It's Lorelai Gilmore Appreciation Week on Tumblr and this is my little contribution. It's an entry for day 2 "favorite relationships". The story features all of my favorite relationships, plus the most important relationship Lorelai has with coffee because in a former life Lorelai Gilmore was coffee. Coffee is ALWAYS there for Lorelai in any situation, in all the big moments in her life.
This story is one of these "5 times and 1 time"-stories and I hope you'll enjoy it. It's revival-based, featuring big moments before, during and after the revival. I concentrate on feelings and thoughts, so there is no dialogue in this at all, which is very unusual for my style of writing and especially for the Gilmore Girls, which is a dialogue driven-show, so I hope this is somehow enjoyable and I should definitely wrap my thoughts up and just wish you "happy reading". Please let me know if you liked it. (:
One more thing, this story is dedicated to my tumblr-bestie, T, who is my biggest cheerleader and Gilmore-soulmate.
5 Times Lorelai's Only Support System Was Coffee And 1 Time She Didn't Need It
1.
It was one of these days, which didn't start right. Lorelai heard her alarm, but she couldn't quite move yet. She was not ready to face the day and what it might bring. Instead, she turned around once more, burying her face into Luke's pillow, which had long been abandoned since he got up at five.
The inevitable happened and Lorelai fell back to sleep because the bed was too comfortable. With no Luke in the house, no Paul-Anka begging her to be taken outside, no back-up alarm clock, and no construction site nearby, Lorelai easily drifted off to sleep. When she awoke an hour later, she got up like a thunderstorm, being mad at herself for falling asleep and dreading the mocking and the speech Luke had perfected over the years of living together. It was not the first time something like this had happened. Therefore, Lorelai had mastered a routine, which she followed along when she overslept. Certain steps of her morning routine could be easily left out.
When she finally entered the inn, she was starving and foremost craving coffee. The initial shock of sleeping in, which had released some extra energy had gone and she needed her fix of coffee. She didn't make coffee at home because making and drinking coffee got cut off her morning routine when she overslept; Lorelai's first way at the Dragonfly was, after dropping off her purse and coat in her office, to the kitchen from where the breakfast smell was already mixing with the smell of the lunch dishes. The noises of the room got louder as she opened the door to the kitchen, a smile spreading across her face as soon as she met Sookie's gaze. It was their way of greeting each other.
However, Lorelai didn't notice that Sookie's smile wasn't as genuine as it usually was; it was almost wary, and over too soon. Lorelai was set on getting herself a cup of coffee; little things like Sookie's smile being slightly different didn't catch her attention. The only thing on her mind was coffee and a cup to fill the desired liquid into, which would help her forget the stressful start of the day.
Lorelai didn't know that the stressful part of her day was still ahead of her, after swallowing the first gulp of the dark liquid, which brought her to life, she turned to Sookie and she saw a weird look on her friend's face. Soon after some stammering, some gibberish and some random story about Martha and Davey, Sookie finally said what she wanted to say and Lorelai felt caught off guard because she had never heard Sookie complaining. It was news to Lorelai that Sookie wanted to leave. Sookie said she felt like she had a burn-out. She still loved cooking and being a chef. She enjoyed being in a kitchen day in and day out, week in and week out, month in and month out, but she didn't feel inspired anymore. It felt like one boring routine, which she still cared about, but lately it didn't feel enough anymore. She wanted some time to find her cooking self again, to find some new recipes to make the menu better again.
It was no order Sookie placed with her, but it was more than a wish, which Lorelai should grant her. Lorelai was not in the position to decide whether Sookie could do that, it was Lorelai's part to make the decision possible. They needed a substitute chef and they would need to discuss how long Sookie could be gone without the inn suffering from not having the famous Sookie St. James here anymore. Lorelai not once told Sookie not to go, even though she didn't want her best friend to be gone out in the world, just like her other best friend, Rory. They agreed on six months and six months would fly by Lorelai assumed. Time always flew by in retrospect. It seemed long when you looked ahead, but it was never long when looking back.
Lorelai listened to Sookie's plan. Sookie had already done some research. She had found a farm where she could stay and experiment, learn how to grow plants. Jackson loved the idea since he was a farmer too and he could improve on his skills as well. They had looked up a school for the kids, they had taken care of everything. And Lorelai was surprised because for once in Sookie's life Sookie had a plan. A plan that could be easily remade, but she had thought about this before approaching her.
That's when Lorelai understood that Sookie was serious. Sookie didn't want to discuss it with her before she hadn't made up her mind about everything. Sookie actually wanted to be able to come up with answers to all the questions Lorelai asked and Lorelai asked a lot of questions. Sookie could answer most of them, and Lorelai agreed upon thinking about it properly, thinking how this could work best for the inn.
However, Lorelai couldn't hide the hurt she was feeling, letting her best friend go felt weird. Sookie sensed it and embraced Lorelai tightly, telling her that nothing would change, nothing would ever change between them. Lorelai nodded, trying to believe that this was true. Nothing would change, but Sookie wouldn't be here anymore in the morning to greet her, make her day brighter, telling her the newest gossip or mocking their men at home, discussing what weird stuff they were up to now.
Lorelai exhaled deeply and took the cup of coffee she had placed aside again and left for her work at the inn. She let herself fall into her chair behind her desk and took a moment to comprehend what just had happened. Her first reflex was to drink her coffee, which helped her process. It also helped her understand her friend, who just needed a break from the inn they had been working for about a decade now.
It was time for something new for Sookie, something to refresh her head. Lorelai understood where Sookie was coming from, but still she was not pleased with it. She would miss Sookie, she would miss her being here, coming to work to a friend was what Lorelai especially loved about the Dragonfly. She loved when she could try Sookie's latest creation and she loved that there was always a fresh pot of coffee in the kitchen, where a good chat was always in store too. Lorelai would have to do without all of that, for Sookie's sake. She swallowed the last sip of coffee and noticed that the morning indeed turned out worse than it had started.
2.
Again they were in the hospital because her father had a heart-attack. It was the third time that something like this had happened. She should have been prepared, she should have known how to act in a situation like this. She should not feel as overwhelmed as she did right now. She should have learned from the previous encounters, but she didn't.
Her mother was a wrack all over again, thank god she wasn't in a jogging suit again, she wore her usual Chanel costume, at least something in the world was right.
Everything else seemed out of place, ever since she had gotten the phone call while doing some paperwork in the Dragonfly and her phone had turned back to being a calculator. She had not known what to do in the first place, too many thoughts had been running through her head, but then suddenly her feet had been moving, and she had been taking her handbag and had left without even telling Michel. She had put the keys in the ignition lock in her car and had driven to the hospital her mother had told her Richard had been brought to.
Lorelai had not bothered calling Rory, she had had to know her father was fine first. There had been no need in worrying Rory when she had been away in London; Lorelai had not had a clue what time it had been in London at that moment anyhow. And yet she had not had answers to all the questions Rory would for sure ask. She had needed the answers herself first. Halfway through the drive to the hospital in Hartford, she had called Luke to let him know where she was. He had been concerned and had offered to come too, but Lorelai had reminded him off a needy dog at home. Luke had protested, but Lorelai had cut the discussion off as she had arrived at the hospital.
Her mother had been found easily, her voice had dragged and had echoed through the hallways; it all had felt too familiar, yet it was not a nice familiar, not something you stopped and took a moment to take it all in and sigh because it felt like home, this felt like hell, all over again, the third time in hell within 15 years.
They had seen Richard raging at the nurses, screaming words of anger with the last energy he had found in himself. The situation had been serious, they had brought him to an OR. Lorelai and Emily had been pulled aside, no words of goodbyes could be spoken. No words, but the words of an angry Richard Gilmore had echoed through the hallways.
Lorelai and Emily had watched him being pushed away and it didn't feel like a goodbye; it had felt like this could solve the problem, this could help him, this could make things go back to normal.
However, they didn't get the chance to go back to their normal life. When the doctor came back to inform them on Richard's condition, their life was turned upside down.
Both of the Gilmore Girls had brought their hands in front of their mouths. It was shock and disbelief, which made them do that. The words the doctor spoke were hard to comprehend, not that it was complicated. The doctor was especially good at explaining what had happened and what had caused Richard's death, but comprehending what death meant and that Richard Gilmore was indeed dead was a lot harder.
Lorelai felt the tears filling up in her eyes, she swallowed every other second to keep them from shedding down her cheeks. She managed to keep the tears in because right now she couldn't afford to be weak. The doctor was still there talking about what needed to be done and what the procedure in cases like this was. Lorelai was set to catch every word the doctor spoke.
After the doctor had gone, Emily and Lorelai remained silent because there was nothing to discuss. They needed time to progress it, even though proper processing would not take place right now this minute. Lorelai felt the tears in her eyes, which she no longer could hold back. She cried. She cried because her father had died. She cried because he had died too soon. He had died and was no longer here. She brought her arms around herself, hugging herself somehow A shiver ran down her spine. She no longer had a father, and her mother was a widow.
Suddenly, Lorelai remembered that Emily was still standing beside her. Emily just had lost her husband, her partner, her love her life. Lorelai could only assume what she must be going through. If something happened to Luke, Lorelai would die right there and then. She noticed that Emily shivered, struggled to stand tall, but there were no tears, not yet. Lorelai reached out for her mother's shoulder, but Emily escaped Lorelai's touched by turning to face her. Emily's voice broke as she said that there were plenty of things to do. Lorelai knew that things had to be done now. Loads of papers needed to be signed, the funeral needed to arranged and all these people had to be informed, but she thought they had time for some grieving, a moment of weakness before they would occupy themselves with all the necessary tasks which needed to be done.
Lorelai was wrong after all. Emily didn't say anymore, but left to speak to some nurses and the procedure what had to be followed. Lorelai watched her go, and decided she would catch up with her just in a moment, she couldn't shovel her feelings away like her mother. She needed a moment to be weak, so she could be strong in the following days. Strong enough for example to tell people, to tell Rory that her beloved grandfather had died. She felt sick even thinking about it.
Lorelai didn't know what to do, so she got coffee. The coffee in the hospital usually sucked, but she felt sick anyway, it wouldn't make a difference. Nothing today would make a difference.
Quite easily Lorelai found a coffee machine and she inserted some coins. It helped her calming down, the smell of the cheap coffee filled her nose and she relaxed. As soon as the first drop of coffee met her tongue and she tasted the bitter coffee she felt like she could handle this situation.
She finished the cup of coffee quickly, and it gave her the energy to make it through the day, to make it through the following awful days. It was a power boost and she adjusted to a similar get-things-done-mode like her mother. Whenever she felt like crying again, she had another cup of coffee. The coffee made her stop feeling sad, the coffee stopped her from feeling anything that would make dealing with the funeral impossible. The coffee made her survive the phone calls she had to make. The coffee helped her through losing her father.
3.
The fight was bad. There was yelling and accusations. The big issues in their relationship were discussed. And all of it in front of some strangers, in a place she called her home.
Luke yelled at her, storming to the door, smashing it behind him as he left to check on the muffins at the Dragonfly. Lorelai knew it would do no good if she followed him when he clearly needed some time to cool off alone. She didn't know how long he had known that she was still seeing the therapist or how long he had thought that her lying about therapy was something she had come up to cover for having an affair. It hurt her to know that Luke thought she was betraying him, seeing someone else when it was always supposed to be him. Therapy made her realize that. And still she couldn't admit to him that therapy was something she enjoyed, something that actually helped her, something she actually needed because she was a broken person.
He wouldn't understand, at least that was what she thought. Luke never thought much about therapy, at least that was what he ranted about all the time. Luke was not a person who believed in the help of a therapist. It was easier to not tell him about it and keep up the act of being annoyed with her mother's behavior. That way she didn't need to explain and justify herself. The therapy sessions stayed where they belonged, to herself, no one needed to know about them.
Lorelai exhaled and looked at the unfinished business in the dinner. Her life seemed just as much as a mess as this. She took another moment to gather herself and faced the people outside the diner. She took their plates, which they had taken outside, and excused the scene Luke and she had caused. Her smile wasn't as reassuring as Lorelai thought because the people looked at her concerned. She made sure to wish them a nice evening and closed the door behind her. She turned the sign to 'closed' as well and shut all of the diner's blinds. No one needed to see her pain as she cleaned up the diner. The few customers who had witnessed the argument would feed the gossip mill anyway.
Deep in thought she was rehashing the fight Luke and she had just had. The day was a mess anyhow, first Emily Gilmore was introducing her new boyfriend and then Rory decided to write a book about their relationship and to top it all off she fought with Luke, one of the heated debates they ever had.
Luke was supposed to be her safe harbor, her partner in life, who always had her back, but he had lied to her, kept her out of his life. She wanted to be involved with his family. It was never her intention to keep her crazy family, as Luke put it, to herself and he shouldn't keep his crazy family to himself. She enjoyed having April over, she was like a daughter to her because Luke was like her husband, it was not official, but it felt like that. She was there to see April grow up and she liked listening to any April news. She even enjoyed to hearing about Liz and TJ's latest crazy adventure.
Luke was involved with her family too. He had admitted that Rory always felt a little like his own, and he was there to take care of things when the funeral for her father needed to be organized. He even willingly hugged Emily Gilmore, even though she was not his favorite person in the world. They didn't keep things entirely separate, which was not possible. Yes, they dealt with problems on their own, but this was not the way she imagined her partnership with the only man she ever really loved.
However, Lorelai didn't know whether this was fixable, she doubted her relationship with Luke. Maybe they were not meant to be after all, when after nine years they were still not able to communicate with each other. It seemed like there weren't on the same page when it came to their relationship. Lorelai was not even sure if they were even in the same book anymore.
Lorelai gathered the empty dishes together, and after finishing those she took the filter cone for the coffee maker and decided to make her the cup of coffee she had come here in the first place. She had needed a good cup of coffee after a day like this and some reassuring words of her partner in life, but all she got so far was another dreadful moment this day that made her question her life even more. If she couldn't count on Luke, who could she count on anymore?
All that she could hear was the coffee machine making sounds as the hot water dripped through the filter to the pot. She took the bottles of ketchup and mustard from the tables, collected all the saltshakers and started to clean the tables like Luke had instructed to do her whenever she had helped him close up in the last nine years. Helping him close up, was always in her own interest, it meant he was free earlier, which meant they could catch an earlier movie show.
Now, Lorelai didn't even know if she would ever go to the movies with him. She didn't even know if he would come home tonight. She didn't know how to fix this. Her trust was broken, and so was his. How should they rebuild the trust? They had to, she couldn't imagine a life without him, she could not. She was too attached to him. He was the one, with all his flaws, with all their flaws, but she couldn't be longer in this kind of relationship, in which they weren't as committed to each other as she thought they were.
She stopped wiping the tables to wipe away the tears dripping down her cheeks. Finally, after this long day, she let herself feel the pain, all the emotion she had stored up in herself. No one was there to comfort her or to tell her everything would turn out fine.
Then, the coffee machine made a sound. The coffee was ready to be consumed. She took one of her favorite cups form under the counter and poured her some of the coffee, which she had longed for all afternoon. It tasted like Luke's coffee because she was at Luke's, and it was the same coffee Luke used when he made the coffee. It was the same machine Luke used when he made coffee, but it didn't taste the same. It didn't give her the same feeling, but she drank it nevertheless.
Her life seemed like a mess. The biggest mess ever, she felt lost. No one was there for her. Everybody left her, or betrayed her in some way. Only the coffee was there. She sipped some more and finished closing up the diner. Luke was right after all, she only drank a cup of coffee and the rest was unused. It was a waste of coffee, Luke was right with that. But Lorelai couldn't care less about it, her relationship was on unsound footing and that's what she cared about at the moment. She finished off the last sip of coffee and hoped that there was a chance of mending her relationship with Luke because she would not be able to give up his coffee.
4.
Her head was else where, but certainly not at the business of the Dragonfly. She wasn't speaking to her mother, she wasn't speaking to her daughter, and she was not speaking properly to Luke either. There was not much time to talk anyhow because Lorelai had been preparing for her big Wild-trip to California. She was set on hiking the Pacific Crest Trail and a lot of her free time was used to prepare that trip. Hopefully, she would find herself on the trail and get some fresh thoughts, which would make her head clear again. She desperately needed a new perspective, things at the moment seemed muddled and messy and nothing would take her anywhere. She was stuck and at the same time she felt lost.
Now, she was found though. By Michel, who entered her office, with two cups of coffee and a stack of papers in his hands. He had knocked at the door, but Lorelai hadn't heard it, Michel opened the door anyway. He had one of his fake smiles across his face as he seated himself across from Lorelai and placed both the cups and the papers down on the table. Lorelai pushed her other papers away, which she had intended to work on, but couldn't concentrate on. She knew whatever Michel wanted to talk about; it would need her undivided attention, no distractions wanted.
She took a sip of the coffee, hoping that the taste of it would make this conversation easier. Michel definitely knew how to make her feel comfortable. His attempt was good, but coffee wouldn't make the trick this time. Michel would leave the Dragonfly, his mind was set and by the format of the papers Lorelai could tell Michel wanted to discuss his replacement.
The papers were applications documents, including cover letters, CVs, and references. Michel was certainly good at hiring someone, he always did his best research, and put anybody through his paces. He asked for far too many references, but nothing than the best was tolerated and had to meet Michel's high standards
Lorelai herself was picky too. She liked how smoothly things were running at the inn. Michel and she were a great team, they had worked so long together, they knew each other's perks and strengths, they knew they could rely on each other and Lorelai despised the thought of adjusting to a new person, which she didn't know and had to get to know all over again.
Michel didn't do this lighthearted either, it was a tough decision, a tough call he had to make. He had asked her over and over again if there was a possibility to expand, to make this bigger, to make life exciting again. He didn't want to leave, but Lorelai's limited possibilities didn't leave him no choice. He had to think of himself, he had to think about the kid he would have with his husband.
Nevertheless, even though neither Lorelai nor Michel really wanted to talk about a replacement, they had to suffer through this talk. Lorelai nodded to what Michel had to say, but overall she didn't pay much attention, she trusted Michel with everything he did. He was very much capable of choosing a decent replacement even though both, he and Lorelai knew no one could ever truly replace a Michel Gerard with his sarcasm and his skills.
Lorelai hated to discuss things like hiring someone new, she didn't enjoy looking for new chefs either. This was Sookie's kitchen and no one else's and the front desk belonged to Michel. They had designed it for him to work there, imaging seeing some stranger standing behind that desk was not right and not the way Lorelai had ever pictured her beloved Dragonfly Inn.
Her two partners, who had built up this incredible place, were gone and all she had was lousy cup of coffee and no cookies or cake Sookie would have baked for an inconvenient conversation like this. Instead, Sookie was on some farm, doing god knew what and Lorelai wasn't even sure Michel had informed Sookie about this leaving. Lorelai guessed not, but ever since Michel had announced he would be leaving Lorelai hadn't talked properly to him. It was hard looking him in the eyes, it was even hard being in the same room as him. Michel was usually the one who felt offended hurt, but Lorelai could act like this just as well as he. She felt hurt and betrayed by his decision, even though she could understand where he was coming from, but letting him go was hard, way harder than she expected. Of course, Michel annoyed her at some points, but she needed her angry friend in her life, it would not be the same without him and from personal experience Lorelai knew that keeping in touch once Michel had left town would be hard. Life went on and the contact would just die down eventually to the obligatory Christmas cards.
Lorelai was not good at hiding her hurt; Michel commented on it, saying this was just as hard for him as it was for her. But Lorelai couldn't believe him, and shot him back some snappy comment, which offended Michel too easily. Soon they were shouting at each other, accusing the other of things they deep knew weren't true. Their verbal argument ended with Michel smashing the application papers on the table, telling Lorelai to just pick any candidate and he would be there with the interviews she should schedule. He didn't want to have to do with anymore of this ridiculous replacement. He just wanted to get it over with.
Lorelai watched him smash the door behind him and was left with a stack of papers she was forced to look through. All these young people, who were eager to get a opportunity like this. As she read through the applications she sipped at the coffee Michel had brought her and she imagined who of these young applicants could ever replace a Michel Gerard. Who of these applicants would ever bring her coffee without thinking twice, knowing how much milk she liked in her coffee and which cup was her favorite.
Michel knew all of that and even though they weren't on the best basis right now, he still brought her the coffee she liked so much. She skimmed through the papers, but she eventually had the guts to read the properly because she knew she had to. The inn was her workplace and her business, she had to think like a businesswoman and staff needed to be replaced. The inn could do without a chef, but not without a concierge. Sometimes business was hard, tough decisions had to be called even when you didn't feel like it.
The coffee helped soothing Lorelai's nerves and she was finally able to decide on a few candidates, which she gave a call later. Maybe Michel would be on board with any of these young applicants. Maybe. You could always hope, Lorelai thought, as she finished the cup of coffee Michel had brought her.
5.
Lorelai had not spoken to her daughter in weeks. Their dispute was still sitting between them, still unresolved. Most of Lorelai's life was in a good place again: She had found a solution to most of it. She still had to figure out a way to make Michel stay, but other than that her life was good. She had mended things with her own mother and things with Luke were especially good.
That's why she wanted to reach out to Rory. She needed Rory at her wedding; she wanted Rory there. They should be able to put their disagreement aside for one day. And unlike to her first engagement to Luke, Lorelai knew she couldn't withhold big news like this. She could not keep her engagement a secret again and therefore she would not repeat the mistakes of the past. Lorelai telling Rory this big news was sort of a peace offering, an invitation to start peace negotiations. Talking was a first step, well, having contact was a first step. Reaching out to the other was the very first step.
Luke had encouraged her to do so. He reminded her how awful their first engagement turned out because Lorelai had refused to contact Rory and refused to tell her about the news. Not telling Rory was not the right way to punish her for her bad behavior, especially when Rory was 32 years old and she should not get any punishing anymore. It did not get them anywhere when she was 21 and it would certainly not be effective at the age of a grown woman.
However, Lorelai didn't feel like talking to Rory. Their last conversation had been horrible, so Lorelai decided to sit down and send an email instead. She sat in front her laptop in the kitchen table. A new email was opened and sitting there empty, waiting to be filled with words. Lorelai had no clue how to start the email. Should she start with a casual 'hi kid', or a more formal 'dear Rory' or with a neutral 'hello Rory' or just start off with just writing her name. There were so many options to choose from.
While she tried figuring out which form of address would be best to choose from, half of her thoughts brought her back to the day of their argument, and suddenly another wave of sadness overcame her, she felt just like the Sadness sticker form Upside-down on her computer. Lorelai indeed felt like crying would help slow down the world and obsess over life's problems. She had done that when she listened to Violet performing that new song of Stars Hollow the Musical. Now it was time to do something and no longer linger in her sadness.
Despite her and Rory's disagreement, she missed her daughter. She truly missed her. She missed talking to her. It was one thing when Rory was gone traveling and hunting for a story and was, therefore, out of reach, but it was an entirely different thing when they weren't talking to each other because they were fighting. It was worse like this. Way worse. And like during Lorelai's first engagement, she could not fully embrace the happiness without sharing the news with Rory.
Lorelai wrote the main content of the email she intended to write. It could be summed up in four words: 'I will marry Luke'. Or should she write 'Luke and I are engaged'? Both meant the same, but since she had set a wedding date already the first option seemed the more reasonable one.
All that was left for Lorelai to do was to rewrite and rephrase it. It needed some interlarding as well. She had to make it sound better. But how was she supposed to do that? She tried adding some more, but it didn't quite sound right, it didn't meet her expectations. This email was supposed to be the first contact her daughter and she would have after a long time. This email was supposed to end an awful fight, which they had had at a graveyard, right in front of Richard's grave.
Lorelai regretted reacting that way to Rory's news. She regretted acting like Emily, that was what Rory had accused her off, and partly she was right. This was not how Rory and she worked. But finding the right words for this email was hard. Lorelai stared at the few words she had written, which weren't enough to end the radio silence. Lorelai got frustrated with the situation, and herself. Why was this so hard? She moaned and groaned, and eventually shut the laptop, which was sitting on the kitchen table. She looked to her right, where Rory's room was. Some of her boxes were still there, sitting in her childhood room. This was where Rory Gilmore had grown up, the very same, who now betrayed her mother by intending to write a book about their lives.
Lorelai got up to close the door, looking at the room did not help her writing the email. On the contrary, it made her angrier and reminded her off her child for whom she gave up so much and for whom she did everything she could to offer her a better life and everything Rory had dreamed of. Lorelai had always understood, for so long she was the queen of understanding, but after 32 years it was Lorelai's turn to be a little selfish, and to not give her grown-up daughter everything she asked for, at least not without a discussion.
However, therefore, it was necessary that they actually talked again and since Rory had not initiated any contact so far, Lorelai took it upon herself because she was the mother and she was the one who had big news to share.
As Lorelai thought about how she could phrase the email to end the silence, she reached out of instinct for the pot of the coffee machine sitting on the countertop. The first verbalizations came to her mind as she filled the pot with water, and filling it afterwards into the coffee machine. She decided which of her Wild-anecdotes should be included into her email to lighten to mood, when the familiar scent of coffee powder reached her nose.
When Lorelai turned on the machine, the ideal introductory sentence came to her mind, so she opened the laptop again, she deleted the few words in the mail and started typing. The sound of the coffee in the making cheered her on, made her fingers fly over the keyboard with ease. She hit the right letters and the right words formed themselves. Overall, Lorelai achieved the right tone for an email like this.
The first big paragraph was finished when the coffee was ready and Lorelai quickly got up to get a cup. She didn't want to interrupt the flow and absentmindedly took sip after sip from the cup; the coffee was warming her from the inside, emphasizing the warm feeling she experienced while writing this email, which turned out fine.
This email would be a turning point, this email would make things good again. This email had to meet high expectations, but with every word Lorelai wrote she got surer that this email could actually meet all these expectations. The caffeine-driven written email turned out better than she thought and after all Lorelai was not surprised that drinking coffee helped her writing to her also coffee-addicted daughter.
6.
Even though it was November, they were lucky to have nice weather, nicer weather than they would usually have in Connecticut at this time of the year. The outdoor wedding was doing fine so far and the bright sunshine helped to keep the guests warm. The leaves looked golden in the sun and made the day even prettier. The ceremony was long over and even most of the reception was done already as well. The cake was supposed to be cut soon and therefore coffee and tea were served.
Lorelai smiled as Dewey filled her cup with coffee while Brandon held a silver tray with cups placed on it. To save money Lorelai and Luke had asked some of Stars Hollow's citizens to help with waitressing. The town was eager to help, they had even held an emergency town meeting to discuss plans for the wedding, which they had been waiting for almost a decade now. Lorelai was happy to see the enthusiasm because organizing a big wedding within a month was a lot of work and she needed anyone's support she could get.
The wedding turned out lovely, even better than Lorelai had imagined and even better than she had discussed it with Kirk in her kitchen. Of course, there had been some incidents, but nothing major and nothing which wouldn't make a good story sometime in the future.
After receiving her cup of coffee, Lorelai said her thanks to the Dewey and Brandon, who were looking neat in their suits. She watched them offering coffee to Emily sitting next to her. Lorelai had warned the boys about Emily and arched an eyebrow to signal them to be extra nice to her. Dewey and Brandon were on their best behavior and Lorelai smiled when she noticed her mother was pleasantly surprised. She even turned to Lorelai to comment on the boys' manners and Lorelai's smile grew wider to see a happy Emily. Young gentlemen like Dewey and Brandon always impressed Emily.
The smile across Lorelai's face was never replaced on this day. The cup of coffee in her hands warmed her fingers. She looked over the square and took in the surroundings. It was the first more or less quiet moment she had to herself, one big moment had chased another and the guests demanded to be spoken to as well. Her smile didn't even fade when she saw Rory in a deep conversation with Lane, whose face was in a deep frown.
Lorelai pushed those thoughts and the words she had heard in the morning aside, but her fingers tapped against the cup of coffee. The ring chinked against the china cup, making a soft noise. Lorelai sensed her mother watching her and disapproving of her behavior of strumming her fingers against the cup. To Emily the clicking sound was probably nothing more than one of Lorelai's annoying traits.
Suddenly, she felt a hand on her shoulder and by the way it smoothed over her arm, Lorelai instantly knew it was not her mother who asked her to refrain from tapping her fingers against the cup. It was Luke, who took his seat next to her again. She turned her head and her smile grew a little brighter again if that was even possible.
Luke had returned from a conversation with his sisters and Lorelai was relieved she got him back in one piece. Liz's habit was to chew of Luke's ear off and in the process she took all of his patience and made him all grumpy. But from the look on his face, Lorelai knew Liz had some crazy ideas again. She wanted to ask him about it, but Sookie interrupted her by telling them it was finally time to cut the cake.
Lorelai joked which cake Sookie was referring to, but Sookie hushed the bride and the groom onto their feet; any comment and laughs fell on deaf ears because Sookie was on a mission. Lorelai placed her cup of coffee aside; she had not gotten around to have a sip yet, but when Sookie demanded it was time to cut the cake, Lorelai had no other option than to follow Sookie's lead. Sookie was the cake queen after all.
Sookie started to give Lorelai and Luke instructions on how to cut the cake, which Sookie announced to be their wedding cake. Luke and Lorelai listened patiently and nodding throughout Sookie's detailed instructions. They stole glances at each other and smiled at how head over heels Sookie could get when it came to cakes.
Finally, Kirk asked the wedding party to gather around for the official first cut of the wedding cake and as Luke reached for the knife, Lorelai shrieked and stopped him. This moment had to be documented, not only the moment of cutting the cake, but especially the cakes before they were destroyed by a knife. Kirk, who also acted as their official wedding photographer, took a photo of Lorelai and Luke in front of the richly decorated tables, on which the cakes were displayed.
Lorelai then insisted upon having another photo with only Luke's side of the family. April stepped right between Lorelai and Luke, who both put their arms instinctively around her. To Lorelai's right side Liz gathered with Doula and TJ and Jess stood next to Luke on his left side.
When it was turn for a Gilmore family photo, Lorelai felt again the pain washing over her, which she had successfully pushed down all day long. Richard couldn't be here and was missing this big moment for his very own daughter. He was supposed to be in this very important family picture. Emily stood next to Lorelai, placing an arm softly around her, something Emily was not able to do when Richard had passed away and they had learned about Richard's death. Rory stood next to Luke, hugging him just as close as she had hugged him right after the secret ceremony last night.
It felt odd to Lorelai that her family was smaller than Luke's, even though Luke was not a people person and was adamant to have as little human contact as possible. It didn't feel right that Lorelai's part of the family only consisted of two other people while Luke's was a bigger crowd of wildly assembled people.
It felt unbalanced and Lorelai asked Sookie to come stand with them for the photo. It was a natural step to ask Sookie, since she was not only her best friend, but also the person who came closest to a sister. They rearranged again, Emily standing next to Rory, so Sookie could stand next to her best friend. The five smiled at Kirk who took a photo.
As Kirk scrolled through the photos to check and everyone else was getting impatient for the cake, Lorelai saw Michel talking to Frederic. And since Lorelai had known Michel for such a long time now, she could read him like an open book. Michel attempted to hide his hurt feelings of not being included, but he was never good at hiding his true feelings. Michel had been to her secret ceremony, her elopement just hours ago and now he wouldn't be included to another group picture. It wasn't right and he was right to be offended by that. So, Lorelai called back the others and invited Michel to join the family photo because Michel was family to her. Her angry friend, who everybody needed in their life.
Again the most important people in Lorelai's life posed for a photo and Lorelai couldn't help but appreciate every single one of them. Every one of them fulfilled a different role in her life and she wouldn't trade anyone of them. They have been with her through it all and she was happy to have them in her life.
Kirk took the photos and then joked if there was anyone else missing to join this photo. Lorelai shook her head. She was pleasant with the collection of people she had in her life.
However, Lorelai forgot one of the most important relationships in her life, she neglected one of the best friends she had in life. A friend who had been there for her when the people she had carefully chosen to be in her life had been letting her down. The coffee in the cup on her table was getting cold and forgotten, but the coffee was content to be left out. It was the first time in almost two years that Lorelai didn't need the comfort of a good cup of coffee.
THE END
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