She was late.

Well, not that late, but late enough that he was starting to at least kind of sort of worry, not that he wasn't doing that already. He was fairly certain that he didn't get any sleep last night, and despite eating almost nothing he stomach was doing flips and it felt like he was about to pass out.

But there was no way that he was going to run away from this - passing out was another story - he basically had a date with one of his best friends and the first girl to kiss him, all rolled into one incredibly hot package. Also, as Ren put it, she was thirstier than Nora in the middle of summer.

"Maybe I should have set us up on the grass? If we're going to be eating on a balcony we might as well be sitting at a table." He sighed running a hand through his hair and pulled at his hoodie. It was a little cold out, maybe he should have thought of something besides a picnic, like well, a movie night? Home-cooked dinner? Anything. "Why is this whole dating thing so hard? And I'm basically dating two girls at once."

"Seriously, why is my first relationship so problematic?" Both hands were in his hair now, scrambling his brain. He wanted a nice simple romance, the kind where he'd get a cute girl in Beacon, get married, have some kids, and just have a simple life as kickass huntsmen.

And why was there a crow glaring at him?

"What if she grows taller than me?" Not that there was anything wrong with tall women, it was just he always pictured himself as the taller one, would Pyrrha, Ruby, be okay with dating someone shorter than them? Ruby probably not considering how she used to be so short, but Pyrrha might not mind.

The door slid open and his heartbeat began to quicken. Oh no! He was so not ready for this! For any of this!

"You're so going to-" Nora's head popped out of the door the giant grin on her face fell when she looked him up and down. "Seriously, you're dressed like that?"

"What's wrong with how I'm dressed?" It was just a hoodie, shirt, and jeans. "This is what I always wear."

"That's actually the problem." Nora rolled her eyes, then shifted, turning her head back. "Huh? What? Yes he's wearing jeans. What? How am I supposed to know if his butt looks good in them? Hey! Don't hit me because you can't control your own mouth. Oh, screw it!"

"Quit squirming and get out there you giant freak!"

"I'm not that tall!"

Ruby was thrust out into the open. She was in a word breathtaking, her hair was woven up into a knot in the back of her head that looked like a rose with black and red petals held in place by a golden pin. Everything about her looked like she had put in extra effort, from the laces on her white blouse to the red sash that acted as a belt made her waist pop against the black pants she was wearing. A red eyeshadow that faded to black brought out the shine of her silver eyes and the ruby red of her lipstick brought everything together. It all looked so very Ruby, but just extra.

He understood what was wrong with his clothes now.

"I wasn't talking about your butt! Nora was just messing with us and umm" Ruby spluttered out her face growing redder by the second and she fidgeted with a strand of her hair. "And, there's nothing with your clothes I like your hoodie, and it's just a picnic and stuff so I don't know why I'm so nervous. Ahh, I'm sorry!"

That's right, he wasn't the only one nervous about this. His fellow socially awkward nerd was still there and freaking out just as much as he was. Probably more so. And Pyrrha was in there too, who despite all of her social graces was just as awkward. He really shouldn't have worried so much.

Or maybe he wasn't worrying enough.

"You look great Ruby, I like what you did with your hair." He went to grab for her hand but stopped and turned to gesture towards the picnic. Smoothe Jaune smooth. She kissed him last night and this was how he was going to act? But that kiss was part of the reason why he was so nervous!

That and he hadn't seen Qrow all day.

A smile cracked on her face and she fumbled with her bun. "Thanks, Ren did it. Nora did my makeup too. I think they're more excited about this than we are." She extended her hand out to him blinking at him. "Umm, the food looks good!"

"Oh, uhh well it's nothing really, just some of the stuff I used to make back home." Looks like all those domestic skills his sisters had drilled into his head were finally being put to use. He took her hand and guided her down to a seat. Their blanket was a blue patch pattern, and most of the food was finger foods and a few sweets.

Ruby gasped, darting forward to snag one of the cookies he had hidden under a napkin. "Cookies? Did you make these?" she didn't even wait for him to answer him before scarfing down the treat. "Oh my god, they're so good!"

"Uhh, yeah, I baked them in a different kitchen so you wouldn't sniff them out." Ren's idea really. "I kind of wanted to surprise you."

"Oh!" She snapped her mouth shut and concealed the cookies once more pushing the plate away from her. "Sorry, cookie senses and stuff."

"Don't worry about it, they're meant to be eaten, but why don't we dig in and umm, do whatever it is we're supposed to be doing on a date?" He had no idea what that was! They already knew each other, and all three of the minds in Ruby made it really clear that they were crazy about him. Which left him standing on the outside, wondering how genuine his feelings were, or if they were a result of her feelings or her looks.

"Right, date stuff." she folded her hands on her lap and pushed a defiant strand of hair out of her face. "Umm, what exactly do we do on a date, besides eat food and cookies, and stuff."

"I have no idea." He smiled, grabbing one of the red solo cups he had filled with soda minutes ago and handed it to Ruby. "But, uhh to the socially awkward?"

She snorted grabbing the cup and banging it against his. "Dork."

"Yea I know, but you're the one dating a dork so ha-ha."

A black and red sphere appeared in the middle of their food scattering it to the wind and knocking it over.

"My food!"

"The cookies!"

"Why is it always something!" he shouted scrambling up to get his gear. Ruby was already armed with Crescent Rose, barrel aimed at the object that was growling like an engine. "Do you have any idea what that is?"

"Not a clue!" Ruby shouted, all the nervousness was gone from her and she was ready to fight. She cocked her weapon. "But it wrecked my cookies! So it's going to pay!"

"I'll make you some later." Those cookies were a good idea, he'd have to thank Ren later. "Ren, Nora! We could use a- Oh."

A wheel appeared from the portal followed by the rest of Yang's yellow motorcycle. Weiss was riding on the back looking like she'd gone through hell clutching a frustrated looking Yang. Awesome, back up was here, but there went their date and what was left of their food

"Yang?" Ruby muttered, dropping Crescent Rose to the ground, snapping into its compact forum with ease. She was fidgeting now, squirming under a glare no one was giving her. "I'm sorry! I should have stayed, I should have talked to you more I just didn't know if you even wanted me there and I'm sorry I just -"

"Wait, a second," Yang stepped off her bike, heel crunching into something moist. She looked at Ruby like it was her first time seeing her. "Ruby? Is that you?"

"Umm? Yes? Mostly?"

"What the hell!" Yang shouted stomping over to her sister, she looked mad and her head was tilted down almost like she was staring right at Ruby's - "When did you get so big! You're huge now!"

Ruby turned red. "Oh umm, well I might have gotten a little taller I guess."

Yang shot up looking her sister in the eyes. "Holy shit you're taller than me too! How did this happen? How much milk did you drink? Is there more? Wait are these even real?"

"Yang!"

He probably should go try and save her from her sister but it didn't look like Yang was angry. Just surprised that she was now the little sister. And was now currently jostling Ruby's breasts. It was kind of hot.

"Jaune," Weiss nodded as she came to stand beside him, a blush on her face despite and hands folded ever so elegantly. She smelled like a bar. "Umm, did something happen to Ruby, and what were you two doing? It almost looks like you two were on a date."

"Oh, umm well you see we kind of were having a date, which Yang's motorcycle is currently parked on." He gestured towards the mess around him and sighed. "I worked really hard on that."

"Oh, umm, we should have appeared next to Qrow, I think." Weiss kept her eyes away from the two sisters. Something he was struggling to do as well. "And umm, what happened to Ruby, you can't tell me that's all just some growth spurt."

"Umm, would you believe me if I said Pyrrha's ghost is merging with Ruby and that's for some reason making her grow?"

"Not a chance."

"Then you better ask Ruby." He pointed towards them. "As soon as Yang is done comparing sizes."

AN: Brought to you by harassment on tumblr.