Mollie Anderson didn't tell anyone why she had insisted on wearing a blue dress to church that day, nor did she tell anyone why she'd insisted on bringing a single sheet of heart stickers. But no one objected to the outfit or item. They had too much on their minds already.
"Mollie?" Kurt nudged his tiny daughter's shoulder. She looked up at him with wide, uncertain blue eyes that mirrored his. "You want to go play with your cousins?"
Mollie turned around, keeping a firm grip on her Daddy's hand, and saw Rachel depositing her five-year-old twin sons at the church's nursery. As Rachel rattled off her extensive list of childcare instructions, Sam was waiting near the doorway with his daughter, as was Francey Anderson with her son.
Mollie turned back to Kurt and shook her head.
"No, Daddy. I'm staying with you today."
Kurt forced a smile and scooped up the little girl, setting her on his hip. He sucked in a breath when he saw his father approaching from the entrance. His stomach began to fill with butterflies.
"Where…Blaine?" Kurt choked out.
Burt squeezed his son's shoulder. "He'll be here in a few minutes." Kurt nodded and swallowed a dry breath. "You're gonna get through this day son. I promise. I know."
"So many choices, so much paperwork, so little time," Blaine declared as he starred at the overwhelming heap of brochures and advertisements on the couple's coffee table. "Are you ready to help me, Kurt?"
"Just a minute," said Kurt in his sweet sing-songy voice from his position on the floor nearby.
"Why did you have to volunteer to sort Finn and Rachel's baby clothes over the one weekend that we have to go apartment hunting?"
"Because Rachel is busy with performances, and if I don't pack these away, Finn will. I love my brother but there is no way I'm ever letting him get his hands on outfits I designed. Besides, we didn't know the building was closing down until yesterday, remember?"
"I know, I know," said Blaine. He picked up one brochure for an apartment that was in a bad area but in a nice building, and the he picked up another brochure for an apartment that was in a good area but in a crummy building.
"Ugh!" Blaine tossed both of the brochures aside and sighed. "This is so hard!"
"We could just go with the one I wanted," Kurt suggested.
"Seaspray Towers?"
"It's perfect," Kurt declared as he folded up a navy onesie with red trimming (part of what his friends referred to as his exclusive Baby Warbler line). "It's right between Vogue and NYADA, so neither of us would have a long drive to work, the architecture is pretty, the area is nice…"
"But Seaspray Towers only has two-bedroom apartments," said Blaine.
"So?" Kurt looked away as he grabbed a tiny pair of black corduroy overalls with gold stars on all the pockets (part of what his friends referred to as his You Know Rachel Berry Too Well For Your Own Good line). "You have a good job. I have a good job. We can afford it."
Blaine sighed and smiled affectionately. "I know you're in love with it, babe, but I just don't see the sense in us spending money on a two bedroom apartment when we only need…" Blaine paused and looked up at his husbands face, and realization suddenly hit him.
"You want to have a baby?"
Kurt looked up slowly and raised a mischievous eyebrow.
"Kiiiind of?"
Blaine's jaw dropped open. Kurt looked away.
"You think it's a terrible idea?"
"No! No, I don't. But are you sure that we're ready for this now? We haven't even been living together for two years yet. We haven't saved enough for the wedding. I just started teaching at NYADA."
Kurt shrugged. "My parents were fresh out of high school when I was born. We all turned out fine."
"But how are you even planning on doing this? Do you know how hard it is for two men-who aren't even legally married yet-to become parents in this day in age? There's a reason Rachel's dads ended up paying Shelby over a hundred grand."
"We won't have to pay our surrogate that much," said Kurt.
"How do you know that?"
"Because a certain someone already agreed to do it for free."
"Really? Who?" Blaine guessed before Kurt could say anything. "Rachel?"
"Yep. She's already talked it over with Finn. We'd just have to wait a few months until her contract is up with Oklahoma to start trying."
"She's willing to give up her Broadway body again after she worked so hard to gain it back after having the twins?"
"Only if we do it soon," said Kurt, delicately sitting down on the couch and taking both of Blaine's hands in his. "Come on, Blaine. If we say no to Rachel now and she starts doing another play after Oklahoma, she may never agree to take a break again. This may be our best chance. We can't let it slip away."
Blaine couldn't help but return Kurt's adorable smile. "Okay," he finally said. "Let's do it."
Kurt threw his arms around Blaine and kissed him full on the lips, when he pulled away, the two men were so close Kurt was practically in Blaine's lap.
"We're definitely getting an egg donor, though," said Blaine. "Because I don't know if I could handle living with the biological child of you and Rachel. It would be the diva to end all divas."
"That's okay, Rachel already said she doesn't want it to be hers. She admitted she'd probably be too controlling if it was. Although your point would be moot if we decided to make YOU the biological father."
"No," said Blaine. "I want my baby to have pretty blue eyes like you."
Kurt pretended to pout. "But I want my baby to have beautiful dark curls like you."
Mollie rested her head on Kurt's shoulder as he walked down the aisle of the church, her dark curls blending in with his pitch-black tux. She clutched her teddy in one hand and her sticker sheet in the other, protecting both from the sea of strange bodies surrounding herself and her Daddy. She noticed that Daddy was looking down and avoiding eye contact with absolutely everyone, so she did the same.
"Never thought I'd see you inside a church, Kurt," a man with sad eyes remarked.
"Mrs. Anderson insisted," Kurt replied stiffly, not lifting his eyes from the floor and marching forward, keeping his little girl close.
When Kurt sat down in the front pew of the church, he adjusted Mollie's position so she was sitting sideways on his lap with her legs swung over his right leg and her head was rested against his chest. Keeping her stickers clenched in her left hand, Mollie hooked her arms around her Daddy's left arm and looked around the room. She saw Aunt Francey coming in from the right and making their way towards the front. Grandma Hannah was talking to a man in what looked to Mollie like a big black coat. Mollie watched the unfamiliar man wrap his arms around Grandma Hannah and speak to her softly, as if they were telling each other secrets. When he released her, she came over and sat down next to Mollie and Kurt. When Mollie waved to her, Hannah Anderson forced a tiny smile for her granddaughter and then turned away and faced straightforward.
"Where's Blaine?" asked Kurt.
"He's…" Hannah paused to let out a shaky breath. "He'll be here soon."
"I can't believe this is finally happening, Blaine," said Kurt. "We're gonna be daddies." He hesitantly touched and rubbed Rachel's swollen stomach. The baby was actively wiggling between contractions.
"We're already daddies." Blaine covered Kurt's hand with his, and the two of them felt their unborn daughter kick. They'd finished setting up the ladybug themed nursery several months ago. They had a bureau filled with dozens of newborn outfits, mostly designed or purchased and later altered by Kurt, a few hand-me-downs from Rachel's babies that Kurt had deemed gender neutral, and some gifts from friends and family. They had a changing table stocked with enough supplies to last them over a month and an extra case of diapers in the closet that Carole had given them at their baby shower. The world was more than ready for a baby Anderson girl.
"Don't you two dare go getting sappy on me now," said Blaine's sister Francey in a tone that was both sharp and comforting, per the norm. "At least wait for the kid to be here first."
"Speaking of which, are Brantley and Zachary coming?" asked Kurt.
"They're taking the train tomorrow," said Francey. "Zach doesn't do very well on airplanes. His ears always hurt and he ends up screaming and cussing at the other passengers."
Blaine smiled. "Oh, I can't imagine why a child of yours would do something like that."
"Ahem, friendly reminder that your precious bundle of joy is in technicality my direct descendant, which means that she could totally end up with all of my annoying-as-fuck habits that you like to make fun of so much." Francey winked before she turned around, leaving the fathers-to-be to gawk at each other in horror. "How are you feeling, Rachel?"
"How do you think I'm feeling?" Rachel let out an agonizing groan as her body put her through another contraction, causing her to squeeze Finn's hand so hard he gritted his teeth.
"How far apart was that?" asked Blaine.
Finn glanced at his stopwatch. "Less than one minute."
Rachel looked down at her bulging stomach and grinned weakly before turning to the nurse who was examining her.
"How much longer?"
"Less time than we expected." The nurse turned to Kurt and Blaine. "Gentlemen-it's almost time to meet your daughter."
As soon as she said that, Kurt frantically grabbed a comb out of Rachel's purse.
"Babe, this really isn't the time to be fixing your hair," said Blaine.
"But I have to look good when I meet my baby for the first time."
"You look…" Blaine cupped Kurt's chin in his hands "…amazing. And this baby is never going to care what you look like. All she cares about is that you're going to be the best daddy in the world." Kurt relaxed a tiny bit as Blaine gave him a quick, affectionate peck.
"How are you feeling, Kurt?" asked a tall lady who was attempting to brush Kurt's shoulder in a way that made him pull away, jostling himself and Mollie a bit.
"How do you think I'm feeling?" asked Kurt in a voice so soft it was barely audible.
"Huh?" The woman leaned in closer.
When Aunt Rachel, who had been sitting in the second row from the front, stood up and told the woman that she and everyone else would have the opportunity to speak to Kurt after the service was over, Mollie glanced over at Francey, hunched at the very end of the pew, over Grandma Hannah's shoulder. Mollie saw that Francey was holding a handkerchief to her face and had tears running down her cheeks. Mollie looked away, shaken by the sight. Aunt Francey wasn't a person who cried. Not ever.
Mollie looked up again when a tall man she didn't recognize came running up the right aisle of the church, bent down, and hugged Francey tightly while she cried harder and yelled at him for being late. When the strange man was done hugging Francey, he tried to say something to Kurt, but Kurt just ignored everyone and wrapped his arms more tightly around Mollie. She closed her eyes and pressed her forehead to the fabric of his shirt.
Kurt and Blaine stood next to each other, both doing their best to caress the tiny pink bundle nestled in Kurt's arms. Kurt and Blaine looked at each other, and looked down at their daughter. The whole world was the three of them. Nothing else mattered.
"Come stop your crying, it'll be alright," sang Kurt softly. "Just take my hand, hold it tight. I will protect you from all around you. I will be here, don't you cry."
Kurt shifted his gaze to meet Blaine's eyes for a moment, half-expecting that his husband would playfully laugh at him. Instead, Blaine looked down at the baby and began singing.
"For one so small, you seem so strong. My arms will hold you, keep you safe and warm."
The baby girl looked up at Blaine with wide blue-green eyes-Kurt's eyes-and let out something between a gurgle and a yelp. Then she fell silent and contentedly began taking in the world around her.
"This bond between us can't be broken," Kurt continued. "I will be here, don't you cry. Cause you'll be in my heart. Yes you'll be in my heart. For this day on, now and forever more."
Blaine smiled at him knowingly and finished the song. "You'll be here in my heart. No matter what they say. You'll be here in my heart, always."
Kurt himself sniffled when he realized a tear was rolling down his cheek.
"We did it, Blaine," he whispered, stroking his daughter's satin-soft cheek with the fingers of his left hand. "We're here."
"Blaine's here."
Kurt shuddered and tried to pull Mollie closer into him, but she sat up straight and sat facing the front of the church on her Daddy's lap.
"Daddy, where's Papa?" asked Mollie.
Kurt wordlessly kissed the top of his daughter's head and reached behind him for Rachel's hand, which she squeezed in both of hers. Mollie looked back and saw Aunt Rachel bow her head in an attempt to hide her own shameless tears.
The doors near the back of the church swung open, and Mollie leaned forward to see who was coming in while at the same time holding onto Kurt with her left hand. She watched as Uncle Finn, Uncle Brantley, the strange man who'd just been hugging Aunt Francey, and Sam all walked in carrying what looked like a massive wooden box. They carefully sat the box down on an elegant metal rack. Then Uncle Finn and Uncle Brantley unlatched the lid of the box and opened it. Mollie wriggled in her daddy's grasp because she couldn't see the inside of the box from where she was sitting, but he held her back and let his tears fall on her forehead.
Finn joined Rachel in the seat behind them, Brantley and Cooper both joined Francey in the front row, and Sam joined his wife in one of the middle rows.
The Anderson family's bubble of love was interrupted when Burt sighed and muttered, "Suddenly I feel very old."
"You're not that old," Carole said with a gentle pat of her husband's shoulder. "You and Mollie were young. Kurt and Blaine are young."
Blaine looked up and met Kurt's eyes. "Should we tell them now?"
"Tell us what?" asked Burt.
Kurt looked around to make sure everyone was listening. Burt, Carole, and Francey were watching them intently. Finn was sitting at the edge of the hospital bed giving Rachel a foot rub, but both of them looked up when they saw Kurt waiting for them.
"We've chosen a name for the baby," said Kurt. He glanced at Blaine with a meaningful glint in his eye. "Tell them, Blaine.
Blaine beamed. "We're naming her after the three most amazing women in our lives."
"And we're going to call her Mollie, after Mom," Kurt finished, pointedly looking at his father, who's eyes had already began to water up. When Kurt handed the newborn baby off to her Papa, his father stepped forward and embraced him.
"She would be so proud of you, Kurt," Burt whispered in his son's ear.
"As you all know, we are gathered here today to honor Blaine Anderson, loving husband of Kurt Hummel-Anderson, and loving father of Margaret Frances Rachel Anderson."
Kurt looked back at the people sitting in the row behind him; Finn, Rachel, Burt, and Carole. He wished that he and Mollie could sit with them today instead of the Andersons, but today was about honoring Blaine, and thus, the people closest to him needed to be in the very front. Kurt continued to face his family for a few more seconds and received four sympathetic looks. He tore his gaze away after meeting Burt's eyes for one microsecond too long. He didn't need to ask to know what was on his father's mind. He didn't need to say anything for it to occur to anyone on that bench that he and his father now had something incomprehensibly horrible in common. They had both met and found the person they could have spent the rest of their lives with at a young age only to have the loves of their lives ripped away by the cruel hands of fate.
"Why can't they understand the way we feel? They just don't trust what they can't explain. I know we're different but, deep inside is, we're not that different at all."
Kurt softly knocked on the door frame to the baby's nursery. Blaine looked up from the tired one-year-old infant and smiled at Kurt. Then he looked down and continued singing to the baby.
"And you'll be in my heart. Yes, you'll be in my heart. From this day on, now and forever more."
Kurt watched his husband lower their baby into her crib and carefully cover her with a pink blanket. The sleeping child let out a contented sigh. Kurt smiled when he noticed that Blaine had put her in one of his favorite outfits, a red nightgown with a black velvet bow across the middle (part of his exclusive Baby New Directions line). When Blaine saw Kurt, he tiptoed out into the hallway, gently closed the nursery door behind him, and greeted his husband with a quick peck.
"I see you added a verse to that song," Kurt remarked.
"Huh?" said Blaine. "What are you talking about?"
"What you just sang," said Kurt.
"I just sang the second verse of the song." Kurt's brow wrinkled with confusion. Blaine's mouth dropped open in horror. "You've seriously never heard the whole song?"
"You know I never listen to random covers of Disney songs," Kurt retorted. "I love the originals too much."
"That was the original song! It plays during the credits of the movie!"
"You know I never watch the credits!"
Blaine sighed and shook his head. "Oh, Kurt. Apparently we're going to have to rewatch Tarzan. And possibly every Disney movie ever."
"Sounds great," said Kurt. "But we might as well wait until Mollie is old enough to watch it with us, don't you think?"
"You don't think Mollie is old enough to watch Tarzan? The fight scenes aren't as scary as the climax of The Little Mermaid, and you've let her watch that."
"This is different," Kurt insisted.
"Why?"
"Because Tarzan's human parents die at the beginning and his gorilla father dies at the end. The whole movie is basically about parents dropping like flies. I don't want to scare her."
Blaine giggled. "She's one year old. She's not going to understand what's happening. Besides, our daughter has two very wonderful parents who will never leave her, so there's nothing for her to be scared of."
As the priest went on about Blaine's various connections to others-his parents, his siblings, his nephews, his friends, his colleagues-Kurt watched Mollie blankly look around the room at everyone she loved, all wearing black and crying. It suddenly hit him that in addition to having the loss of a spouse in common with his father, he now had the loss of a parent in common with his daughter. There had been so many times when he was growing up that he'd been sad and outright angry that his mother couldn't be there for him. The day he realized he was gay. The day he came out to his father. The day Finn rejected him. The day Karofsky hate-kissed him. As amazing as Burt had been at all of those times, he hadn't been able to fill the hole that was left when Kurt's mother died. Not then, not ever.
Tears filled Kurt's eyes as Mollie snuggled in closer to him and slid her right thumb into her mouth. Was it going to be the same for her? Were they going to have moments where she looked around at her world and thought 'I need Papa, I wish he was here,' and there would be nothing Kurt would be able to do about it? Worse yet, was she going to forget about Blaine altogether?
Kurt had been young when his mother had died. But at least he'd been old enough to grasp the concept of death, of someone being gone forever. Mollie wasn't even three years old yet. She was hardly more than a baby.
"By the power vested in me by the state of New York, I now pronounce you husband and husband. You may kiss the groom."
The room exploded with applause as Blaine pulled Kurt into their first kiss as married men. Camera lights flashed brightly. Rachel and Tina's sobbing could be heard over the whistling and clapping. Kurt and Blaine both kept their eyes closed as long as they could get away with it. Then Kurt opened his eyes and took in his handsome, beaming new husband.
"I now present to you for the first time, Mr. and Mr. Anderson!"
"I feel like the luckiest guy in the world," Kurt said so softly it was almost a whisper.
Blaine's smile broadened as he gently stroked Kurt's cheek with his left hand.
"No, no. That would be me."
Blaine turned around to face the group of his former high school classmates who he'd strategically seated in one of the back rows of the church, and he gave them a signal. All of the former Dalton Academy Warblers stood up and began singing.
"Don't listen to them, cause what do they know
You need each other, to have, to hold
They'll see in time, I know
When destiny calls you, you must be strong
I may not be with you, but you've got to hold on
They'll see in time, I know
You'll show them together"
Unable to hold back the tears any longer, Kurt buried his face in his new husband's shoulder. Blaine just held him and sang along with the choir.
In Carole's arms, Mollie pressed her right hand to her lips and blew her fathers a kiss.
"We will begin with a few words from Mr. Hummel-Anderson," said the priest.
Kurt stood up, still holding Mollie, and began making his way to the front of the church. He felt his little girl wriggle in his arms.
"Down!"
Kurt sighed. "Go sit with Grandpa Burt," he instructed as he set her down on the floor. Burt sat up straight and motioned for the little girl to run over to him, but instead, she ran over to the wooden box that her uncles had carried in, stood up on her tiptoes, and grabbed the edge in her chunky fingers.
"Mollie, no!" said Kurt. He, his dad, and Rachel were all already scrambling for the toddler, but when Burt tried to pick her up, she screamed.
"Grandpa, no! I want to see Papa!"
Kurt's face turned paler than it had already been. "Mollie, sit down right now!"
"I want to see Papa!"
Rachel, upon looking around and realizing that she was the only person standing up who was even remotely close to keeping it together, knelt down in front of her little niece.
"Papa's not really here, Mollie," said Rachel carefully. "There's only a part of him that makes it look like he's here."
"But I need to see him! I have something for him!"
Mollie felt the hairbrush tug on her hair as she stood on the stepstool and looked at herself in the bathroom mirror. Her papa's sweet voice was echoing through the small bathroom as he brushed her curls.
"Saw you from my window, my heart skipped a beat. Going to sit by your doorstep, so that I can meet pretty blue eyes."
Blaine set the hairbrush aside and grabbed a big red bow to match Mollie's dress.
"Please come out today, so I can tell you what I have to say, that I love you, love you pretty blue eyes."
Mollie giggled as Blaine scooped her up and set her back down on the floor, and turned her around so that he could take her in.
"Sing my heart song next, Papa!"
"Sorry, baby girl," said Blaine with a kiss on his baby's forehead. "I have to get to work."
Mollie frowned. "But then I'll have nobody to sing to me while Daddy is getting dressed!"
"Tell you what, I'll sing you the heart song when I get home tonight, okay?"
"Okay. Love you, Papa."
Mollie planted a kiss on Blaine's cheek. He stood up.
"Kurt, I'm leaving for work now! See you tonight!"
"Kay, love you babe!"
"Love you too!"
No explanation had been given as to why Mollie's Papa had never come home from work that night, or for her daddy's breakdown after receiving a mysterious phone call, or for the amount of time that Mollie had been spending at Finn and Rachel's house over the past four days. No one had told her why Uncle Finn was so unusually quiet or why everything was making Aunt Rachel cry or why suddenly every family friend or relative Mollie had ever heard of and then some was arriving in New York one by one.
But she didn't need to be told to know something was wrong.
"I want to see in the box," Mollie begged. "Please."
Burt and Rachel both looked at the little girl, and then back at Kurt. Kurt wordlessly scooped up Mollie so that she was able to see into the coffin.
The man inside the coffin was dressed in a suit with a navy and red striped tie. He had dark black curls like Papa. He had a face that looked just like Papa's. But Aunt Rachel was right. Papa wasn't really here.
"Mollie, what are you doing?" asked Kurt when his daughter began delicately pulling heart stickers off of her sticker sheet and putting them on her fingertips. Mollie didn't answer but instead began putting the stickers on Blaine's tie. There was a slight stir in the pews as the guests wondered what was happening. A few people started crying.
"There," said Mollie after she placed one heart sticker on each of the cold hands that once belonged to her Papa. "Now Papa will know we love him when he comes back."