"Once upon a time, actually at present time, the was a beautiful blonde girl."

Kendall appeared in thin air wearing Cinderella's clothes, and fell hitting her butt.

Kendall: Ow! Hey, what's with the outfit? Who wears these sort of clothes nowadays?

"Why, Cinderella does, of course."

Kendall: And who in the name of Roosevelt is Cinderella?

"Cinderella is kind. She was made a servant in her own home by her evil stepmother and stepsisters, Anastasia and Drizezella. However, she maintains hope through her dreams of happiness and someday finding her true love."

Kendall: Ohhh that's right, I remember reading that book at the library once.

"Oh you did, did you know? Then you do know who's playing the lead part?"

Kendall: Well duhh, me of course, with these rags.

"Very good. Well, I made a few modifications in the story."

Kendall: Such as?

"You will die"

Kendall: Say what-now?

"Oh I'm sorry, the pages are stuck together, hold on."

Kendall: Whew!

*7 SECONDS LATER*

"There, sorry for the delay. (Clears throat) You will stab your finger on a spinning wheel and THEN you will die. Sorry for the mix-up.

Kendall: You can't be serious.

"Deadly serious"

Kendall: (sigh) Fine. But no more delays.

"Oh, and there's one other thing.

Kendall: Let me guess. Kick has been turned into a hideos beast and you want me to confess my love for him or he'll die.

"Uh...yeah"

Kendall: So it's a mix of Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty and Beauty and the Beast. Anything more?

"No, that's pretty much it. You think you can handle it?"

Kendall: Hey, they don't call me the "Queen of elegance" for nothing, you know! Of course I can. Wait, who's the prince? It better not be Ronaldo, I'm not letting that frogmouth come even close to these! (pointed at her lips)

"Oh no, he'll get what he deserves."

Kendall: Good. Now, let's get this started already.

"As you wish."

The title screen appeared, saying "Kenderella and the Beast".

Kendall: Pretty good. You know, for a narrator, you're not a total wreckage.

"Oh...thank you...I think."

Kenderella was walking downot a small town, and everyone said hi to her. She politely waved back at them while slowly strolling through the town. "Woah, what a babe!" said a handsome man in the crowd, making Kendella blush and flip her hair, but replied by giggling "Sorry, I have a boyfriend."

Handsome man: What? Who? I'm sure he's not pretty.

"Uh-oh, this is your first obstacle, now what do you do?"

Kenderella: Easy, I just tell him I'm not interested.

"That won't work, he'll just keep bothering you."

Handsome man: Who're you talking to?

Kenderella: Ok, just erase him from the story then.

"Done."

Then, the narrator took his pencil and erased the handsome man.

Handsome man: Hey!

Kenderella: Phew! Easier than I thought, we make a pretty good team.

"Anytime, toots."

Kenderella: Don't call me that.

"Got it."

As Kenderella were walking through the town, she came across a weird old woman selling handheld mirrors and spinning wheels.

Old woman: Hello, little one. Care to buy a handheld mirror? Or a spinning wheel? Or both?

Kenderella: Yeah, a spinning wheel would help my chores, I'll take one! I have to hurry though, my stepsisters wants me to buy them a new laptop. Technology today.

Old woman: I see. That will be 1 pound, please.

Kenderella: Yeah, I left my pounds in my other rags. How much in dollars?

Old woman: 20 dollars.

Kenderella: Here you go. (She slipped her a 20 dollar bill)

"Careful Kenderella, don't stab yourself on the needle."

Kenderella: Just relax, I know what I'm doing.

"Okay, if you say so."

She arrived at the computer store to buy a laptop for her stepmother, and entered.

Clerk: May I help you, miss?

Kenderella: Hi, I'd like to buy a laptop. Nothing too expensive, please, I don't have that much cash.

Clerk: Sure thing, miss. (He gave her a box from the shelf which said 'netbook')

Kenderella: (Inspected the box closely) Does it also have LAN? My stepsisters don't get out of the house much.

Clerk: Why? Are they that lazy?

Kenderella: No, because our house is surrounded by brambles so it's hard to get out.

Clerk: It should have it.

Kenderella: Great, I'll take it!

Clerk: That'll be 70 dollars, please.

Kenderella: 70 bucks!? What's it made of, solid gold?

Clerk: I'm sorry, but that's the cheapest one we have in stock.

Kenderella: But I don't have 70 dollars.

Clerk: (grinned) Well, maybe there is someway you can pay. (He looked at her) Tell you what, since you look like such a lovely young lady, I'll lower the the price just for you, but...(He leaned towards her) ...don't tell my boss, there'd be hell to pay.

Kenderella: Wow! Thanks! I owe you.

Clerk: No need. You have a nice day.

Kenderella gave him a 50, which he accepted and waved her off with a friendly smile. She hummed to herself while she continued walking with the box under her arm. Meanwhile, in a different part of town, prince Kick was on his way to give hair restorer to his pet naked porcupine, when his brother appeared.

Kick's brother: Hi Kick.

Kick: (startled) AHHH! (He dropped hair restorer formula over himself) Gunder, look what you did!

Gunder: Sorry, bro.

Kick: It's ok, it should take a while before it starts growing.

Gunder: That's a relief. Wanna go down to Jester Burger and grab a burger?

Kick: Yeah, why not, I am pretty hungry. Let's go!

Kick and Gunder walked through town, when the people they passed by got terrified because the hair formula had transformed Kick into a ferocious beast, without him noticing. He noticed some women passing out from the sight of him.

Kick: Yup, still got it.

Gunder: Uhh, Kick? (handed him a handheld mirror)

Kick: (Looked at himself) What the-? It's already been working? Now what do I do?

Man: Look! A monster!

Kick: I'm not a monster! It's me, prince Kick.

Man: (sarcastic) Oh sure. And I'm Donald Duck.

Gunder: Wow, Donald Duck! (shook his hand nervously) I always wanted to meet you, I'm your biggest fan! Or was it Scooby Doo?

Man: Someone get help!

Kick: I'm telling you, I'm the prince!

Woman: And how do we know that?

Man: Yeah, prove it.

Right then, Kenderella came along with her laptop and spinning wheel, and stopped when she noticed the commotion.

Kenderella: Whoa-whoa-whoa, what's with all the hullabaloo?

Man: This monster claims he's the prince.

Woman: Lock him away before he eats our children!

Kenderella: Monster? This I got to see. (walked away)

Man: Where you going? That monster will tear us up!

Kenderella: Who, this guy? (pointed her thumb at Kick) This is not a monster, it's my boyfriend, prince Kick.

Villagers: What!?

Kenderella: I can prove it, here, hold my stuff.

She handed her stuff to the villagers, but at the same time she accidentally stabbed her finger on the spinning wheel needle, and the chock made her fall to the ground, lifeless.

Man: She's dead.

"Ok I'm back from my lunch break, did I miss anything?"

Kick: Kenderella stabbed herself on the spinning wheel needle!

"Oh for pete's sake! I told her to be careful but did she listen? N-o-o-o-o, she said she knew what she was doing. No worries, though, she's not dead."

Kick: Oh thank biscuits!

"She just needs to be awakened by a true love's kiss from a prince, and by prince, I don't mean a wild hairy beast."

Kick: Biscuits! Any chance you guys have any prince blood in you?

Villagers: Sorry, you're the only one.

Gunder: I'll do it.

"Whoa whoa whoa there, that doesn't work! It has to be the prince, not the prince's brother. Follow the story, will you!"

Gunder: Fine, fine.

Kick: Where am I supposed to find a prince?

"Have you looked in the mirror lately?"

Gunder: Can a mirror be prince? I never knew that.

Kick: But you said hairy beasts can't kiss sleeping beauties.

"True. But how fast can you shave it off?"

Kick: I can do it in at least 30 seconds.

Gunder: Any of you guys got a shaver?

Man: What's a shaver? Hasn't been invented yet.

Kick: You're kidding me, right?

Man: Yeah, did that get you?

Gunder: Totally, that was really good!

Man: Thanks. Heads up! (Tossed Kick his shaver and he caught it)

Kick: Hey thanks!

Man: You're welcome. Lucky I always carry my shaver around for emergencies.

Gunder: What kind of emergencies?

Man: Like if there's a heavy hairicane! Get it?

Gunder: Hahahahaha! Good one!

Kick quickly shaved off his fur. "There we go.", he said, but then his fur grew back. "What the-?" he said, and checked the expirition date label of the hair tonic formula bottle.

Kick: Expirition date 21 05 3031!? That's just swell, I'm stuck like this while my girlfriend is doomed.

Gunder: Don't worry, bro. I'm sure she'll take care of herself.

Kick: I sure hope you're right, I don't wanna lose her.