Sum; Piper didn't leave when Alex's mom died she left after. Farhi being secretly in love with Alex sends someone to kill Piper for leaving Alex but the man Fahri sent after Pier does something much worse. Years later Piper is taken to Lichfield on an entirely separate charge and meets up with Alex. However what is Piper in for? What did Fahri do to her? Did Alex know? Most importantly will how will they react to seeing each other, can there be a relationship or is there to much damage?

*pov may change or maynot, italics are flashbacks and dreams, if you can't handle angst than keep reading because I will make you love it plus happy ending (I think Maybe. I'm a sap so probably :p), the only warning I can give you without spoiling the story is drug use.* Good luck (Updated with grammar corrections.)

I am not in light or in darkness. I am drifting through a void, a void of nothingness. It was all empty. I know this feeling I say out loud but my voice doesn't carry out into the void. As I continue to drift I become more and more aware. Aware of the beeping, aware of the wetness, aware of the sobs that weren't my own. I did it again is all I can think as I open my eyes to the blinding hospital lights. Looking to my left I see the source of the beeping , a heart monitor. Turning to my right I see the wetness on my arm and look up to find oceans moving my friends eyes.

"I did it again." This time I spoke aloud only to wince at the sound of my own voice. I must have been out for at least a month. Suddenly a sharp pain throbs in my cheek.

"Yeah Piper you fucking did and this time I am not letting it go. You are going to tell what the fuck Super Cunt did before I let you sleep, eat, get pain killers, see a doctor, or even speak to your brother." Polly said as she clutched my arms. When I remained silent she spoke again. "Please Piper I am your best friend and I love you. Please don't shut me out I want to help. Am I not good enough?"

That broke me, seeing her cry and doubt herself as my friend. I loved Polly and I wanted to tell her but I was scared of how she would look at me. She would have pity in her eyes and she would cry. Sometimes when I get really down I even start to think she would think less of me.

"I'm scared." I say in a voice that was more childlike and honest than I expected.

"Oh sweetie it's ok to be scared but just know nothing you do or say will make me ever stop being your friend. I mean you run off with some drug mafia super cunt and I still love you. You have also overdosed on heroine twice now and I still love you so you're stuck with me. So please let me help you before it's too late. The hospital called the police Pipes and it doesn't sound like you're gonna get off this time." Polly was still crying and It didn't look like the flow of tears was going to stop anytime soon. Especially after I tell her why I have become so broken and lost. The possibility of prison time doesn't scared me just like the thought of dying of an overdose doesn't bother me. Alex chose drugs over me, Larry told me I wasn't worth the trouble, my father can't look me in the eye after he found out I had a four year long relationship with a woman, and through all of this my mother still cared more about her reputation than me. I wasn't worth loving. But Polly stuck by my side through the drinking and the drugs. A part of me wished she was my lover instead of Alex because if she was I would never be suffering like this. I knew I had to tell Polly the whole truth but that didn't mean I was looking forward to it.

"It wasn't just the fact that she focused more on the business more than on me. It was the fact that she blamed me for not wanting to help her. I didn't want to help her do the illegal shit so when things went wrong she claimed I didn't care and that I wasn't being supportive. I wanted her to stop but every time I suggested it she brushed me off. I loved her Polly and that's the truth. Before her I was shy and not at all sexual but she made me feel things I never felt before. Romantic love, lust, and a whole new level of happiness. It wasn't just about the sex it was about how she made me feel." I paused and looked up at the white ceiling remembering our mixing breath and entangled hands. I sighed before continuing. "It was about how she made love to me. Eventually I couldn't take it any more so I told her I was leaving. She hid my passport." I chuckled at that. I wasn't laughing at the time but now I thought it was adorable because it showed how much she didn't want me to go. "Her mom died Polly. I couldn't leave her when her mom had just died. Her mom was the only person she ever had. Even if Alex and I didn't have a relationship anymore I owed it to her mom to attend the funeral. Her mom and I had a good relationship. When ALex was too busy to talk to us or when I just wanted advise I called Alex's mom, not my mom and not my dad who I was lying to. We would talk about embarrassing things Alex had done as a child or adult. So I went to the funeral not just for Alex but for her mom as well. I even said a few words about what a kind and loving woman she was and how much she cared about her daughter."

I was silent for a while trying not to let my emotions overwhelm me but it was too late. For the past four years I have used heroin to cope with moments like these where the emotions were just too much to handle. However I had a feeling it would take me more than the usual two days to get another hit. Polly said nothing but stroked my hand reassuringly. So I continued and told her about that dark night.

We walked in silence as our heels clacked and clicked. Eventually though I knew I couldn't wait any longer for the longer I waited the more my courage waned. So I stopped and said

"Alex I came to funeral because I owe it to both you and your mom to attend. However I am still leaving-" Before I could finish she looked at me in disbelief.

"REALLY PIPER? My mom just died and you want to leave now?" She screamed at me her face covered in tears and her arms stretched out to the side.

"You didn't let me finish." I said with a tense anger seeping into my tone. She crossed her arms and stood there. "I am leaving but I want you to come with me." I smile a little at the irony of those words. She said them to me once. It's how this whole journey around the world began.

"What are you saying Pipes?" She sniffled but her voice no longer held its earlier frustration.

"To put it bluntly Alex I am asking you to leave the business and live a life with me in New york. I am still running the company with Polly and my dad can find you a job you like in no time. We can move into my studio apartment and don't worry we won't be living off my parents. It's not Paris or Africa but it is pretty comfortable living. We would never be in need of money and we could live our-" I am cut off by her laughing.

"You have got to be kidding me? Of course you're not. Pipes look this is my life and I like it. I'm not just gonna drop everything and leave for you. You knew what I did for a living when you met me-"

"Yeah and when I met you you also said nothing would fucking go wrong. You said I was just there to keep you company and that I wouldn't HAVE TO DO ANYTHING IN YOUR BUSINESS." I couldn't contain my anger. She was telling me I wasn't worth it, she was basically refusing to do for me what I did for her which was dropping everything in my life and leaving it for her, she was telling me I wasn't worth it and that hurt me so much I could physically feel my heart breaking. She must have seen the hurt in my eyes more than the anger because she immediately tried to fix her mistake.

"Look Piper I can't jus-"

"NO." I said cutting her off "I don't want to hear it." I said tears dripping down to the concrete on which I stood. "This is it Alex. Me" I took a pause to get a grip on my emotions. "Or the business" A part of me knew the answer, a part of me hoped she picked me, and a part of me had already died knowing that she wouldn't pick me.

"I can't leave Piper." Was all she said and I just stood there for a moment looking at the woman who held my heart and just shattered it to pieces. I looked at her midnight black hair that I raked my fingers through and her smooth pale skin that I had mapped out in my head until finally my eyes landed on her grey eyes that once again began to fill with tears. Her mouth moved to speak but I spoke before she could.

"So the business. Goodbye Alex." I said basically running past her.

"No! Piper wait." I heard behind me and once again I was divided a part of me wanted her to run after me, another part knew she wouldn't and the last part just wanted to go back and make the heartbreak end. Before Alex Pearl Vause I had never known true love, lust, and passion and before Alex Pearl Vause .never. Know. true heartbreak and pain. I so desperately hoped this was one of these things that feel like hell when you're going through it but looking back you realize it wasn't that big a deal because at that moment I felt like my life was over. I felt like from that point forward I would never love someone the way I loved her. At that moment I questioned how I was supposed to move on with my life. I had money, both my parents were alive, I had a business I ran with my best friend who would die for me yet all I could think was 'how am I supposed to move on without her'.

I ran and ran and I would have ran to the airport if not for the fact that it was surrounded by highway and you needed a taxi to take you there. So I stood at the corner of some street and called a taxi only to see a miss call from my dad and a million text from Alex. I didn't call my dad back and I didn't even look at Alex's text messages. I called a cab and gave the best instructions I could based on street signs. The cabby seemed to know where I was so I hung up and waited there in the cold. I had my jacket on top of my luggage but didn't bother to put it on. The cold air surrounding me was the only thing keeping my thoughts from wandering to her. I laughed a dark sad laugh at the fact that I already couldn't say her name without a stab of pain emitting from my chest.

"Are you Piper Chapman?" A man's voice came from behind me scaring me so much I jumped into the street.

"Yes." I said as I turned to see who it was. As soon as I saw them I knew I should have lied. Two men dressed in all black stared back at me and I immediately turned to run only to be grabbed and dragged into a dark store. My mind was racing a mile a minute wondering who they were what they wanted how to get away? How big were they? Could I fight them? I had no money to give them and was terrified for my life.

Years later I would think back to those moments when I was worried about my life and think 'I wish all they had done was kill me' because what they had in store for me was worse than death. I was thrown to the ground and I immediately tried to run away only to be kick in my side and behind. One of the guys stepped on my butt while the other came and grabbed me by the neck. I was forced to look at him.

"It's nothing personal we are just doing our job. Awe don't cry." He said stroking my face. I didn't even realize I was crying because of how scared I was. The man behind me laughed.

"You are rougher on them than I am yet you always pretend to be the good cop. Telling them if they comply they get set free. You are sick man." He had an accent but I couldn't place it. His words sent a chill down my spine. At this point it should have become clear what they were going to do to me but I think I was in denial. That ignorance didn't last long as he took off the skirt I wore to the funeral with ease. I kicked him but he grabbed me by the ankle and spread my legs apart before landing a hard kick to my exposed private. It was at this point that I began to struggle and kick with tears covering the floor. They knew what they were doing and during the whole ordeal it became undeniably clear that they had done this many times before. They had me faced downward to using my arms to fight was hard, they had my ankles so I couldn't crawl away. Terrified sobs left my mouth and soon I was screaming for help only to be kicked in the face. No time was wasted in removing my underwear and ripping open my blouse. One man held me down while the other stripped naked.

"This one is prettier than the last, isn't she?" Asked the white man with the ascent.

"Yes but I bet she will be easier to break than the last." I don't know why but the spanish man's taunting words angered me. I scratched his face and moved to get up. I almost made it but once again a foot made contact with my stomach causing this unbearable pain to spread. The man with the ascent continued to beat me while the other man stripped. The man stopped beating me and sat behind me groping my beast and stroking his way down between my legs. I had never been a sexual person not before Alex but I had my fair share of rough college boys. However there is a hug difference between rough sex and being raped by sadists. The spanish man chuckled and began to lick my exposed breasts trying to turn away was futile as the white man sat behind me restraining my arms in a painful hold.

"Hurry up and break her so I can have my fun." As the white man spoke I could feel his disgusting penis rise and press against my back. I managed to kick the spanish man in the side but it did nothing but anger him. The man behind me tightened his grip and I could feel the pain in my shoulders while the spanish man shoved two fingers into my mouth gagging me. Removing them before I bite him he moved his fingers in alignment with my anus and smirked. I began shaking my head before I started to beg.

" PLEASE NO!" I sobbed out but my cries fell on deaf ears as he plunged his fingers into me. He began to brutalize me and his friend just laughed and asked him to hurry. The spanish man took out his fingers and shoved them back into my mouth before he shoved his penis into my vagina and began to rape me. It wasn't about him feeling good,no, it was about degrading me and humiliating me and making me hurt. He thrust as if his goal was to break every bone in my body. I lost track of time but to me it felt like hours even now I couldn't tell how long it was until his released inside of me. He pulled out and continues to cum on my body.

"Look at that she's a bleeder." The white man said but I didn't move I had stopped fighting. I was in so much pain and there was no way I was getting out of this. All I hoped was that my family and friends got to bury me. The spanish man took his fingers out of my mouth and kissed me. I rather him have left his fingers in my mouth even if they had been in my anus. Once again his taunted me and made me feel worthless. His tongue slithered down my throat and his hands abused my breast. He stood and stepped on them when the white man moved to take his turn. The white man was more interested in using me like a rag doll for his own pleasure. He turned me to lay face down before pulling me up on my knees. I could barely hold the position but everytime I dropped he hit my stomach that was blackened from the abuse. I knew it wouldn't end when the spanish man was done with me but I didn't expect my suffering to last so long. The white man beat me while he raped me. Leaving bites and bruised in his wake. He started with my anus and then went into my vagina as well. Once he was done the spanish man came back and threw me onto my side. As cliche as this may sound I tried to imagine I was somewhere else or with someone else. But it never worked for long. When their penis's entered my vagina it felt like a snake or a centipede was slithering into my body over and over. The pure disgust I felt in those moments were only trumped by the feeling of them cumming down my throat forcing me to taste them and swallow it all only to laugh when I gagged and vomited. They often stood back and marveled at their handy work. Their semen oozed from my mouth mixing with vomit. They admired the pink color created with their semen and the blood they caused to flow from my anus. The whole time they smirked and smiled.

"These guys are sick fucks. If I could get my fucking hands on them I would give them worse. " Polly said silent tears rolling down her face. She had remained silent the entire time but her facial expressions spoke volumes to how she felt. Most importantly though there was sadness, sympathy, rage, fury, disgust, there was no pity and that comforted me. "You kept this inside the entire time and never told anyone. My god Piper I am so sorry. I wish I was there to help you." She sobbed out as she clutched onto me as if her life depended on it.

"I don't" I said my tone deathly serious. I wouldn't wish what happened to me on my worst enemy so there was no way in hell I'd want my best friend there with me. "If you were there it would be worse because I would have to watch them rape you and strip you of everything you are and the whole time I would be begging them to keep raping me and leave you alone. It would be torture and I don't even want to entertain the thought."

"Please tell me the story is over?" Polly begged softly I shook my head,no. She let out a sob but gripped my hand and tried to look strong.

I layed on my side listening to him grunt and moan. I had long since stopped struggling and just laid there limp as he continued to break my body. But as I lay there a simple question popped up in my mind. He said they were just doing their job which means someone sent them.

"Why?" My throat was sore from their rough treatment so it came out as a small noise. Barely audible to the human ear.

"Why?" I repeated again wanting an answer to my question. It was the least I deserved after the pure hell and torture they had put me through.

"Why?" The spanish man stopped mid thrust and smiled widely as if he was wondering when I would ask. My question repeated itself in my head until it became a mantra

"Why why why why WHY!" As I continued my pain soon became anger and my anger morphed into sorrow and in turn my sorrow because complete anguish. As I lay there on the cold store floor sobbing out the word why over and over again I failed to notice the men standing. They began to get dressed and I just curled myself into a fetal position hoping to whatever deity would listen that the men would display an ounce of mercy and kill me. The spanish man came up to me and slowly wrapped his fingers around my neck. He applied pressure and before long I was dying from the lack of oxygen. The first image to pop in my head was of Alex than Cal my brother , than Polly and finally my parents. However the man didn't kill me and when he looked back down at me he was smiling as though he knew I wanted to die and was denying me the right to. I didn't have the strength to sob or at least that's what I thought before they answered my question.

"Our employer gave us the answer to your question. Are you ready?" The white man smiled and spoke once more. "This is what you get for leaving Alex when she needed you." With that the men left talking amongst themselves and chuckling.

"I just laid there in pain unable to move. I wanted nothing more than to run far away but I didn't have the strength to. So I laid there hoping I would simply die or maybe wake up and find out that it was all just a vivid nightmare." I had kept some parts of the story out because Polly didn't need to hear all the gruesome detail. Before I could stop myself I begin to sob uncontrollably. It was the first time in four years that I ever told someone what took place that night. I don't know when but Polly came into the hospital bed with me and held me.

"Piper we need to get you help." She said rubbing my back. I had not stopped sobbing and I didn't think I would stop anytime soon. It's at times like these when the memories are at the forefront of my mind that I shot up. "Not just for the drugs but for this too. You need to talk to a professional." She whispered.

"I know" Was the only words I could get out between the sniffling and cries.

"I love you Piper." She said once again my only reply being that I knew.

"I'm gonna help you." Polly said with determination in her voice. Nobody could argue with a determined Polly. A nurse walks into the room followed by police officers.

"Ms. Chapman we are here to arrest you for the possession and use of narcotics." One officer said his face neutral and his tone professional.

"Possession?" I questioned knowing I didn't have any on me when I od'd

"Yes we found a stash of heroin in you bedroom." The officer said

"Did you have a search warrant?" Polly was the one to speak this time. Our questions seemed to irritate the officers female partner.

"No, your mother gave us access and allowed us to search the house." She said staring at me intently. I wonder if it's because of the dry tears on my face.

"Which means you can't charge me with possession. My mother doesn't have the right to give you access to my home. It's not under her name or even insurance." I say trying to contain the smugness in my voice. But than Polly turns to me and asks

"Would it really be so bad for you to go to prison for a while Piper? You would be away from heroin, you would get help for the drugs and you would get help for what happened to you. Without heroin you would be forced to deal with the real issue which is getting help for what that bitch did to you." Piper said softly most likely hoping I wouldn't get mad at her for suggesting that I would be better off in prison.

"Yeah maybe if I get put in a good prison. Sometimes it's the guards who supply inmates with the drugs. Also in prison you are just a number and they can pat you down whenever they want. I would be a female inmate surrounded by male guards who have the authority to do whatever they want to me." I said shivering at the mere thought of being so vulnerable again.

"What if I could make sure you get placed in a good prison where corrupt stuff like that doesn't happen. I can't argue with the fact that stuff like that does happen in prisons and I can't promise you all female guards but I can take you to one of the best prisons in the country. I can also make sure you get the help you need and I'll even visit. How does that sound?" The female guard says sounding genuine and determined. Determined to do what I don't know.

"Can we speak you you alone ?" Polly asked. I didn't know what she was planning but I knew I could trust Polly with my safety. The officer turned to her partner and they both nodded. The nurse left as well after taking my vitals.

"Piper I know it was four years ago but I think in order for her to understand the type of help you need we should at least give her a vague account of what happened." Polly said once again speaking with a gentle caution.

"I can't do it again Polly. This is the first time since it happened that I told anyone and it's too much for me and-"

"Sssh." She said interrupting me before I began to cry again. "I will tell her ok? And I will do it outside you just rest your eyelids for a second, k" she said sweetly. Her tone reminded me of the times in college when she took care of hungover Piper. She and the officer stepped outside leaving me with my thoughts and rampaging feelings. Now that I was alone it was hard to ignore it, the gnawing feeling in my stomach and chest. The craving was kicking in and I think it is because of all the emotional turmoil that has hit me since I woke up. I needed a fix and I needed it soon but there was no way to get out of the hospital given that I was under arrest. I turned my head and looked around my room for the first time. There were two doors white walls, white curtains, and my clothes were on the chair to the left right by the window. I wasn't dumb enough to think I could make it down the emergency stairs at the side of the building, no, not in my physical state. However as I lay there with the craving growing stronger by the second I began to change my mind. That is until I stood to my feet and was hit with a major headache which caused me to collapse back onto the bed. I'm groaning in pain when the door opens the officer and Polly came back inside the room. Polly ran to my side and tried to help me.

"What did you do Piper?" She asked as she tried to get me back under the sheets.

"You were trying to run away?" The officer asked accusingly

"No, I was trying to go back to my apartment-"

"To hid the drugs?" The officer asked once again her tone was accusing but as she stared at me saw the real answer. "Or use them." She sighed

"I can't deal with emotions without them. Please." I knew it was stupid of me to beg a police officer to let me use heroin but I was becoming that desperate.

Sighing again she came over to the bed and helped Polly get me situated. "Look kid," I inwardly wince at the use of Alex's nickname for me but neither of them notice. "it's too soon for you to be having withdrawal." The officer said putting her hand on my sweating forehead.

"It's not withdrawal it's cravings." I say trying to keep my eyes open.

"That means you've been using this thing like a happy pill to a depressed person. Anytime you wake up from the nightmares you use, anytime you think about what happen to you you use. It's going to be especially hard for you to quit cold turkey but that's the only way to quit heroin. You're going to need support inside and out. I have a sister who was an addict she is at litchfield. You had about 1/8th of an ounce so that is five in a half years. I will call my sister and she will help you. From what I hear Litchfield inmates are very community based. So she has a prison family she cares about a lot. Your friend Polly will be able to visit and I will visit as well. However none of this matters if you don't actually try. I know that right now you can't honestly tell me you want to get clean but I need you to honestly tell me you'll try." I listened to the officer's words but she was right I couldn't tell her honestly that I wanted to get clean. I wasn't even sure I could tell her I would try.

"Piper please. I know there is no way for you to go back to who you were before Super Cunt and I am not asking you to. I am asking you to get help so you can be ok again. You have to heal from what she did and move on from heroin. We should go on runs together again and talk about the world. Remember when we had that huge debate over the 2016 election while we were jogging. People were staring at us like we were crazy." Polly chuckled and so did I. It was the first real smile I had in awhile which just made me realize how much I'd been pushing my friends away.

"Yeah and then some people joined us. It was so funny." I said smiling still. I looked up to the ceiling and closed my eyes searching deep within myself so that I could give the officer an honest answer. Then I look into Polly's eyes once more before turning to the officer and giving my answer.

"Yes, I can promise you that I will try to make it and get clean." The officer looked relieved and sighed.

"Good" she said before walking over to me pulling out her cuffs. "Sorry about this but I have to and it has nothing to do with you trying to leave. You are technically under arrest. Since you have confessed there will be no trial but you will have to sign a confession. You will be moved there as soon as the hospital deems you ready. As soon as you arrive your five and a half year sentence will begin. You will be given weekly or daily shots to help with your withdrawal. The symptoms of withdrawal don't vary but the intensity does and like I said given how you've been using it your withdrawal will be hard. I'm not going to sugarcoat it. My sister's name is Nicky Nichols she will help."

"Thank you officer Nichols." Polly said with genuine gratitude. I just drifted off to sleep think about the next five and a half years and what they may hold for me.