Title: If I Told You It Was More Than Love

Pairing: Viktuuri, Otayuri

Summary: All his life, Yuuri was never given a choice by the Nikiforov family or the world.

Note: Lol. I'm sorry for the late update. I will say it now, I am a Senior in Uni and has a thesis in her hands. So update will be random. Because my life has no pattern now, only scribbles because Uni is hell. And I lack sleep.

Also, Viktor is two years older than Yuuri here.

ooo

At nine, Yuuri's freedom was controlled. It wasn't noticeable at first. As a kid, being told to do something is quite normal. Although, in retrospect, he should have known that doing chores is very much different from what people are asking from him.

It started simply when his room isn't in the same vicinity of his parents anymore.

"Moving? Why?" He asked while his mother packed his things and the maids moved them to a room far from where they are. His mother only smiled at him gently, comfortingly, a foreboding curve that entails so much more, "Sir Ivan requested of it. Only the best for you, darling."

"He is so kind, isn't he?" His father chimed, ruffling his hair. Yuuri only got to nod, not knowing what to say. If the master of the house demands of it, why should he oppose? It would only hurt his parents if he did, right?

Moving to a room just across Viktor's was not a thought-provoking one. His mother already explained that it was Viktor's father who wished of it. He did not think of it farther. Anyhow, it made Viktor extremely happy. If Viktor is happy, he would not see him angry. If he was not angry, then he would not be scared of him.

Scary Viktor isn't someone he would want to see again. Anyway, who was even afraid of their own friend? He felt bad being scared of Viktor.

The second subtle change to his freedom was his lack of privacy. Not that he noticed it much. Since befriending Viktor, he was kind of always there with him and Yuuri doesn't think of it as breaching, more like having a company to avoid loneliness, more like little children clinging to one another in a world full of adult.

Viktor did like sleeping with him in the same bed. It wasn't a surprise that since he moved across the hall, Viktor would find every chance and make every excuse just to be with him.

"I've got a nightmare, Yuuri." He would say most days because Viktor is the kind of boy who would actually had nightmares of abandonment, "I dreamt that you disappear. I would die if you did."

He was the kind of boy who means what he says. It terrifies Yuuri sometimes how much Viktor would easily say things that means so much in context. It terrifies Yuuri sometimes that Viktor and everyone else in the world think of him as Viktor's only friend—like if he did disappear, if he did leave, Viktor would die and it would be all his fault.

So, every night when Viktor got nightmares and he looks honestly scared and lost, Yuuri would open his door and drag him to his bed, hug him tightly until Viktor's breathing evens and he has the slightest of smile on his face.

Yuuri doesn't think of it much when the night comes and he doesn't sleep without Viktor or in the morning when he lives it with Viktor. The permanent figure of the Alpha in his life is the one thing that fooled him into thinking it was alright to lose sight of what little privacy he has.

The third subtle thing was the one thing he sometimes notices but never gives much thought on it. He doesn't have any friends from his grade nor from any other levels except the ones Viktor introduced him to.

Yuuri knew the extent of the relationship of Viktor with the other kids. Viktor doesn't see them as more than the children of the business partners of his parents. If Yuuri doesn't know Viktor personally, he would have been misled into thinking that Viktor is actually friends with them.

When in reality, he was Viktor's only friend. Viktor always loves reminding him that on days he seems extra bothered by Chris' friendly attitude towards him, or Georgi's gentlemanly ways, or Mila's teasing persona.

The three are the only ones he can interact to. Not that he has much of a choice—the other kids avoid him like a plague. But when it gets to him—like really gets to him—he would say something to Viktor about the avoidance of the other kids because sometimes it would be nice too to be look at by others like he did not steal someone precious from them.

"Don't cry, Yuuri." Viktor would whisper, wiping his sad tears away, "You don't need them anyway. You are much better compared to them. That is why they avoid you. They don't want to be deemed garbage standing next to you. Forget about them. All you have to think about is me. The only one that really matter here is us—just the two of us."

Comforts like this from Viktor are draining. It made Yuuri really think hard and made him agree somewhat to Viktor's words. If the other kids don't like him, that's fine. Viktor is there with him anyway. And Viktor is the only one to show such raw happiness just being with him. Viktor is his only friend.

It warmed his heart. In all the wrong kind of ways. But he doesn't know that. He'll never know that.

Because, somehow, Viktor gets to him—like really gets to him—more than he was willing to admit.

ooo

"He looks so grumpy." Viktor commented as he sat on his throne, the big red cushioned chair in his room, as he observes Yuuri and his little brother interact. Yuuri threw him a smile as he rocks little Yuri in his arms, "He looks angelic."

"More angelic than me?" Viktor asked with a downward dip of his lips. Yuuri chuckled, "He's a baby, Vitya. He looks like a cherub."

"What about me then?"

Yuuri coos at Yuri who squirmed in his hold, trying to get away from the older Omega. Yuuri set down Yuri and looks at Viktor again, "You look like a king, Vitya. Fit to rule the whole world."

Viktor's smile is pleased and beautiful, assuring Yuuri that he said the right things, "Would you be my queen if I were the king?"

"If you would allow." Yuuri said, scratching the back of his neck, feeling embarrassed at the prospect of being queen next to a king like Viktor. Rulers like Viktor deserve beautiful queens that look like an angel. He quickly turn at little Yuri who was gibbering away at a stuffed cat.

Queens as beautiful as Yuri is.

"That's out of the question, Yuuri." Viktor tuts, smiling widely at him, the heart-shaped kind that could melt hearts, "You would be my queen whether or not people would allow it."

"That's…" Yuuri trailed off, not knowing what to follow after. Viktor looked so peaceful, so calm, so confident, like a knife just sitting on a table.

"I love you, after all." Viktor said, still smiling. Yuuri forgets all about his metaphor, smiling warmly at Viktor, "I love you too, Vitya."

Love. That thing shouldn't be thrown so carelessly around. But how would Yuuri know? He was a child who doesn't know any better.

He wasn't sly like Viktor.

ooo

Viktor has a funny way of making his mark. Yuuri would not get it but Viktor is imprinting him in the cruelest of ways. It was brainwashing at most, if people would know what he whisper to Yuuri at night. It was a type of conditioning that make Yuuri want and need Viktor's presence in the vicinity.

It was basic knowledge used all too cleverly by an Alpha child.

Viktor would spend all his hours with Yuuri—talk to him about things that are darker in thoughts, sweeter in the reflection of actions, like a cool ice on melting lava.

And then he would disappear. Without a word. Without warning.

On nights Viktor would not come in his room, Yuuri would be restless and he wouldn't get any sleep. And he would only ever calm down when he finds himself in front of Viktor's room, knocking and entering, and tucking himself next to the still body of the Alpha.

He doesn't see Viktor's smile because he was tired and ready to let slumber consume him. But Viktor would turn around, spoon him, and that's all it takes to make him dream.

Viktor is cruel like that.

And Yuuri?

Yuuri is just too damn… gullible.

ooo

The first time it happened, it was right after Yuuri's birthday.

They spent the whole day together—like they usually do in the normal, occasion-less days. Viktor has just learnt the concept of imprinting the other day. And though his fellow Alphas all cringed at the idea of getting cooties from Omegas, he was fascinated at the thought that maybe, just maybe, there is a biological way to make Yuuri want him too—need him as much as he needed him.

His teacher said that there had been cases of accidental imprinting. Many childhood pair of friends of Alpha and Omega were so close to each other that they ended up putting imprint on each other that only mated pair should have. Half of the cases were stop through distancing—years apart before they were allowed to meet again to fully shake the imprint and return their biological makeup to normal, non-independent to the other.

Half were force to marry each other because it physically and psychologically pains them to be apart. Omegas are especially weak to the sudden imbalance of their makeup, often getting nightmares, anxiety attacks—and to worst cases, coughing blood violently unless the Alpha is near them. Ages from 7-10 were the ones that should be taken extra care of since their body wasn't meant for imprinting yet.

Viktor beamed at the idea. Actually preened at the lesson, too pleased to notice anything else. He couldn't wait to test this so called imprinting theory.

So on Yuuri's birthday, he smoldered the Omega with lots of affections—gave him his undivided attention, played with him until they were so exhausted that they fell asleep under their favorite tree—and if only he could at that young age, he would have given Yuuri the world. Anything Yuuri want. Anything Yuuri need. He would offer.

Viktor has a hard time separating himself from Yuuri. He knew he was imprinted. Imprinting is a gradual process between an Alpha and an Omega that took place when the two are always together, making as much skin contact until they were able to complete a scenting process and the biological makeup deemed the other as their mate and become dependent on the other for the same warmth, presence, and scent.

Yuuri had imprinted him for a long time now. And he wonders if Yuuri is the same. His teacher said there can be one-sided imprinting. And he desperately hopes that it wasn't the case.

So while Yuuri sleeps under the shade, Viktor disappears. Hours later, Yuuri woke up to a cold empty space, an ache in his chest, and an uncomfortable ballooning feeling in his stomach—as if he's ready to explode.

"Vitya?" He calls but no one answers him. The balloon in his stomach grew to his chest and he finds breathing difficult. There was never a moment anymore that he wakes up alone. And it is a scary thing. A terrible thing. To suddenly feel empty spaces beside you, what a horrible thing to experience.

He doesn't see Viktor for a few days.

And for the first three days, he was doing fine—the ache in his chest can be ignored with chores and homework and by little Yuri who wouldn't let go of him once he saw him.

The fourth day was unkind. The small ache in his chest began to fester, affecting his thought process. He would suddenly smell Viktor but whenever he turns around, he was not there. Sometimes, he deludes himself into thinking that Viktor is with him and he would call his name and talk before stopping because the Alpha was not there.

The fifth day was cruel. He lost appetite after being turn away by the maid when he tries to enter Viktor's room, only to be told that Viktor doesn't want any visitor.

On the sixth day, he doesn't eat. He doesn't get out of bed. He felt weak. Breathing is harder. He hears Viktor's voice just outside his room, talking so happily and he wanted to crawl out of bed and be near Viktor, be by Viktor's side.

On the seventh day, the dark thoughts get to him. Viktor was the only other Alpha he interacts regularly and the rejection of Viktor, refusing to see him, send his mind reeling down until his spirit is on the ground, extracting early signs of anxiety.

He doesn't want you anymore.

You're useless.

You don't deserve someone as great as Viktor.

Viktor doesn't love you.

The unkind words his mind feeds him make him grip his hair tightly, wanting to make them stop. What if it's the truth? He learnt that certain Alphas avoid certain Omegas because they physically can't stand them—smell, appearance, everything about Omegas they don't like would send them running away. What if Viktor doesn't like him and can't stand his presence? Was he annoying? Clingy? Too anxious?

Yuuri gets the little energy he has and weakly walked across the hall, knocking on Viktor's door and calling. He needs to see his Alpha.

"Vitya?" He calls and then calls again but the same silence met him. The first tear slid down his cheek and he couldn't breathe—like his chest is rejecting the air—body aching, searching. The pain doesn't stop until he drags himself to his bedroom and sleep. And even then the uncomfortableness of being alone made him restless. The thoughts weren't kind either—they continue to plague his mind until he was physically doubling, aching and hurting, searching for a familiar warmth, for a calming scent.

He doesn't see Viktor until ten days later.

And when he did, he doesn't let Viktor's hand go for the same amount of days the Russian Alpha vanished.

Viktor preened at the result.

ooo

Chris was Viktor's oldest acquaintance. Even older than his cousin Georgi. He knew him since he was five. The Giacometti family was what Viktor can only define as friendly—honest to God just friendly, no ulterior motives attach. It was a refreshing sight from someone who got kidnapped more often than he could count in his little hands.

The kidnappings eventually stop when he was six. He doesn't know what happened back then but ever since the Giacometti got involved, everything was peaceful again in his life.

It was only natural for him to feel like he needed to acquaint with people who can give him peace. Chris was a cheerful person—still is. But there is an awestruck look in his eyes that made Viktor uncomfortable. He had seen it before.

He wouldn't like to get to know someone who looks like he was ready to worship the ground he walks on.

So Chris was Viktor's oldest acquaintance because he doesn't pass to being a friend. And even when the awestruck faded from Chris' eyes, replaced by the friendliness he associates with the Giacometti, Chris doesn't evolve from being an acquaintance to a friend.

And nobody did.

Of course, until the Katsuki came to his life and drag a Katsuki Yuuri with them.

ooo

Yuri is two years old and he knows his big brother doesn't like him. He doesn't understand at first. And whenever he asks Yuuri, the other would simply furrow his brow, chuckle at the silliness of his question, "Vitya doesn't dislike you, Yuratchka. You're his only little brother. He loves you very much."

He almost thinks so too. Yuuri's voice is so soothing, so truthful that it makes him want to believe whatever he says.

But then he would ask Viktor, "Do you love me, big brother?"

And the answer's always the same, "Not as much as Yuuri."

ooo

He was ten when the inevitable happened.

"Yura, come here, don't go crawling under the slides, you'll get very dirty." Yuuri chided, taking the smaller Omega under the slides. Viktor has not been present lately. Ever since he stepped unto middle school, Viktor has been very busy with things Yuuri can't wrap his head around. But he never fails to sleep in his room, the only other time he can see the Alpha nowadays.

Yuri struggles in his hold, trying to break free, "Let me go, stupid."

"That's bad, Yura." Yuuri sighed, embracing the toddler even more, only letting go when the Omega bit the skin of his arm. Yuuri yowled at the searing pain, jolting the younger child.

"Yura, that hurt." Yuuri softly scolded, voice softening even more at the guilty expression of the younger Yuri. Yuri took the bitten arm and placing a kiss on it, the way Yuuri would do with him whenever he gets a scratch from running around—the pain doesn't go away but it was miraculously lessened like the kiss was magical itself.

When they both settle down from playing, Yuri looks at the older Omega seriously. Yuuri gives him a curious stare, "Yes, Yura?"

"Are you going to marry my brother?" Yuri finally asks because whenever Viktor felt like reading to him, Viktor would tell him his future plans with Yuuri after every fantasy book he read. He probably lost count of the multiple wedding plans Viktor gushes to him or the different names he would like his pups to have. Viktor thinks he doesn't understand them but Yuri was still a Nikiforov even if he was an Omega, and Nikiforovs are smart in nature.

Yuuri is startled by the thought. He never once thinks of it, deeming it a matter too mature for his age. But if he was being honest to the question, he would like to marry Viktor someday.

"I don't know…" He said instead, biting his bottom lip, "If… if Vitya would like to marry me, then I would marry him. People often said that Vitya was the ideal Alpha. And… and sometimes, my mother and all the other maids would tease me that I would be Vitya's bride someday that's why I should learn all the ethics and manners of being a perfect Omega."

Viktor did say that he was the only Alpha who would see something in him. And Yuuri believes him. Who would see him as anything more than ordinary? Viktor would.

He says he was beautiful even if Yuuri believes he was not. It would be nice if Viktor would think of him as beautiful for the rest of their lives. It's nice hearing it from Viktor—he sounds adamant about it.

"But would you like to marry him?" Yuri asks again because it seems like Yuuri would only marry Viktor if he was ask, like his only option was to say yes, like he was programmed into pleasing his brother by the world.

Yuuri hesitates for a moment before nodding, "I would. He is the only Alpha who would be able to appreciate someone as ordinary as me. And it would be an honor. The other Omegas in my class would swoon whenever they see Viktor and tells me that I am lucky to have him. So I definitely would."

"If some other Alpha would like to marry you, would you?" Yuri further questioned and Yuuri tilts his head, looking lost, as if it was absurd that another Alpha would like him enough to marry him.

"Oh no," Yuuri shook his head, hands clasping tight on the railings of the swing, "I would not. Viktor would be angry."

"Stupid." It was the only thing he could say to the older Omega because Yuri thinks it was a hopeless case and he wished he was an Alpha instead because maybe Yuuri would have been given a much wider choice than only Viktor.

"I want to go home." Yuri muttered, opening his arms for Yuuri to pick him up. Yuuri smiled at him, kissing his temple, "Yes, yes. It would be wise too. Your parents would be coming home and they would be hosting a party too. Do you know why, Yura?"

Yuri shook his head, ears pressed on Yuuri's chest, the heartbeat of the older Omega lulling him to sleep. Yuuri hummed, "I wonder what it was for."

Their trek home was short, the playground being in the large estate of the Nikiforovs. They were greeted by fussy maids and butlers who ushered them in, telling Yuuri to get himself ready for the party as they took the sleeping toddler from him.

"Do you know what the party is for, Toris-san?" Yuuri asked the Beta who looks at him with a confused expression, "Master Viktor didn't tell you?"

"Vitya seemed so busy lately. Was it because of the party?"

Toris nodded, "He worked hard putting this together. This has been a tradition in the Nikiforov."

"A tradition? Of having a party?"

"Not just a party. A very, very important party." Toris smiled at Yuuri, "Aren't you excited for it?"

Before Yuuri could reply, Viktor was suddenly bounding towards him, taking his hand in his and kissing his cheek, "Yuuri! I miss you so much. Why aren't you dress yet? The party is going to start soon."

"Umm… I was playing with Yura. I'm sorry I'm not dressed yet. I'll be going to my room to get ready." Yuuri uttered, Viktor nodded his head, "You should hurry then. I already chose a pair for you so we could match."

Viktor left him as soon as he entered his bedroom, promising him to see him later in the party. Yuuri wore the suit Viktor picked and quickly headed to the already bustling party.

When he entered the ball room, half the crowd fell silent while the other half buzzes with words, all staring at him. He felt like crawling away, face reddening, unease settling in his stomach.

Was he ruining the party?

"Yuuri!" Viktor hurried to him, taking his hand once more, "Let's go to my parents. Your parents are also at the front. They're going to announce something. Aren't you excited?"

People keep asking him that. Why would he be excited? Was there something he does not know?

"Ah, it's been a long time Yuuri." Ivan ruffles his hair and he smiled up at him, Katyusha put down Yuri, who immediately went over to Yuuri, and kissed his temple as a greeting.

The people watched the interaction between the two families.

Ivan stood up from his seat as Yuuri and Viktor settled in their chairs, Yuri sitting on Yuuri's lap, refusing to leave. Ivan brought his flute up, tapping it lightly, commanding the entire room into silence.

"Thank you all for coming to this very important event that my son, Viktor," At his name, he stood up and bowed at the crowd before settling back down, a large smile in his face, "had prepared. As you all know, it has been a tradition in our family that an Alpha would threw a party to present their chosen Omega before the rest of the family and close friends. Viktor?"

Ivan set the eyes and ears of the audience to Viktor who regally stood up again, "I know that this is too early for me to be choosing an Omega mate."

Omega mate? Yuuri looked to Viktor who looked back at him, smilingly.

"But I am sure you know how much I love him. That's why I'm going to announce it earlier than planned. I am sure you understand the depth of my love for him." Viktor said, ushering Yuuri to stand up as well, confusing Yuuri even more, but, whilst Yuri was still in his arms, he stood up, not knowing what else to do. Yuri buried his face in the crook of Yuuri's neck, tightly closing his eyes.

"I present you my Omega mate, Katsuki Yuuri."

What? Yuuri turned to Viktor who was basking in the enthusiasm of the crowd.

"Wa-wait." He said, "What do you mean, Vitya?"

"Yuuri." His mother smiled at him brightly, with a hint of uncertainty but at the young age, Yuuri never saw the hesitation, just the brightness of Hiroko's smile, "From now on, you're going to be Viktor's fiancé. Isn't that exciting?"

"What's a fiancé, Mommy?" He asked confusedly.

"It means that someday you and Viktor would be like Mommy and Daddy."

"Like you and Daddy?"

"It means you and I are getting married someday, Yuuri. Aren't you happy?"

"Married?"

"Hmm!" Viktor hummed sagely, "When two persons loves each other, they would get married someday and build their own family. You love me, right, Yuuri?"

Yuuri swallowed. He doesn't understand. Not any of the things that are happening right now. But Viktor looks so happy. And everyone too. They look ecstatic. And they're expecting him to answer positively.

And if Viktor ask him to marry him, Yuuri would, right?

Yuuri swallowed before answering.

"I… I do. Of course, I do." It was the right answer it seems because Viktor threw himself at him and his parents were smiling so widely and Viktor's parents look pleased and the other people in the house look like it was the best news they heard.

Should ten years olds know what love means? He doesn't know. But it seems like love makes everyone happy when you say the right answer.

TBC…

Well, I tried. XD. Alright, review, guys!

Sorry for the grammar error. :3