"So...so get this Simon..." Alvin said, holding his sides and giggling, "You're supposed to pull me close, and call me you "Darling chipmunk lover" before picking me up and carrying me to bed!" he howled with laughter, falling to the floor and rolling. Simon wasn't doing much better, he'd been laying on his belly, listening to Alvin read the latest bad fan fiction he'd found about him and his brother.

"Let me guess, we make sweet, gentle love, with no lubrication or prep work for you, and it magically feels amazing for you and doesn't hurt at all?" He asked, taking his glasses off and whiping the tears from his eyes.

"Why would you ever think that?" Alvin giggled, "and then, we talk about how we don't even like girls, and all we've wanted was eachother, but were too scared to admit it."

"Such tripe, I'm surprised they had the courage to put such hogwash online," Simon replied.

"Yeah, you and me, only wanting eachother and not liking girls. Thats so stupid. I mean," he shuffled his foot a little on the carpet, "If I were, you know, gay, and you weren't my brother, I guess you'd be okay to date."

"Um, yeah. I mean, if we were gay, which we're certainly not," Simon replied, looking uncomfortable, "and we weren't brothers, I'd have to say I'd be lucky to have a boyfriend like you."

"Oh, and why is that Si?" Alvin asked, wiggling his eyesbrows, causing Simon to blush.

"Um...well...you're very sweet when you're dating someone, so I know you'd treat me well..."he trailed off, blushing. Alvin inched closer to his brother, smiling wickedly.

"Yeah, I feel the same way, you'd be really sweet and charming and romantic with me..." he whispered, leaning in, his lips almost touching Simon's. At the last second, Simong growled and pushed Alvin away.

"Yes! I win, I'm the reigning undefeated champion of Gay Chicken!" Alvin cried, pumping his fist in the air in victory

"I only let you win cause I know how important it is to you, Alvin." Simon muttered, but wasn't heard over Alvin's celebrating.