Morning Madness

By: Eurazaba

A/N: I don't normally do one-shots (and this will actually eventually be a two-shot) but I wanted to write something for adrininovember and ended up writing this silly little fic. I realized in writing this that Adrien is just like my dad, except for the swearing and the panicking, that's me.

Warning for some nudity but it's really not that bad.

Tell me what you think!

Half past 3 in the morning, Nino found himself standing in front of his apartment door fumbling around with his cluster-fuck keys as quietly as he could in order to find the correct one. The silence of the building was deafening compared to the traffic of the streets and his keys sounded like a bulldozer in the silence. Finally, he found the right one and jammed the key inside the door and entered, tired and eager to curl up in bed with his husband.

A singular light was left on for him, barely illuminating the room, but giving enough light that Nino could guide his way around the messy area. He kicked off his shoes and haphazardly tossed his jacket on to one of the wall hooks covered in jackets. Turning off the light left for him and pulling out his phone to use the flashlight, he shuffled over to the bedroom. There, Nino saw Adrien, collapsed onto the bed and still dressed in his day clothes, even still wearing his shoes, Nino sighed, another long day. Their cat, Seraphina, was curled up on Adrien's back, content with her position. Nino ran his hand over her back, waking her up with a little "prrt", however when he guided his light over to her he saw something else.

There, wrapped up in Seraphina's white and brown body was what looked to be a little, black kitten.

It barely moved as Nino shined his light over it, only twitching a closed eye, it was alive. Nino leaned down to get a closer look at the kitten. It was a tiny thing, no bigger than the palm of his hand Nino guessed, he reached a finger out to pet its little head, the kitten leaned into the touch.

Where did they come from? Nino thought, turning the light towards Seraphina's face more, she squinted at the light and let out a quiet meow. Seraphina was known to bring things into the apartment, always managing to kill a small bird or drag a mouse she found from the next block over all the way back to their apartment. She was quite the little killer, but she never brought another cat, much less a kitten, back. Nino looked over to where Adrien's face was pushed into his pillow, letting out quiet breaths, he wouldn't put it past Adrien to randomly adopt a stray without consulting him first, that's how they ended up with Seraphina in the first place. Yet it was odd how content she seemed, curled up with this little kitten, she didn't get along well with other cats.

He set his phone on the side board with the light facing up to dimly illuminate the room before scooping up the kitten from Seraphina and holding it up to look over it. What he saw was rather disturbing, the kitten's head was rather bulbous compared to the rest of its body, has it been crushed? Had the kitten been born like this? He wasn't sure, but he worried if it would actually be able to survive. Based on its size he guessed it couldn't be more than a week old, the kitten was a tiny thing, likely the runt of it litter. As if to defy him, the kitten yawned and opened its eyes, bright greens peered back at him and the kitten froze.

It was as if the kitten was startled at seeing him. Seraphina had gotten up and was pushed against his leg, eager to have the kitten back with her. Nino ignored her and looked over the kitten more, two strange whiskers came from its cheeks and a third came out of the top of its head, that didn't seem right. The kitten continued staring at him, Nino sighed, it was too late in the night for him to ponder this little kitten, he could ask Adrien about it when he woke up. Hoping it had been fed, Nino walked over to the cat bed that Seraphina never used, said cat hot on his trail, and placed the kitten in it. Seraphina gave him a dirty look, hesitating before finally climbing into bed and curling around the kitten once again, the kitten relaxed and slowly closed it eyes.

Nino walked over to where Adrien still lay, completely undisturbed by the moment on his back. Nino pulled off Adrien's shoes and tossed them to the side before pulling his feet up onto the bed, not bothering to take of Adrien's clothes. As gently as he could, Nino pulled the blankets out from under Adrien and flopped them over him. Adrien sighed and curled into the blankets more without waking, he could sleep through the apocalypse if he really wanted to. Nino rolled his eyes, putting away his phone and getting himself ready for bed before pulling back the covers and curling up with Adrien for the night.

Nino awoke to an empty bed and Seraphina curled up on his face, nothing new, but he could do without the fur all over him. He pushed her off, the sudden sunlight making him squint, and ran a hand over his face. Slowly he sat up, rubbing his eyes before reaching for his glasses. Seraphina rubbed into his side signaling that she wanted him to pet her.

"Yeah, yeah, you only want my attention when Adrien isn't around," Nino said climbing out of bed and stretching. It was a quarter to noon, a good time to wake up, Adrien would be back from his morning shift for lunch soon. Nino freshened up in the bathroom before heading to the kitchen, Seraphina happily trailing behind him.

Something about that was bothering him in the back of his mind, he couldn't quite recall what. He began pulling out ingredients, Seraphina watching him from one of the counter stools as he thought over what he was forgetting. Seraphina, she was following him around but there was supposed to be something else she had, did she bring another dead mouse inside? Stars he did not want to clean that up.

Nino almost dropped the pan he had when he remembered the kitten from last night. He shoved everything aside and looked over at Seraphina, she didn't have the kitten with her. He rushed back to their room, the kitten wasn't in the cat bed, it wasn't on his and Adrien's bed, it wasn't anywhere in the room. He searched the rest of the apartment, the kitten was nowhere to be found. Nino turned accusatorily towards Seraphina who remained in the same place and lied down, not particularly interested in his searching game.

"Where did they go?" He asked her.

She twitched and ear and tilted her head at him.

"Where did the kitten go Seraphina, did you hide them?"

She meowed back at him, Nino sighed rubbing his hand over his face, the cat wouldn't be of any help. He really didn't know what to do, but Adrien would know hopefully, Nino went back to the kitchen to start the food to distract himself.

An hour passed before Adrien showed up, and Nino was just about done cooking.

"You know, cooking naked is dangerous, something hot could pop up and burn you," Adrien said giving Nino a kiss on the cheek and hanging up his coat, Seraphina was right by his side.

"I'd wear an apron, but you're the one who bought it," Nino said in reference to the obnoxiously bright apron Adrien bought with an ugly graphic of a cat and the absolute worst pun printed on the front of it, Nino refused to wear it and Adrien always looked like a doofus when he wore it.

"Aww come on, that apron is the pinnacle of humor," Adrien smiled, setting out silverware and sitting down at the table as Nino served them the food he made.

"I beg to differ, Marinette and Alya beg to differ, the world begs to differ," Nino deadpanned, earning a laugh from Adrien.

"Every once in a while, I manage to get a laugh out of you with my humor," Adrien said taking a bite, he praised Nino for the food.

"If by every once in a while you mean "twice in our entire time of knowing each other", then yes."

"So I take it you didn't marry me for my humor," Adrien joked.

"Stars above no! If I married you for your humor I wouldn't have the social life I do now," Nino laughed.

"Harsh Nino, are you saying my jokes drive people away?" Adrien asked.

"I'm saying that Alya and Marinette wouldn't have dinner with us as frequently if I wasn't there to stop you when you're "on a roll" of jokes, and in turn stopping them from rolling their eyes out of their heads," Nino responded with his own eye roll.

Adrien put his hand on his chest in mock hurt, but didn't lose the smile on his face, "Then why did you marry me?"

"Oh a variety of reasons, you're sweet, you're a giant nerd," Nino began, Adrien giving him a look with a smirk but eager to see what else he would say, "You're caring, though, so caring that you decide to bring in stray cats without asking me first because you just can't stand to send them to the shelter."

"Oh come on! That was one time! And besides, Seraphina loves you, and I know you love her," Adrien pointed his fork at Nino accusatorily, said Seraphina having rested on Adrien's feet.

"And the kitten from last night?" Nino asked, curious as to why Adrien didn't mention them.

"The what?"

"The kitten from last night," Nino emphasized, "I came home last night and there was a kitten curled up with Seraphina on your back."

The confused look on Adrien's face let Nino know that he didn't actually know what Nino was talking about.

"There was this little black kitten, it had this, this really big head, like uncomfortably large compared to its body, and these bright green eyes. And, it seemed like it was too small, too young, to have its eyes open," Nino explained, watching as a slow realization crossed Adrien's face and his eyes grow wider and wider, "And it had to whiskers on the side of its face and one weird one that seemed to come out of its head."

Adrien stared at Nino with wide eyes and his mouth open, he knew what Nino was talking about, why was he so shocked by this.

"You've seen them?" Nino confirmed.

The speed at which Adrien wiped the shocked expression off his face and replaced it with a nervous smile could have given someone whiplash.

"What, what, no. I've never heard of something like that-I-I've never seen a cat like that. I have no idea what you're talking about," Adrien began stuttering out, almost tripping over his words.

Nino frowned, Adrien was lying, that much was obvious, he had never been a good liar. What Nino couldn't understand is why Adrien would be lying about something like a cat.

"Are you sure you saw a cat last night? You get home pretty late you know, it could have been something else," Adrien weakly suggested.

"Adrien," Nino said, his husband straightening at the stiffness in his voice, "You don't need to lie about this, it's just a cat, I won't be mad."

"I'm n-I'm not lying, Nino," Adrien insisted.

Nino gave him the most perplexed look, he was really going to keep trying to play it off.

"Adrien, I know you, I know when you're lying, you're a horrendous liar," Adrien gave him a look but Nino continued, "It's a cat, why are you trying to hide it from me? My birthday isn't for another six months if that what it is."

"No, haha, it's not that," Adrien looked to the side, "It's umm… uh…"

He hawed and hemmed trying to think of something, but didn't manage to give any explanation.

"It's nothing, really!" Adrien quickly said when he couldn't think of anything.

Nino narrowed his eyes, it clearly wasn't "nothing" if Adrien tried to deny it at first and couldn't actually give him an explanation, but he decided to let it go for now. Adrien would come forward with the truth eventually, he wasn't good with guilt either.

"If you insist," Nino sighed.

The rest of lunch was spent in uncomfortable silence before Adrien left early for work.

Nino slumped in his chair, looking over at Seraphina, "What could he possibly be hiding? It's just a cat, isn't it?"

Seraphina meowed back at him.

The week had passed awkwardly, Adrien and Nino walking on eggshells whenever they conversed as each tried to avoid talking about the cat. Their monthly dinner with Alya and Marinette had been incredibly uncomfortable, both women having picked up on the unease between Nino and Adrien.

"Alright, what's wrong?" Alya asked, finally breaking the awkwardness between them, "Normally we can't get you two to shut up, and you've barely said a word this whole night."

"It's stupid, really," Adrien said.

"It really is," Nino said, giving Adrien an accusatory glance, "So why don't you just explain it to me."

"I-I don't really think this is the time," Adrien hissed at Nino as Marinette and Alya shared a look.

Nino turned back to the table, he knew Adrien had a point, he rather didn't want to explain that their little feud was due to a cat seen in the night.

"…Listen, we've had fights that seem stupid too," Marinette said, trying to ease the tension between them.

"Like the stuffed toy you keep placing around our apartment to mock me?" Alya asked with a smirk.

"I'm not hiding a stuffed toy around the apartment, I've already told you," Marinette exclaimed.

"Sure, sure it's the ghost haunting our building that's moving the toy around," Alya rolled her eyes but still didn't lose her smile.

"See, it could have been a ghost that you saw," Adrien commented.

"Seraphina wouldn't wrap herself around a ghost, she's smarter than that," Nino bounced back, he knew what he saw, and that didn't explain why Adrien had to lie about it.

"This is the same cat that screamed at us for an hour when a stack of papers fell onto her food bowl and she couldn't find it," Adrien laughed, Nino let out a little chuckle with him, things were still tense between them but they wordlessly decided to push the issue to the side for the night.

The night continued on between the four of them like normal, but once Marinette and Alya left the awkwardness between Adrien and Nino returned. Though it was clouded by the three bottles of wine they all shared, the next morning-noon-whenever they woke up, was a harsh combination of a hangover and the week's continual issues.

As if to mock them, the akuma that appeared at the end of the week while Nino was grocery shopping was cat themed. He stood at the window of the store, watching the fight pass by on the roof of the buildings across from him, Chat Noir and Ladybug moving in a blur of black and red.

Chat Noir was supposed to be a black cat with green eyes, Nino realized with a frown.

He swore when this cat thing did eventually come out it was going to be something completely asinine, Adrien having gotten himself nervous and worked up over nothing. Nino continued with his shopping.

Chat Noir was about ready to scream, of all things, of all the times, the stupid akuma this week just had to be cat themed! He swore Papillon was mocking him.

When the blasted akuma had finally been purified Chat Noir did let out a scream.

"Are you okay?" Ladybug asked from beside him on the roof.

"Yeah, fine, fine, I just… Auugh," Chat managed out, rubbing his hands over his eyes.

"Auugh?" Ladybug repeated back, knowing that he was more articulate than that.

"So you know the kwami thing I told you about a couple of day ago on patrol, with my husband seeing my kwami after I passed out when we were done with the midnight akuma?"

"Oh, yeah, has it gotten worse?"

"No, no, not really, things have just been really awkward between us," Chat ran his hands over his face, looking over at Ladybug, "No, it just, my kwami looks like a cat, so my husband thinks I'm lying to him about a cat, and the stupid akuma just had to be a crazy cat lady just to rub it in my face."

Ladybug laughed.

"That's quite some bad luck with timing," She chuckled, Chat Noir frowned at her, "Look, look I know this seems bad, but it'll blow over, and you'll be able to joke about it like me and my wife do."

"Something about a ghost?" Chat asked, remembering when Ladybug told him a similar situation between her and her wife a few months ago.

"I mean, I'm pretty sure our building is haunted, so it's easy to play it off as such," Her earrings beeped, "Just, give it some time."

"I'll try," Chat sighed, he needed a shower, "I'll see you next week for patrols."

"See ya," She responded, both of them heading home.

Nino came home, his arms full of grocery's and his head filled with thoughts of cats. The sound of the shower from the next room could be heard from where he stood at the front door, good, he needed a little more time alone to clear his head before he and Adrien go back to their mess. He closed the door, shoved his keys in his pocket, and looked up.

There, in the middle of the kitchen, was a cat.

…The cat.

…The kitten.

It was flying.

It was flying!

Without thinking, Nino started screaming, dropping half of the grocery's he had.

The cat, the kitten, it was in his apartment, it was flying in his apartment! What the fuck!?

The kitten remained frozen, staring at him with wide eyes and unsure of what to do and still flying in his star-forsaken kitchen! Nino barely caught the sound of a loud thud coming from the bathroom over his screaming, Seraphina running from her place on the couch to the bedroom in a panic. A few seconds later, Adrien came running out, sopping wet and holding the metal bat they kept in case of intruders.

"WHAT, WHAT!? WHAT'S WRONG!?" Adrien yelled out swinging the bat over his head, Nino's screaming had barely stopped.

Adrien's eye went wide when they landed on the kitten.

"IT'S THE KITTEN! IT'S THE FUCKING KITTEN I SAW! ADRIEN WHAT THE FUCK IS IT DOING? WHY IS IT FLYING, WHAT THE FUCK!" Nino screamed, pointing wildly at the flying kitten.

Adrien stood frozen, the bat still posed above his head and eyes still wide as he looked from Nino to the flying kitten. The kitten started to move and on instinct Nino dropped the rest of grocery's he had and quickly grabbed the flying kitten.

"What the fuck?" Nino yelled again, holding the thing in his hands, its green eyes wide and staring at him like he was a mad man, "Adrien, what the fuck, what-"

Adrien was suddenly right in front of him, shoving a wet hand over Nino's mouth to silence him.

"S-shut the fuck up for a moment, stars above!" Adrien hissed out looking over to the wall where some of their neighbors were, they knew Alya and Marinette, their neighbors on one side, and Nino and Adrien knew that they were out on a date right now and wouldn't hear them. However they barely knew their neighbors on their other side.

There was thumping from their neighbors, "What the fuck are you yelling about? Some people are trying to read here!"

"S-sorry, thought we saw a giant bug! F-false alarm!" Adrien yelled back at the neighbors. Nino glared at him.

"False alarm!?" Nino hissed back at him, having pulled away from Adrien's hand, "You call this thing," He wasn't sure if he wanted to call it a kitten anymore, "I'm holding in my hands a false alarm?!"

"I'd rather not be called a thing," It said from Nino's hands.

Had it not been for the neighbors, Nino would have started screaming again.

It talked, it fucking talked!

"Adrien Agreste-Lahiffe I swear to the fucking stars above if you don't tell me what the fuck this flying, talking cat-thing that I'm holding in my hands is, and how you know what it is and why it was flying in the middle of our kitchen, I'm going to take that bat out of your hands and kill it," Nino hissed trying to keep his voice down. He didn't hear it say "no you're not," in response as he waited for Adrien's explanation.

"W-well, uh… you-you see…" Adrien couldn't look him in the eyes, instead electing to stare at the whatever still in Nino's hands as he fumbled around for something to say.

"I think at this point its better telling him, than trying your poor excuse of avoiding the subject," The thing spoke up again, speaking directly to Adrien.

"But she's gonna kill me when she finds out he knows," Adrien hissed back.

By how low Adrien's voice was, Nino figured he wasn't supposed to hear that, but his blood froze when he did.

"She who?" He whispered, his voice barely audible and dripping with venom.

"You don't have to actually tell her that he knows," The thing responded nonchalantly, Nino almost squeezed its head off.

Adrien looked in an utter panic at Nino's reaction, his eyes desperately searching everywhere for some kind of an answer.

"Adrien," Nino growled.

Adrien looked down at the bat still in his hands, squeezing it hard. He let out the shakiest breath Nino had ever seen from him.

"Ladybug?" He offered in the tiniest voice, the word had been uttered in a tone several octaves above Adrien's normal speaking voice.

Nino nearly did a double take. Of all the answers that was not the one he was expecting.

"Wha-"

"Fuck, look, this is going to sound really stupid, fucking, this is really stupid, but just, hear me out, okay?" Adrien said, the words pouring out him faster than he could actually get them out. Again he looked to the sides, anywhere but at Nino, and took a deep breath, "I'm… I'm Chat Noir."

Nino almost didn't catch what he said, the words were so quiet, but he did, and he couldn't wrap his mind around what they meant.

"What!?" He squeaked out.

"I'm, Chat Noir, and, that's Plagg," Adrien pointed to the thing in Nino's hands, it acknowledged the name with a little "hey" before phasing through Nino's hands and floating up beside Adrien. Nino stumbled back, almost tripping over the groceries on the ground behind him, "He's my kwami, and how I get my powers to be Chat Noir. Well him and my miraculous, or are you considered the miraculous too?"

Adrien turned to the kwami as he rambled and held up his hand to show off the ring on his hand. The same ring he insisted for years was a family heirloom but Nino for the life of him could never fucking understand why he wore it everywhere he went, particularly in the shower, wouldn't it tarnish? But if was some kind of magical item that gave powers to be, be Chat Noir?! He didn't understand.

"Adrien, wait-what?" Nino breathed out, barely able to speak as his mind went a million miles an hour.

"Listen I know this is a lot to take in, but, I mean, you obviously weren't supposed to find out, and fuck, this is such a mess, and I just, I didn't want you to be angry at me, and I didn't want to lie to you about all of this, but you-you have to understand that that I can't tell anyone about this," Adrien said, the words flying out of his mouth without pause, "You know, this whole being a super hero, being Chat Noir, it, it has all these dangers associated with it and I can't just let you know about this big huge secret, you're not supposed to know, no one's supposed to know, Ladybug doesn't even know, and fuck, Plagg she's going to kill me when she finds out he knows, I know you said she doesn't have to but I just know she's going to find a way to figure it out and I-"

"Shut up!" The Plagg yelled out.

Adrien and Nino stopped and looked up at him.

"Stars above you two are a complete mess, shut up, sit down , and take a moment to breath before you begin talking about this," The Plagg looked between them as he talked, Nino still wasn't used to a very human voice coming for this very animal looking… creature, what did Adrien call it again?

"You're right Plagg," Adrien said, his voice still high, "You're very much right, correct, right, right you are."

"Adrien," The Plagg creature said, rolling his eyes.

"Towel," Nino blurted out, now acutely aware that Adrien was still mostly wet and that his hair was still covered with suds, "You need a towel."

Adrien slumped and nodded in agreement, "And an ice pack likely, I slipped in the shower when you started screaming and I think I pulled something."

"Right, right," Nino responded, not quite grasping the whole of his words as he went to the bathroom to grab some towels for Adrien, following the puddles of water Adrien left on the ground.

He grabbed a couple of towels and found Adrien standing awkwardly in their living room, not wanting to get the couch wet, the bat he was holding, now leaning against the counter. Nino handed one towel to Adrien, who quickly wrapped it around his shoulders with a shiver, and set the other on the couch for him to sit. Nino filled a plastic bag with ice in the kitchen and handed it Adrien, who put it on his hip, before he sat down next to him. The Plagg creature zipped over to the fridge and came back to settle on their dining table and watch them with a small piece of camembert in its… paws.

"Okay, okay, let's… start from the beginning," Nino said, Adrien nodded, "You're Chat Noir."

"Yes."

"You're Chat Noir."

Adrien laughed lightly, "As hard as it is to believe, yes, I am."

"I just, sorry this is a lot to suddenly take in," Nino shook his head, running his fingers through his hair.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry, I kinda just, dumped a whole bunch of information on you like that, I was nervous," Adrien gave a weak smile.

"I just, you're Chat Noir, you've always been Chat Noir," Nino repeated, still disbelieving despite the… odd, evidence given to him.

"I have, ever since… well ever since we met," Adrien said thinking on the memory, "I got the Miraculous the day we met."

Nino let out a shaky laugh, "Your Miraculous, that silly ring you wear everywhere, even in the shower, and insisted was a family heirloom."

"Yeah that one," Adrien said, running his hand over the ring on his finger, "You know, akuma can attack at any time, gotta be ready for anything, and keep it on me at all times in case someone tries to steal it."

Nino let out another small chuckle, shaking his head, "And that thing-"

"Not a thing," The Plagg creature said as Nino pointed to him.

"Plagg," Nino corrected, "What did you call him?"

"A kwami," Adrien supplied.

"Right, right, that …kwami, this Plagg, he's like… like your familiar right?"

"Something like that. When I ask-"

"Demand," Plagg interjected.

"-him to transform me he gets sucked into the ring and I become Chat Noir, my powers come from him mostly," Adrien explained.

"Hmm, that's right, I deserve more credit for what I do, or at least more cheese," Plagg said eating the cheese he had in one frightening bite.

"He's kind of a shitty familiar," Adrien whispered.

Nino laughed at that while Plagg glared at them from where he sat.

"I just, this is so wild, so many things make sense now," Nino exclaimed, "You running off every time an akuma appears, coming home late at random time. Stars above, the reason you purr! I've been trying to figure that one out for years! And you know, it's a hard thing to ask someone!"

"You could hear that?" Adrien asked with an embarrassed blush.

"Of course I could, when you're pressed against me it's kinda hard not hear it and feel it vibrating against my back," Nino confirmed, "And just, so many things make sense, like, he's the reason you always smelled like camembert, right?"

"Unfortunately," Adrien responded with a wrinkle of his nose.

"Hey, Camembert isn't that bad of a smell," Nino said, Adrien looking at him like he was crazy.

"I'll eat to that!" Plagg agreed, another piece of cheese having mysteriously appeared in his grasp before inhaling it.

"Hey, don't eat all our cheese now!" Adrien chastised him, Plagg simply shrugged in response.

"This is so wild," Nino repeated, Adrien smiled at him and put a hand on his shoulder, "I'm married to Chat Noir, this ridiculous, I'm married to Chat Noir."

"Don't go announcing that to anyone now," Adrien chuckled but gave Nino a serious look.

"Oh, yeah, totally, no, no one's going to know. No one will know, my lips are sealed," Nino said, waving his hands as he spoke.

Adrien pulled him into a hug, the smell of shampoo still in his damp hair filling Nino's nose.

"Listen, I'm so sorry for lying to you about this. I never wanted to lie, it's just, you know. It's dangerous for people to know," Adrien sighed.

"I understand Adrien," Nino said, wrapping him arms around him, "I swear, I'll never let anyone else know about this."

Adrien simply hugged him harder.

They pulled away and Nino shook his head again, "I'm sorry, I just, I married Chat Noir."

"You know that Chat Noir, I heard he married that famous DJ Nino Lahiffe-Agreste, he's the real cat's meow," Adrien said, acting like a fan who just read the information off a tabloid.

Nino burst out laughing, he certainly would say "famous" when relating to himself.

"See, I do get you to laugh with my humor!"