Once upon a time there was a jackass. He lived in a shithole apartment littered with empty beer bottles and bloodstains. His name was Wade Wilson and damn if there wasn't a more depressing way to live. He didn't try to make friends or bother to talk to anyone, until an idiot moved in across the hall.

An idiot with a nice ass and a smoking hot set of legs.

"Crap." Peter muttered under his breath bending over for the keys that had just tumbled onto the floor in front of his new apartment. He heard an appreciative whistle come from down the hall and he froze.

"That's a nice ass you've got there baby boy", said the stranger who shot him a ridiculously beautiful smile. Oh yes, Peter saw the scars, it would be hard to miss them, but that smile, it was doing things to him he hadn't felt since his break up with, Gwen 'I-always-said-she-wasn't-good-enough-for-you' Stacey, as his Aunt liked to say. He could actually picture his Aunt's mouth twisting to form that sentence, having heard it at least once a week for a couple of months.

"Well, I... uh... thanks?" Peter fumbled with his words, not sure if what the man said had been creepy or just some sort of odd ice-breaker.

'I seriously need to work on those social cues I somehow missed growing up.' Peter thought hopelessly and decided to smile at the man in an attempt to smooth over the awkward answer he had given.

The smiling stranger's eyebrows shot up, as if he was not expecting that response at all. His face smoothed out quickly and he gave Peter an appreciative once over before walking closer, opening his own door, and saying over his shoulder, "I'll see you around kid."

Peter stared at the door across the hall. Room 114. He wondered what kind of man lived there, he seemed nice enough, a bit crude though. Definitely not the sort of person Peter was used to.

Which is exactly why I moved here. He nodded his head and smiled again, Come on Peter, you've got this. Meeting new people isn't that bad, it's the whole reason you moved!

He unlocked his own door and walked inside his new home.

He sat himself on the couch, already feeling at home in his new apartment. He sent a quick text to his Aunt letting her know he was done settling in and asked her what time would be good to set up a dinner, so she could come and see his new home.

His Aunt May was the one who helped him decide to move away from Queens. She said the move would encourage him to go out and make new friends in the world. Peter knew he was a little awkward and shy when he met new people, but he needed to make some sort of effort to have some sort of social life here. He just didn't know how.

He worked from home as a programmer, while the pay was pretty good, it didn't make it any easier to meet new people.

He had left everyone from his old town behind after Gwen cheated on him with his ex-best friend Harry.

Mary-Jane and Harry had been his only friends, he and MJ dated for a bit until they both realized it would be better for them to be friends. Well, that wasn't quite right. MJ decided they would better off as friends and he just smiled and nodded his head. Like he always did. Their relationship was mostly just Peter agreeing with her about everything. He just didn't have the heart to tell her no.

Then Gwen had come along, and he was head over heels for the gorgeous blonde. It was wonderful, she got along with his ex-girlfriend and his best friend. She was sweet and kind to him, asked him his opinions on things, and always greeted him with a smile. His Aunt May came to him with concerns, that in his eyes, were unfounded. He had thought she was just being over-protective. So what if Gwen and Harry spent a lot of time together? It was his girlfriend and his best friend, he had nothing to be worried about.

They had a whole year of happiness before Harry and Gwen decided to hook up. It had crushed him, seeing his best friend and his girlfriend hold hands and tell him they were in love. He remembered thinking, "Aunt May was right", before running to MJ looking for a shoulder to cry on, but she and Gwen had become really close friends and somehow, she had been convinced that the cheating was all Peter's fault. She was incredibly angry when he told her she was wrong, but he guessed suddenly having a backbone would make for a surprised and angry MJ after all the years of smiling and nodding at her.

He was all alone at home and after a long talk with his Aunt May they came to the conclusion that Peter need to meet more people and make better friends, so here he was.

He popped up off the couch and got started on making himself some dinner when an idea popped into his head. He rushed to his bedroom and quickly wrote the note before his brain could tell him not to. He carefully cracked open his door and tiptoed across the hall to room 114. He slid the note under the door and ran like hell back into his apartment, slamming the door and completely ruining his efforts to be stealthy.

He leaned against the wooden door and took a shaky breath before straightening himself up and adding more ingredients to his pasta that was cooking away on the stove top.

About half an hour later Peter was setting the table, for two. He checked the time, 7:30. Running his hand through his hair he walked into his bedroom to check himself in the mirror when he heard a knock.

Rushing to the door he stood on his toes to look out the peephole.

He opened his door to a grinning man standing in his doorway.

"You wouldn't have anything to do with this note, would you baby boy?" The taller man said with a wink.

Not sure If I'll keep writing this, let me know if you think this could go anywhere. thanks for reading!

- Uh, I just realized Aunt May is a total mother-hen and protective badass and I am completely ashamed of myself for forgetting that. I hope this updated version is a little bit better.