AN: So I just finished college, and am currently in a game binge. Just finished P5 and Nier Automata; gonna go for Mass Effect next, so yeah. Anyway, I suddenly got this idea after finishing ending A-E, and some joke endings in Nier Automata, and playing FGO on my smartphone… This will be a CRACK Fic (I think). It's also been a while since I deeply immersed myself in the fate series' lore, so I might be mistaken in a few things, so please correct me on that if ever. I will also mark this as complete, since it's mostly a one-shot thing at this point.

Anyway, I'll warn y'all about spoilers now. Finish Nier Automata first and by that I mean, reach ending E.

Also, I do not own Nier Automata, nor any of the Fate series.

"Understood A2? You will be our designated guardian and observer for your world."

A2 does a salute towards Leonardo da Vinci, who was flanked by two other men. "Glory to Chaldea." A2 sarcastically states, evidenced by her smug smile.

One of the men, Mr. Schweinorg then giggles. "Your sarcasm amuses me. You can request a patented Kaleido-Jump by contacting us at the frequencies we've bookmarked on your device."

"Understood." A2 nodded towards Mr. Schweinorg and then looked towards the other man. "How will I repair myself?"

Dr. Romani then stepped up to explain. "Your device, Kaleido-Stick Crystal also has the spells pre-programmed inside, you just need to request for the proper spell to activate."

"Now, you need to get going or else the schedule for your world's fixed control points will not match and cause some interdimensional being to possibly enter." Mr. Schweinorg said cheerily, waving his hands as a colorful reflective portal appeared behind A2. "Remember, your main goal is to observe your world that has lost all its humans; aside from that, you have free-reign. Just remember that I am watching!" Mr. Schweinorg laughed as A2 smiled and jumped towards the portal.

"Did you just give her carte-blanche on doing whatever sir?" Dr. Romani said worriedly as they watched the portal close.

Leonardo da Vinci then gently pat Dr. Romani's back. "We're observing A2's evolution after all, no need to worry"

9S and 2B walked towards the famed king of the forest. A dangerously cute machine lifeform that coos cutely, and somehow even curls up in its blankets cutely.

"Is… This… Their king?" 9S asks, as both he and 2B walked up the steps towards the king of the castle.

2B then blocked 9S with her arm, preventing 9S from getting closer to the cute machine lifeform. "Do not underestimate it."

"Ro-Roger that 2B… So what do we do n—"

"Watch out 9S!" 2B then maneuvered the two androids away from the forest king of cuteness, as tagged pod 042.

"Looooooooook ouuuuuuut beloooooooooooow!"

Thus, the dangerously cute machine lifeform was no more. Mercilessly crushed to death by a white-haired android wearing a business suit.

"Hmph, the prana-based shields seem to be holding up fine. Some dust got through though. I should have packed more suits." The figure, an android, stated as it stood up and dusted its clothes off with its hands.

"2B! That's an Android!" 9S loudly announces beside 2B, who was thanking her foresight to always have her hearing functions dampened when the unexpected happens beside 9S.

"Huh? Oh, YoRHa-type androids, the gothic uniform was never really my style... Umm, per-chance did I accidentally land on you? For that I apologize" A2 bows apologetically, deciding to be civil with those she almost crushed, those she already crushed completely forgotten.

Alert: This unit is currently wanted by YoRHa. Annihilation Recommended. |Pod153

"Annihilation? But why?" 9S asked his pod, somewhat skeptical with the sudden situation he's in.

A2 seconded 9S' remark. "Haha! I second 9S! Why indeed… Umm… No chance YoRHa would just let bygones be bygones? I mean... Umm, it was just not working out with the—"

2B however, decided to be more prompt with her decision. "Let's go 9S."

"2B!" 9S wailed as 2B launched a slash at A2, only to be blocked by a red spear that materialized in A2's hands.

Alert: Old World Magic detected. Magical Elements have high probabilities of deflecting all attacks, as well as penetrating all defenses. |Pod042

Proposal: Request Back-up and evade.

"Urk!" A2 swats away 2B as she sets down the suit-case she was carrying. "Any chance that the two of you would just let me go? I really don't want to fight." A2 gets in a defensive stance, her eyes observing 2B. "Wait… Where did the other one go?"

"Gotcha!" 9S triumphantly announced as he hacked into A2… If A2 was still using this world's current systems. "Ack! Impossible. It's a self-replicating attack-based algorithm. How?"

"9S!" 2B went on defensive in front of her partner, as she received a transmission from the Bunker.

"Bunker to 2B and 9S, we have picked up a signal from the black box of a fugitive known as A2." YoRHa Commander's face then appeared on Pod 042's visual interface.

"Hey! Umm Commander… Any chance you'll just let me go? I'll even send in a resignation letter. You management types like that right?"

There was then a brief silence…

"What you see in front of you…" YoRHa Commander continues.

"Hey Commander! I know you can hear me! I know you want to look like a hard ass and all, but it's been like… Umm… Give or take 2 or 3 years? Can't you just let me go? I promise I won't spread your secret of leaving clothes all around… It's a well-known thing among all androids after all." A2 tried to reason with the visual feed of the YoRHa commander.

"… In front of you is your enemy." The YoRHa commander ordered.

"Affirmative. Designating castle wall to be enemy." 2B answered, as she decided to pick up random items on the ground that she found cool-looking.

"2B, this is an order."

"Geez you're a hard ass, can't you just let me go? I mean, I never really did anything to YoRHa aside from knowing you don't have humans on the moon." A2 said smugly picking up her suit-case, gaining 9S's curious attention, as well as 2B's much more serious attention.

"Reinforcements are on their way."

"Ugh, for the record, there are still humans; just not on the moon. Whatever you YoRHa folks have on the moon I don't want to know. I'll just do my mission, following direct orders from actual humans." A2 smugly explained, her posture looking like an android that's ready to bolt in 2B's perspective.

"W-What humans?"

"A2? W-What did you say? Now that I think about it… You're different."

"I won't repeat nor answer your queries. Due to orders. Also, some years spent with humans will really change any android… Especially with the ones I have been with. Bye."

"A2 Wait! 2B Chase her quickly!"

"On it." 2B dashed towards the castle's opening, 9S following closely behind.

Once the two reached the ground however, there was no A2 in sight.

"This is 9S to bunker, we have lost our target." 9S followed behind 2B who dashed towards the transporter on the wall. "Yep, we've lost our target, no visual contact."

"This is Command, patching you through to the Commander."

"… This is unfortunate. The search for A2 has been put on high priority, all Earth-Bound YoRHa teams have been notified. 2B, your other mission is canceled, the objective has already been achieved by someone else."

"Copy that commander. 9S and I will await further orders."

"Hey 2B, about the humans on the moon… Would you hear me out?" 9S asked, once their transmission cut-off.

"Of course, 9S"

"Well, I've had ideas since I was created." 2B stiffened, but immediately steeled herself and continued walking, listening to 9S. "The commander doesn't know it, but I have already hacked the YoRHa servers when I was first activated, I find it weird that empty containers are being shipped to the moon. It just doesn't make sense."

"I don't really care for such things 9S." 2B stoically answered.

"Haha! Tell me about it 2B." 9S laughed, as they continued walking. "Umm… I just realized, if I figured out the truth, like how A2 knows the truth, will you protect me from YoRHa?" 9S asks.

"Always 9S." 2B replies, making her sword float behind her.

"I thought I would have had to fight my way out" A2 sighs, as she hides behind the doorway inside the castle. "That 9S kid though, I'm pretty sure he found me"

A2 then peers outside. "Seems like no reinforcements are appearing and the android duo has left for root knows where; now it's time to set-up shop."

After Story AN: Yep, that's it for now. As the title states, A2 is a magical gir… Err Android on a mission to observe a world with no humans and how it affects the world's magical forces. I might continue this, or even refine it, once I finish my game binge, but yeah, it's a one-shot thing for now. Also, A2 is more carefree here, especially after going through some unspeakable things with Chaldea and "Mr. Schweinorg".