Hey readers! Back with another story, once again diving back into the LGBTQ side of things. Which I really love writing about and I especially like bringing this kind of stuff into a fandoms like this lol But I also wanted to write something to try to get a little bit of motivation when I write next time. So yeah... Without further ado. Enjoy :33
Update: I'm making some adjustments to the story. Maybe I might redo all of it (or just some of the chapters) of it. I'll let you guys know sooner or later.
He was comfortable with who he was for the moment. Or at least with who he identified as. To his father and brother, he was just a tomboy with a feminine name. To his teachers and friends, they knew him as "Logan". He was just another queer student like very few in his school, and most everyone would try to be supportive of it. His teachers would once in a while make the mistake of using the wrong pronouns and other students would only talk to him about what was in his pants and why he'd even want a dick. Logan knew that some of those kids were just confused, and he also knew that some of them were just a bunch of jackasses trying to get into his business. But whenever they did ask about "the surgery", somewhere inside, Logan could feel his internal organs drop.
Yes. It's something he thought about. Yes. When he's ready for it, he'd get it. The only issue: Acceptance. Although while his friends had accepted him for this decision, the answer from his family was something he feared the most. Logan had a somewhat of a small family. All he had was a dad,Elias, who'd be in and out of the house very often since he's always called in to fight the dangers outside of their country. Then there was his brother, David, who had been following his father's footsteps since the death of their mother. It was very obvious Logan was the black sheep in the family of three, yet somehow they still managed to let him into their heart despite the big difference. But would he still be in their hearts even if he told them about who he wanted to be? Would he still be loved by the only people he called his family?
Or would he completely be kicked out from their comfort?
Would he be treated like an animal?
The thought of being disowned brought weak tears to Logan's eyes, and if he doesn't tell them? Well, in his honesty, he suppose it'd be better than being kicked out of the house. But it only meant he'd resume his daily routine like it was. Not only would he have to keep wrapping those itchy bandages around his chest, but he'd have to suppress the truth, which would only create an extra weight to carry on his shoulders.
Logan inhaled, not really getting enough air into his lungs. It felt as if he were in a different world as he was deep in thought, and when his brain was left with nothing to think about, he was left to look around as the warm evening air blew against his arms and face. Where he was sitting right now wasn't too deep in the woods, but the spot he was in has always been reserved for him, David, and their dad. They'd always come here since they were little, and they'd tell each other ghost stories until they grew weary. The shadows of the trees loomed over him, the faint sound of leaves dancing on the ground. Followed by that, a small buzzing came from his pocket.
Logan reached in and pulled out his cellphone, and the first message he saw was from Elias which read-
"Can you come back now? I need to talk to you."
"Dad!" Logan called out, "Are you there?"
"Up here...!" The reply came from upstairs from the master bedroom.
The blonde walked up the steps, a small hint of anxiety rising in his stomach. He'd somehow managed to keep it together until he saw his father in his room, a book in his hand and when he saw the teen standing at the door, he removed his reading glasses and shut the book, "Everything okay?"
"Mm, yeah," Logan replied, "So what's up?"
Elias stood up, patting his hand down on the bed to make Logan sit down. He obeyed, watching as his father went into the closet and came back with a roll of ace bandages. "David said he saw this fall out of your backpack when you passed by each other today," Elias began, "You wanna tell me why you were carrying it around?"
Logan bit his lip, remaining silent as his eyes wandered to the floor, murmuring so quietly that even he couldn't make out what he was saying, "I was just... Holding onto them."
"For what? Are you hurt?"
"No. Not at all."
Elias stayed silent for a moment, and then he pressed on, "Okay, so you're holding onto them for what?"
"Our school nurse said she needed some of them?" As the words left his mouth, both knew that was a complete bullshit lie.
"Okay, how about we try that again without lying."
Logan sighed, beginning to think he should mouth off to avoid the conversation, "Why do you care?"
"I'm not mad, sweetheart. I'm only asking a simple question, and I don't see any reason why you should be giving me attitude right now."
The blonde couldn't think of any reason either, so he dropped the act, clasping his hands together like he was about to say a prayer before letting out another heavy exhale. Logan closed his eyes to block the tears as a mix of feelings raged internally. Not only did he think he'd be coming out of the closet today, but he was scared of what happened when he did. Part of him told him to keep lying, though another part of him told him to come clean with the simple truth. But it really wasn't that simple, and Logan made it clear as he began in a firm tone of voice, trying to hold back from revealing any emotion, "Dad... I don't know how big of a deal this is to you, but for me it's pretty hard to admit why I have them."
Elias had an unreadable look in his eyes, but he nodded, "Okay. What is it you're not telling me then?"
Logan opened his eyes, unintentionally letting a tear fall from his right eye, swallowing before admitting, "I use them to bind my chest so it can look flat. I don't know if you've noticed, or maybe you have but didn't want to say anything..."
His words drifted off, slightly taken back by that same unreadable look on his father's face. But Logan knew that Elias was starting to understand what he was getting at. However, he was still silent, and Logan spoke again, this time standing up so he could look him in the eye as he told him this, "And long story short..." His eyes were now dripping with fearful tears that he couldn't hide anymore, "I'm trans..."
There. I said it. Logan tried reading his father's face, searching for some sort of emotion. But he got nothing. It felt like forever until Elias finally gave a response, starting with a slow nod, as if he were still trying to process what came out of Logan's mouth. Then, Elias spoke, saying nothing that the adolescent had imagined.
"Okay... That's okay."
Logan blinked, almost whispering, "What?"
Elias chuckled softly, "I said that's okay. I'll probably go against the way you're binding, but... Thank you for telling me."
The fear he felt previously melted into overwhelming relief that he still couldn't help but let his tears fall. This time, he covered his face so Elias wouldn't see the emotional mess he melted into. It was nothing new to the old man though. He's seen his child cry so many times he lost count, but he smiled because even he knew that those tears weren't tears of pain. Gently, he wrapped his arms around his son to give him a little bit of comfort.
"I thought you'd..." Logan wept, "I thought you weren't gonna love me anymore..."
"Shh..." Elias replied, "What would ever give you that idea?"
"I don't know, I just..." Logan broke down into silent sobs, forgetting what he was going to say.
"You know I'll love you no matter what."
After giving him a minute to let out his emotions, Elias broke away, looking at him with a small smile, "Alright. So, next big question: How do you want me to support you with this?"
Logan, still choked up on his tears, spoke with a broken voice, "Um... Well, I'd like to go by male pronouns, if that's nothing difficult for you."
"Okay. You have a name you want to go by?"
"Um, yeah... It's 'Logan'."
"'Logan'?"
"Mm-hmm."
Elias gave the teen a pat on the shoulder, "Logan Walker it is then."