It's been a while. Don't worry, I'm not dead. :)

"Ugh." Lux grumbled as she headed to the summoning platform. "Why do I have to play Akali's matches for her… and this early too."

"Stop complaining." Katarina grinned. "You'll do fine."

"That's easy for you to say." Lux glared at the assassin. "Also, WHY DID YOU COME INTO MY BED LAST NIGHT?!"

Katarina pouted. "I can't sleep without Akali. That's why I was in the garden last night."

Lux sighed, facepalming. "Seriously? Is she like your teddy bear or something?"

"Yes." Katarina patted Lux on the back, pushing her towards the summoning platform as they rounded the last corner. "Now go get em, Akali!"

"Um…" Lux stared across the lane at her opponent. Her opponent stared back.

"Well at least this makes it even." Akali chuckled.

Lux looked down at the two kama in her hands. "So… how do you use these?"

"Just stab stuff with the pointy end, idiot. How else do you use a blade?" Akali looked her baton up and down. "The real question is, how do you use this?"

"Uhhh…" Lux tilted her head, thinking. "I'm not sure how to explain it. You kind of have to-"

"Minions have spawned." The announcer's voice boomed from the sky.

"Okay, Akali." Her summoner's voice sounded inside her head. "Let's do it. Lux is weak against mobile assassins, so this shouldn't be too hard."

"Um… okay." Lux transmitted to her summoner before walking up to the minion wave. She looked at the kama again before stabbing it hesitantly into a melee minion. The minion faded into the ground. "Hey, that wasn't too hard."

She looked over at Akali, who was waving her baton around, but to no avail. Nothing was coming out. Oh lord. Lux cringed, watching Akali making a fool of herself. "Akali, what are you-"

"I don't know!" She pointed the baton at a minion. "Lux attack, fire!"

"Um… what is she doing?" Lux's summoner sounded confused.

"Uh, I'm not sure. Don't worry about it." Lux waved him off so he wouldn't think too much into it. She stabbed another minion, collecting the gold, then glanced at Akali again.

She was furiously banging the baton on a minion's head, but didn't appear to be doing any real damage to it.

"Akali, that's not-"

"Quiet! I'm damaging it."

Lux stared at the minion's health bar. "Akali, I think that's just the damage from your minio-"

"Shut up. I've got it under control."

"Clearly not." Lux moved over to Akali's ranged creeps to hit them.

Akali glanced up, stopping her assault on the minion. "How do I-woah!"

A bright flash of light engulfed her for a second, and she teleported right on top of Lux, sending them both toppling to the ground.

"Akali, kill her! She flashed onto you, what a dumbass!"

"UM, I'M TRYING!" Lux had dropped her kamas out of surprise and had resorted to flailing her arms at Akali. A tangle of limbs, they rolled around on the ground scratching at each other.

"What is going on here?" They paused their catfight to look up at the new voice, Akali on top of Lux. Speaking of cats, a very confused Nidalee was staring at them.

"Oh, uh… hi Nidalee." Lux chuckled nervously. "Kill Aka-Lux for me, will you?"

"Hey, what?" Akali complained, glaring at Lux. "That's not fair!"

Nidalee raised an eyebrow. "There has always been a jungler. What are you talking about?"

"Akali, is something wrong? What is going on over there? Did you forget how to fight?" Her summoner sounded concerned.

"Uh, no. I'm just… I, uh…"

"DEMACIA!" A flag landed right in front of Nidalee.

"Oh fu-" Nidalee was unable to finish as Jarvan came hurdling in, slamming her to the side with his spear.

"LUX, I'LL SAVE… you…?" Jarvan stopped, mirroring Nidalee's expression. "What are you two doing?"

"Um…" Lux looked back at him. "Not sure."

"Wha-" Flames suddenly engulfed him, and he dropped to the ground, rolling around and yelling. "WHAT THE FUCK!"

"What?! Why did you just ignite him? He was full health!" Lux asked her summoner, bewildered.

"Whoops. Misclick."

"Akali…" Jarvan sounded enraged, raising his spear. "How dare you ignite me! Meet your doom! DEMA-"

"Hey, not so fast!" Nidalee snarled, and pounced at Jarvan in cougar form. The two junglers rolled away, cat noises and yells of "Demacia!" reaching their ears.

"Um…" Akali stood up, letting Lux up. "This match is a complete mess."

"No kidding." Lux chuckled.

"Hey, what's going on?" Her summoner once again chimed in. "Something is wrong, isn't it?"

"Um, no!" Lux frantically picked up her kama and began slicing at minions. "I-I'm fine!"

"So, Lux." Akali once again returned to whacking minions with her baton. "Would you care to teach me how to use this?"

Lux deadpanned. "Clearly not that way."

Akali glared at her. "Then how? I don't need this shit from you right now."

"Uh…" Lux thought for a second. "I really don't know how to explain it. It just happens for me."

"I swear I'll strip and start masturbating right now if you don't tell me how to do it."

Lux blinked in shock. "...WHAT?! OUT OF ALL THREATS YOU COULD MAKE, YOU CHOOSE THAT?!"

Akali smirked. "Well there's nothing else I can threaten you with. Plus, I'm sure many people would enjoy that."

Lux sighed. "Okay, let me see… Try imagining channeling your power to the wand. Then imagine releasing that power."

"Uh…" Akali squeezed her eyes shut, pointing her baton at a minion. Suddenly, a blinding flash of light enveloped Lux's vision, along with a searing pain throughout her entire body.

When it cleared, she saw Akali, staring at her incredulously. "Uh…"

"Wait, she's level 4! HER SUMMONER IS HACKING! HOW DOES SHE HAVE ULT AT LEVEL 4?!" Lux's summoner yelled, infuriated.

"Ow." Lux fell to the ground, the energy drained from her body.

"Woah." Akali leaned over her. "Are you okay?"

Lux chuckled lightly. "So that's what it feels like to get hit by my laser."

"Indeed." Akali smirked. "That's payback for the countless times you've cooked me."

"Ah… ye-" Lux's vision suddenly blurred, and she felt as if she was teleporting through space. Before she knew it, she found herself standing on the end game platform, along with the other nine champions in the game.

An announcer's voice boomed out from the speakers. "A summoner is currently being investigated for cheating, due to having their ultimate ability before level 6. This match has been cancelled. Enjoy the rest of your day."

All ten champions stood there, confused. As the shock wore off, they began separating, leaving the summoning platform one by one, until only Akali and Lux were left.

"What just happened?" Akali asked flatly, looking over at Lux. She wished she had an answer to that question.