Chapter 1

A burst of applause drew Simon from a daydream in which he was a young boy again, nervously awaiting his first performance in front of an audience. He was much older now, and quite calm. Standing in the wing, he heard his introduction and walked onto the London Palladium stage. The audience exploded with enthusiastic applause. Positioning himself, he raised his violin to his shoulder, and the auditorium fell silent. For the thirty minutes, he gave himself over to the music. For many of the rapt listeners, this would be their first taste of the Vulcan themes he had woven into his Yanashite compositions. His was the only alien touch in this concert of sacred music and the reason why he had received permission to leave his duties as deacon at the Plum Creek retreat house and go on tour.

At the end of his performance Simon bowed before a standing ovation, and returning to the wing, sat down to watch the remainder of the concert. Tonight something new would be added—a choral group. He had first developed an interest in choirs while on Vulcan, where he trained the voices of young Yanashite children. His groundbreaking choirs still performed there at temple services.

The choral group took its place upon the stage. Adorned in purple robes, they broke into song, accompanied by a scaled-down version of the orchestra. Partway through the rendition of "Amazing Grace, My Chains are Gone", a young man and woman stepped forward and performed a poignant duet. The woman's angelic voice grabbed Simon's attention. Rising, he moved up by the curtain for a better look at the ethereal blonde beauty. Dane Sutton normally played in the orchestra as a first violinist, and she had seemed familiar from the first moment he saw her. Now, with something of a shock, he realized that they had both attended the Virginia Hatch Institute as children. Mesmerized, he watched the duet to its conclusion, noting how the two singers briefly touched hands before stepping back into the group. Then the choir ended its performance.

Simon remained standing until every one of its members passed him by and disappeared backstage. Only then did he turn and realize that for the first time in his musical career he had left his precious violin on his chair, unattended—let it out of his hands, out of his sight.

oooo

Back at the hotel, Simon spent a restless night thinking of the lovely vocalist. At breakfast there were no empty seats near her. He had to content himself with occasional glances as he ate at another table. Onstage she had worn her hair in an elaborate style, but now it hung long and loose, like golden silk. Either way, she looked ravishing.

After breakfast, the troupe gathered in the lobby. As their tour director issued travel instructions, Simon held tight to his violin case and edged over to the young woman's side. She did not seem to notice him until he began to speak, and when she turned, her vivid blue eyes and thick lashes made him stammer.

"Dane…Dane Sutton. Didn't…didn't we go to school together? In San Francisco?"

Her cheeks flushed a delicate shade of rose, and she said, "I'm surprised you remember me."

His heart was racing so fast that he could barely think. "Why? Why wouldn't I remember?"

"You were always the prize pupil, the star."

"Everyone in that school had talent."

"Not like yours."

Her praise embarrassed him. He may have been the "star", but he was almost expelled a time or two. Casting about for something more to say, he declared, "You sing beautifully."

At that she smiled, and Simon felt as if the whole universe tilted and spun, leaving him a little dizzy.

oooo

In Paris, Simon invited her to dinner. The concerts left time for a meal in a little restaurant along the Seine. A cold rain kept them indoors, but the breathtaking panorama of city lights reminded him of the view from his father's balcony before the San Francisco earthquake. He mentioned the fact to Dane and her face grew sad.

Softly she said, "Did you lose anyone…in the quake?"

"Not family," he replied. "My mother was trapped in the rubble, along with my brother and sister and little niece, but we got them out."

She sighed. "You're lucky. Both my parents were killed. I was an only child, so it's just me now."

Simon's heart went out to her. "I'm sorry I brought it up. I know how hard it can be. I lost my mom and kid sister a few months after the quake."

Dane gave him a sympathetic look. "Yes, it was in the news. At the time, I remembered you and I thought, how terrible…"

She had remembered him!

Simon gazed into her eyes. Boldly he reached across the table and touched her hand. Her fingers closed on his, and the food on his plate lay forgotten.

oooo

Early on, Simon's father had made sure that his hormonal system and that of his younger brother were tested for Vulcan elements. Since the tests were negative and there was no possibility of entering pon farr, Simon had not felt pressured to begin dating. In all his twenty-two years, he had never once kissed a girl. First music and baseball had been his life…and then God. Until Dane, there had been no room in his heart for any other passion.

Now, for the first, he thought of marriage.

The troupe had moved on to Vienna. After enjoying a lunch together, Simon and Dane were walking hand-in-hand through a park when she asked, "Is it true that you had some trouble with your hearing? That you couldn't play music for a while? And there were stories that…that you gave up on life and entered a seminary on Vulcan."

Simon stopped beside a flowerbed and said, "Yes, for a while there was a problem with the way I heard music. And yes, I am studying to be a Yanashite priest, but that doesn't mean that I've given up on life. It means that I'm embracing it."

"A…priest?" Though she did not mention the word "celibacy", it seemed to hang in the winter air.

For a moment Simon did not know how to approach the delicate subject. Then, with his eyes on the flowers, he simply told her, "Yanashite priests can marry and have families."

They looked at one another and his mind yearned to explore her thoughts, but the recent years of Vulcan exercises kept his shields firmly in place. Scarcely breathing, he drew closer, slowly leaned in, and pressed his lips to her welcoming mouth. Dane's arms went around him, and holding her slim body tight, he experienced his first kiss.

oooo

In Moscow's snow, Dane's singing partner developed laryngitis. The popular duet was in danger of cancellation when Simon asked to audition for the male part. Though his baritone voice had not been formally trained, his rendition satisfied the choral master and he was allowed to sing at the next seven performances. Sharing the stage with Dane so thrilled him that he often lay awake at night reliving each precious moment. He began to wish that the tour would never end, but inevitably that final day arrived. Between performances, he managed to steal a moment alone with her under a full South African moon. It was the height of summer in that hemisphere, and the night air was pleasantly warm.

They sat on a secluded park bench. As Dame nestled against him, Simon's heart ached at the thought of leaving her. Gathering his courage, he said, "Dane, I…I want you to know that I love you."

Her face turned to him, eyes open wide. "I love you, too, Simon. I think I always have."

Holding each other, they kissed, and Simon thought he would burst with joy. "Come home with me," he urged. "Come to Plum Creek and meet my family."

Dane straightened. As she withdrew from his arms, Simon sensed a sharp emotion that seemed very much like fear.

"Oh, Simon," she said. "I don't know…"

"What do you mean? What's wrong?"

She hesitated. "I have to get back to Boston."

It was a weak excuse. He knew that she was not due back at the Philharmonic for another week. "Dane, you'll love Plum Creek. Just a little mountain cabin and a Yanashite retreat house. You can stay out in one of the rooms."

She hung her head, as if ashamed to speak. Softly she said, "Your home sounds like a wonderful place. That's not the problem. It's just…" And she fell silent.

Simon's heart sank. "It's me, then."

She shook her head. "No. It's not you. You're not like them…"

"Them?"

She wiped at her eyes and he realized that she was crying. He had always been so careful of her mental privacy, but now, as he reached for her, only one thing seemed to matter. He must understand.

Touching Dane's face, he brushed the edges of her mind so gently that she did not even notice the intrusion. But no matter how he might try to justify his behavior, the act was deliberate and it was wrong. As he struggled with his guilt, he saw the reason for her tearful reluctance to meet his family. So she was not an angel, after all. Well, neither was he.

Letting his hand drop, he said, "There's no reason to be afraid. Vulcan hybrids aren't so very different from humans." Then a terrible thought struck him. "You're not into CUE, are you? Those people who don't want any aliens on Earth?"

"Me? No." She did not question how he knew what she meant by "them". Ironically, she said, "But Vulcans can read your mind."

Simon's stomach went leaden. Gently he said, "Look at me."

In the moonlight, she raised her tear-dampened eyes to his.

He asked, "Do I scare you?"

"No," she breathed.

He swallowed hard. "I look very human, don't I?"

She nodded.

"The Vulcan part of me doesn't show, but it's still there. It's inside."

Her body tensed and she drew back. "You mean that you…"

"I'm a touch telepath. A Yanashite priest must be telepathic."

Bolting to her feet, she stared at him. "You know everything…everything I've been thinking?"

He felt that he could honestly answer "No." Not everything. "There are mental shields that prevent our thoughts from overlapping. Yet if you wanted, we could meld. You would know a true meld was happening."

Dane did not seem convinced. Their final hours in South Africa were awkward, and they parted with neither a kiss nor a promise.

oooo

"Something's happened," T'Naisa said to Spock as she prepared their year-old daughter for bed.

Spock watched little Tess clutch playfully at the warm pink pajamas T'Naisa was struggling to put on her.

T'Naisa explained, "Simon hasn't been the same since he got back from the tour. I can tell he's unhappy."

"Indeed," Spock said. "I suspect it is the lure of his music. He may be having second thoughts about the priesthood."

"He could stay a gol'nevsu…a deacon. He doesn't have to go on."

Spock nodded his agreement. "If there is no change in the morning, I will speak to him."

They were sitting down to breakfast when Simon's baritone voice rang through the clearing. Still singing, he burst into the cabin and took his usual seat at the family table.

Smiling brightly, he said, "Good morning!" And proceeded to eat with an appetite that had been lacking for days.

His brother James downed the last of his food and ran to catch the airbus for school. Tess drummed her spoon on the tray of her high chair and began to loudly sing "Baa, Baa, Black Sheep".

"Tessie, hush!" T'Naisa rebuked her. "Whatever happened to my snarth-proof baby? The sweet, quiet one. Remember?"

Tess fell silent and frowned.

"Really, T'Naisa," Spock remarked in a dry tone, "as if she would actually recall the days following her birth." He knew that his wife had not meant her words literally, but felt inclined to tease her.

Before T'Naisa could respond, Simon suddenly looked up from his plate and said, "Father, T'Naisa…I have a friend coming to visit…a fellow musician."

Ah, Spock thought. So it is the music, after all.

T'Naisa smiled. "Wonderful. When is he coming?"

Simon's handsome face seemed to flush. "Saturday. Only…"

The silence stretched.

"Yes?" Spock prompted.

Simon set down his fork and chose his words carefully. "There's a problem. You see, this friend of mine…has never been around Vulcans…and is a little bit apprehensive."

Spock raised a brow. "You may tell him that we will be especially unintimidating, for his sake."

T'Naisa stifled a laugh.

Simon's eyes flashed with sudden anger. Rising from his chair, he said, "This isn't a joke. My friend is not a 'he'. She's a woman I care deeply about, and I'm only asking that you be nice to her."

Startled, Spock shared a brief glance with T'Naisa. A woman! Until now, Simon had never shown more than a passing mild interest in any young lady. This would explain Simon's moods.

He looked at his son. "Rein in your temper. We will be nice to her."

"We're always nice," T'Naisa insisted. "Aren't we, Spock? Aren't we always nice?"

"Most assuredly," Spock replied. "And for Simon's sake, we will be…extra nice."

With a huff, Simon strode out of the cabin.

Spock turned to his wife and could not help but smile a little.

oooo

Saturday morning, Simon waited impatiently at the Sanctuary's transporter booth. Since they had no relay equipment of their own, it served only as a way station. Suddenly the lock light began to glow. Behind the transparent door, a swirl of sparkling energy coalesced into human form. His heart pounding, Simon opened the door and welcomed Dame into his arms. She glanced about nervously, and seeing that they were alone, settled into a long kiss of welcome.

Afterward, she said, "I couldn't keep away. I had to see you, even if…"

"I'm not reading your mind," he assured her. "My parents are only touch telepaths, and you can relax because they won't lay a hand on you. My brother Jamie looks Vulcan, but he has the mind of a human. And there aren't any Vulcans here in the retreat house this weekend."

"You work with Vulcans here?"

"Yes, I bunk upstairs. During retreats, I provide counseling and perform the occasional baptism or marriage. Meanwhile, Father's tutoring me on my final studies for the priesthood."

Dane gripped his hand tightly. "Where is he?"

"Right down the hall, in the office. Come on, he wants to meet you." Simon led her to the office door and knocked.

From inside, Father said, "Enter."

With his own share of apprehension, Simon ushered Dane into the room. Spock rose from his desk chair and looked at them. Sensing Dane's uneasiness, Simon slipped a comforting arm around the small of her back.

"Father," he said, "I'd like you to meet Dane Sutton of the Boston Philharmonic Orchestra. Dane, this is my father, Spock."

Father inclined his head. "Miss Sutton, you are most welcome."

"Hello, sir," she forced out.

Father said, "I hear that you are an accomplished vocalist, as well as a violinist."

Dane seemed to have lost her voice, so Simon said, "Father plays a couple of Vulcan string instruments, piano, and the flute. My mom played the flute, too."

Dane stirred. "The flute? I fiddled around with that in high school…" She gave a nervous laugh. "No pun intended."

"None taken," Father smoothly replied.

Dane cast Simon a bewildered glance.

"Vulcan humor," he explained. "Dry as dust. You'll get used to it."

They left the retreat house and stopped at the corral to look at the horses and burro in their scruffy winter coats. Then entering the cabin, they found T'Naisa on her hands and knees gathering raisins Tess had scattered in the midst of her play.

T'Naisa glanced up, and pushing at an unruly lock of red hair, smiled warmly. "So this is Dane!" she said, getting to her feet.

Simon introduced Dane to his stepmother, and could tell she was not as intimidated by this emotionally free halfling.

As T'Naisa took off after Tess, Dane leaned toward Simon and said low, "She's different!"

He quietly explained, "T'Naisa was raised human."

Outdoors, it began to snow. T'Naisa lent Dane some winter gear and Simon took her for a walk through the woods. They came to Plum Creek's own "Inspiration Point". The thick fall of snow obscured the mountains as it whispered into the meadows far below.

"Well," Simon said, "what do you think?"

Snowflakes clung to her lashes. With nose and cheeks rosy from the cold, she replied, "It's beautiful."

"I mean my father…and T'Naisa. Do they still scare you?"

He saw that she wanted to please him, but was too honest to lie. His heart ached with love for her. Grasping her mitten-covered hands, he gazed into her eyes and said, "There's nothing to be afraid of…you'll see. Oh, Dane." He could no longer restrain himself. "Dane, marry me."

She turned from him and gazed out over the point. The fact that she did not say "no" left Simon hopeful, but he knew that he had moved far too quickly. She would need time to sort through the strangeness of his family. From now on, he must take care not to pressure her.

At lunch, Jamie showed up, and Dane met the gangling teenage version of their father. He had brought along his Native American friend, Lame Wolf, whose long black hair hung below his shoulders. Jamie explained that Lame Wolf lived on the neighboring property with "Uncle" Jim Kirk, the former admiral and starship captain. He went on to say that their father had also commanded the Enterprise for a time.

Dane smiled politely and worked on her soup.

Simon said, "Okay, Jamie, that's enough. By now she probably thinks we're a bunch of bragging egotists."

T'Naisa asked Dane about her plans for the future.

Dane ducked her head and said, "Well, I'm happy with the Philharmonic…not first chair, but maybe, in time…"

Simon scarcely heard the rest of the conversation. Dane was happy in Boston. A musician with her talent could not be expected to leave it all behind for him. He wanted her to perform, yet he also wanted her at his side.

After the meal, Father brought out his flute and let Dane coax a halting melody from it. Her eyes lit when Simon brought in his violin, along with a second case containing an older, less valuable instrument. They played together, and at T'Naisa's request sang an a capella version of the hymn they had performed during their tour. When it was over, he met Dane's dancing eyes and shared her laughter while their little audience clapped in appreciation. In that shining moment, he foresaw a wondrous future in which anything seemed possible.

oooo

Spock sat studying the gleaming flute in his hands. The cabin was quiet. Simon and Dane were back outdoors with James and Lame Wolf. T'Naisa returned to the living area after putting Tess down for her nap, and settled beside him on the sofa.

"It is plain to see," Spock said. "He is deeply taken with her."

"She loves him, too. Did you notice how they looked at one another after the song?"

"Hmm."

The noncommittal sound made T'Naisa wonder. "What's the matter? Don't you approve of Dane?"

"She is a highly talented young woman pursuing a career on the other side of the continent."

T'Naisa sighed. "They'll sort it out."

"At the expense of the priesthood?"

"Spock, if he's meant to be a priest, it will happen."

She was right, of course, but Spock still found the situation troubling. Yanash had kept a guiding hand on Simon since he was twelve years old. Was Dane Sutton part of the Shiav's plan?

oooo

At the first opportunity, Simon visited Dane in Boston. Now that she had returned to the orchestra, her demanding schedule left little time for socialization. Simon's reputation as a musician and composer gained him access to a rehearsal, and afterward he joined Dane in a nearby café.

As they finished their meal, she invited him to the apartment she shared with her cat.

Simon gave a regretful smile. "My father would call that 'unseemly' for a candidate to the priesthood, and maybe he'd be right. Dane, I love you so much. I don't want to put either of us in the way of temptation."

"You sound like a priest already," she complained. "I just want to show you where I live. I'll keep to myself….I promise."

Dane broke her promise soon after they walked through the door, and Simon did little to discourage her. After weeks of phone conversations, it was a joy to kiss her and hold her close. He ached to deepen their relationship both mentally and physically, to make her his wife and share a home together. But all too soon, the time neared for her evening performance and his subsequent departure.

Standing with his arms around her, Simon said, "I don't want to leave you."

"Then why don't you move here?" she spoke softly into his ear. "You could easily find work as a musician...probably right in my orchestra. This morning the conductor asked about you. Think of it; we could play together every day."

Drawing back, he looked deeply into her eyes. "Would you marry me then?"

"In a second," she answered at once. With rising excitement, she rushed on. "You could move in here with me…a pair of musicians…Mr. and Mrs. however-you-pronounce-it."

"S'chn T'gai," he said with a deep chuckle. Leaning down, he kissed her beautiful, eager face and was sorely tempted. "But I can't, don't you see? I want to be a priest."

Tears welled in her blue eyes and spilled down her cheeks. "Simon, I'm not like you. I have to perform. I've spent my whole life getting to this point and I can't just throw it away now."

"I don't want you to," he assured her.

"But if you can't…and I can't…" Her voice choked.

Simon wiped at one of her tears with a finger. Reaffirming his vocation to the priesthood had left him strangely calm inside. He did not love Dane any less, but his mind was clear and focused.

"We'll find a way," he promised. "Better wash your face. You don't want to be late."

His tone seemed to reassure her. After one final kiss, she readied herself for the concert and they headed out the door.

oooo

Up to this point, Simon had said very little to Dane about the religious faith that was so important to his life. After he arrived home, he began sending her information about Yanash and the growing number of Vulcans who had turned from their Golist and Seleyan traditions to follow him. He sometimes included excerpts from scriptures.

Dane soon phoned him. "This Spock who wrote some of scriptures—he's your dad? He was with Yanash?"

"I thought you knew that," Simon replied to her screen image. "The press always plays up that angle. T'Naisa knew Yanash personally, too."

"I don't much follow the news," she admitted. "I didn't have any idea. They seem so…ordinary, living in that little cabin, picking up after a toddler. I mean…T'Naisa even cooks."

"She likes to cook. She doesn't much care for replicators, and my mother was the same way."

"I suppose, but…"

Simon smiled. "They may be famous, but they're just people…just family…and Yanash wants us to set an example of the new Vulcan family dynamic. It's okay to touch one another, to show love. It's okay to smile."

Dane frowned. "Your father barely smiles at all."

"He's old school. It's hard to change, but believe me, he's loosened up considerably from when I was little. And T'Naisa's been good for him."

"I like her," she said sincerely, "and little Tess is cute with those big brown eyes and that mop of auburn hair."

Thinking of Dane's parents lost in the earthquake, Simon nodded. "I would have liked to know your mom and dad."

"Now, they were really ordinary," she remarked fondly.

But to Simon, everything about Dane was so special, that he was quite sure her parents had been extraordinary, too.