Hello everyone and welcome to Vampi, Spidey, and Sonja. This is a Spider-Man/Red Sonja/Vampirella team-up. There will a lot of action, drama, and loving moments in this story. Points on continuity, Peter and Mary Jane dated but never got married so OMD never happened. And while I do like the romance Peter and Mary Jane have, I'm not making them a couple in this, especially when he has two sexy bad guys by him.

The second thing is that Spider Island ended to months ago, so everyone is taking a break for now. Kaine will be seen in this story and Adriana aka the Queen is dead. She's not coming back.

And finally this version Red Sonja will be how she was first introduced so yeah... unless a man can beat her in a fight she cannot sleep with them. Spidey will get a harem later on. Alright, let's get on with the story.

Disclaimer: Spider-Man is owned by Marvel. Red Sonja and Vampirella are owned by Dynamite Entertainment. Other Marvel and Dynamite characters will appear plus a certain bad girl.


SEASON 1

Chapter 1: Reunion

It is early in the morning as Peter Parker, unknown to the world as Spider-Man, woke up and slowly sat up to stretch his arms. "Best sleep I have had in years", Peter said to himself quietly. Peter sat up slowly and looked to his sides to see both Vampirella and Red Sonja in bed with him. "I better get ready for work. I don't want to wake up the girls", Peter said as he was trying to get out of bed. From out of no where a pair of arms reached up and wrapped around his neck.

Peter was pulled down and had his face placed into the bosom of Vampirella whom Peter nicknamed Vee. Peter had to marvel at her with her long jet black hair with alluring green eyes and her shapely figure. She smiled at Peter and kissed him gently. "Good morning Peter", She said seductively.

"Good morning Vee", Peter said. "So, how are you feeling right now?"

"I'm feeling fine, thank you for asking. What I want is how are you so good in bed?" Vee asked flirtatiously. Before Peter could say anything, another woman rose up and glared at them.

"Would you two please stop? It's too early in the morning for this. Peter, you have get ready for work plus Carol told me to make sure you do not by late", the redhead said to them.

"Right, sorry Sonja. I better get ready for work then", Peter said before getting out of bed and turned to Vee. "Sorry Vee, let's continue later on". Peter then left to get ready while Vee smile before glaring at Sonja.

"You just love to ruin a good time don't you?" Vee said. Sonja glared at Vee in response.

Peter suited up and looked to both women. "Vee, Sonja, be nice to each other while I'm gone", Peter said as the women gave him a "really?" look. "Last time, you both tried to kill each other because of a movie. I don't want that to happen again. Also I'll be getting off work early so we're having spaghetti for dinner, tonight". Sonja beamed with a wide grin while Vee smirked and shook her head.

"Alright have a good day at work", they said as he was making his way out.

While web swinging through the city of New York, Peter could only think of how he was in the position he was in. All it started three months ago.


*3 Months Ago

It was late night in New York City when Peter swung through the night trying to get home. Peter had just gotten off of work and was headed home to relax. Especially since most of his day consisted of working on a new device at Horizon Labs and fighting villains. He started thinking back to what happened the past few months.

First, J Jonah Jameson became mayor of New York. And tried to have the police force hunt him down and arrest him on the spot. Of course Jonah never liked Spider-Man but this was just insane. Plus Peter remembered the days he spent working for Jonah.

"Thank goodness I don't have to work for Jonah and hopefully never again", Peter said to himself.

Peter realized how cheap Jonah was when it came to money back then. All of the issues Peter had to deal with were mainly because of Jameson. It also didn't help that because Jameson kept money to himself Peter had been in debt several times before. The fact that Jameson has it out for Spidey was another turn off and no matter what he did Jameson tried to make him out to be the villain. So not working for Jameson was a good thing indeed.

Second, he was a member of the Avengers. Earth's Mightiest heroes rebuilt after the events in which Norman Osborne led HAMMER into attacking Asgard over Oklahoma. Finally putting the man that continued to ruin his life behind bars was a really good feeling.

Third, the Superhero Registration Act (SRA) was repealed. Let's just say that having it gone allowed all heroes to breathe again and move on from what happened. Everyone wanted to forget about the Civil War that happened.

Fourth, Peter was now a scientist working for Horizon Labs. Something that Peter always wanted to be was a scientist and now here he is. Plus, unlike Jameson, Max Modell the owner of Horizon Labs, was much nicer. It also helps that the pay was considerably better.

And Finally, the aftermath of Spider Island. Old enemies return in the form of the Queen and the Jackal, almost everyone in Manhattan become spider people, and Kaine (Peter's clone and brother) returns from the dead and helped defeat the Queen who turned into a giant Spider-Queen.

Sadly Peter's girlfriend at the time named Carlie Cooper broke up with him after finding out he was Spider-Man. I guess she didn't understand the concept of a secret identity. Well, either way Peter's single again.

"Maybe web swinging will help clear my head a bit", Peter said as he continued swinging.

Unbeknownst to Peter a figure was lurking in the shadows watching him. This figure had red skin, demonic looking wings, and black tore clothing. Interestingly enough this figure was a woman.

"Looks like I've found my next meal", she said with evil intentions.

Spider-Man continued swinging until he came upon a situation in the streets and went to see what was going on. "Alright, some action!" Webhead said as he rushed to the scene.

A man in a ski mask was holding an elderly woman at gun point demanding money as the woman scrabbled to gather it. "Hurry up or I'll shoot!" the man yelled as the woman began to give the man the money wanted. Before the man could pack it away the gun in his hand was whisked away by webbing. "Ah crap, Spider-Man!"

"Yep, that's me. I always appear to stop crime and look good while doing so", Spider-Man said. The man pulled out a pocket knife attempting to cut the Webhead. This didn't work as Spidey back flipped and kicked the knife out of the man's hand.

"Crap!" The man said as he tried to make a run for it only to have his legs webbed up.

"Sorry pal but you know the saying; 'Can't do the time don't do the crime'", Spidey quipped.

Soon enough a blinding light appeared in the sky miles away so after webbing the man up and giving the money back to cashier, our favorite Webhead swung away to find where the light came from. Moments later Spider-Man arrived only for his eyes to widened with what he saw. A redhead woman was fighting against the police. What's strange is that she wore nothing but a chain mail bikini. Spidey had to stop and think as if he knew this woman somehow.

"The only way to know is to find out", Spider-Man said as he swung down.

The woman threw a male police officer to the side after he tried to tackle her. "Foolish man, no one attempts to touch me and not feel pain!" She yelled. Having had enough another police officer pulled out his gun and fired one shot at her, shooting her in the shoulder.

"AAAHH", she screamed while grasping her arm. "What kind of magic is this?!"

"Once again stop what you are doing or we will fire again!" An officer said.

"No one draws Sonja's blood without paying dearly", the now named Sonja said as she grabbed her sword and threatened to use it.

"Wait, stop, hold it!" Spider-Man said as he landed on the ground and tried to defuse the situation. "Just relax, everyone, relax".

"What the hell are you doing Spider-Man? We have this under control", the same officer said.

"Clearly you don't, that's why I'm here". Spidey walks over to Sonja, who has her sword pointed at him. "Hey relax, I'm not your enemy".

"Your also not my ally", Sonja said with a glare.

"Well that's fair but I could be. What's your name?" Peter asked.

"I am Red Sonja" Sonja said. That name started to get Spidey thinking as if he had met her before. Spidey decided that he would figure it out later.

"Well Sonja I'm Spider-Man and I'm here to help but I can't if you don't give me a chance. Just relax and I can help you out, please?" Spidey said and lifted his hand for her to shake. Sonja lowered her sword and went forward going for a hand shake...

That was until the officers got involved and tackled her to the ground.

"Hey, unhand me!" Sonja yelled. "You tricked me jester!"

"Whoa, I didn't set this up. If anything I'm just as mad as you are", Spider-Man said then turned to the officer in charge. "I was trying to talk her down from hurting someone or something".

"She's a mental patient Webhead, they can't be reasoned with", the officer said.

"If you keep attacking them like that, then they can't be reasoned with", Spidey continued.

"This is what we do. Now get out of here or else we'll place you under arrest, Menace", the officer threatened.

"You know that song "F da Police" by NWA? I'm starting to think they were right", Spidey quipped. Before the officer could say or do anything the red skinned demon swooped down and attacked the officers as they to put Sonja in the police car. She also managed to attack the police officer Spidey was talking to. Spidey jumped out of the way as his spider sense went off.

"I finally fund you, my next dinner", a voice rang out. Sonja and Spider-Man looked up to see the red skinned woman flying above them with her fangs out.

"Okay, this is new", Spider-Man said.

Elsewhere a raven haired woman in a trench coat with black pants, a red shirt, and a black high heeled boats and a gold necklace walked down the street when she caught a whiff of a familiar scent.

"Ah, so she's back", she said as fangs protruded from her her mouth as she smirked.

For those of you that have bee reading my Avengers story, I apologize for taking so long but the next chapter will be out sooner than you think. I have been having writer's block for a while now and just finished this first chapter. Next time Sonja and Spidey take on the mysterious demon lady and we find out how Sonja got here from the past.