Duo: Did you even sleep?

Spoot: What is this sleeps you speak?

Heero: That's a no.

You

"What the fuck am I doing here…" Duo muttered from his gundam.

"Hopefully trying to win a battle?" Quatre said, adding a giggle from his gundam.

"I should be god damn fucking at home!" Duo's voice came again, "Hilde just had a fucking kid…you know I didn't even get to hold her yet?! You know that?!"

"While we feel for you Duo, please try and stay focused." Came Heero's monotone voice from his gundam.

From inside his gundam, Duo frowned and tapped the intercom button, shutting it off. "Yeah yeah." He muttered to himself as he sat back, crossing one leg over the other. "Oh maaaan…I should be at home…" He said to himself, voice shaking a bit. He put his hands behind his head and looked up with his eyes. He just stared at a fuzzy grey picture of an ultrasound Hilde had given him two weeks prior. She just gave birth to their daughter, but before he could even get to the hospital to see his two girls, he was shipped off once again.

Suddenly it hit him. The fact that he didn't get to see his kid come into the world. The fact that he couldn't be with Hilde at that very second. The fact that he missed the birth. The fact that there was a god damn war going on. He didn't notice he was crying until he saw the little droplets float by his face. He sat up a little and swiped them around with his fingers, adding a laugh. "I gotta get it together…" He muttered then wiped his hand on his shirt. He was about to do just that, and get back in the battle, when his ear just about exploded!

"MAXWELL GOD DAMN IT GET YOUR ASS IN GEAR!"

"GOD?" Duo yelped as he sat up, flailing a little bit out of surprise.

"Who the fuck else would it be?! Think you idiot! Who else has a direct line to your ear uinit?!"

"Wuuuuu….fei?"

"God damn right." And like that, communication was cut. Duo giggled and tapped on the intercom button on the dash of his gundam. "Heeeeeyyyy! Sorry guys I had to drop the Cosby kids at the pool."

"That's Racist." Came Quatre's scolding tone.

"Rice Crispies are racist too…" Trowa muttered, finally choosing that moment to speak for the first time that day. Quatre sighed, and was most likely shaking his head or rubbing his face. After a second he spoke to Trowa calmly. "What do you mean Trowa…." Quatre was the only one that really indulged him.

"Well, they're all white…"

Everyone let out a groan from inside their gundamns then went back to battle. Trowa was heavily confused. He sat there in his gundam, staring at the intercom. "What…" He said softly, "It's true…have you guys ever seen a black rice crispy?"

"GET BACK TO THE BATTLE!"

"Wufei don't yell at him, that doesn't do anything. Heero, could you please?"

"Please what? Quatre? Cat?"

"Yeah…"

"Please what?"

"Talk to Trowa, bring him back to reality."

Now what made that little dude think that was something Heero could do?! The man sat back in his seat and glared at the intercom speaker. He so desperately wanted to explode and go on a famous Wufei rant…but what could he really say? Nothing, that's right, nothing. So he sighed, letting go of all those pesky feelings and emotions, then he spoke, "Trowa, let's be professional."

"I thought I was-Oh! You mean about the battle? Got it, right, I am all here…you can count on.."

"Trowa…"

"Yes sir!" He giggled a bit then continued, "What if I just called you Sir all the time, would that be weird? Would you like that?"

"What does it matter? Who cares what you call me."

"Clueless." Came Duo's joking tone.

"WHO'S CLUELESS!"

"Wufei, no one is talking to you."

"WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE DOING ANYTHING!"

"What are you talking about Fei?! Trowa just took out two dolls! Are you blind?!"

"…shut up." And like that, again Wufei cut communication. Duo had to roll his eyes.

"so?! SOO!" He was trying to get attention , no one was buying it…for the moment, but Duo had an ace in the sleeve. "SO! Are you guys like boyfriend girlfriend?!"

"DUO SHUT UP!"

"Wufei, calm down. What, who are you talking about?"

"Trowa and Heero…" Duo's laughter over the intercom sounded…evil.

"Who's the girlfriend?" Trowa asked calmly.

From inside his gundam…Heero's brow twitched. He was starting to lose his patients…and that was bad, because he had a tone to go on. "Duo…please…just stay focused…Wufei…calm down, you're gunna pass out. Quatre, stop paying attention to them, and Trowa…Trowa?"

"I'm just listening to you rally the troops. It's cute."

"Shut up Trowa."

"What?! It is! I love it when you take charge!"

"What does that even mean…"

"You see what I mean?" Came Duo's voice. "They're both fucking clueless."

"Yes," Quatre began, "but that's what makes them so perfect for each other."

"So you see it too?"

"Well of course! Look who you're talking to! I think I have every romance novel known to man!"

"Will the two of you stop the chit chat for now, before Wufei has an aneurism!" Heero barked, sounding a little more bothered than usual. For whatever reason, Trowa looked out toward Heero's gundam. He could see it through his screen. He furrowed his brow and spoke, "Heero did you eat?"

"Shut up Trowa."

"That would be a no…."

"He just cares about you Heero! And check under your seat I slipped a snack in for everyone."

Duo could be heard digging around, then his voice sang out over the intercom, "YAAAY! Thank you mommy Quatre!"

"Shut up Duo."

"See, we're not the only ones who do that!"

"Trowa, we do not do that. We do not have a thing; we do not have…little jokes or anything like that! We work together! That's it!"

"Someone's cranky…" As soon as Duo's voice left the air everyone looked out at Wufei's gundam. The maniac went on a spree and took out the remaining dolls, alone. Well they were never gunna hear the end of this…

Spoot: And so it is, the first chapter!

Heero: Oh god no, we gotta come back?

Duo: I love it here. Free food.