A/N: Hope you like it!
Draco glanced down at the Muggle device as a notification popped up on the screen, the mixed ambiance of rain and crackling fire logs fading deep into the background of his private residence. He had only just figured out how to use the damned thing and it was already vibrating harder and louder than any device his ex-girlfriend, Pansy Parkinson, had ever used.
With a reluctant sigh, he lowered the volume on his television and grabbed his smartphone from the coffee table, holding it right up to his face and staring at the notification as if it had been sent to him in a foreign language.
Thank you for joining eMatchic! Your adventure awaits.
The bloke at the phone shop had insisted that Draco sign up for eMatchic. It was apparently all the rage amongst Muggle-borns and Half-bloods. Anyone who lived any semblance of a Muggle life, really. In all honesty, Draco had forgotten all about it. The entire concept was a little sterile for his personal tastes. He preferred meeting his partners the old fashioned way. But he had to admit, after having his wand taken away and his Healer license revoked, he had really, truly lost the will to show his face in public.
He barely remembered the last time he had gone on a date, let alone had sex.
On somewhat of a whim, he propped his legs up on the coffee table and leaned back comfortably, punching his passcode into the phone and tapping the eMatchic icon to see for himself what all the fuss was about.
The actions were simple enough. Swipe left if they're a minger and swipe right if they're not, as Phone Shop Bloke had so eloquently described. In most ways it was rather barbaric, but it wasn't much different than real life, he supposed. In the old days it was as simple as walking into a pub on a Friday night and chatting up the most beautiful witch there. At least on the app, there was the option of viewing ages and interests and political views.
To his surprise there were quite a few attractive witches floating about on the app. Most were either too young or too old and most appeared to be looking for something serious, but there was this one … a Muggle-born witch whose photo had made his heart skip the second he saw it. The only time in his life where he remembered having that kind of reaction was in his fourth year, the first time he had laid eyes on Fleur Delacour. Granted, this Muggle-born was nowhere near Delacour in terms of looks, but that wasn't the point.
He had seen her before.
In fact, he had seen her nearly everyday for the larger part of his adolescence.
Hermione Granger
Age: 28
Draco zoomed in on the photo as if to verify that it was really her. In it, she was seated outside of a café in Paris, breaking off a piece of a pastry while smiling for the photo. Judging by the angle, someone else had taken it. Weasley? Last he checked, they were still together. They could very well have broken up for all he knew, but there was a stronger chance that some random person was only pretending to be her.
He imagined the real Granger hadn't the time to go on dating apps and browse for hookups.
Isn't she too busy saving the world?
On yet another whim, he decided to do some investigative work. With a mouthful of firewhiskey burning the back of his throat, Draco swiped right on the obviously fake Hermione Granger, and then swiftly redirected his attention to the television, waiting all of thirty minutes before a second notification popped on his phone.
Congratulations! You have a new match on eMatchic.
Draco returned from the kitchen with his first refill of firewhiskey, having half expected his little investigation to have gone nowhere. Only mildly interested in seeing what the imposter had to say, he plopped down on his couch and lazily grabbed his phone, opening eMatchic to find that someone else had matched with him. An older witch from Belfast. Julie something or other.
Ignoring the twitch of disappointment in his stomach, he tossed his phone away and raised the volume on his television, trying his absolute best to pay attention to whatever the fuck was going on in Winterfell. He had to admit, the Muggle interpretation of fantasy worlds and magic, had always interested him to some degree. Although there were no Tyrion Lannister's or Ned Stark's in real life, there were more than a few Littlefinger's. Also, for some inexplicable reason, he had always felt a sense of familiarity when watching Joffrey's early scenes, though he couldn't for the life of him figure out how or why.
It was only as he fell deep into storyline, that his phone vibrated again.
Congratulations! You have a new match on eMatchic.
For a split second he considered ignoring it. There was a good chance it was just another random match, probably with that witch from London, the mental image of her long, flowing auburn hair tipping him so close to the edge of no return that he really had no choice but to check.
Immediately grabbing his phone, he opened the app for the third time, ready to send Rachel from London a line, only to feel his stomach lurch. Instead of long, flowing auburn hair, he found soft, curly chestnut hair, and instead of Rachel, he found Granger.
It's not her. It can't be her.
There was no conceivable way the real Granger would have swiped right on him. More than ever he felt this person was an imposter. They had to be. With another mouthful of firewhiskey, Draco leaned forward utterly focused and typed the first message he could think of.
From: Draco Malfoy
How many people do you fool on a daily basis?
Within thirty seconds, his phone vibrated in the palm of his hand, a response waiting for him.
From: Hermione Granger
I beg your pardon?
He resisted the urge to roll his eyes.
From: Draco Malfoy
I'm nowhere near drunk enough to play along. Do the right thing and delete the account. Posing as someone else will get you nowhere.
From: Hermione Granger
Funny that you of all people should mention doing the right thing.
Lifting an eyebrow at the sheer disrespect, Draco knocked back another mouthful of firewhiskey, typing the first thing he could of.
From: Draco Malfoy
I see you've been reading The Daily Prophet. Well done! Ten points to Gryffindor … or whatever Hogwarts House the real you was sorted into.
There was something about the tone of their messages which screamed Slytherin, but they could just as easily have been a Ravenclaw with no social skills.
From: Hermione Granger
Ah, yes. News of your malpractice has made the front page for two straight weeks. Finally you're getting the attention you've always wanted. At the expense of your Healer license, but still. Go you.
This time he actually did roll his eyes.
From: Draco Malfoy
Who are you to judge? If you're going to pretend to be someone else on a dating app, aim lower.
From: Hermione Granger
What is that supposed to mean?
Finishing off the rest of his drink, Draco leaned back, stretching the kinks out of his neck.
From: Draco Malfoy
Well, for one, I'm quite sure she's still in a relationship with Ron Weasley. If you want to really fool people, you should have gone with someone else, like Luna Lovegood or Ginny Weasley. They're known and attractive enough to get you the attention you're looking for, but they're nowhere near Granger level.
Before he had so much as set his phone down, he felt it vibrate.
From: Hermione Granger
That sounds dangerously close to a compliment.
His lips hovered on the edge of a smirk.
From: Draco Malfoy
I may be judgmental but I'm not blind.
From: Hermione Granger
I suppose that's your backwards way of saying she's pretty.
From: Draco Malfoy
She's not completely undesirable.
From: Hermione Granger
Somehow, I had always sensed that you were secretly attracted to her.
His eyebrows bounced up.
From: Draco Malfoy
Ah, so you know her? That adds a whole new layer to this investigation.
From: Hermione Granger
As a matter of fact I know her quite well.
From: Draco Malfoy
Well enough that you would pretend to be her on a dating app while she's still in a relationship?
From: Hermione Granger
She and Ron aren't together anymore.
From: Draco Malfoy
I'm going to need proof.
From: Hermione Granger
It's all over The Daily Prophet. He's dating Tracey Davis now. One of your friends, I believe?
With a curious twitch in his gut, Draco grabbed the latest copy of The Daily Prophet, shocked to find that the imposter was right. Weasley was dating Tracey. Not only dating, but engaged to marry.
From: Draco Malfoy
Odd that he would get engaged so quickly after a breakup.
From: Hermione Granger
I don't disagree.
From: Draco Malfoy
You don't think Granger's going through enough? Why pretend to be her on top of everything?
From: Hermione Granger
Careful now. If I didn't know any better, I'd fool myself into thinking you might actually care.
From: Draco Malfoy
What makes you think I don't?
From: Hermione Granger
You're a Malfoy.
Cracking his first smile in weeks, he lifted his legs onto the couch, spreading across.
From: Draco Malfoy
Fair enough. So besides the malpractice and my being an overall asshole, what else do you know about me?
From: Hermione Granger
I know that you were once in a very tumultuous relationship with Pansy Parkinson, I know that another imposter once transfigured you into a ferret in your fourth year of school, and I know that you smuggled those ingredients into the country in order to brew a very specific potion. A potion that heals all wounds, all scars and all markings that are better left unseen.
His smile quickly faded.
From: Draco Malfoy
Careful now. If I didn't know any better, I'd fool myself into thinking you actually are Hermione Granger.
From: Hermione Granger
What if I am?
From: Draco Malfoy
I would first ask why you swiped right on me.
From: Hermione Granger
And I would say that I swiped right because I was curious … in a few different ways.
Something in his chest gently twisted.
From: Draco Malfoy
Like?
From: Hermione Granger
Well, it's not everyday you find purebloods on eMatchic. That, and I was curious to see if you had swiped right on me, which you had, but only because you think I'm an imposter.
From: Draco Malfoy
Aren't you?
From: Hermione Granger
That depends.
From: Draco Malfoy
On?
From: Hermione Granger
Would you have swiped right otherwise?
He thought about it for a long moment, the answer creeping its way through his subconscious.
On the one hand, he had neither seen nor spoken to Granger since they were in school, and there was still a good chance he was talking to an imposter. But on the other hand … he felt good. Not just because of the firewhiskey. He felt truly good. And the more thought about it, the less he wanted to know.
When had knowing ever done anyone any good?
From: Draco Malfoy
Regardless of who you are, this is the most I've talked to anyone in weeks.
From: Hermione Granger
We probably shouldn't ruin it, then.
From: Draco Malfoy
Probably.
A/N: What do you think so far?