The view was really better at the top.

The people down were going on about their business like ants. I couldn't see them too well though. All I need to do is just take one more step, and I'd be joining them. Free falling out of the sky isn't a bad way to go.

In short, I'm really, really, really high right now.

Seriously, just the slightest push of the wind could floor me right now...

"Are you trying to become some sort of sniper, Hikigaya-kun~?"

I look over behind me.

There standing with her hands behind her back, was Yukinoshita Haruno, smiling like that one purple cat from down the rabbit hole.

"Oh, I suppose I should call you 'little brother' now~!"

Oi, why are you so cheery when I'm contemplating suicide? At least pretend to feel sorry for me.

"Leave me alone."

"Oh, come on, don't be like that! You finally get to fulfil your dream of becoming a househusband, you know? I don't see why you have to be so glum, chum."

"What do you want?" Maybe that was rude, but I couldn't really care less about pissing her off right now. She might as well be the one to push me off from on top of this skyscraper right now. She'd actually be doing me a favour.

I didn't think it was possible, but Haruno's smile grew even wider and more mischievous.

"I never got the chance to welcome you to the family!"

I'm seriously going to jump off now.

000

(Rewind...)

Young love is a bomb just waiting to explode.

All those youthful hormones injected into the eyes tends to render one blind. To them, love is the ultimate form of divine happiness that can move mountains. They're setting themselves up for a disappointment. As soon as that natural charm wears off, and one or both of them stop finding the other attractive, only dramatic tragedy can follow. And then they'd realize what a waste of time it was to put so much time and effort to a relationship that can only end in inevitable failure.

That's how shallow young love really is.

Suppose it would serve a lesson for the young idiots in love to be more careful on whom to spend money on in the nearby future.

It's sick – disgusting. That's what "young love" is. A big fat joke for poor suckers. It's no different from a conman trying to swindle you out of your money investing in a plot of land that will never grow in value. At least then only your money will be taken, with "young love" your time will be wasted as well.

Suppose I want to yell that out to the simpletons around me, but I decided to let them learn from the experiences of their own folly.

"Oni-chan, will you stop daydreaming?" A voice booms at my rear as I felt a finger jabbing at the side of my head like a woodpecker.

I look down to find my annoying, yet adorable little sister pouting.

"You're getting that creepy look on your face again. Seriously, gross. You're starting to scare people."

I groan. I may have been a little sidetracked.

"I always look like this."

Komachi crosses her arms and huffs. She was dressed in her casual wear. A cutesy, frilly teal blouse with reddish brown shorts that no doubt attracted some male attention. She had this big ole hat and some sandals for the occasion.

"Don't tell me you're off monologing something seriously cynical again?" She shakes her head in mock disappointment. "I swear, I leave for less than five minutes, and I already find you complaining to yourself like some hermit."

"I can neither confirm nor deny that statement." I state coolly, avoiding eye contact.

As I stare back, Komachi had a faux look of frustration and ire that made me flinch a bit.

"It was obvious from the creepy look in your eye! Don't tell me you're jealous at all the young couples around the mall and now felt the need to stroke your own ego by monologing something disgusting about love?"

I gulp. "N-no!" Who would be jealous of those idiots?! Don't be stupid. It definitely has nothing to do with those idiots going all lovey-dovey at the fountain in the middle of the mall where everyone can clearly see them. In fact, I pity them.

Komachi sighs.

"Ah, I knew I should've just gone alone."

"Then why didn't you?"

My little sister glares at me as if the answer were obvious. "Then who else would carry all the grocery bags, silly Oni-chan?"

I could feel my eyebrow twitch. So I was just slave labour?

"Besides, a little of the outside might be good for you once in a while, Oni-chan! You're so cooped up in your room all summer playing those disgusting, unhealthy visual novels of yours I worry for your future. You might end up being one of those NEETs who marry their pillows."

Silly, Komachi. Worry not. Your Oni-chan will find a rich Ojou one day who will lavish him with gifts and attention that I wouldn't even have to lift a finger to work ever. You must simply have faith.

"Anyway, here!" She shoves a piece of paper on my chest. "Go be useful and find these for me."

I take a look at the list she gave me. Wait a minute – "This is the entire thing. What are you going to be doing while I'm slaving around here?"

Komachi gives me a foxy smile that strangely reminded me of a certain kouhai.

"What do you think? I'm going to go look around the mall, silly! I heard they had 50% off on new swimsuits at Venus Swimwear."

I take a quick look at the list again. There were too many items for me to find by myself quickly. This would take all afternoon by myself. Why would Mom make us do all this stuff? Yeesh.

When I look back up again, Komachi had already managed to make her escape before I could protest. She was already far away riding the escalator waving at me goodbye with a huge grin on her face that said "thanks, sucker".

I sigh.

I guess I'm just as much of a sucker as young couples in love.

000

Let me see…

Some eggs, flour, salt and sugar, a couple of juice boxes…and what else? Oh, what's this? A toilet plunger? What's wrong with our old one? Did Dad clog the toilet again?

Ah, how am I supposed to carry these all the way home? Without the shopping cart, these were going to be way too heavy for me to lift alone. It's not like I've been lifting weights. Have you even seen how scrawny my arms are?

…

…

…

Oi, oi, why does it feel like I'm being observed? It's making me rather uncomfortable.

"Are you seriously going to carry all that, Senpai?"

I turn to my left to meet a foxy kohai looking at my arms with scrutinizing eyes. The frown on her face told me she wasn't at all impressed at my lack of muscles.

"Isshiki, what are you doing here?" My eyes are up here by the way.

She looks up at me with a dull expression. "Doing the groceries, what else would I be doing here in the grocery store, silly Senpai?"

Really? You don't exactly look like you dressed up just to go to the groceries. With a bright pink polo shirt and skinny jeans with white tennis shoes, she definitely turned some heads. Even with something so plain she managed to make it look cute and attractive. It looked more like she was going out on a date than doing the groceries.

"…okay." I agree with her and just continue to look for the stuff on list.

"Are you seriously just going to ignore me, Senpai?" Isshiki's voice lashes out like a banshee. "Seriously, how rude."

"What are you talking about?"

"Your cute kohai came all this way just to talk to you and you pretend she's not even here?" What? You mean like all the way across the aisle? Must have been tiring. "At least greet me or something."

I sigh. Oh, all right. I'll play along. "Hello, Isshiki. It's a surprise to see you here." I say in the most apathetic, disinterested voice.

"Hello, hello, Senpai, fancy meeting you here!" Isshiki beams with that 1000 kilowatt smile. "Are you seriously going to carry all of that? There's way too many and your arms are pretty scrawny."

You can blame Komachi for that. We were supposed to do this together, but the little brat ran off on me.

"I'll make do." I wave her off. There's still quite a lot I have to look for. I don't want to drag this chore anymore longer than I have to.

"Weeelll, since you sound so confident and totally macho…why don't you help me carry my stuff?"

All the way to your house? "I'll pass. My hands are full already."

"Come on, Senpai, it's just until I get a cab. It's not like I'm carrying much." She motions to the basket in her hand carrying sodas and junk food. Stereotypically, I thought women were supposed to watch their figure.

"You went all the way to the mall just to buy snacks?"

"Movie night." Isshiki says casually.

"Right." I look away.

"So you'll do it?"

I sigh. There's just no winning with this girl.

"Fine. But only until you get a cab. I have my own baggage to carry."

"Awesome~! You're the best, Senpai!"

Don't get so cheery, girl, just because I got suckered into carrying you bags for you. "I still have some stuff to pick up. You're going to have to wait until I get them all. Why not help me look for them?"

Isshiki gasps and takes a step back.

"Are you asking me out on a date?! Sorry, Senpai, going grocery shopping with you may seem like the perfect excuse to get closer but I don't like guys who use such shady tactics, sorry." She bows down in the typical fashion like always.

I stare at her impassively.

Are we seriously still doing this gag? This is so overused.

Isshiki then emerges with that playful smile she always displayed. "I will help you look for them though, but it's not a date. So don't get the wrong idea, Senpai."

Yare yare.

000

"So, what else are you looking for?"

We've been wandering around from aisle to aisle picking up the groceries. With Isshiki deciding to take one item to another when it caught her interest didn't sit well with me. With her adding more and more stuff, the baggage would get more and more heavier.

"Last item on the list: a toilet plunger." Damn it, Dad. You just had to be embarrassing.

"Ew, Senpai, did you clog the toilet or something?" Isshiki is taken back.

"No." I snap. "It was just on the list."

"If you say so…" Oi, don't give me that look.

I groan.

As if people didn't already think I was disgusting enough.

"Is it too heavy, Senpai?"

I wheeze. I ended up sounding like a squeaky toy with a broken squeaker.

"…yes." Please at least take your share and go already. Pretty please?

"Well, be a man and suck it up."

I groan.

My kouhai can't be this cruel…

000

As I feel my arms breaking off from my shoulders, I have never felt so much dismay for gravity. Why couldn't the Earth be like the Moon? That way, I could be bouncing like I'm jumping from trampoline to trampoline without overexerting myself with these bags.

"Ohhhhhh, what's this?" Isshiki suddenly beams up. "Senpai! Senpai, come over here!"

"Hey, wait—uh!" I feel a tight grip the back of my shirt dragging me farther away from the exit. Noooooooo.

Wait, Isshiki, I still have to look for Komachi, you know? Hey, wait, don't drag me! These bags are gonna drop!

"Senpai, take a look! They're selling these dresses 50% off! I have got to check them out!"

"Wait, Isshiki, what about all this baggage I'm carrying around?" I bark. "I can't carry these with me much longer."

Isshiki pouts.

"Boo! You really need to start lifting weights, Senpai. No girl wants to get together with a wimp."

Barring the fact that working out would go against my "to work is to lose" motto, with the rate this is going, it might as well be considered a workout in itself to carry these all the way across the mall.

"Oh, well. I guess it can't be helped." Isshiki places a finger to her cheek. "Just deposit them somewhere."

"Oi, didn't you say you had a movie night?"

Isshiki waves me off.

"Oh, I'm sure the girls wouldn't mind if I'm a little late. We're having a sleepover anyway. I can't pass this up. Besides, it's good to have a new look for a new year, don'tcha think?"

I feel my lips curling downwards.

This is going to take all night.

000

[Yosh, Onii-chan, you're on a date with a girl?! :D]

I scoff and then text back.

'No, I'm not. Just head on home when you're done with whatever it is that you're doing. I got to help out with a friend I met.'

I press send.

After a while, my phone rings with another text message from Komachi.

[Liar! Since when did you have any friends?! You're definitely out with a girl! Don't think I can't see you standing inside of Moonlight Mile with an orage haired girl in tow that I'm sure I've seen before! Komachi is so happy for you! My useless Onii-chan is on a date! I never thought I'd see the day… TT_TT]

What?! She can see me?

My eyes dart off towards the exit of this women's clothing store. I scan for an ahoge resembling my own, but I'm met with a bunch of strangers walking around minding their own business.

'It's not what you think!' I quickly send back. It's a good thing Isshiki is distracted with going through a colourful selection of blouses otherwise she might have noticed me going frantic over my phone.

[Whatever you say, Onii-chan! I'll be on my way home then. Make sure to tell Komachi all about you date, kay? ;) hehehe, Komachi can't wait to get an Onee-san!]

I sigh.

I guess that's the end of that.

Before I could close my phone, another message comes by.

[Make sure not to screw it up! Or else Komachi will be very, very angry! Make sure to compliment her on whatever she wears, okay, useless Onii-chan?!]

Okay, geez.

[Remember, don't SCREW it up!]

"Oi, Senpai," Isshiki's voice calls to me. "…what do you think of these?"

My kouhai holds a white spaghetti strap dress with frilly designs and embroidery of flowers in the lower parts of the skirt. The dress was also low-cut, so it would've offered a good view of her chest.

"It's a bit risqué." I tell her honestly.

"Then I guess that means you like it eh, Senpai?" With a wink Isshiki places the dress back into the fold along with the others and takes a look at the other ones.

Now that I take a look around, Moonlight Mile was a clothing shop that catered specifically to women. They sold everything from dresses with flashy designs to hot pants to...erm, unmentionables.

There were also a few older women shopping here, I feel them staring at me. It makes me feel bit self conscious standing in here with Isshiki. I hope I'm not breaking some unspoken rule about a guy being in here.

Heh, when you look at it from a romantic-comedy perspective, I kind of look like a boyfriend helping his girlfriend with shopping.

From the experiences I have when either my mother or Komachi went cloth shopping and dragged me along, women often take a long while to pick, rummaging through rows and rows of clothing before just buying one.

I open up my phone to check the time.

It was almost night time.

Hopefully this doesn't take any longer. I was planning on playing a new JRPG I just bought recently all night tonight.

With nothing better to do, I just stood with my back turned towards Isshiki while staring at ground to avoid suspicion. For some reason, I could still feel myself under observation. Was this how bacteria felt like when under a microscope?

Disregarding the fact that I just compared myself to micro-organisms, this feeling of being watched made me feel pressured.

I decide to take a quick glance upwards to see if anyone was really staring at me.

You know that thing in those detective shows where time slows down when something shocking passes by? Those times normally happen when the detective is face to face with the killer and finally realises that the person he suspected the least was the killer all along.

It just happened.

I saw purple.

"Hikigaya-kun, is that you?"

!

"Wow~!" Yukinoshita Haruno placed a pair of jeans she was just holding back before sashaying towards me. "I had a feeling you were someone familiar, but I couldn't quite tell with your face down covered with that hat." She pointed towards the baseball cap I was wearing indoors.

"I didn't expect to see you in a place like this. What are you doing here? This is girl's store, you know? You're not supposed to be here. Are you with someone?" The last one sounded like a subtle threat.

Haruno-san wagged a finger in front of me.

"Hey, you better not be cheating on my precious imouto~!"

E-eh...what is this? Why is she standing so close?!

"Oi, Senpai, what about this-" Isshiki's voice takes a long pause behind me. "...oh, Haru-san-senpai. What brings you here?"

"Oh, not much, I just heard they were having a sale in Moonlight Mile and I just had to check it out."

"Oh, so...what's the occasion?"

"Oh, are you referring to this," Haruno-san pinches and pulls the thread of her fancy black kimono with flowery designs. "...not much. It's just a formal family dinner with my dad's associates later this evening. I just decided to take a little detour to kill time."

I turn to look at Isshiki, and I see her admiring the expensive fabric and design of Haruno-san's kimono. I can already see a few women turning their heads to look at Haruno-san as if she was some sort of celebrity.

In all honesty, she pretty much looked like the ideal Yamato Nadeshiko.

"So, are you here with Hikigaya-kun?"

Isshiki nodded.

"But it's not what you think. It's not like we're on a date or anything! He's just here to help me carry my stuff, nothing else!"

"My, my," Haruno-san's smile was mischievous. Her indigo eyes glanced at me for a quick second before turning back to Isshiki. I swear I could've seen a twinkle in her eyes. "...that's good to hear. You better not think of him as anything more than a friend, Iroha-chan~ He already belongs to Yukino-chan~"

"Ehehehehe..." Isshiki rubs the back of her hair bashfully.

This situation felt more like two subordinates unexpectedly meeting their boss outside work than a meeting between acquaintances. Haruno-san's superior social standing made it clear that she was in control.

The two then began to talk about certain outfits they liked and what they thought boys would like while I stayed out of the conversation in the corner.

"Hmmmm," Haruno-san was seemed to be pondering about something. What made it ominous was that she was looking at me the entire time. "...oh, Iroha-chan, are you still using Hikigaya-kun tonight?"

"Well, not really." Isshiki shook her head. It was clear that Haruno-san made her quite nervous and just if she told her to throw herself off a cliff, she just might.

"Mind if I borrow him just for tonight?"

Wait, why are you two talking about me like I'm some sort of kitchen appliance?

"Sure, go on ahead~!" Like that, Isshiki just gave me away like she was lending a pair of crayons.

"Don't I get a say in this?" I intervene.

"Nope." With a wink, Haruno-san latches onto my arm like a viper. The side of her breasts pressing against my upper elbow making me shiver at the softness. I wonder if the urban legend about girls going commando when wearing a kimono was true.

"Bye, Iroha-chan~!" I could already feel Haruno dragging me towards the exit. "Thanks again for letting me borrow Hikigaya-kun."

"No problem, Haru-san-senpai!" I heard Isshiki yell at the background.

"Wait, what about our stuff that we deposited near the department store?" Maybe I can use that as an excuse to escape.

"Don't worry about that. I deposited mine separately so we should be okay."

I turn to the older woman latching at my arm with quite a grip. Her eyes sparkled with emotion. Her smile was invasive yet inviting.

Who am I kidding? Escape from Yukinoshita Haruno was impossible.

000

Haruno-san began to drag me all across the mall. We ended up turning heads with the kimono-clad girl beside me making a scene. Whether or not Haruno-san even noticed, she didn't show it. She probably just didn't care.

"So, Hikigaya-kun, be honest with me, do you like Iroha-chan?"

I tried to look away, but there was something about Haruno-san's eyes that drew me to them that made me pay attention. The fact that we were so close our noses were almost touching didn't really make me feel comfortable.

"I don't dislike her." It was a neutral response, but apparently Haruno-san didn't like that.

"Oh?" Her facial expression became more scrutinizing. "That's not a very interesting answer."

I shrug.

I was well aware that Haruno-san was a very manipulative person. And from Hayama's description of her, I was all too aware that I should be on my guard when dealing with such a person.

In other words, the best tactic was to make sure I did not pique Yukinoshita Haruno's interest in any way.

She played with something until it broke. Like a child playing with a magnifying glass and aiming it under an ant while under the scorching sun.

I just didn't get what she wanted with me. Was it because I'm club mates with her younger sister?

"You know something, Hikigaya-kun?" Haruno-san starts. Her head lies to rest on my shoulder. I could smell lilacs from her shampoo. "Yukino-chan's birthday just came up a week ago."

That struck me. I didn't know when Yukinoshita's birthday was. I wonder if Yuigahama...

"When was it?"

"January third," Haruno says like she just talked about the date of someone's funeral. "It was her coming of age, you know? She just turned eighteen."

A soft sigh escapes her lips. It felt as though Haruno-san was talking about office paperwork rather than her sister's birthday.

"I...didn't know that."

"Well now you do!" Haruno-san's smile returns. "You should get her something to make up for missing such an important event of her life."

I remain silent. Not really knowing what to say.

It was then that Haruno-san dropped a bomb on me.

"Father's going to engage her to Hayato-kun."

...

...

...

...what?

Haruno-san starts laughing like she was watching a really good comedy show.

"You should see...the look on your face...hehe..." The elder Yukinoshita said in between laughs. "What's the matter, Hikigaya-kun? Are you jealous?"

"...no."

"Mphm," Haruno-san pouts. "It's not good to lie to Onee-san, you know?"

I automatically scoff unintentionally.

"If this keeps up, Yukino-chan will never be able to give you that genuine thing that you want so badly."

"How did you know that?" That came out harsher than I meant it to.

"Women have their ways." Haruno-san says with a shrug.

What the hell? Can this being known as Yukinoshita Haruno read minds? I have got to be more careful about what I say in front of people. Because it apparently seems that Yukinoshita Haruno will always catch wind of it.

Does she have some sort of information network like in one of those spy movies?

Scary...

The being known as Yukinoshita Haruno was truly terrifying.

"Oh, I almost forgot. It's almost time." Haruno-san stops in her tracks when she glances up the clock hanging inside one of the stores.

"Time for what?"

"Father has a meeting with his business associates. It's a dinner between corporate executives." Haruno-san informs me and then starts dragging me along to a certain direction. "I'm supposed to be there with him as his eldest daughter."

"Okay...so why are you dragging me along?"

Haruno-san giggles.

"Silly Hikigaya-kun. You're my date for the night, duh."

What.

000

If I had any doubts about how rich the Yukinoshita family were, they were certainly gone now.

Haruno-san had taken me to Kitcho, one of the most expensive restaurants in not just Chiba, but Japan. And from the interior looks alone, it looked like a night here would cost more than what both my parents make in a year.

It made me feel self conscious going in her with nothing but my plain T-shirt and jeans with everyone dressed in expensive brand clothing, western suits, or tradition kimonos.

I felt out of place.

It didn't help that I caught people staring at me, or more specifically, Haruno-san and me. They were most probably wondering what a guy like me had someone like Yukinoshita Haruno latching on to his arm dressed the way I was.

There was no way my Stealth Hikki would work in a scenario like this. It was like trying to infiltrate a heavily armed base with cameras in every corner.

As I was just walking side-by-side with Haruno-san, I couldn't help but wonder if she had somehow anticipated this. Meeting her at Moonlight Mile the way we did was just too much of a coincidence.

After all, why would she bother checking out a 50% off sale if she was this loaded?

Haruno-san dragged me along to an isolated part of Kitcho – a private part seemingly used for only the elite of the elite. As each step I took, I felt like I was dragging myself more and more to my death.

Haruno-san took her steps with grace and poise suited to that of nobility.

Meanwhile, I was walking with my back hunched like Quasimodo.

Taking me towards one of the doors, Haruno-san slipped open carefully and stepped inside dragging me with her.

"Father, Mother, pardon my tardiness." Haruno-san said politely with a slight bow of her head.

I could, however, feel all eyes on me. I recognized some of the people in here as politicians – diet members of Chiba including Yukinoshita's father. They were all dressed in either expensive suits or traditional kimonos.

I was as stiff as a stone as Haruno introduced me.

"This is Hikigaya Hachiman," she motioned to me without letting go of my hand. "...he is my escort for tonight. I hope you do not mind his company."

Near the end of the room, a certain blonde haired raijuu sitting beside two adults who I think are his parents.

My eyes continue to roam around subtly until I spotted a very familiar pair of wide ocean-blue eyes.

Yukinoshita Yukino stared back at me with bewilderment as if I was the last person on Earth she'd expected to be in this room.

On mortified horror, I turn to look at Haruno-san beside me.

What did you just sentence me to?

A/N:

This story was heavily inspired by Even Hikigaya Hachiman Can Write A Love Letter by God Emperor Penguin.

Okay, first of all, I'd like to state out that I'm not too confident with writing an Oregairu fic. Why? It's just too complex and sophisticated. Writing from Hachiman's perspective was often tricky for me as he constantly made references and witty comparisons I just lacked the skill to imitate. His character is just so damn complex.

Before any of you accuse me of going OOC, I'd like to take a quote from Frog-kun's bio: Being "in-character" is not everything. I just wanted to create something we can all enjoy.

Now while I understand Hachiman's logic and reasoning (at least I think I do), I just found it so hard to relate to him. I was more like Zaimokuza in high school than a Hikigaya Hachiman, so I guess that would explain it. I'm not quite as pessimistic in real life.

If I have to admit the things I'm not too proud of when writing this, it would be more the fact that I had Kyon's character in mind when I wrote this than Hachiman's. Also, I'm not too fond with how Iroha and Haruno interacted as I felt it was too rushed. I also felt that the fact that Iroha dragged Hachiman along served almost no purpose than to get him found by Haruno, as a kimono-clad high class young woman would have no business in the grocery store. The last thing I'm not proud of is how the prologue ends. It doesn't give any hints as to what exactly the story is about.

Not to say that I don't have a plot. I do have one in mind. But I wanted to end the prologue here so I don't risk going all info dump on you readers. I didn't want to risk making the story feel like a pain to read by going too much on exposition. My skill isn't as good as say...80k Hikigaya, Weewah, or God Emperor Penguin's who are the more popular story writers in the Oregairu section.

That's not going to stop me from making a story though.

This was a fanfic I wanted to write for such a long time. I actually wrote this fic last year November but couldn't find the proper plot until much later. I actually wanted to post this on January 3rd since that was Yukino's B-day.

PS: Did I seriously just critique my own story?

I'd appreciate any critiques and review below. It would really inspire me to write more if you gave me your thoughts as to whether or not you liked it. I'll try respond your reviews and would appreciate feedback. I'll make improvements based on what you guys say. Even if your review is to just drop by and say you liked my story, it would be greatly appreciated. I'm a pretty chill dude, so feel free to say what you did and didn't like about this chapter.