willing to put herself in danger for her comrades.

The Beowulf swiped at her, yet Darkness stopped it, parrying the strike with her forearm without flinching.

She was tenacious and tough; few attacks could hurt her; her armour was of good quality;

Suddenly another Beowulf jumped out of the bushes, and ran towards Darkness. Instead of running away, she held her ground.

She was steadfast; no amount of opponents would make her fear anything.

Darkness stood fast as the second Beowulf jumped at her. With a mere tiny effort, it was sent spinning away. It landed and turned around, snarling and licking its jaw. Darkness turned quickly, pushing back the first Beowulf again, making crash into the ground. It picked itself up and bared its teeth furiously at Darkness.

All of these would make her a good crusader. Unfortunately…

Darkness stiffened and hugged herself. "Kazuma, stay back! I wish to handle them!"

Unfortunately, the problem…

"They're looking at me with such hungry eyes, beasts whose lust is unchecked! AHHH!" Darkness twitched, even when the beowolves started to charge again.

The problem was HER FUCKING PERSONALITY!

Darkness charged forward, and met the two beasts head-on. I moved off to the side, so not to interrupt Darkness' battle…

The first beowolf swiped at her, causing a part of her sleeve to be cut. Her aura was turned off, and it was evident that she relied on her strange semblance to survive attacks.

'If her face is anything to go by, then she's probably excited to be squaring off the two grimm.'

Third person perspective

Sighing in disappointment at his third partner's quirks, Kazuma ran around the three beings. He drew his sword and charged at the closest grimm and thankfully for him, the beowolf didn't notice his charge until it was too late. The sword slid cleanly into the monster's back, but it still didn't die. It snarled in pained anger, and tried to slice his head off, but Kazuma ducked underneath the blow.

"Just die already!"

Electricity shot out of the crystal in Kazuma's hand, frying the beast. He ran past it as soon as it collapsed, disintegrating into the wind.

Darkness, on the other hand, was rather determined to make a fight such as this drag on as long as possible. It was an enemy that could not harm her, but instead just added to her… excitement.

"Yes! Attack me more, you foul beast!"

At this point in time Kazuma had stopped and was instead pondering on whether to not leave the clearly excitable blond knight to her games and instead go look for Aqua and Megumin. Fortunately, he didn't have to decide.

A jet of fire emerged from their side, engulfing the Beowulf completely. Kazuma and Darkness took a second to look at the burning grimm and then to the source of the flames. Darkness was disappointed that someone had killed her toy.

"Show yourself!"

Megumin strode out from the woods, a haughty look on her face. "Did you see how awesomely I killed the Beowulf Aqua?!" She twirled and slammed her staff into the ground.

"Clearly I'm the better huntress in training!"

"HMPH!" A pouting Aqua followed after Megumin. "No you're not; you're only good for head pats and explosions, you can't heal people or wash everything away like me!"

Kazuma and Darkness just stared at the arguing pair. 'Let's see how this pans out.' They unknowingly thought at the same time.

"NO I'M NOT GOOD FOR JUST THOSE THINGS!" Megumin retorted. "Besides, it's your fault that we lost Kazuma!"

"Uhhhh. Guys? I'm right here."

They blinked.

"KAZUMA!" They rushed over to him, the fires of rage burning deeply. "Do you know what she did?" They both shouted.

"Aqua washed away everything! Chomosuke and I almost drowned! I had to poke him out of a tree! My flamerthrower got wet!"

"Did you hear what she said about me? She called me a mere amateur priest who isn't anything special! How dare she?! Steal her eyepatch to get back at her!"

Kazuma stepped back from the onslaught of inconsequential bickering. "Before you go on arguing further, need I remind we're currently in the middle of a TEST!" His voice gradually increased in volume until he was actually shouting. "AND IF YOU CONTINUE BICKERING, THEN YOU WILL DRAW GRIMM TO OUR LOCATION!"

Aqua and Megumin cowed in front of the angry male. Darkness twitched in jealously as she imagined herself being shouted at by Kazuma.

As if he heard her thoughts, Kazuma turned to her with a look of utmost disgust on his face. "Oi, Darkness, snap out of it; we have to go before grimm get here." Sighing for the nth time that day, Kazuma realised he had no idea where they were.

"Hey guys, do anyone here know where we are?" He looked at Aqua, who bowed her head,, knowing that it was her fault that they were in this mess.

"I could check." Darkness helpfully offered, unfurling both of her wings (She was pleasantly surprised when none of the trio recoiled in disgust). Kazuma nodded in approval. "Great then, look for something that looks like a temple. It should be near a cliff's base."

Darkness nodded and lifted off with a strong flag of her white wings. "Aqua." Said person perked up. "What did I tell you about sacred create water?'

"I shouldn't use it when people are nearby." Aqua mumbled under her breath.

"What was that?"

"I shouldn't use it when people are nearby." She spoke louder this time, her head bowed.

"And what did you do?"

"I used Sacred create water."

Kazuma chopped her over her head. With a cry of pain, Aqua crouched on the floor. Looking down on the crying girl, he turned to the next person. "Wipe that smug smile off of your face, Megumin."

She gulped at Kazuma's expression. "Ah- I- I was just"

She stopped speaking after Kazuma's dead fish eyes scared her speechless. "Because of you." Kazuma finally spoke, slowly raising his hand to eye level.

Her eye followed Kazuma's hand; gulping in fear of what he would do. "Because of you, WE'RE IN THIS MESS!"

His hand darted forward, grabbing and pulling Megumin's eyepatch. "OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW!" Megumin could do nothing but cry out in pain as her precious eyepatch was pulled. "PLEASE DON'T PULL SO HARD ON MY EYEPATCH IT'S GONNA BREA-OUCHIE!" She recoiled as the eyepatch slammed back into place.

"Don't EVER a flamethrower without caution!" Kazuma warned the girl.

And it was at this point that Darkness returned. "Hey Kazuma I found what you –" She abruptly stopped talking when she saw the crying pair. Her face lit up in a blush that Kazuma found suspicious. "As expected of you Kazuma!"

"What?"

"I leave alone with two girls for a minute and the next time I see them they're on the ground crying!" She hugged herself in joy. "What wonders did you do to them to make them cry like that?!"

"YOU'VE MISUNDERTOOD!"