ATTENTION, ATTENTION, this is a safety warning. Please put your seatbelts on, angst is approaching. *grabs combat helmet and puts it on*

I may have tortured the fabulous Emily and her fresh shipper heart by making her beta this... so everyone clap for her! A big Thank You to Em :)

(1850 Words)

In The Blink Of An Eye

When you wake up in the morning and turn over under the warm blanket with a groan, wanting nothing more to fall asleep again, you never consider that this might be your last morning. Nobody ever seems to consider that it only takes a tiny twist of fate for a particular morning to become your last one – I guess we tend to suppress thoughts like that because we would be too afraid to properly live. On the other hand, doesn't the knowledge that our life could end any moment make us live that bit more consciously? Live every moment like it's your last is a common saying.

Some people do that, I guess, but not me, even though I saw a lot of death in my job. Had I considered that it could be the last kiss I'd give Noah when dropping him off at daycare that morning, I would have held him in my arms longer, so that he would never forget the feeling.

I would have taken the time to tell my squad and Rafael how glad I am to have them as my friends and colleagues, and how proud I am of them, and so much more.

However, I didn't do that, because when I rolled out of bed I thought that it would be just another day on the job.

But as I said, everything can be over in the blink of an eye.

And fate doesn't care how many things you still want to do, and how many things haven't been said yet, just because you didn't have the courage to voice them.

OoO

At first, it felt like her body had gone numb and time had stopped.

Olivia was standing there, looking at the man, at the gun that was still aiming at her, seeing how a white smoke wafted from the barrel. Her body was slowly falling backwards, and she looked down, asking herself where the growing, red stain on her blouse had suddenly come from. It all seemed so surreal, and she didn't really understand what was going on here...

As her feet left the solid ground, she heard familiar voices scream, but they were muffled, as if they were far away, and she assumed that she was dreaming. Of course, this could only be a dream, because her body didn't seem to exist to her...

For a moment, she was in the air, seeing the cloudy sky above her, and remembered how excited Noah had been this morning when thick, white flakes had fallen down from this very sky... Noah... surely it was time to wake him soon...

Her back impacted on something that gave away, and suddenly, she was violently ripped out of her daze. A wet cold engulfed her, forced the air out of her lungs, and with wide eyes, she saw the surface of the Hudson River splash above her. The freezing water immediately soaked her clothes and pulled her down.

Tiny, silvery bubbles left her mouth, and though the water of the river wasn't the clearest, she could see how the bubbles were mixing with vapours of red...

And then she became aware of the pain.

It seemed like a thousand needles mercilessly pricked into the skin all over her body, mingling with the sharp, throbbing sensation at her stomach. Olivia needed an endless moment before she realised that she was bleeding, that she'd been shot...

But she didn't have the strength to panic.

In fact, her body wasn't reacting to any of the orders she gave it – not even her fingers moved, even though she wanted them to.

Almost curiously, she watched the last bubbles disappear in the thickening cloud of bloody water and she sank into the darkness, her eyes closing slowly...

OoO

If there was one thing Rafael Barba thoroughly hated, then it was Christmas shopping with his mother. Lucia Barba, on the other hand, loved to force her son to take a whole morning off so she could degrade him from Assistant District Attorney to her bag carrier. She did that every year, and she bought a lot of presents for anyone who was more or less related to them, and all Rafael could do was grit his teeth and obey.

This time, she also felt the desire to do some shopping for herself, and so he ended up sitting on a couch in front of the changing rooms of a boutique, commenting on every dress his mother tried on – and there were a lot of dresses in the boutique. While Lucia worked her way into dress number nineteen, Rafael got up from the couch to stretch his legs a bit. He was just loosening his tie with a sigh as his gaze fell onto a jewellery display, and guessing that it wouldn't do any harm to have a look – anything was better than sitting on his ass – he stepped closer.

A simple silver bracelet woke his interest; one could buy countless charms for it, turning every bracelet into something unique, and without thinking twice, he bought the bracelet and four of the tiny charms – a snowflake, a flower, a star and a heart made out of tiny ornates. As he walked back to the couch, slipping his wallet back into his pocket, Lucia was already standing there in another dress, a knowing grin on her face.

"I think I know for whom this is," she said, a little bit smug, and he glared at her, separating the fourth charm from the others. He looked down at it for a moment, and Lucia sat down next to him, sighing. "When are you finally going to tell her?"

"I don't know," he replied curtly, then he let the heart charm disappear into the breast pocket of his suit. "This colour doesn't suit you at all, mamì."

Lucia gently patted her son's shoulder before leaving him alone again. Rafael was glad that she refrained from telling him once again that she didn't like to see how he kept his feelings for Olivia hidden from the world. He loved her, had for quite some time now, but somehow he couldn't bring himself to tell her. Maybe because he was afraid of losing her as a friend if she didn't return his feelings... Or because love and everything that had to do with it was the only thing in life that Rafael Barba wasn't confident in.

"Now, how's this?" Lucia's voice ripped him from his thoughts, and he was rather thankful for that. A grin stole its way onto his face as he saw her, and then they both started to laugh. Lucia was wearing a monster of a gold, completely sequined dress that clung to her, and she seemed to enjoy how ridiculous it was.

Suddenly, his phone rung, and Rafael's expression turned from amused to irritated as he saw the name on the screen.

"Detective Tutuola, what can I do for you?"

And within the next few seconds, it seemed like the whole world came crashing down on him, ripping him out of the life he'd been living moments earlier. It only took a few rushed words from Fin to completely change everything.

OoO

A loud, steady noise made her ears ring, breaking through the darkness, and she faintly felt how rushed hands touched her, and from far far away, voices seeped into her consciousness, but they also faded as quickly as they'd come. She vaguely remembered the cold, the darkness... but now, it was all warm, the darkness seemed inviting, and she could spot a tiny light flickering in the distance, like a candle in the wind. Something pulled her towards it, and she let it happen, feeling happiness flood her insides.

It was as if somebody was taking her hand, and she could hear a laugh that was unmistakably Noah's, a tender 'Liv' from Rafael... to her it felt as if somebody was wrapping her in a blanket of comforting memories, and she wasn't afraid anymore...

Suddenly, a harsh force shot through her body and cold, clammy hands grabbed her, pulling her backwards. For a second, she couldn't breathe, and the pain returned, stronger than it had been before. She didn't want this, she wanted to go back to the comfort...

"Again, 250!" These two words echoed through the darkness, but she couldn't make sense of them.

And then, the force was there again, taking her breath away for the second time, shaking her, and all she wanted was for it to stop...

But she couldn't do anything, she was too weak to work against it, and then she faded back into the cold.

OoO

When Rafael and Lucia had arrived at the hospital, he still felt like he was in trance. The people, the conversations... everything seemed so far away, and all he could do was stand there and stare blankly, his heart aching while everybody around him was discussing what had happened.

Only snippets really reached him, forming the picture of a nightmare that had become real.

"Two bullets..."

"Hypothermia."

"Heavy blood loss."

"She barely had a pulse when I pulled her out..."

"I called Lucy to pick Noah up."

"They don't know if she'll make it."

"She wasn't breathing..."

"The nurse said they had to reanimate her several times..."

"Hit in the stomach."

"The Hudson River was barely above the freeze point..."

Rafael could feel how his chest tightened painfully, he suddenly had trouble breathing... His blood was rushing in his ears as his legs slowly started to move, carrying him away from the small group of Detectives. He was like a sleepwalker, barely registering what was happening all around him as he let his legs take him away from the place.

Oblivious to how much time had passed and how much distance he'd crossed, he stood in front of the door to Olivia's apartment, hearing Noah crying inside as he knocked. Lucy's face mirrored his distress as she let him inside without a single word; tears were gleaming in the young woman's eyes.

Slowly, the numbness inside him started to fade as he sat down on the floor where Noah was kneeling, completely ignoring his toys – it seemed like the boy was sensing that something was wrong. His eyes were puffy and red and he was still crying as Rafael carefully pulled him onto his lap, gently starting to rock.

As he started to whisper soothing words, small fingers grabbed his tie and his shirt, holding on to him as the sobs faded, and Rafael closed his eyes, exhaling a shaky breath. Tears were burning in his eyes, but he held them back. He couldn't do anything for Olivia, but he could do what she would want in this situation – be there for Noah.

And the little boy's presence soothed him too; it was as if he gave him the opportunity to hold on to a part of Olivia.