So I decided that my One Shot 'Finally the Pretence is Over' wasn't gonna be a One Shot anymore. It deserved more ;)!

I would like to thank everyone for their support, reading and reviewing my work, it means the world to me, thank you!

Finally I would like to dedicate this chapter to a special friend of mine 'vickster51' for your endless support, advice and friendship, it is so much appreciated xx

'Finally the Pretence is Over'

Part 2

Harvey left the lobby when he had somewhat finally regained his composure; he was still shaken, the evening had took a turn he hadn't envisaged, he had been tormented by Donna's kiss last night; the feelings it had stirred up within him, he had been confused, and this had led to anger, misdirected anger at Donna; when there was only one person he should have been angry with, himself.

He had to put things right; he had to stop hurting people; he had to make things right with Donna and that meant firstly breaking it off with Paula immediately. He realized now he had been running, running away from his true feelings for Donna. The thing that had scared him most in life to this point was letting Donna know how he felt about her, but now the much greater fear was losing the love of his life forever!

He found himself wandering the streets, not wanting to go home, he knew he would have to face Paula, tell her the truth, not an experience he would relish, admitting he had been wrong, but he owed her that much. He dreaded the possible fallout.

He was already late, he saw several missed calls from her, but he needed to regain some composure before facing her. He figured she would already know something was up. He hated himself for hurting others through his own denial. He realized now that no other dalliance or relationship had ever held a candle to Donna, she was it for him and would always be.

If Donna hadn't kissed him the other night, he wondered if he would have ever plucked up the courage to act on his feelings. It scared him to the core to know if she hadn't given them that jolt, he may never have acted until it was too late. He just prayed it wasn't too late now.

He found a bar, ordered himself a scotch for Dutch courage. He knew he was being a coward, the great Harvey Specter, afraid of the truth. He decided to order another drink to muster enough courage to face the music.

He then took out his cell phone, he had to let Donna know, she had waited long enough, he began to text 'Donna I am so sorry. this is all my fault, I'm going to put things right, please wait for me, please, H.'

...

He arrived back home sometime after 11. She was still up, waiting, perched on the edge of the leather sofa in his apartment.

"Harvey, you're back!", " Paula exclaimed; she appeared to be on edge.

He knows, she knows, that something is up ... there is no hiding it now.

He decided to cut to the chase, not feeling able to drag it out. Not wanting to. It's not fair to anybody at this stage.

"I need to talk to you," his voice shaky, he didn't want to hurt her, but there was no easy way to say it.

"Sounds ominous Harvey," Paula exclaimed cautiously.

"What's happened?, you were due back hours ago; you didn't even answer your phone, I thought something had happened ... for God's sake!"

Harvey fidgeted with his hands, looking down, where to start, he thought...

"The truth Harvey, please ...you owe me that much at least ….. please ….something is not right ... I just know it ... I feel it!" Paula was becoming agitated.

"Something did happen ... Last night ...I ...um Donna …. I kissed Donna", it was out there now, no turning back.

Donna didn't deserve the blame, if anyone cheated it was Harvey, he may not have been officially with Donna, but he felt as though he had betrayed her; denying their connection; his love for her all these years. Donna was right, she had to watch while he dated and chased anyone but her for years. He had been cruel in his attempt to not screw things up with her.

Harvey didn't expect the reaction he received from Paula, she was especially quiet now.

"Paula …. please say something … anything?" He implored her.

"Say what Harvey?….. that I'm shocked?" She laughed to herself momentarily "I really do choose them, don't I ...?"

"No Harvey ... unfortunately I'm not shocked…. surprised perhaps? … but not shocked … you see I'm sorry too Harvey …"

"I knew ….. I knew that your heart was not there for the taking, and I tried anyway, what does that make me?" Paula looked at Harvey almost apologetically then, looking away into the faux fire that was turned on.

Harvey looked back at Paula somewhat puzzled.

"It's her …. It's Donna …. isn't it? I don't even need an answer, its obvious Harvey, to everyone but you! Your heart has always been with her … all these years, hasn't it ? You've been fighting it tooth and nail ... but love wins out ... you can only hide from it so long I guess."

"I was your therapist Harvey … I should have known better …. And for that I'm sorry ... so very sorry."

Paula looked away again, deep in thought.

"You know ... she even came to see me once ... before all of this... at my office."

Harvey looked up, suddenly interested.

"Yes Harvey, Donna came to my office ... looking for you" Paula peered across at Harvey instinctively irked that speaking of Donna had managed to fully get his attention.

"But you didn't know that .… and after our little chat … I knew … I knew that she was in love with you."

"When?" Harvey wanted answers now. "When did she try to find me?"

"Sometime during Mike's trial ... the timing doesn't matter Harvey."

It was Donna. It mattered. It mattered to him.

He felt he needed to be honest with Paula; perhaps not doing so before had caused all of this.

"To be fair Paula ... I wasn't entirely honest with you either ... when we first met ..." he looked down at his hands nervously, wanting to look anywhere but at Paula; the guilt was eating away at him; all he could think about was Donna ..."if I'm to finally be honest with you, I have to be honest with myself first ... you see Donna was never just my secretary ... we did have a history ... it was our secret" he smiled slightly, without even realizing he had, at the thought of 'the other time' "and I guess ... I fell for her ... I realize now ... that ... that I'm in love with her!" He said it, it was out there now, no turning back. The relief washed over him, of telling another soul his deepest secret.

Paula gasped, hearing him say it aloud; after listening to his admission it finally all made sense to her now ...

"You slept together ...didn't you?" He could hear the bitterness in her tone.

"And what Harvey? You thought you could just go back to normal ... forget it ever happened?" She laughed now in disbelief.

He could detect a a slight sarcasm in her tone. He stayed silent there was nothing else to say, now she knew.

"But I guess I'm no better dating a former patient ... all against my better judgement. Maybe it was jealousy … I wanted to experience that kind of love."

She looked resigned now ... everything made sense, all the jigsaw puzzle pieces had fit together.

"Don't waste any more time Harvey ... yours, hers, mine even … don't hurt yourself or anyone else … don't you see the two of you are running around in circles, as the saying goes Harvey 'you've both ruined each other for anybody else'."

He couldn't deny what Paula was saying and more so he didn't want to, he was in love with Donna, his heart was 100% hers, that was true.

He felt terrible, he had really messed up all these years, hurt so many people, but mostly Donna.

"I'm just going to gather my things Harvey... just go to her! …. You know you want to!"

"Don't worry I'm not going to trash your apartment Harvey, I just want to leave in a dignified manner and you being here, I'd prefer if you weren't … please give me some space ... it's the one thing I ask of you now" she implored him.

Harvey knew it was the least he could do, and he felt like a shit, but it was true, he needed to be with Donna.

He stood to leave, grabbing the overcoat he had placed on the sofa only moments previously.

"I understand ... take all the time you need ... I AM sorry Paula ... truly sorry. I guess I was still pretty messed up."

"I know Harvey ... I'm sorry too .. take care," she was saddened but sincere in her tone.

"Tell Donna ... tell her I'm sorry" Harvey could tell she meant it in that moment.

And with that he left his apartment to go finally make things right with Donna. Lord knows he wondered why she would still want him ... the way he had treated her all of these years ... he hoped he could make it up to her ... he vowed to spend the rest of his life trying if nothing else.

...

Upon returning home Donna had thrown off the day's workwear and put on her favourite black sparkly loungewear. She had then curled up with a glass of wine onto her sofa, what an evening, what a run in with Harvey. What did she expect, she was a fool to think that there wouldn't be such ramifications from their kiss; a fool to think he would change, perhaps she had ruined things between them forever. But at least he knew how she felt. At least, as Louis had said, she wouldn't regret not letting him know her true feelings for the rest of her life.

Surely the aftermath could not be any worse than going back to the pretence that what they had with each other was enough. She at least knows he feels it too, he kissed her back, but that didn't mean he was willing to act on his feelings, they had been here before on the verge of something that had sent him running backwards rather than propel them forwards towards each other.

She had seen the text as she drank her third glass of wine ... she dared to hope ... but she had been here before so held herself back.

Just when she was almost asleep Donna was roused by 3 firm knocks to her front door ... she didn't have to guess .. her heart leapt with hope but also dread.

When she didn't respond, the knocks came again and then his voice ... the voice she loved; she couldn't say no to him; but more than that she needed to see him too.

"Donna ... Donna, I know you're there, please ... I need to see you." Harvey's tone was apologetic and desperate.

Looking at the clock on the wall she could see that it was 12.40 am.

She walked to the door timidly, she had to see him, the kiss the other night had awakened her need to be close to him physically. What trouble that kiss had stirred up. It may be the making or the breaking of them she figured.

Upon reaching the door, Donna put her palm on the back of it, as if to feel closer to him.

"I don't want to fight anymore Harvey ... I'm tired .. tired of this dance, this pretence." She called through the door to him.

"I don't want to fight either. I meant what I said before .. Donna ... I am so sorry .. none of this .. is your fault .. this is down to me .. I messed up ... I tried to be different with you ...but I fucked up ... I knew you were special right from the start... I knew I would only mess it up ... and by trying not to hurt you, I still did."

Donna did not want Harvey feeling solely responsible, he was right earlier .. she had started this with her rule many moons ago.

With that thought she opened the door to Harvey, who was more dishevelled than she had remembered earlier.

"May I come in," he smiled sheepishly at her, his eyes were red.

Donna nodded, stepping aside, she could see he had been crying, it caught her breath ...

"Thanks for opening the door Donna ... I won't take long ... I just had to see you ... I ... I couldn't leave things like they were left earlier ..."

He moved over to her sofa and sat down. He looked defeated in that moment she thought.

She went to her kitchenette and grabbed a clean glass and poured him some wine; She was nervous for where this conversation would take them.

"Donna ... you know I never ever meant to hurt you."

Donna could see the emotion in Harvey, he was barely holding back the tears. She knew he was being sincere.

It reminded her of the night she had left Harvey to go work for Louis. In front of her tonight was a broken man like then.

Donna was dying inside seeing the man she loved so vulnerable in front of her. It was breaking her too, she had never seen him as broken as this. Perhaps they needed to be this raw with each other for anything to change, she considered, but God it was killing her to see him so upset.

He choked back the emotion "Donna ... I never wanted to hurt you ... above anyone else ... I thought ... I stupidly thought that if I didn't get too close to you ... that I wouldn't be able to hurt you ... but ... but I fell in love with you" his words were soft, the words she had dreamed of hearing him utter.

Donna had gasped slightly at his sincere declaration of love.

"I love you too Harvey, always .." Donna sniffled back her tears that were threatening to fall.

Suddenly the reality of their situation hit her again "But Harvey ... Paula?"

"It's over ... it would have never worked ... she knew ... she even said you came looking for me once; I guess she figured us out before we did. She was like all the others ... because they weren't you Donna ... they could never be you!"

"I'm so sorry for everything I have put you through, I'm yours ... if you want me? I've treated you so badly, how can you ever forgive me ...?"

"Harvey there were two of us in this dance ... this charade ... , if this is going to work we are going to have to focus on the future, not regret the past, it led us to the people we are now. No regrets." She smiled with a smile that lit up her eyes.

"My God ... you're beautiful ... I've always wanted to say that Donna ... "

Donna blushed at Harvey's words.

"I've always wanted to hear you say that to me!" She admitted blushing.

The tears rolled down his cheeks, he tried to stifle them back, but to no avail. Years of pent up emotions and suppression of his feelings were now spilling out.

Donna felt an urgent need to comfort him, their years of building walls with each other were crumbling in mere moments, she could feel it.

She took him then in her arms ... at first he resisted, but then he caved, falling into the one embrace he had craved and denied himself for all these years.

"Shush Harvey ... its ok now .. everything is ok now ... WE are gonna be OK." she knew it, they were finally letting each other in.

"You see" he sobbed "I'm more like my mother than I realize, I have been in a way cheating on you Donna, I know not technically but in here." As he pats his chest close to his heart.

This admission takes the breath from Donna.

"Harvey, no ... don't do this to yourself ... this is not down to you ... there were two of us in this ... it started with my bloody stupid rule!"

She caressed her hands through his hair. Kissing the top of his head.

They stayed like that, comforting each other for what felt like hours, but what was in fact mere minutes.

After some time they broke apart, Harvey took her hand and looked into her eyes with love.

"Do you realize all the times I've wanted to reach out, to hold you in my arms ... but I knew ... I knew if I did that Donna, I wouldn't be able to hold back ..."

Donna gasped nodding her head, tears welling up in her eyes, it had been the same for her. Both afraid they would be overcome with emotion. That the truth of their love for one another would come out by a mere touch.

"Me too Harvey, Me too." She admitted with a bright smile, her eyes glistening with tears.

Finally they were on the same page ... in the same moment.

"I can't go back Donna ... we've missed so much."

"I know ... no going back ... not now ... not from this," she nodded in agreement with Harvey.

Then in that moment they caught each others gaze, it reminded her of the moment on this sofa over a year and a half ago; the night he had saved her from a near certain prison sentence.

His gaze was intense, focusing on her lips then moving back to her eyes and back again.

He took her wine glass and his own and placed them on the coffee table beside them.

Harvey leaned towards Donna focusing his gaze on her lips. Pushing a strand of her beautiful hair behind her ear.

Before she had time to register anything else, Harvey had placed the softest of kisses on her lips, filled with love, tenderness, honesty and passion.

Donna opened her mouth, drinking him in, the kiss became more urgent, desire filled them both, no holding back not anymore.

Harvey moved over Donna who was now lying back pressed into the armrest of her sofa.

Harvey broke apart suddenly, looking down tenderly at Donna; wanting to make sure he did this right, for Donna. She was his entire world.

"Are you sure, we can wait?" he panted, secretly hoping she wanted to continue too.

"We've waited long enough" she smiled up lovingly and longingly at Harvey, as she drew him down to meet her once more.

There was no going back now, they had waited for this second time for far too long.

Finally the pretence was over!

The End

...

Thank you so much for reading!

Hope you enjoyed it !

Mary xxx