Do i know where this is going? Nope. I guess we'll all find out together. Should i be publishing this straight away without properly checking it? Probably not. oops

publishing date: 26/03/2020

Chapter 2

Pain is a peculiar thing, but necessary I guess. It's to help us survive right? But why does it feel like my own mind likes to torture m?

-Lee

I haven't been able to sleep for the past 5 days. Even before that man, panda guy as I had taken to calling him, had suddenly appeared yesterday i had already been struggling to sleep, but now my thoughts were consumed with his eerily familiar face. There was something so off about him, something not entirely normal- whatever normal is.

No matter how hard I try to concentrate on something else I can't. He's consuming my thoughts, but I don't know why.

That is a lie. I do know, but i don't want to admit it. I don't want to remember.

My hands shake with anxiety as I think back to his gaze-penetrating and devoid of any emotions-black obsidian pits.

I rub at my eyes and stare into the grimy mirror of one of the many bathrooms on campus, the bags under my eyes becoming more prominent every single day. If I kept it up any longer my bags would be almost as bad as panda guy's. There I go again, thinking about him. Stop.

I groan loudly and rub at my eyes again in aggravation as if it would suddenly banish all of my fatigue. When I remove my hands, I stop. I stare intently at my reflection. I notice somewhere in the background of my loud and chaotic thoughts that I'm shaking. I'm shaking so hard my legs threaten to collapse under me because what I see in that mirror should not be possible.

It isn't me.

What's looking back at me in the mirror is definitely not a normal European girl with black hair and green eyes. What's looking back at me is nothing. The mirror is blank...well not entirely. It's subtle, but it's there. A black cloud of dust and mist taints the mirror.

"No" I clutch at the rim of the sink, my knuckles whitening. I'm scared, I am terrified. He shouldn't be here. He can't be here. He promised

"No no no no," I breath out and clutch at my chest. My heart is beating wildly, but it's still beating. Panicked yes but it's strong and it comforts me. I hesitantly look back to the mirror

I know it's not me who is causing my hand to rise, i am panicking, but I do not resist. I know what's happening; i'm powerless to stop it. I press my hand flat against the mirror and suddenly I am falling.

Everything around bursts into colour. Yellows, greens and blues assault my vision and blind me. There are images that shoot past so quickly they are merely blurs. A notebook. A boy with brown hair. And B...no it's not B. It's that man. The same one from yesterday

My stomach churns and I feel the acid rising in my throat. I didn't miss this.

Why are you doing this? You promised.

My limbs are being pulled in every which way. I feel like I'm drowning, but there's so much air roaring through my ears that I know I'm wrong. I must be wrong.

You're a valuable piece in this game I have woven, Lailani. You didn't really think you could escape your fate for so long, did you?

You've always had a flair for the dramatics

The small amount of snark is quickly being taken over by the panic that is now over clouding my senses and just before i think i can't take it any more everything stops.

I'm in the public bathroom, sprawled on the white tiled floor. I exhale shakily and lift my head looking around cautiously for him. When I confirm I'm alone-I'm never alone though am i?- I agonisingly drag myself up until I'm standing.

I smooth down my blouse and fix my hair. I don't look in the mirror as I exit the bathroom.

He's following me. I know he is. He's the shadow I see in the corner of my eye, the gaze I can feel burning into the back of my head. He wants me to know that he's there. He wants me to listen to him, but I've never been known to be the obeying type.

I plaster a bright flawless smile onto my face and wave with as much enthusiasm as I can muster.

"Kuro! Mira!"

The two stop, both turning to greet me. It's not until I get closer to them that I finally see him standing there. The boy with brown hair, although it does look more auburn in such bright sunlight.

I can already feel the anticipation rising within me. I know that as soon as i reach them it'll be the start of another game that i don't want to partake in. My feet keep moving regardless and when I reach them I don't falter, i don't panic; I laugh and act like everything is fine, like the boy right in front of me is not Kira.

My heart thuds in my chest and I urge it to never stop.

'don't you find it weird that we know nothing about each other?'

'don't you find it annoying how you can't shut up for two seconds?'

I huff and cross my arms over my chest. My lips are pressed together, but i soon grow bored of watching him plan his new violent escapade and blurt:

'y'know one of these days you're gonna get yourself killed'

he retorts snarky:

'only if i don't kill myself first to stop hearing your stupid voice.'

I'm staring at him. Well kinda. Truthfully I'm alternating between staring at the back of his head and trying to pay attention to the professor at the front of the room. My hand is taking notes that I barely comprehend and I just can't stop staring.

I wish i was staring for more trivial reasons like: he's handsome or I'm wondering what conditioner he uses, but no. I'm staring because lo and behold there is the true owner of that goddamn notebook. He's hovering casually like he's totally not causing me to be on the brink of a panic attack in the middle of a criminology lecture.

I frown in confusion and spare a glance to the side of me. Black obsidian pits stare back at me unblinkingly. How he managed to escape my notice is beyond me but that doesn't matter now, what matters is that he's staring at me and I can't look away. i can feel the tremors starting in my hands. He's still staring and I'm still trying to get my head in order.

I raise one of my still trembling hands and smile hesitantly whilst mouthing a 'hi' at him.

He seems to startle and blinks. Once. Twice. His hand rises and he waves back, but he looks unsure of himself like he doesn't know why he's even responding in the first place.

I turn back to the front and silently mutter curses throughout the remainder of the class.

I've caught their attention now albeit unintentionally. Whether I like it or not my fate was sealed ever since the stray tennis ball gravitated towards me.

He knows what he's doing, I'll give him that.

The time for you to make your first move is approaching, my wildcard

well that happened. Good luck future me on the next chapter that will come in approximately 2 days-never