Chapter 1: The Greatest Plan Ever

Disclaimer: I do not own the Mario series or characters. All credit goes to Nintendo.

Bowser sat atop his throne with a grumpy expression, impatiently tapping his claws on the armrest while his highest-ranked minions spoke amongst themselves. Shifting irritably atop the green upholstery, he remembered how many times someone or something had destroyed his precious homes. Between Mario storming the castle, some Beanish runt setting bombs at the base, or a disturbed maniac turning it into a giant mecha, he barely had any time to get used to one building before it needed to be replaced.

The audience chamber boasted wooden pillars and floors decorated with beautiful tapestries in addition to the banners bearing his own face. His so-called generals sat atop cushions on either side of the hall, separated by a large table in the center. It was his job as the Kingdom's Ruler to preside over official meetings, but the Koopa King's temper had been worse than ever since his recent failure on the moon.

A gray-clad Shy Guy wearing a military hat shook his non-existent fist. "You sir, are a fool beyond any imbecilic rube of which I have ever had the misfortune of acquaintance."

"Blasphemy, General Guy! You dare mock the signature strategy consistently employed by the proud Goomba Squadron!?" Bellowed a gargantuan Goomba, whose cross-eyed gaze made a stark contrast with his dignified white mustache and golden crown. "March straight forward into the enemy's feet. That is simply the way it's always been!"

"That maneuver lacks common sense and is certain to fail!" the general argued.

Roy Koopa let out an exaggerated groan, a vein throbbing on his head. "You morons! Since when has that stupid idea ever worked!?"

"You're all a bunch of idiots!" Iggy answered from behind, his brother's sunglasses flashing dangerously in the dim light.

"We all know the Goomba Squad's only good for softening up the enemy. They're just a bunch of idiots who pick a direction and charge blindly."

"I share the sentiment, brother." Ludwig nodded cooperatively before revealing his signature one-fanged grin. "However, you are the last person in this room who should be questioning the intelligence of others."

"I'm sorry... I couldn't hear anything over the sound of your horrible music!" Roy bit back.

"Would you care to eat those glasses?" the eldest Koopaling reached for his magic wand.

Once again the bickering between troops continued, and most of the others weren't pleased. Kammy Koopa sat in a smaller seat to the left of her master's throne, her curved pink-rimmed glasses and long gray hair distinguishing her as a female Magikoopa. Bowser Jr. sat in the smaller seat to his father's right. Being young he was naturally bored with the meeting, though she could tell he was beginning to pay attention, if only to observe the violence that was certain to ensue. Meanwhile, the old witch slapped her forehead as the arguments began to escalate.

"What'd you say, punk!?" the younger Koopaling shouted. Pointing at his fellow minions. "I gotta be at least a hundred times smarter than Morton or Boom Boom!"

"HEY!" the two minions shouted angrily.

Iggy let out a demented cackle. "Considering they're both dumber than rocks, that ain't sayin' much!"

The brutish Koopaling glanced at his six siblings for support, earning a collection of disgruntled murmurs from the others. Larry ran a hand through his spiky blue tuft while Morton growled in annoyance. Lemmy remained un-invested as he casually juggled a pair of balls with one hand, having zoned out shortly after the meeting began.

The lone female of the Koopalings rolled her eyes, instead shifting her focus to the mustached chestnut creature. "Goombas are always placed on the front lines because they're the least useful in serious missions."

"You are mistaken, Mistress Wendy." Goomboss arched a bushy white eyebrow, annoyed but still wary of her higher rank. "We soldiers of the proud Goomba Unit are dispatched first because we are the most loyal and devoted of King Bowser's minions. Is that not right, my lord?"

The Koopa King glanced up as he heard his name. "Yeah, that's why." he muttered distantly, his eyes bulging as he noticed some of the Koopalings had begun brawling. "Gah, I just had this entire place fixed up!" His pleas went unheard.

"You want a piece of me, smarty-pants!" Roy began tossing whatever he could find at Ludwig.

Bowser Jr. cheered and shook his fists in the air like a sports fan whose team just won the world championship "Hahaha, it was worth coming to this meeting after all!"

"Who asked for your opinion, runt!?"

"Such savage behavior..." Ludwig dodged a rather expensive-looking vase, placing both hands on his hips as his brother took a breather. "Are you quite finished destroying Lord Bowser's things?"

His words seemed to have a sobering effect on the disgruntled Koopa. "Yeah, you're right... Guess I'll have to improvise." He pretended to be calm before seizing Lemmy from behind, the latter screaming as he was hurled across the room at their oldest sibling.

Ludwig hit the floor as the smallest Koopaling soared past, crashing headfirst into Bowser's lap and knocking him down. A silence fell over the room as the gathered minions realized what had happened, but the quiet was immediately shattered by a familiar roar. The Koopa King tossed Lemmy aside with one hand while hoisting himself up with the other, the entire castle rumbling as he stomped the floor.

"Enough of this!" Bowser inhaled deeply and released a mighty gout of flame, leaving Roy humorously charred as the others scampered out of the way.

The offending Koopaling coughed up smoke before hitting the floor with a loud thud. Hearing his boss's footsteps coming closer, he glanced up just in time to see an angry glare and gnashing teeth inches from his own face.

"I, uh... Didn't mean it." he reasoned, wracking his mind for a better excuse. When the Koopa King's expression didn't change, he shot back up, raising his hands timidly. "Okay, so I got a little carried away. No need to get too upset."

"Carried away?" The Koopa King repeated incredulously, sounding more like an angry parent.

"Yeah yeah! The pressure's been crazy lately... I'm thinkin' I could use a little vacation... Maybe some time on Isle Delfino. I hear the Beanbean Kingdom's pretty nice this time of year." To his surprise, the big boss let out a chortle.

"Oh, is that all..." Bowser cut through his babble. He turned around for a moment and began to walk away before sending his servant sailing through the roof of the castle with a wave of his mighty tail. Roy flailed his arms as if trying to fly as he went flying off to parts unknown.

The Koopa King's son giggled mischievously as plaster landed on the carpet where Roy had been standing a second ago. "Hope you enjoy the free vacation, loser!" he jeered.

"Let this be a lesson, son. Employee benefits are an important part of any bad guy's relationship with their minions. You guys can all agree, ain't that right?"

The other minions either remained silent or hastily agreed with their leader. While Bowser trudged slowly back to his throne, Kammy Koopa waved her wand, summoning a pair of Hammer Bros. with a spell. The newcomers seemingly appeared from nowhere and began looking around confusedly before realizing what had happened.

"Fix this mess, immediately!" the elderly crone snapped, the two dashing from the room and returning seconds later with lumber and tools. They began quietly repairing the damage. It was a regular occurrence for fights to break out during minion meetings, especially when their beloved leader was in such a nasty mood.

"Kinda harsh, don't you think? Normally a good roasting would've been sufficient, but a trip to the moon, too!?" Larry whispered to his sister. "He's definitely gonna feel that in the morning."

"Lord Bowser's been really mad since that crazy wedding." Wendy crossed her arms. "I mean who wouldn't be upset after having their big day ruined by a stinky plumber."

They were all aware of his nasty temper, though lately things were even worse thanks to his most recent failures. It took so much work and vision to create the perfect marriage ceremony, and everything went up in smoke.

The Koopa King sat back down, the crummy atmosphere reminding him of that disaster. He hired a clan of moon rabbits called the Broodals in order to ensure his wedding to Princess Peach would be absolutely perfect, believing that using professionals instead of relying too much on the Koopa Troop's army would be smart. Pfft... As it turned out the overpaid loonies were even more useless than his own henchmen. That was a million coins he would never see again. All that planning and plundering for nothing, just because a certain plumber and his do-gooder friends couldn't mind their own business.

After a while longer, the meeting returned to its original uneventful pace. One or more of his minions would propose an evil scheme, and someone would argue in favor of their own, or try to find a way to discredit the other person. Normally their leader would delegate things on his own, but lately he had decided to see if anyone else could come up with a feasible plan. Needless to say, they had only proved him wrong. After hearing some varyingly pointless input from the Bob-omb King, Koopa Brothers, Kamek, Whomp, and the Elite Trio, whatever was left of his patience had hit rock bottom.

Once the bickering began to subside, he grumpily addressed the gathering. "What a waste of time! Is that all you cretins have to say, or did everyone show up tonight just to annoy the pants off of me?"

"But you're not wearing pants, Lord Bowser..." a random Goomba responded cluelessly, yelping as the tyrant's gaze fell on him.

"I don't remember asking for your opinion, dumbo!"

"It's just... ... I had some ideas that might be useful and I thought you might like to..."

The Koopa King opened his mouth to shout, stopping when he caught a clear view of the dim-witted minion who had spoken up. The Goomba in question had a stack of plates balanced precariously on his head and was likely a member of the castle kitchen staff sent to clean up. He had probably entered the room just to collect the mess from the elite troops' meals, but despite the fanged mushroom's low service rank, something seemed awfully familiar about him.

Bowser's expression became strangely thoughtful, though it took several minutes of silence before he was able to figure out where he had seen him before. "Hey! Ain't you the pipsqueak who bumped my noggin after that creepazoid totaled the Koopa Cruiser!?"

"Um... ... ... Yes..." the Goomba answered slowly, not entirely sure how his king would react.

"You waste of space! I thought I fired you!" he pounded the floor angrily, causing the little minion to jump around in a panic.

"I can't believe I'm defending a Goomba, but this little guy's got a lot of spunk for his size." Larry interjected, the gesture surprising his fellow minions. Their leader blinked at these words, as if he had thought about something important. "Don't you remember him, Lord Bowser?"

"Indeed, that fellow did lead us to victory against that mind-controlling menace in the Beanbean Kingdom." Ludwig agreed, the eldest Koopaling's words sinking in.

Wendy shrugged. "Sure he's an idiot, but if he's got any ideas, I say let him speak."

The Koopa King eyed his quarry before sighing in defeat. "All right! Fine! If you've got something to say, now's the time to spit it out!"

Captain Goomba jumped onto the table and cleared his throat, much of the displeasure of his superiors. "While doing my super important cleaning job, I just so happened to overhear your conversation, and it made me think back to all of those exciting battles we endured when I was erroneously made temporary captain of the Koopa Troop."

Bowser rested an elbow on his throne, using his hand to prop up his head. "Just get to the point!"

"Of course Lord Bowser... Right away." the spunky minion bowed deeply. "During our quest to stop Fawful and rescue his majesty, we minions were often forced to assess the opposing lineup and plan accordingly to gain the advantage in battle. Therefore, I believe we should approach every enemy the same way, including the most hated or our adversaries! That most heinous and cheating scoundrel... ... ... MARIO!"

The others began discussing amongst each other, though it was the Bob-omb King who openly addressed the little Goomba. "Have we not repeatedly faced Mario in battle, only for each of us to be defeated one after the next?"

"It bites to say this, but I'm not sure that menace even has a weakness." Iggy fumed.

The Shy Guy General jumped to his feet. "Not so fast, soldier! There is strength in numbers, and also advantages to be gained by utilizing weapons in battle." he announced with a military salute. "If we use hindsight to discover which battles Mario struggled with the most, we can send the right combination of troops to deal with him. With proper teamwork and strategy, we step onto the battlefield with an immediate advantage."

"That actually makes sense..." Goomboss blinked, surprised that he was actually in agreement.

Bowser placed his hands behind his head and leaned back slightly. "I guess it could work..." he bolted upright, a deep-throated laugh escaping his gut. "Gwahahahaha! In fact it's the best idea I've heard in a while! With Mario out of the way, no one will be able to stop me from kidnapping Princess Peach and taking over the world!"

"I'm not convinced." Larry looked uncomfortable under the scrutiny of his master's gaze, but chose to speak his mind nonetheless. "What about all the other meddlesome do-gooders out there that'll still be a problem? There's a ton of people around the world who love Mario, not to mention his brother whose name I can never remember."

"You think my pop's afraid of Green-Stache!?" Bowser Jr. protested with a chuckle. "I could beat that guy with one claw tied behind my shell."

The Bob-omb King stroked his face. "Luigi is not the only one who may oppose King Bowser's rule... I myself was once defeated by a hefty gentleman with a magnificent mustache. I do believe his name was Wario."

Kamek let out an irritable growl. "Not to mention that meddling dinosaur that's been helping the Mario Bros. for decades!"

"You all make an excellent point. However, there may be a solution to this problem." Ludwig tapped his own claws together menacingly, a look of malice tugging at the corners of his mouth. "What if we added those factors into the equation before seeking the solution. Surely that would ensure our success."

Bowser shifted his gaze to the Koopa composer, knowing the obnoxious genius always had a talent for thinking up plans. He had a penchant for creating diabolical weapons and deploying devious tactics, being one of the rare minions who had genuinely earned his master's respect. "What do you have in mind?"

"I'm certain you're aware that every hero has a habit of making multiple enemies? Mario alone has foiled the plans of countless villains. The oldest Koopaling smirked at the thought. "But what if we were to reach out to these third parties and conscript help from as many as we can. With our combined resources, we could easily stomp out anyone who would resist before they're even aware of our plans!"

"Hmmm... I remember some of those amateur bad guys, and I hate some of 'em almost as much as those pesky plumbers! It'd be embarrassing for a full-time final boss like me to be seen palling around with those B-List losers."

"We don't need help from those weaklings!" his son agreed, pounding one fist into the other.

Captain Goomba waddled across the table towards them. "I know you hate the competition, but do you hate them as much as Mario?"

The tyrant narrowed his eyes as if trying to envision the plan before gagging slightly. "Leaves a nasty taste in my mouth, but it's still better than anything else I've heard tonight. All right... Since no one has any better ideas, we'll be going along with this plan for now." He let out a proud roar and raised a fist in the air, his fire renewed. "What are ya waitin' for!? IT'S SHOW TIME!"

A loud cheer erupted throughout the room, interrupted by the nagging of a certain old hag. "We must begin the planning immediately! Everyone must know their part to play!" Kammy Koopa screeched in her witch-like tone.

"Everyone return to your posts and prepare your units. Standby until you receive further orders!" Bowser thundered, his gathered minions filing from the room en masse. As the eldest Koopaling and a certain Goomba turned to leave, the tyrant slammed his foot into their path. "Everyone except for you two!"

The miniscule mushroom stopped mid-step. "Me, my lord..."

"Yes you!" Kammy gave him a whack on the skull with her wand, eliciting a collective chortle from the other Koopas.

Their leader practically kicked her aside while sparing a glance at Ludwig. "Since you fine 'gentlemen' came up with this plan, I'm leaving you in charge of the preparations." He grinned evilly before resting a gentle claw on the little minion's head. "And since you've been so dang useful in the past, you'll be helping him every step of the way!"

"A Goomba in charge!" Bowser Jr. quipped, looking much less happy with the plan.

"Yup... I'm giving this annoying runt a chance to redeem himself." the spiky-shelled tyrant pulled a red flag out of nowhere before haphazardly strapping it onto his newly reappointed officer.

The Goomba began sobbing while fighting back tears of joy. "Y'mean I get to be captain, again?"

"Only on a trial basis!" Bowser stomped past his underlings with a small spring in his decidedly large gait. "You'll be my newest general if this scheme gets Princess Peach on my arm and Mario's head on a plate! Heck, I'll even toss in that ugly crown Goomboss wears, and his title if things work out."

Kammy Koopa sauntered over to him, beckoning him to bend over. "Are you sure about this, your gnarliness? He may have done well once before, but it's most unlikely that a miracle will happen twice. You can't be serious." she questioned in hushed whispers.

"Of course I am... A King always keeps his word!" the boss turtle pounded his own chest confidently before facing his troops. "Like I said, you're in charge of making this work out. Either one screws up, and I'll put you both through the grinder and feed you to the Chain Chomps!"

"Thank you so much for this second chance! I promise we won't fail you, oh great and mighty Lord Bowser."

Despite his earlier confidence, the oldest Koopaling suddenly looked much less eager. "You're saying either one of us could be held accountable for the other!?"

"Good job, genius. I always knew you were the smart one." Bowser grumbled sarcastically.

"No worries, Mister Ludwig. With your brains and my military expertise, there's no way we can mess up a perfect plan like this."

"Nothing is perfect until success is achieved, for it can never be assured!" Ludwig shot back angrily, before begging for leniency. "It's hardly fair for me to be in charge of such an unreliable subordinate. Certainly you would agree?"

"Tell it to someone who cares... Life's never fair!" Bowser replied gruffly before slamming the door shut behind him. His son and personal advisor followed closely at the Koopa King's heels. "It's time to go to bed, son."

"Awww... Do I have to, pop?"

"Fine, then do whatever ya want. Just don't burn down the castle down or wreck the place." he pat the boy's shoulder with a fatherly smile. "Bwahaha! Like I told ya, always trash someone else's kingdom if you need somethin' to do. An important lesson to live by, right boy?"

"Got it dad!" The prince bounced away in the opposite direction from his room.

"Real chip off the old block, aint he?" the Koopa King exchanged a glance with the elderly Magikoopa while looking surprisingly proud of his son's destructive tendencies.

"Reminds me of you as a lad, and your father before you." Kammy used a gnarled hand to wipe a sentimental tear from her aged face.

Needless to say, she had seen multiple generations of the Koopa Kingdom's Royal Family. She had served as a nanny to Bowser's father, later pawning the duty off on Kamek during the current king's childhood years. It had been a long and rewarding career serving under the monarchy, and she still remained an important contributor and key advisor to their beloved leader. There were some fools who called her a senile old hag behind her back, but their opinions be damned. She was still smarter than any of them would ever be.

"It seems like Master Ludwig is rather upset with your... ... stipulations." she spoke tactfully, knowing her position did not make her immune to the king's temper tantrums. "Anyone would be, considering the nincompoop you appointed as his partner."

"Of course he's worried, you crusty old buzzard. That's the point!"

She appeared confounded, though her stylized glasses lessened the impact. "Umm... ... It was?"

"That little guy came up with a half-baked idea that didn't stink, so I figured he deserved a shot. Sure he's a moron, but Ludwig's not! That's why I stuck 'em together... This way one guy gets the job done, and the other one makes sure the first doesn't screw up."

Kammy Koopa scratched her head. "And what about those rather graphic threats?"

"Incentive to make sure they don't mess up." Bowser grumbled, looking rather satisfied with his plan. "I'm betting Ludwig's already figured out what I was thinking, and that Goomba's so happy to be captain again, he's probably motivated enough already."

"Genius, my lord." she cheered, her words stroking her master's ego.

The burly Koopa threw a fist in the air, looking happier than he had since the moon wedding fiasco. "Anyone page the master of awesome!? No one's better at being bad than me!"

"And that's why you're the king!" the old crone reiterated, the pair's laughter echoing through the castle halls.

-Meanwhile- Metro Kingdom

New Donk City was easily one of the largest settlements in the world, rivaled only be Mushroom City in the Mushroom Kingdom, and Neo Bowser City in the Koopa Kingdom. Skyscrapers lined the sidewalks, and the streets were full of people dressed for work in gray suits and fedora hats. The business district was always busy during this day time of day, with taxis driving in and out of side streets, horns beeping, and traffic lights blaring, the city heights standing out against the open blue sky like a sparkling utopia.

In comparison to most other kingdoms, the Metro strip was home to a large population of humans, an unusual sight for most outsiders who visited their home. Humans could easily be found scattered throughout different locales around the world, but it was exceedingly rare for so many of their kind to congregate in a single country, let alone one settlement.

Mayor Pauline had taken a personal day for herself, a chance to unwind after being kidnapped and forced to attend Bowser's sham of a wedding. She had heard about the Koopa King from Mario while helping out as his toy company in the past, though having now met him in person, she really couldn't deny just how much of a nuisance the reptilian tyrant truly was. So much damage to her city just because he wanted to steal a bunch of wedding knickknacks. She put it out of her mind, as today the city had a very important visitor.

"You're lookin' a little blue. Something wrong?" Mario asked with a note of concern.

"Oh no, nothing of the sort. I was just wondering if you would like something to drink." she smiled warmly at her oldest friend. "Perhaps some coffee or tea?"

"Nah, not for me. Just a big ol' glass of milk, assuming it wouldn't be too much trouble."

"None at all." She headed for the kitchen, leaving him sitting alone in her living room.

The red-clad plumber took a moment to observe his surroundings, noting how nice her apartment was. Located in one of the wealthiest neighborhoods in the city, her lodgings were noticeably immaculate, with plush carpets and beautifully patterned wallpaper. The furniture was certainly expensive looking and comfortable, and a single glance into her kitchen showed state-of-the-art appliances and marble counters. He expected no less from the mayor of one of the world's largest cities, though his old flame had always been both stylish and well-mannered. It was one of the things that originally drew him to her.

Mario began to reminisce about old times before his thoughts returned to Princess Peach back home, making him feel guilty that he was alone with another woman. Granted he was not formally involved in a relationship with the kindly monarch, that incident on the moon some time ago reminding him all too well. A fight with Bowser to give her a flower had ended with Peach almost leaving them on the moon. Over the years they had moments here and there, but he found it difficult to refute that her first love would always be the Mushroom Kingdom and its people.

"Here you are." Pauline placed a glass of milk in his hands, snapping him out of his daze. This did not go unnoticed by the brunette. "Oh dear, was I interrupting something?"

He took a sip before setting the drink on a coaster on her coffee table. "Not really. I was just thinkin' about the good old days. Remember when we were just a couple of crazy teenagers growing up in this city."

"Then a certain gorilla came along and carried me into a construction site." she smiled with a nostalgic look.

"Crazy, right?" he agreed.

"Sure it seemed wacky at the time, but we've seen much weirder since then and even before that. If I recall correctly, the planet was actually invaded by aliens when we were both still too young to remember."

"The Shroobs..." Mario shook his head ruefully. Ironically, the only reason the planet had even survived that event was because he and his brother had traveled back in time and teamed up with their baby selves to stop the invasion. Of course, he wasn't keen on sharing this information.

The mayor took a seat in a fluffy blue armchair, her casual red dress complimenting its color. "So, how's he doing these days?" Seeing his confusion, she decided to elaborate. "You know, the ape that kidnapped me."

"Eh, he's still a little bitter about the whole thing." the plumber knew as much, though he hadn't seen the culprit in a while. "Haven't met him in person recently, but Donkey Kong says his dad still talks about us all the time."

"That reminds me..." She rummaged through the draw of her mahogany side table, pulling out an envelope. "I did receive a postcard from the DK Isles last year."

Pauline held it up for him to see. The picture showed a lovely shot of the Kong Family posing together in DK's tree house. Donkey Kong stood in the back row wearing a festive light-up tie, his arms wrapped around a tall curvaceous female Kong that he did not recognize. In front of them were Diddy and Dixie, whom Mario had met a number of times during sporting events. He vaguely recognized a bandana-wearing Kong with sunglasses as Funky, a friend that DK had brought along for one of their kart-racing tournaments. A number of others were also in the photo, though the plumber hadn't met the entire Kong Family and couldn't remember their names. After a moment longer, his eyes slowly gravitated on the elderly bearded ape sitting off to the side in a rocking chair.

"He looks pretty spry for a Kong his age, though he looks kinda angry." was all Mario could muster. The codger had a nasty tendency to gripe about his past defeat. Hardly the foundation for building a friendship with his old rival. "Heard they call him Cranky Kong now. I suppose he earned that name."

"He's not so bad." Pauline reasoned, earning a confused look from her ex. "We've kept in contact since that incident with the Mini Mario toys, and Donkey Kong brought his father for a visit shortly after I became mayor of New Donk City."

"That's a little unexpected... Must've been a weird, seeing him again."

She raised a cup of coffee to her rosy lips and took a good long sip. "Well it was strange at first, but his son turned out to be a good guy. If I can make friends with one Donkey Kong, there's no reason to hold a grudge against his father."

"Well it's not like he didn't have a reason for being upset." the red-clad hero remembered how the feud began. "I was trying to sell a gorilla to the circus back then... At the time I never met a Kong before, and didn't even know they were so smart."

"You're not still upset about him kidnapping me, are you?"

"Of course not. Don't think we'll ever be friends, but I'm fine with the way things are." the plumber smiled challengingly. "The old man's probably the reason Donkey Kong tries so hard to beat me every time we have a sports meet-up. I think he really inherited his father's spirit."

"I see the rivalry continues." Pauline brought a manicured hand to her chin and giggled.

"It's tons of fun having everyone around for the big event! Maybe next time we get together, you can join us."

Her blue eyes settled on the coffee cup in her hands. Pauline would've been happy to meet everyone and spend some time with one of her oldest friends, but life in the city had been hectic lately. Not to mention there was also the matter of a certain princess, and the possibility that her presence could make things awkward. Mario had saved Peach so many times over the years and there was no doubt from the way they talked about each other that the two had some feelings deeper than friendship.

Years ago, she too had been in love with the plumber. He was as kind, brave, and caring a man as anyone could be. Not to mention a part-time doctor, a star athlete, and full-time superhero. Of course Pauline understood why the Mushroom Kingdom's princess liked him so much. Even after so long, the mayor remembered their old relationship as some of the happiest days of her life, and it was partially the inspiration for the song she performed at the city's historic festival. She hadn't had a steady boyfriend since, and to truly sing from the heart, Pauline had written the lyrics to reflect her most precious memories.

The red-clad woman considered him. "Well, my schedule has been rather full since the election. I can't guarantee my attendance. Today's the first day off I've had in a while."

Mario stood up, though his short stature made this barely noticeably, an amusing fact which she never failed to notice. "All the more reason you should come."

"I promise to come so long as it doesn't interfere with my duties as mayor." she reassured him.

"Everyone else would be thrilled to finally meet you. The princess says you made her feel right at home in the Metro Kingdom while she was on that little world tour. I'm sure she'd do the same for you."

The beautiful politician wore a knowing smile. The way his face lit up while talking about this girl made it too obvious. She leaned forward, both hands coming to rest in her lap. "Something tells me she's been on your mind ever since you left the Mushroom Kingdom. Am I right?"

"We've been friends for so long, it's only natural I'd be concerned. Especially since bad guys are always kidnappin' her. If it isn't Bowser's weekly kidnapping attempts, it's some other creep tryin' to take over the world. Mama Miya! I could tell a million stories if you want. One time, she even got her voice stolen by some crazy witch, and we had to... ... ..."

"Friendship is wonderful, but you can't be afraid to push the envelope a little farther." Pauline cut him off mid-story, startling the plumber.

The plumber tapped his finger together, looking uncharacteristically bashful. "Well, I... ... What exactly do you mean?"

"I may not be lucky in love, but I know what it looks like. Go ahead and make a move..." she paused maddeningly, her guest falling momentarily silent. "She's worth it!"

Mario sat back in his own chair, again going over the flower incident in his head. Sure Bowser was present and both of them were pushing to charm her at the same time. It was natural the princess wouldn't be thrilled after literally escaping an unwanted wedding to one of the males who was beckoning her, but Mario still felt a little hurt by her rejection. She had quite literally walked past him without even a glance. Things had returned to normal by the time they returned to the Mushroom Kingdom, but it did make him stomach feel unsettled.

"I'm not sure if that's what she wants..." the plumber finally answered, silently stroking his mustache with uncertainty.

Pauline remained positive. "Then find out." she pressed him.

"I'm happy with the way things are now. No need to rush things, especially if she doesn't wanna talk about it" he stated adamantly.

She sighed in defeat, knowing full well he wasn't going to seize the subject again. "You never do put your feelings first."

Mario was the stubborn type, never giving up on anything. Literally willing to do whatever he could to help others and tackle any challenge no matter how difficult. If only he was as invested in romance as he was everything else.

Silence lingered for a moment, only to be interrupted by a loud rumbling noise. "By the way, a certain mayor promised we'd get somethin' tasty for dinner. What're we having?" The plumber gave his rotund stomach a gentle pat.

Despite her previous thoughts, Pauline couldn't help but find humor in the statement. "You never change, do you?" she surmised, the two old friends sharing a small laugh as she readied her coat and purse for the night out.

-Next Morning- Bowser's Kingdom...

Bowser's Castle was simply humming with activity today as his minions prepared for the missions in store. Hammer Bros. were at work training in the East Gardens, practicing their jumping skills over the moat of poison water while performing maneuvers with their hammers, each soldier honing their skills to the max. The unit commander was a foul-tempered guy simply known as the "Army Hammer Bro" by his subordinates. While he wore black gear and a helmet with tiny horns, he was hardly stronger than his soldiers and only gained rank by earning the master's favor.

"You call that a hammer toss!? My granny could've thrown it farther than that!" he barked, earning a collective groan from the troops.

In the West Gardens, four Koopa Troopas wearing ninja masks and matching bandanas were busy instructing their fellow soldiers on the value of teamwork. The notorious Koopa Bros. had once been favored by Bowser for their awesome combo attacks, but had since been regulated to drill duty since failing to protect a kidnapped Star Spirit from Mario.

Meanwhile, the lower grounds reserved for aerial forces had been particularly busy this morning, The minions were bustling about in preparation for their leader's newest scheme. A large number of armor-clad Koopatrols and Shy Guys were stockpiling ammunition and loading the Airships with new weapons in case they were ordered to attack, knowing that lack of preparation would only make the boss angry.

The sound of several marching feet diverted their attention, the doors to the flight control platform opening to reveal several Magikoopas standing at the ready. A quartet of blue garbed wizards stood at the front of the group, followed by about two-dozen more wearing robes of several different colors. It was a parade of blue, green, red, yellow, gray, and white. While the spell casters were known as some of the Koopa Troop's most elite members, it was rare to see such a large number of them in one place.

"What's going on?" One of the Shy Guys muttered to a nearby Goomba, the angry mushroom shaking his head with confusion. Before anyone else could ask, the hulking form of their lord and master thrust open the opposite door, followed by his wizened advisor, Kammy Koopa.

"I think it's starting..." a random Hammer Bro commented.

Bowser stomped towards them and roared. "Does everyone know where they need to go?" he asked, looking pleased when no one answered. "Good! Now get lost and don't come back until the job is done!"

"And if you mess up, don't bother coming back here!" the old crone screamed, drops of spit flew from her wrinkled snaggle-toothed mouth, much to the disgust of the troops.

"Put a sock in it, hag woman!" the Koopa King yelled dismissively before addressing a slightly hunched Magikoopa clad in white trimmed blue robes. "Is the unit ready for takeoff?"

"Hold on." Kamek let out a low grunt before facing the crowd. "Stand at attention!" he raised his wand high in the air and did a small pirouette, causing a broomstick to appear in his opposite hand.

This action prompted the other sorcerers to do the same, earning a satisfied look from Bowser. The monstrous tyrant leaned down beside the much smaller Koopa so that he could speak to him in private. "I'm counting on you to make sure nothing goes wrong."

"If something bad happens, I'll make sure to handle it personally." the old wizard responded, earning a approving grunt from his superior.

Bowser pulled a remote control from behind his back, pressing a button to open the hanger doors. "For the glory of the Koopa Kingdom!" he shouted, throwing both fists in the air.

His minions applauded loudly as the ceiling parted, revealing the stark red skies of Bowser's Kingdom. The Magikoopa division mounting their brooms amidst the joyous chorus. Kamek took off into the air, sparks of red energy flying dramatically from his wand. "LET'S RIDE!" he shouted.

Another cheer erupted as the rest of the wizards followed suit, the flock of broom-riders rising as one before scattering to the winds and away to parts unknown. Each held their wands aloft, casting large balls of fire, which exploded into brilliantly colored sparks that lingered long after they had gone. The celebration continued until long after they were out of sight, ending with a chorus of deep laughter from the Koopa King himself. The greatest scheme ever had begun...

-The Next Day- Kitchen Island

On an island far from the rest of civilization, a band of notorious pirates known as the Black Sugar Gang made their home. It was a large mass of land home to several different landscapes, including volcanoes, frozen tundra, and dry desserts. Atop the highest mountains stood an ominous tower held in place by pillars, its highest turret shaped like a human skull. Despite being a pirate, the island's ruler was a step above most buccanneers, having amassed enough treasure to afford the finest luxuries and a small fleet of ships.

Docked off the coast of the island was a large pirate ship known as The Sweet Stuff, decorated in gold leaf and inlaid with gemstones, its captain sitting at the helm with a treasure map in her hand. Despite her nasty reputation, Kitchen Island's ruler lacked the look of a thug. Captain Syrup was a human woman with developed curves and alluring eyes, standing taller than Princess Peach with beauty to match. She wore blue eyeliner and red lipstick complimenting her fair skin and had long bushy red hair, the latter running halfway down her back. She wore a pink top and royal purple pants, completing the look with a red belt, skull-shaped buckle, and sailing boots.

The captain tucked away the map as her minions lowered the ramp to the dock. "All hands, transport the treasure to the castle vault!" she commanded.

Several little creatures emerged from the cargo hold, carrying crates of valuables. While they resembled Goombas, her chestnut-shaped Pirate Gooms wore red bandanas and lacked the stem-like bodies of their cousins, though they possessed stubby arms and mitten-like hands which allowed slightly more versatility.

A trio of Gooms stood by her side, the miniscule minions serving as her personal staff. One of them looked slightly nervous and it didn't sit well with her. "What's the matter!? Why're you moping instead of celebrating your captain's good fortune?"

"One treasure ship we fill looted by fat plumber man. You not be upset?" he answered.

"Don't worry about him... That hideous Wario will get his comeuppance soon enough! Especially if he has the nerve of coming back here."

"Last time he invade island, we loose everything." the Pirate Goom shifted uneasily.

In all honesty this also bothered the captain. During their first encounter with the greedy anti-hero, Wario had managed to hospitalize her strongest lieutenants, and steal even the most priceless artifacts. This was especially irritating since they had hidden the most valuable treasures in places no ordinary person would look. To make matters worse, the Black Sugar Gang's attempts to steal back everything had resulted in the remainder of their loot being taken. Of course, more recent events in the mysterious Shake Dimension had gone quite differently.

"Wario make trouble for us again?" the Goom repeated.

"Don't forget, the last time we met I managed to nab the best treasure right out from beneath his giant nose. He's not nearly greedy enough to seriously compete with the likes of me." Captain Syrup slapped her knee and laughed. "In fact, I intend to take everything from that pest when the time is right."

Dreaming of the endless wealth she could obtain, she barely noticed the familiar beating of wings in the distance, raising her head only when a loud thud sounded behind her. The female pirate spun, catching sight of her most loyal subordinate. Standing behind her was a yellow-breasted purple parrot with a skull tattooed on his chest. Fearsome and large, the flying menace towered at least seven feet tall, his wings powerful enough to induce hurricane force winds with a rapid flapping motion.

"Hello Bobo... Miss your captain so much that you couldn't wait to greet her?"

"Of course!" The bird clicked his back several times before squawking "You have a visitor back at the castle, Miss Syrup."

This surprised the pirate, who raised an eyebrow in response. "Who would possibly demand an audience with me?" She had actually planned to set sail again rather than return home. Treasure wouldn't steal itself. "I have more important things to do. Tell whoever it is they can feel free to leave immediately!"

"Tried already, but he refuses. Gave me this to deliver to you." Bobo held out his foot, allowing her to take the piece of paper tied to his leg.

"Really!? The nerve of this guy! No one makes demands of me on my own turf." she replied dismissively before seizing the scroll.

"It's some guy from the Koopa Kingdom... Says it's really important, and he won't leave unless you give him an answer."

Captain Syrup unfurled the paper, her eyes widening in surprise when she saw the Bowser-shaped crest. She tore it in half with an irritated look before reluctantly nodding her head, "Tell him that I will return to my palace, soon."

"Yes ma'am..." the gargantuan parrot lowered his head before taking to the air, a purple cascade of feathers floating behind him.

"This had better be worth it." she hissed, earning frightened looks from her Gooms.

-Meanwhile- Evershade Valley

On the edge of a ghostly settlement stood a small manor house, a resting place where Boos lived away from the disgustingly peaceful ghosts that dwelt deeper in the canyon. Today was a special night for the evil inhabitants, as they were also holding a meeting similar to the one Bowser had the previous night. The main hall of the mansion consisted of a run-down parlor with old furniture and dusty tables, but the ghosts didn't care much for the use of such things, instead opting to float above it all.

King Boo bore his sharp teeth, his red eyes and eerie body shining in the perpetual glow provided by the Dark Moon. "All right men, someone had to have an idea." he glanced back and forth at his henchmen, who remained silent accept for the occasional cackle.

"Well, the last plan didn't exactly turn out so good." A pale Boo tilted slightly in midair before noticing the boss's frown and quickly got to the point. "The boys and I figured we could just take a break and enjoy ourselves for a while."

"Yeah, good idea!" a second Boo dared to say.

"Quitters!? That's what's become of the tough, 'scary' ghosts that I picked to be my minions!" he spat incredulously. "C'mon you morons! A plan for revenge against the Mario Bros. isn't just gonna come bursting through that door!"

Suddenly the nearby window shattered, a red shape planting headfirst into the wooden floor of the foyer. One of the Boos floated over to inspect as a red-robed Magikoopa crawled out from under the remains of the couch. He looked around at the ghosts, some looking annoyed, while the the others appearing as if they were quite enjoying his misfortune.

The newcomer straightened his glasses. "I, uh... I came to see the king."

King Boo floated over to the uninvited guest, his ruby crown glistening. "Yeah, what's Bowser want from us this time?"

"I was sent to deliver a message." The Magikoopa handed him an envelope, the ghost monarch tearing it open ad reading it.

"Hmmm... Interesting... ..." King Boo replied as he finished reading. He turned to his compatriots, all of which had gathered around closer in anticipation. "All right boys, looks like we got some solid plans for this weekend!"

A nearby Boo snickered. "And you said a plan wouldn't come bursting through the door."

"It was the window, you dunce!" he quipped, letting out a low-pitched laugh that sent chills down the spines of his enemies.

-Meanwhile- Moon Kingdom

The ruined chapel the Broodals had worked so hard to built was large abadoned, but the settlement on Dark Side of the Moon remained relatively untouched. On the first floor of the large rabbit tower, the evil wedding planners stood crowded around their beloved leader, a morbidly obese monster-sized rabbit wearing a red dress and heavy makeup. It had been mere weeks since Bowser's bone-brained plans had gone awry, and the bad press was bound to ruin their business.

Madame Broode glared down at the yellow-robed Magikoopa standing at her feet, her precious Broodals standing quietly on both sides of the room. "A gathering of bad guys?" she repeated, earning a small nod from the visitor. "And he would like us to attend?"

"That is what King Bowser said... Everyone on the guest list is invited to his castle this weekend for a big bad guy convention."

"After what happened so short a time ago, I'd rather not see that man again. My little poopsie is still recovering from his lost battle. Aren't you my adorable sweet." the gargantuan woman reeled in the chain of her companion, stroking Chain Chompikins like an obedient dog.

The green top-hat wearing Broodal frowned. "I gotta agree... Except for the part about the Mistress's pet." He added, jumping back as the golden Chomp snapped its jaws in his direction. "Aye, personal space, pal!"

"For shame, Topper. Spurning the affections of my precious pet! That gesture just means he likes you."

"That's fine and all, but I'd rather not be dinner!" he began cautiously backing away from the monster's teeth.

Harriet shuffled back and forth as if resisting the urge to dance. "Why should we care about this party, anyway?"

"This bad guy expo is supposed to be the biggest event for villains ever held! We need someone to do the planning, and who better than you guys?" the Magikoopa pleaded.

Madame Broode stroked her muzzle thoughtfully before grinning. "We'll consider it... But it'll cost you about 500,000 coins, notwithstanding the cost for the requisite materials and the compulsory tips we expect with every single service."

The Magikoopa shifted uneasily. "Well... we... ... um... ... ..."

"Spit it out!" she hollered, violently rattling her pet's chain.

"We were thinking... Y'know... ... Since you messed up the last time we hired you, that you'd be willing to perform the services for free."

"Free!?" the red-clad woman's eye twitched dangerously. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN, FREE!?"

He took a few steps back. "Well King Bowser was promised a perfect wedding to Princess Peach. Not only was it far from perfect, but everything you planned DID go through the roof. We... I mean to say HE... thinks you should be willing to... ..."

"Why you little maggot!" Madame Broode stood up from her seat, the room rocking as she took each step closer to him. "How dare you barge into MY kingdom and make demands. Why I should stomp footprints into that tiny face of yours!"

The Broodals Rango and Spewart dashed forward, trying to hold back their rampaging leader. "Hold on, miss! Ya can't go round attacking potential clients."

"Did you hear his demands!?" she hissed, picking up the lanky Rango by his collar and shaking him violently.

While the bouncer was too busy struggling against her grip, Spewart the entertainer leapt onto her shoulder and whispered. "Y'know boss, there are some benefits to doing this for free. At least listen to me before you strangle the poor man."

Madame Broode glanced back and forth between the terrified rabbit and the one on her shoulder and slowly lowered her victim to the floor. She allowed the other Broodal to climb down before bending over beside him. "What do you have in mind?"

"You heard the Koopa-dude. He says this might be the biggest gathering of villains in one place ever." he let out a high-pitched chuckle. "Don't forget who the client base for evil event planning is?"

"Oh, I see... You're saying we'll be stuck in a room with potential clients."

Spewart nodded. "Yeah, and if we do a good job planning this bad guy convention, the demands for our services will skyrocket! Every lowdown tyrant, thief, or thug will practically be begging for our services if they get to see our skills in action!"

"Hahahaha, I get it!" she laughed heartily before turning to face their guest, her eyes practically turning into coins. "All right little fella. You tell the boss he can count us in."

"Really!?" the Magikoopa looked relieved at how quickly the situation had turned around, even though he hadn't heard a word whispered between the rabbits. "You have to be there a couple of days early to handle the planning.

"We'll be there with bells on!" Topper tipped his signature hat, his fellow Broodals snickering evilly behind him.

-Meanwhile- A Haunted Swamp

Somewhere in the farthest reaches of the world, a dreary bog festered with the worst kinds of wildlife. Bacteria filled its still waters while long dead trees floated aimlessly and snakes and diseased vermin crept about, making whatever life they could muster amidst the ruined land. In spite of the unpleasant atmosphere, it was strangely fitting for the main inhabitants of this inhospitable dump.

On the edge of the swamp stood a heavily deteriorated castle, built from aging stone and boasting broken windows and even some collapsed segments of roof. Perhaps it was structurally unsafe, but those who settled within had no right to be picky. The rundown fortress was home to a crew of anthropomorphic crocodilians known as the Kremlings, a race of bipedal Crocodiles famous for their inbred cruelty and general unpleasantness. The 'Kremling Krew' were best known as the archenemies of Donkey Kong and his friends, but after several bitter defeats and the destruction of Crocodile Isle by the apes, they had been left in squander and their resources badly depleted.

Deep in the bowels of the crumbling stronghold, a particularly large green Kremling slept upon a metallic throne, snoring loudly with both hands resting on his round yellow stomach. His pointy golden crown was slightly askew, the headpiece rattling as he breathed in and out.

The room was rather unimpressive for a king's audience chamber. Portraits of the Kremling leader wearing a variety of different outfits hung from the walls, though they were discolored from age, and the frames chipped and scratched. The presence of cobwebs indicated the room had not been cleaned in some time, and the candles protruding from the walls were unlit. The room was adorned with a grand red carpet, albeit faded and badly stained.

Without warning, the aging wooden doors creaked open, a fat tan-skinned Kremling wearing an ammunition belt and army helmet waddling into the room quickly as his pudgy legs would carry him. "King K. Rool sir, we have news!" he screamed.

The evil tyrant bolted upright, his left eye bulging and bloodshot. "Are we under attack!?"

"Um... no... ..." the soldier stammered, still trying to catch his breath.

This answer only made him angry. "You half-witted cretin! Didn't I explicitly order you NOT to bother me unless it was an emergency!?"

"Well, yeah... You sorta did... But I really think you should..."

"General Klump, you massive waste of brain-matter!" the Kremling King thundered, causing his loyal henchman to sink back in fear.

"Apologies sir, but it wasn't my fault. We kinda have a guest, and I didn't want to..."

"Just shut up!" his boss interrupted, taking a moment to rub his temples. He took a deep breath before screaming at the top of his lungs. "GO AWAAAAAAAAAYYY!"

His subordinate stumbled, landing on his behind. "Guess you're gonna have to go home." he called over his shoulder.

"This gentleman was kind enough to escort me here. My superior was hoping you would consent to meet with me." an unfamiliar voice addressed the tyrant.

King K. Rool caught the site of small creature wearing green robes, who had been standing behind the dim-witted general. He vaguely recognized the visitor as a type of Koopa, though the species wasn't common around here, and the interruption of his afternoon nap left the evil ruler in a less than hospitable mood.

His large eye popped slightly as he addressed the Magikoopa. "And who in blazes are you?"

Note to Readers: Well, that's the first chapter. If you would like to see more, drop me a REVIEW. If you want to see a certain character or setting used, please tell me. Inspiration and motivation are what keeps me writing stories.

I've been toying with ideas for this story for quite some time, and the release of Super Mario Odyssey gave me the motivation to give it a shot. I plan on including a ton of characters from the Mario series and other in-universe games like Yoshi's Island, Donkey Kong, Luigi's Mansion, and Wario spinoffs. If you're a Nintendo fan, I think you will enjoy this gigantic tale.

Mario's world is so vast, yet few games really show just how much story takes place in it. Don't think for a second that the villains featured in this chapter will be the only ones to appear... Not even close!

I apologize for any typos, though I try my best to proofread before posting chapters.