Finally! After months of absence, I'm finally posting a serious parental RoyEd fic again. As per usual, welcome to angst and sadness, that updates weekly~ It'll be an alphabet series- 26 interconnected oneshots, one for each letter of the alphabet. I have nearly all of them planned out, but feel free to make suggestions anyway! I could easily work in one or two suggestions later on. I'd love to promise oneshots as rewards, like the 50th reviewer gets one or whatever, but my ability to write on demand is nonexistent, so I don't want to promise something and then not be able to deliver. But, still, make suggestions for ideas you might want to see! If I end up using it, of course I'll credit you :) And, with that said... enjoy!

This time, when he returned, he didn't have to find out through a standard emergency telegram.

This time, he knew immediately, because this time Edward Elric had the decency to materialize out of thin air, drop out of the sky, and slam right into the carpet of his own living room.

Roy, one finger caught mid page-turn in his book, feet kicked up on his coffee table, slouched in a corner of his couch, gaped.

It was Ed, of course. The hair, even cut shorter, made it unmistakable. And if not the hair, then the automail was a dead giveaway. And really, even if he'd cut his hair all straight off and somehow picked up two flesh limbs on the other side, no one else that Roy knew would have had the gall to vanish for five years, subsequently invite himself in at two in the morning, via a brilliant flash of alchemic light no less, and all without so much as a hello.

Only Edward Elric.

It could only be him.

Roy simply continued to gape.

Unbelievable.

Literally, actually- he could not believe it.

Ed lay there on his side, slumped over his carpet like a half-dead, empty shell. He was gasping hard, huddled up and with wide eyes; he looked dazed but conscious, shaken but alive. No attention was being paid towards him, or even his surroundings at all- it was as if Ed wasn't even aware he'd just materialized out of nowhere and broken into his home. He just curled up there, wheezing, and staring at nothing- and... oddly calm.

Yes, that was the word for it- calm, in a way that he couldn't understand.

But it did not matter, because Ed was alive.

After several stunned seconds, during which Ed just slumped on the floor, ragged hair shielding his face from view, some tiny part of his mind finally kicked back on. The rest of him felt a million miles away, staring distant at the impossible sight with such shock he felt detached, disembodied- but the tiny part of Roy's mind that was still functioning smirked, finishing the page turn, and dragged the sly remark out past his dry throat before the rest of him had even remembered how to breathe. "I always did know you'd find a way back, Fullmetal," and he smiled, "but when I said that, I really didn't mean right into my living room."

After that, the part of Roy's mind that was not a snarky little shit would've hopefully turned on. It would've dragged him to his feet to lift Ed upright and berate him on terrifying the living daylights out of him, shake him until he was sure he was one hundred percent okay, and then, surely hugged the life out of him, because, damn it, Roy had always believed he'd make it back home somehow, but to finally see it like this-

There was no word for the sense of sheer relief he could feel growing inside of him, held at bay only by shock.

No word at all.

But, the rest of him never got that chance to act.

Because the moment the words had left his mouth, Ed's breath had caught.

His shaking form went still.

His human hand clenched, bunching the carpet fabric into a desperate fist.

Then, slowly, agonizingly slow like it took all his strength and willpower to do it and not just close his eyes to never see again, he he looked up.

And just like that, any trace of calmness and peace was gone.

"No..."

Because in their place was now horror.

At that pained, anguished wavering whisper, Roy found himself frozen, pinned to his couch with nothing more than that piercing stare. Slowly, in shock, Roy managed to shake it off, but his mind was still at a complete blank as he leaned forward, approaching him cautious inch by cautious inch. "...Ed-" he started hollowly, lifting a hand.

"N- no..." Ed breathed again, staring at him like he was the devil himself. He jerked back off the floor, reeling unsteadily to sit and stare around the room and gasp like a fish on dry land. "No, no, what? What-?" he was panting, shaking, "What am I- no! No, this isn't right, no! Why did you send me here?! NO!"

Snarky Little Shit Roy was immediately thrown into the backseat, and so, too, was Extremely Fucking Relieved Roy. He was on his feet before he knew what he was doing, reaching for him without the foggiest idea what was happening except that something was very, very wrong.

"Ed," he started, voice cracking.

"I didn't want this, no! Fuck you, Truth, take me back! No, NO, TAKE ME BACK! TAKE ME BACK!"

The wail was so loud and wretched it was nearly not even understandable. It was a bloodcurdling screech of suffering akin to a punch to the face, and Ed wasn't even looking at him, he realized, pounding his human fist on the carpet, thrashing his head back and forth like he was caught in a nightmare and couldn't wake up. It could almost be called screaming, the words lurching from him, but screaming implied a sort of ferocity and strength that this shattered, destroyed Ed just utterly lacked. His automail wasn't even moving, so disturbingly limp a part of Roy wondered if he could even move it at all. His face was thin and gaunt, the whole of him soaked and dripping with blood that the dim light of his room had disguised, but now that he stood closer was unmistakable- and those young, broken, almost inhuman sounds coming from him now...

Ed was alive.

Ed was home.

And, while part of him still reeled and struggled to understand even this, the rest of him knew: he was not okay.

Roy was on his knees beside him in an instant, reaching to hold him down. All he knew was that Ed needed help, and as unprepared as he was he was the only one there to give it. "Hey, hey, Ed, come on-" he began, then recoiled at trying to grip his arm. What? It hadn't felt right- it had been just, so- thin- "My god..."

Ed shook fiercely underneath him, dry heaving actual sobs and broken yells as he fought him off. He wasn't even close to being strong enough to manage it, but his desperation was so anguishing, so miserable to see, Roy had to withdraw. Whatever had gone wrong, whatever the hell had even happened, this wasn't something he could fix on his own. He wasn't enough for this, he wasn't even close to enough! Ed needed far more help than he could ever give.

"Ed, hang on. I'm calling an ambulance, just-"

"No!"

At first Roy thought it was just a response to what he'd said, but then he cried out again, tossing himself violently away to slam a fist to the floor again. "No, no, no, take me back, take me back! No! TRUTH! Fucking Truth, I know you can hear me, TAKE ME BACK!"

Roy scrubbed a trembling hand over his face, thoroughly shaken to his core. He couldn't tear his eye away from the heartrending sight, chest squeezing painfully with each anguished yell. He didn't know what this was, but in that moment, witnessing Ed out of his mind with anguish, watching him try to throw himself about like a trapped, cornered animal, too upset to even cry...

It reminded him, horrifically so, of all those soldiers in Ishval.

Those soldiers he'd been just a hint jealous of at the time, because they'd shattered as completely as a fragile glass vase, been stamped with brands like broken, unstable, and weak, and then, just like that, swept neatly onto the next train home.

He swallowed.

This was bad.

This was very, very bad.

"Ed," he gasped when he could speak again, part of him still begging to turn away from the devastating sight, "I..." God, what was he supposed to do? He couldn't- god, this wasn't something he could ever fix. He simply wasn't enough. Reaching for him again with a shaking hand, Roy started to ask him just where the one person was who could fix this, just desperate to do anything that he could. "Ed, where's Alphon-"

The question died in his throat, forever incomplete.

Understanding hit.

Oh...

Oh... god...

Ed, at the beginning of his brother's name, had again gone perfectly still.

Oh, god, no...

Then, slowly, the boy turned his head back to look at him.

Roy choked.

"YOU KILLED HIM!" he screamed, and lunged.