All mistakes are mine. I'm sorry

Dean Winchester was happy, just happy and content. For the first time in his adult life, Dean Winchester was happy.
After he and Sam had saved the world, again, they decided to quit.

Of course that was easier said than done. After the battle Castiel had become human. The Winchesters had taken an unconscious Castiel to the bunker, where they laid him down on his bed and tended to his wounds.

Castiel screamed in the middle of the night. Dean and Sam ran to Cas' door. Dean only in his T-Shirt and boxer and Sam in his flannel PJ-bottoms and grey T-Shirt. Sam shoved his hair out of his face, while Dean opened the door.
Castiel was screaming and rolling around on the bed.

"No! No! Please!" Castiel screamed. Dean basically ran to Castiel and caught in a hug from behind.

"You can go back to bed." Dean said to Sam, "I've got this."

Sam nodded yawned and walked out of Cas' room.

Castiel had stopped screaming, but now he was crying.

"It's okay, Cas." Dean whispered, "You're safe."

Castiel's cries turned silent.

"Dean?" He said confused. Dean tried to let go of Cas, but Cas had grabbed his hands tightly.

"I had failed you." He whispered. "You and Sam."

"Cas-" Dean tried to interrupted him, but Cas didn't stop talking.

"You and Sam were in hell. Lucifer was torturing you. He ribbed out my wings, I couldn't do anything."

"It's okay, Cas." Dean comforted Cas, "We're safe."

Castiel let go of Dean's hands, but Dean didn't break the hug.

"I still lost my wings." He mumbled, "I'm useless now."

Dean let go of Cas so fast, that it seemed like he had burned his hands. He put his hands and Cas' shoulders and turned him around.

"Don't you ever think that!" Dean said, "You are important!"

Cas hugged Dean again. It was awkward and uncomfortable since they were still on the bed. Castiel's hips were twisted in a way that seemed painful, but yet he didn't seem to mind. Just hugging Dean like he was a life buoy.

Dean just let Cas hug him, he didn't know what else to do. He patted Cas' hair softly. And then it happened Cas kissed Dean. Dean was surprised and didn't know what to do. When Cas felt that he immediately pulled back.

"I'm sorry." Cas said, but Dean didn't want to hear it and kissed Cas. First Cas stiffened and then he kissed back. Cas slowly opened his mouth and Dean let his tongue slip in. He explored every corner of Cas mouth and Cas moaned softly. Cas turned his hips around so he could kiss Dean better, while Dean moved his hands up Cas' hair.
Cas pushed Dean down under him and broke the kiss.

"Close the door." Dean said. Cas nodded and made his way to the door. He closed it softly not wanting to risk waking up Sam and locked the door.

Since that night Cas and Dean had been in a relationship. The first time Sam had seen them kissing, he had whispered "Destiel" just loud enough for Dean to hear it. Which Dean had responded to by kissing Castiel with more passion.

When Dean had mentioned quitting with hunting to Cas, he had simply responded with: "Does this mean we can get a dog?"

Dean had laughed and kissed him softly on top of his head.

"What about the bunker?" Sam asked. "I mean, are we going to live in it or are we going to get our own place? And so yes what are we going to do with the bunker?"

"We could give it to the rest of the hunters?" Dean said with his mouth full of pie, "You know like some kind of safe house."

"That's actually not a bad idea." Sam said.

"What's a good idea?" Cas asked when he walked in the room and sat next to Dean on the couch. Dean laid down on the couch and rested his feet on Cas' legs.

"Giving the bunker to the other hunters as a safe space." Sam said and started tapping on his phone.

"It was my idea." Dean said leaning in to kiss Cas, but Cas turned away.

"Dean, I'm not kissing you when you have food in your mouth." He said. Dean swung his feet of Cas' legs and said: "Fine, I'll swallow if that makes you happy."

As soon as Dean had swallowed his food, Cas kissed him on the lips. Dean pushed Cas under him. Cas tugged at Dean's hair.

"Get a room you two!" Sam said and he threw a piece of paper at them. Dean broke the kiss and Cas pulled himself up.

"I apologize, Sam." Cas said.

It only took them a week to find an apartment. It took them another one to move out. The apartment was nice, it had two bedrooms, one for Cas and Dean the other for Sam, a bathroom, an okay kitchen and a living-dining area.
Sam said that he probably wouldn't stay that long. He ended up staying three months, only to find a girl and move to her apartment. Dean found work in a garage, Castiel worked as a Liberian. They got married after a year. Everything was normal. Everything was fine.

It was a lazy Sunday and Dean and Castiel were spending the entire day in bed. Just lazy kisses and watching TV.

"Dean?"

"Yes, Cas?"

"Do you want kids?"

Dean dragged his attention away from the TV and looked at Cas.

"Why do you ask?" Dean asked confused. Cas sighed.

"I know you miss Ben and I see the way you look at children. Don't try to deny it Dean Winchester."

"I'm not denying it." Dean said and he looked at his hands, "It's just complicated."

"Dean, the hunters have deleted any criminal activity of you and Sam. Nothing is holding us back."

Cas turned on his side to take a better look at Dean.

"We could buy a house with a white fence and a yard. We could have a dog."

"Why do you want a dog so bad, Cas?" Dean asked.

"You are avoiding my question."

"I just don't think I'll make a good dad." Dean said it like it was nothing. Cas sat up and looked at Dean with shock in his eyes.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, after my dad I didn't really get to right coaching, you think? And then with Ben. I'm no good, Cas. I mean look what I did to you."

Cas grabbed Dean's chin softly an turned his head around, so they faced each other.

"Dean Winchester," He said slowly, "Don't you ever think that. You made me see how wonderful life could be, even without wings. You loved me trough everything and I love you more than anything."

Castiel ended his speech with a kiss on the lips, then on the nose and then on the forehead. Dean rested his hand on Castiel's cheek, slowly moving his thumb up and down.

"I'll think about, okay?"

"Okay. Now, make love to me." Cas said and he dragged Dean down with him.

Late that night Dean could not sleep. Careful, trying not to wake Cas, Dean untangled himself from the embrace Cas had trapped him in. Cas turned in his sleep, but did not wake up. Dean stood up and walked softly to the dining room. He opened the laptop and started typing.

Cas groaned when his alarm went off. He slammed it off and searched with his hands for the warm body next to him, but instead of that he found an empty cold spot. Cas was immediately alert and stoop up from the bed. Castiel listened, he could hear the sound of someone tapping on a keyboard and he relaxed. Cas opened the door.

"Dean?" He asked, "What are doing? Have you been up all night?"

Dean turned around and saw his husband standing in the bedroom door.

"I've been looking things up." Dean answered, "There are different kinds of adoption: You have closed adoption or an open adoption. You can adopt a teenager or a baby. You need to fill in forms and there will be-"

Before Dean could say something else Cas had kissed him.

"I love you." Cas said.

"I love you too."

1 year later

A cry in the middle of night woke Dean up. He groaned and closed his eyes, but the crying continued.

"I'll go." A voice from Dean's right side said and the bed squeaked when Cas stood up. Dean laid for a minute with his eyes closed and opened them again when he heard to voice of his husband trough the baby monitor on his nightstand.

"Shh, Charlie. You woke up me and daddy. Daddy needs his sleep for the garage tomorrow. Shh, it's okay, it's okay. I'm here, I'll always be here, I'll always be watching over you."

Dean smiled at those words, but he quickly lost his smile when the monitor was suddenly cut off.

"Probably just the batteries." He said to calm himself down, but that completely failed when Charlie started crying again. Dean grabbed a gun from under the bed and loaded it. Softly and carefully he started to walk to the nursery room. The door squeaked when Dean opened it and he looked inside. Cas wasn't there, but Charlie was crying in his crib.

"Hey, hey, hey. It's okay big guy." Dean said and he raised Charlie from the crib and held him in his arms. Dean turned around but stopped when he heard something dripping. Dean panicked and for the first time in a long time he started praying.

'No, please.' Dean prayed. Dean looked up and all his fears came true.

Castiel was pinned on the ceiling, a big bloodstain covered his grey AC/DC shirt, that he had borrowed from Dean. Cas' eyes were wide with shock.

"Cas!" Dean yelled and Charlie started crying again. Flames blazed from behind Cas. Dean's legs weren't working. He wanted to get Cas. It was getting to hot in the room and it was getting hard to breath. Then Dean did something he knew he would regret the rest of his life, he ran.

"Sir, we need to check you for burns." A kind male paramedic said.

"I'm fine." Dean mumbled, but he still let the male paramedic take care of him.

"How's Charlie?" He asked paramedic.

"There was some smoke in his lungs, but he'll be fine."

"Look," the paramedic said, "this isn't really what I'm here for, but if there's anyone you want to call."

Dean gave him Sam's number. Sam arrived within ten minutes.

"Dean?" Sam said and Dean looked up with tears in his eyes.

"He's dead, Sam. He's gone." And Dean started crying uncontrollably. Sam hugged his brother. The same brother whom had calmed him down after he saw Jessica die and now it was Sam whom he to comfort Dean.

"How's Charlie?" Sam asked.

"Charlie's fine." Dean said between his cries, "It was my night, but Cas went out instead. It should have been me."

For now Sam would let his brother cry and grief, but there was one thing Sam was sure of. He wouldn't let his brother go down the same road as his father.

Over his dead body.