THINGS LEFT BEHIND
AN:I have not watched the new season of NCIS. And I have not watched much of Bull either. Unfortunately, it seems I am working almost every Tuesday night.
"You act as if I am supposed to be happy about this." Tony said to his small audience who included Team Gibbs, Abby, Ducky and Jimmy.
They were all gathered in Abby's lab, and they were talking, excitedly, about Tony's daughter.
"The only reason I even know about Tali is because Ziva is dead. She was going to let me live my life without me knowing I had a child somewhere." Tony stated. "Please explain to me how any of this is supposed to make me happy."
"She is a beautiful little girl, Tony." Abby said.
"She looks so much like Ziva." Jimmy said sadly.
"She has your eyes, Anthony." Ducky replied.
Gibbs didn't say anything. But, he could not help staring. He could clearly see both Ziva's and Tony's features in the little girl's face.
"Well?" Tony asked, looking at Gibbs. "Your turn."
"She looks so, so much like Ziva." Gibbs stated, shaking his head.
"Abby, I want a DNA test." Tony stated.
They all just looked at Tony, confused. They had no question that this child belonged to Tony. Why did Tony have questions?
"Tony?" Abby just looked at Tony, surprised at the request.
"Orli said Tali was mine because Ziva told her that Tali was. That's not proof. That doesn't mean anything." Tony said.
"But…." Abby started. She didn't understand him denying what everybody else saw. Plus, she kinda liked the idea of a little bit of Ziva still around. Abby liked the picture of Tony and Ziva. Tony's attitude was spoiling it for her.
"But nothing, Abby." Tony shot back. "If she's mine, I need to know. If I have a daughter, I need to know, for sure."
"Ziva said she was yours." Abby replied, as if that should be enough.
"There are things about Ziva's and my relationship that no one knows, Abby." Tony said. "Things you wouldn't believe if I told you. Things I really don't want to talk about right now."
They all looked at him, confused.
Gibbs was the first to speak. "Something happened in Israel." It was a statement and question, all rolled into one.
Tony looked at Gibbs but didn't speak.
"What was it?" Gibbs asked, he knew it was big. He could tell by the look on Tony's face. "DiNozzo, what was it? What happened?"
Tony shook his head. "You won't believe me. And it really doesn't matter right now. I'm a dad…if, I'm a dad, I have to more important things to worry about."
"They are important, Tony," Jimmy started. "if they are going to affect how you treat this little girl."
Tony was shocked that anybody would even think that of him. "I…I don't even know what to say to that."
"You are so angry at Ziva." Jimmy explained.
"This baby has nothing to do with that, Jimmy. It's not her fault who her parents are or what went on before she were born." Tony said.
"Then what…how did this come about?" Ducky asked, as carefully as possible.
"We got drunk. I thought that she was on the pill." Tony stated.
"DiNozzo!" Gibbs glared. He had not forgotten what Tony had said earlier.
"You won't believe me. It's over, in the past. It doesn't matter." Tony stressed again.
"Well, if it's over and in the past, just tell me." Gibbs stated.
Tony sighed and gave in. He knew that Gibbs would not let this go. "Ziva knocked me to the ground and held a loaded gun on me."
Gibbs was speechless, as was the rest of the room. He just looked at Tony.
"See, you don't believe me. I knew that would be the case no matter when I told you. I just…I can't deal with this right now." Tony replied.
NCIS NCIS NCIS NCIS NCIS
The next few days were tense, until Tony found the answer he was looking for. It was determined that he was the father to one Tali David DiNozzo. He was not sure what to think. He was not prepared to be a father. Usually one has at least nine months to get used to the idea. And then they got a baby, not a toddler.
Tony needed help. He realized that pretty quickly. There were women at the office who, when they found out Tony was a dad, offered their help. They gave him advice. They told him what a girl Tali's age would need. They even gave him clothing. Some of them offered clothing and toys that their little ones had outgrown, others bought new items. Tony got a new two-bedroom apartment; one that had recently came open in his building. He had packing to do. He could not stay, with his daughter, in his place. They had outgrown it. The agent had had to pull a chair into his bedroom to sleep in since Tali had taken over his bed the first night she had stayed at his apartment.
Tony was seriously rethinking his career, too. He loved being a field agent. But, he was Tali's only parent, Ziva was dead. He had to think of his daughter. He had to be around for her. He had to watch her grow up. He wanted to watch her grow up. He wanted to see her do all the things kids do. He wanted to witness all the milestones.
NCIS NCIS NCIS NCIS NCIS
Gibbs had seen Tony mature in a matter of days. But the team leader had still been disappointed when Tony had not automatically turned to him for help with Tali. Yeah, Senior was back in Tony's life. Senior had not been a model father, but he had come back. And he did seem to be a changed man. He seemed very eager to help Tony raise his granddaughter. But, Gibbs was not convinced. Senior couldn't just come back after all this time and just act like nothing happened. And, to be honest, Gibbs had been very surprised that Tony had let his dad back in so easily. The team leader knew that that Junior and Senior had been talking, a lot, lately. Gibbs even knew that after Senior had moved into Tony's building that they had had dinner at each other's apartments on numerous occasions. But, he still somewhere in his mind just assumed that Tony still held him in the same regard. He didn't understand what had happened to change that.
Tony didn't look at Gibbs the same way anymore. True, Tony had matured, and, as such, his need for a father figure had diminished. And it was true, DiNozzo, Sr. was now back in his life, and Senior seemed to be interested in what was going on with him. Senior seemed to be interested in helping the agent raise his daughter. So, things were better from that standpoint. Gibbs could never replace Tony's dad. The team lead had not really tried to. He had just tried to be an older, wiser friend to the SFA. He had listened to the young man and had advised him where he could. But now, Gibbs felt like he was being left out. And he didn't like it.
Tony had no idea how it happened how the change had come about. But Gibbs no longer treated him as a trusted friend. Gibbs no longer took him aside to talk over cases as they used to. It seemed, at least in Tony's mind, that Gibbs in some way blamed him for Ziva leaving. Gibbs blamed him for not having his 'daughter' in his life. It had been Ziva's idea, all her idea. And it had to have been around the time she found out she was pregnant. She had left to get away from Tony, not as she told everyone, that she had missed home. And she was needed in the wake of her father's death. Maybe that was true, given her father's position. But it still left him with still, more questions. Had she thought that Tony might try and take the baby away from her? Did she think that Tony would reject her?
The only thing Tony had left was questions. He didn't understand how Ziva could justify him not knowing that he had a daughter. And he didn't understand Gibbs' shift in attitude. But, he could deal with neither of those at the moment; he had a little girl who needed him.
NCIS NCIS NCIS NCIS NCIS
"That's what you don't get, Tim." Tony replied. "How would you feel if this happened to you? If a year had gone by and an old girlfriend of yours had been raising your kid all on her own." Tony looked around the room, measuring the looks on Gibbs', Ducky's, and Jimmy's faces. "How would you feel not knowing? Jimmy, how would you feel if you had missed out on that time with Victoria? How would you feel if you'd missed out on the first year and a half of her life? How about you, Gibbs? And don't tell me it wouldn't have mattered because it, sure as hell, would have!"
Tony then turned his attention to Abby. "You expect me to just forgive and forget, Abby. But, you don't treat people that way. You don't withhold the fact that they are a dad for two years. It's selfish. And she had no right. Tali is my child also, half mine to be precise, and that half deserved to know her father exists somewhere outside a picture frame!" Then he realized something.
They all recognized the look. They had seen it often enough, especially when Tony was on the trail of a good lead.
"What?" Abby asked.
"Tali recognized me. She had seen a picture of me and Ziva sitting on a Vespa in Paris." Tony stopped a moment. "Wait a minute. I didn't take that picture!" He paused again, thinking out loud. "Ziva didn't have a camera or a phone with her. She had left it in the motel room. Who was taking picture of us in Paris?" Tony looked at them all again. "Who did Ziva know who was tailing us in Paris? I didn't know we were being followed. I didn't know the picture was being taken. And why take it and sent it to Ziva?"
"The David family has contacts all over the world." Gibbs started.
"This is the only picture that Tali had with her. If there were more…." Tony reasoned.
"Maybe the rest got burned up in the fire." Abby offered.
"We both took pictures. This is only one that survived. And, we didn't even take it. Why? It wasn't even a picture she took. What's going on?" Tony asked.
"Maybe it was sent to her, framed." Jimmy suggested.
"Why?" Tony asked. "Why take a picture of Ziva and I and send her one and not send me one? And, why didn't she tell me about it?"
"There was something Ziva didn't want you to know." Ducky stated shaking his head. "But Ziva…."
"None of it makes sense." Tony stated pacing and running his fingers through his hair.
"Maybe she was the one who was threatened." Ellie added. "Maybe that was the real reason she left, then she found out that she was pregnant."
All but Tony nodded in agreement.
"It just…it feels like there's more to it." Tony said.
"Could Kort have been in France when you were?" Ducky asked.
"Kort could have been anywhere. He was way, way too good at hiding in plain sight." Tony commented.
"What did he have on Ziva?" Jimmy asked.
"Unfortunately, Jimmy, I will never know the answer to that question." Tony paced. "Or any other question. Both Ziva and Kort are dead. Of course, Kort was never much of a talker, anyway." He said, sarcastically.
"DiNozzo." Gibbs started.
"Don't DiNozzo me, Gibbs. I just became a dad. How am I supposed to deal with this when Tali starts to ask questions? How am I supposed to tell her…who her mother was? How she lived her life? How she met her end? What do I tell her? How do I tell her in a way that WON'T leave her traumatized?" He suddenly felt very defeated. "How do I tell her things I don't even know the answers to?"
THE END
END NOTES: Here's an extra special 'Thank You' for AlexDN, and your story "The Future You Didn't Expect," in particular the Vespa thing. I remember the pic of Tony and Ziva on the Vespa. But, I never thought a lot about it. I just figured that they asked someone else to take a pic of them. As tourists often do. But then I read AlexDN's fic, which raised the possibility of something a little 'hinky' going on with the picture. I liked the idea and used it.