New computer...meant cleaning up the old one and this one had slipped through the cracks somehow. Hope you like it? Adam and Kim try to talk to Oliver about Adam's anxiety and mental health issues.

"Mom, Adam's here." Oliver called out. She had been a bit jittery all morning waiting for him to come over. They had decided not to tell Oliver he was coming in case he changed his mind. Even though Kim pushed him to do this and thought it was the right thing it was still up to Adam whether they told Oliver or not.

"Come and sit down Buddy." She grabbed his hand and led him into the lounge. "We want to talk to you."

Adam started. "Did you enjoy yesterday?"

"I did. Did you?"

"I really did. It was nice to meet your friends and some other Dads." He sat next to Kim and reached over her to pat Oliver's knee. "Can I talk to you about something?"

Oliver nodded and held his Mom's hand tightly. "You aren't leaving are you?"

"No Oliver, I'm not going anywhere. I love being here but you do know it's not easy for me some days."

"Why?"

"Oliver all those years I wasn't here, they were tough, really tough and things happened, some of those things weren't very nice and I hurt people that didn't deserve to be hurt, including your Mom. I was told I had to leave everything and everyone I loved and never see them again and I didn't even get to say goodbye and that's not a nice thing to have happen and for a long time I had to pretend I was someone else, not being able to even find out if your Mom was okay was really hard. I really struggle with that some days."

"But you didn't mean it. You didn't want to hurt Mom."

"No I didn't, I never wanted to hurt your Mom. I didn't want to hurt anyone."

"Oliver, you know how sometimes you get nervous and worried about things. You feel a little out of control and don't know how to fix it or stop yourself?" Kim waited until Oliver nodded. "That's called anxiety and it feels very real and frightening sometimes. Sometimes Adam feels like that."

"But you help me feel better when I am scared like that, you can help Adam feel better too." He looked from his Mom to Adam and back to his Mom again. "I can help."

"Of course you can help, you are helping. Everyday. There are lots of people who want to help Adam through this, and we will."

"Okay."

"It's not always as easy though Oliver, it takes me a little time some days. I may need to be alone, I may need to go away for a few hours, or a day or perhaps..."

"You can't leave." Oliver burst into tears. "I don't want you to leave." He was hysterical and climbing over his Mom to hang onto Adam. Both of them held onto him trying to comfort him and get him to calm down and listen. "Please don't go."

"Oliver, I'm not going anywhere."

"You're my Dad, please stay. You just got here." Ollie was quite happy to tell people that Adam was is Dad but he still called him Adam. Some days he was okay with that, even being acknowledged as Oliver's Dad was enough, and some days he just wished he called him Dad.

Adam was starting to freak out; Kim could feel him beside her. He was spinning, he didn't want to talk to Oliver yet but Kim was right, Oliver was going to worry and they needed to explain this to him. Fearing that he was about to get up and leave Kim grabbed his hand to hold him steady as she pushed Oliver into Adam's arms. He clung to his Dad for dear life. They needed each other and Kim had to show both of them how much.

"Oliver, I promise you I am not going away. I am here talking to you today, with your Mom because I want you to know how much I love you and I want to stay here and be your Dad. I want you to help me though. Can you help me?"

"Tell me what to do?"

"Exactly what you are doing. We are having fun aren't we? We are just going to keep doing this."

"I want to help, I will try harder."

"You don't need to try harder Ollie." Adam reassured him. "But on those days I feel bad I want to be able to say to you that I don't feel so great just so you know and don't worry."

"What if I do something wrong? What if I make you sad? What if it's my fault?"

"Nothing about this is your fault Oliver." Kim rubbed his back softly. "It's not anything you do or me or even anything Adam does, sometimes it just happens. I know they talk to you at school about mental health."

"But those people kill themselves." He cried painfully.

"Not all the time Oliver. Sometimes that does happen but that's not what this is about. I don't feel like that at all, I love being here with you and your Mom too much and Daisy too." Adam's voice was shaking and he was beside himself; he never wanted it to go in this direction. Even when he was at his lowest, living the life of someone he hated he never thought about ending it all. That felt like the coward's way out and he'd made his bed and had to lie in it. This was his punishment and as painful as it was he'd rather live it than give in. "I talk to you everyday and I always will, that helps me. Can we keep doing that?"

"I can."

"And, about today. I loved coming with you today and it was nice meeting your friend's Dads but Ollie I really don't like talking about why I wasn't here. Not to strangers, it's hard enough talking to your Mom about it so while I want to be part of your life, right now I need to keep that to ourselves. Does that make sense? Just for a little while."

"Okay." He didn't really understand but he would do anything they asked him at the moment.

"Is there anything else you want to ask us?" Kim wiped away her own tears as well as her son's. He was still leaning on Adam and it was sweet to see him hold his Dad's hand. "You know you can talk to me or Adam at anytime. You can also talk to Pops or Al, they understand how hard this is for Adam. If you feel more comfortable talking to them that's okay but we'd really like you to talk to us. That's why we wanted to tell you today so you know and understand what's going on and we want you to feel safe and that it's okay to talk to us if you are worried."

"Can you stay here today Adam?" Oliver looked at his Dad. "I want to know you are okay."

"No place I'd rather be." Adam relaxed a little. "How about we go out and do something fun?"

"No, I want to stay home with you and Mom." It probably bought Adam and Kim closer together than they were prepared for. They watched a movie together, Oliver was wedged in between them and Adam rested his head on Kim's shoulder while Oliver's was tucked up underneath his chin and after the emotional carnage the morning thrust upon them spending the day at home was the best thing they did. Oliver needed to feel safe and he felt safe here with his parents.

They did have some fun though, they played twister. Adam had told him that he used to play it with Kim all the time, he left out the naked part but the way Kim blushed he knew she remembered and he just winked at her. Oliver had jumped up and dragged it out of the cupboard before Kim could protest.

Having Adam so close was a confusing mix of pleasure and pain. Oliver was oblivious though, he just laughed when Adam pretended to fall and take Kim down with him so that she was lying on top of him. He closed his eyes momentarily and dreamed of times long past when this was just the beginning.

The sweetest moment came though when Adam was just sitting quietly while Kim was making dinner. It had been an emotional day but they'd done it and in the wash up it felt like he was carrying one less heavy burden on his own. It was a little confusing the power Kim had over him, the ability to get him back in balance, to pull him up when he needed saving. He didn't want to rely on her but he had too, if he wanted to make this work he needed all the help he could get.

And then this boy; this incredible little boy who was such a big part of his crazy life just hit him between the eyes. He slipped his arms around Adam's neck from behind. "I love you Adam. I'm glad you came back, I'm glad you are my Dad."

"Oh Oliver, you have no idea." He took a deep steadying breath while his son rested his head on his shoulder and he held his hands tightly against his chest. "I love you too. More than I think you know."