[Warning: This is either going to be the most awesome AN you've ever read or an utterly miserable experience. You are either going to come away from it really excited about what I'm going to do... Or you're never going to want to think about me or this story again. (not that I expect you've had much cause to do so lately) Just try to prepare yourself for either outcome.]

Hi everyone. I know it's been a long time. Hope the holidays treated you well. Happy 2020!

Can't wait to read all the NaruSaku stories this year. Since I'm writing one, I love everything about those two and so I am reading all I can in hopes of creating the perfect NaruSaku work! Wait, no. None of that sounds like something I would say.

There's two things that I feel like I need to communicate. The first is (much much) shorter and probably of more interest, but I'd appreciate it if people took the time to read both. After this I can't imagine having much to say beyond things like "Might post another chapter in a little while!" or "Hope you ended up liking the story!" so yeah.

1) I have most of two chapters already written. They happen to include a few ideas that people were interested in, so there's something for everyone (and probably also something for everyone to prefer I didn't include.) I'll post them very soon. But the more amazing thing is, someone advised me that the best way to continue this story would be to figure out how I was going to end it. Well, I did that! In fact, I already wrote most of it as well. And I'm still not really sure how to get there from here, or how much I want to/there should be between there and here. But it's a segment that I find so satisfying that it actually melts my brain a little. It takes the themes of the story full circle with lots of the wholehearted emotionalism/sentimentality that made everyone like Naruto. Or at least that made me like Naruto (although I really DON'T like it very much anymore).

The last thing I'd want to do is cheapen the impact of it by not getting there properly or by rushing it, but I feel that I absolutely have to publish it at some point. I'd rather cheapen it than never post it. Right now it's my favorite thing that I've written for this, although in six months or so I probably won't think so (more on this in 2... Fair warning, I don't expect anyone to like all or even most of what I'm saying. But when I write/post more of this tale, I want to have a really good feeling about it, like I'm sharing it with people who like some of the things that I like about it too. So I am going to at LENGTH explain what I regret about the story, the pairing, and how people see both. It's LONG but it's IMPORTANT so please try to read it. Take two sittings to read it if you have to. I'm not going to show ANY RESTRAINT (CAPS!) but if you've read the stuff I've written, then you've come to expect that from me. And if you enjoy something like this story then you'll definitely enjoy reading this... I think.)

If you take only one thing away from all this, have it be the knowledge that I fully intend to finish this story in SOME way.

2) With the time I spent not thinking about this at all, I've been able to read it again with less of the distorting bias of being its author. And I realize now that I'm probably the most inconsistent author ever. Maybe even more inconsistent than Kishimoto. At times I come up with something and execute it in a way that's absolutely brilliant (and I'm sure someone's going to say, or at least think "Everything you did was fucking awful." Well, I like that about it too, thanks for saying so), and at other times I just try WAY too hard and actually ruin or miss what I was going for by trying to make it really cool all the time.

A story needs to have hills and valleys. It can't just be like "Wow, that was cool! Wow, that was cool too! Wow, that was cool 3! 4! 5! 6!" Etc... There has to be lower-impact parts. I understand that and always have. But when I write, I have the MOST trouble with the quiet parts and the EASIEST time with the crazy parts. So I end up including a lot of craziness as a result. It's just how I am for whatever reason. Looking at how certain parts of Naruto played out, Kishi might have some of the same issues. But he's probably not as terrible about this as I am. With that in mind, I have to explain/admit something.

I didn't portray Sakura the way I wanted to at a couple points. It was not my intention that she be seen as spending every waking hour on Naruto-related things (though due to the framework of this/most purely romantic stories, it is GOING to seem like that sometimes). Goofing around with him is something she has a lot of fun with, but a (mostly) normal relationship is what she has in mind and would make her happy.

But I can't and won't deny that I had her say and do too many crazy things. I both understand and respect the fact that some people found her to be creepy/obsessed/codependent/a Yandere/what have you. Part of me wants to explain even more than this but I don't want to ruin something. What I will say is that for anyone who thinks that between Sakura and Naruto, Sakura is the more pathetic/clingy/needy one, you are incorrect that Naruto being the strong one is what I am ultimately going for. I realize that this might sound like a joke. But I swear that it's not. There is a time or two where I meant for her to legitimately be cracking (like the bit about her first moving in - I can't stand how I did that part when I read it again. I think it sucks, but not because of how Sakura acts, because a lot about it comes off as forced), but if you recall, I made Naruto do this too.

I will say that most of the time, Sakura is acting shameless/pitiful/weak essentially ON PURPOSE because she just LIKES HOW IT FEELS to be open with Naruto about her fears/wants, seeing that he will not respond by hurting or rejecting her in any way. She's typically stressed, but she's very used to that because she's a neurotic person. She's still in full control of both herself and the situation and just lets herself go in this almost disgusting torrent of emotion because she likes how it feels to abandon her pride/self-consciousness and see that she's still safe and loved despite how negatively she sees herself (deep down, on the surface, or both.)

His unshakable romantic love for her is her kryptonite. It absolutely baffles her and knocks her on her ass and it always will because this is probably the aspect that I like the most. The following is probably obvious, but if Naruto did choose to respond by hating/rejecting/verbally abusing her, she'd understand that and feel like she deserved it for the (real or otherwise) wrongs she believes she has done to him.

Naruto does NOT display the same behavior to ANY degree and that may lead some to view him as the (possibly by far) more stable member of the duo, which he is not meant to be. Trust me that this isn't a spoiler, I just didn't do as well as I could have with it.

When Sakura DOES fixate on him, it is generally or ULTIMATELY coming from an entirely SELFLESS place based on fear for his welfare, happiness, or some such thing.

As I was writing this, I was not very concerned with the possibility that I might be portraying Sakura in a way that some would find unhealthy or even self-destructive... I understand that someone might really like those kinds of ideas, and actually I might too if they were done well, but speaking about JUST this story, it's not something I find desirable. Though I have never understood why this would be seen as something that would not naturally resolve itself and I understand even less why it would be viewed as intolerable. It might not be what I (or someone else) would prefer but it might make something else happen that I would really enjoy!

I would absolutely prefer my (or someone else's...) Sakura to come off in any number of unhealthy ways rather than seeming entitled/superior, or worse, like she doesn't CARE about what's going on. I dislike many aspects of the canonical portrayal of Sakura but I GUARANTEE that they are not the exact same ones you dislike. Some of mine even have nothing to do with a certain duckass-haired individual that you all know and love!

I also cannot stand a lot of fan interpretations of Sakura/NaruSaku. Sorry, but I am just not that kind of a fan or really much of a "fan" at all. I do not hate everything about Sakura liking DuckAssHead, in fact I REALLY LIKE it. I don't think I would really care for Naruto and Sakura together if Sakura had never done so or done so on such a superficial level that it didn't affect anything.

So I am the furthest thing from anyone's ideal for this. I respect and like the pairing but there are things I hate about them as well. I am going to tell you what they are because I think that after I do, you are going to understand or at least have an IDEA about why this story is the way it is.

To start with: Stagnant, one-sided NS is usually quite awful because Sakura almost NEVER seems to grow, mature, or act like herself, or even act like an actual girl/person (this is to the extent that she is portrayed meaningfully at ALL). So it is not BELIEVABLE or at least not RELATABLE that she manages to inspire such FANATICAL DEVOTION. I know (or rather it's my opinion) that Naruto loved Sakura but unconditional love (by its miserable lonesome) is not something that interests me in a STORY. I do like what might COME FROM IT... For example justifying it, rewarding it, or even ironically PUNISHING IT/showing that it was false or wrong or even FOOLISH, etcetera. I am weird in that I like HAVING THINGS HAPPEN. SHOW me how, why and what he loves about Sakura, take the time to make it POIGNANT. It's as if there's this unspoken assumption by the author that I just know all this stuff already so they're not going to waste my time with it! It's so lazy to take this shortcut because you think someone reading is going to feel the same way about a pairing as you do. Maybe they do, but even if that's the case they'd enjoy it more if you actually showed what both of you apparently like so much.

"Oh no, they were nice together in the manga! But now this hurts and is so unfortunate!" I don't care about that at all. Make me BELIEVE IT.

I once wrote a fucking awful, long since deleted story where Naruto grew to HATE and ended up KILLING Sakura and even with how HORRIBLE that was (how horribly it was written by me - sorry if this makes you want to read it, but it's really gone. If you're interested in really horrible stories though, just read any of the ones on my profile that aren't "Special" or this one. Maybe even including this one.) ... I thought it was more palatable than that.

I have also found myself absolutely revolted by a number of other scenarios I've seen for the pairing, such as the two of them carrying on this torrid emotional affair that both have too much respect for their absolutely PATHETIC families to act on, either that or their balls/spines have not only been surgically removed, but also tossed into an INCINERATOR. Or the bench scene is used as an long-term excuse for Sakura like she's a robot who's programmed to love someone based on that alone, rather than, oh I dunno, maybe her life in totality? Or literally nothing happens and one or both of them have these oh so bittersweet and sad feelings that they are never courageous enough to voice and then one or both of them die. Or any other misguided attempt to twist and distort some shitty part of the canon (usually the ending) to serve some WHOLLY ARTIFICIAL tragedy.

It's like... Who gives a shit? Both of you are pitifully spineless, gutless (and possibly brainless) doormats with no attractive qualities whatsoever. You're both awful. I don't see why either of you want the other, but you sure were meant for each other!

Cut away the nonsense and you're left with a portrayal of a pair of COWARDS who are not only unwilling to live for themselves, they're ALSO unwilling to live for each other and this is the least romantic atmosphere there is. It craps all over the idea that these characters are PEOPLE who would like to be HAPPY and I absolutely HATE misanthropic garbage like this. I find it INCREDIBLY tiresome and irritating but mostly just SILLY (If the AUTHOR OF SAKURA RESSENTIMENT finds something silly, then for CRYING OUT LOUD, you know it has to be ABSOLUTELY LUDICROUS.)

Understand: Pathos that requires an IDIOT PLOT or the characters being driven by some aspect that remains entirely unexplored, or motivations that amount to some UNRELATABLE CYBERNETIC BULLSHIT, can evoke NOTHING from me other than ANNOYANCE and REVULSION.

Pathos that comes from characters acting like FLAWED people, but PEOPLE, people with WANTS and DREAMS and AMBITIONS beyond the continued THEFT OF OXYGEN from those who were actually DOING SOMETHING WITH IT... is so, SO awesome to me.

I get it that people like what they like. But I'm coming from a place that is so far away from those ideas that I not only don't like them, I can't even COMPREHEND why people like them. It literally doesn't make any sense to me at all.

To me, Naruto loves Sakura (or fill in anyone loves anyone, and with the reasons that YOU think they do/would. This is how you can get started writing your OWN cringeworthy romantic piece! You're welcome.) because at her best, Sakura doesn't DENY who she IS no matter how AWFUL and SELFISH she thinks that person is. Sakura can be really VIBRANT and COLORFUL. She's VITAL, ALIVE. She OWNS HERSELF. Even if she feels utterly ASHAMED to do so. She's really PASSIONATE and CARING and CUTE and FUN and SMART and all these OTHER THINGS that Naruto likes and she also DOES all these DIFFERENT THINGS THAT HE LIKES. If she has lost ALL or even a MAJORITY of these qualities then I can't say whether or not he'd continue to love her but I know I don't want to read about him doing so... BECAUSE I DO NOT LIKE, RELATE TO, OR UNDERSTAND THAT.

(If there's someone wondering whether or not I stole a small part of the above from somewhere... I just wanna say that I like you a lot. I'm happy that someone as cool as you has read and maybe even liked something I wrote. Feel free to read the rest of this diatribe in the same fashion because that strikes me as strangely appropriate. Haha, yup, the whole thing! If you're really out there, that is. If not, don't worry about this at all.)

I do not understand the appeal of a story about two broken people named Naruto and Sakura who are not even Naruto and Sakura anymore and on top of that they don't even really do anything. Just END the story before it even begins. "Naruto was never able to get Sakura to love him for real or at least he didn't think so and so he became fucking miserable and by the way, Sakura was also miserable because she really did love him but never said anything for some reason. The end."

I mean, that's awesome. Tragic. I got it. I'm not even joking - I just pictured that scenario in my head and it was a thousand times more impactful than any of these soporific narratives because it didn't WASTE MY TIME.

Please, if you're reading this and you're a fictional character: Try to KISS or FUCK or HURT or HELP or just do SOMETHING with the person you love... Or HUMILIATE, DISGRACE or DESTROY yourself in the attempt. Just DO SOMETHING. Don't tell me "There's something I want, but I sit around and wait for the sweet embrace of death to take me because of X thing you don't care about, and Y that is supposed to be important to me even though I don't act like it is... plus I'm way too Z, which is tragic but in character for me according to manga chapter 997, page 10"

You clearly DON'T want that thing very much. If you did, you would not allow these inane ABSTRACTIONS to CRIPPLE you. You definitely like the IDEA of having it, but you do not WANT it nor would you even appreciate it if you had it. There is nothing romantic or admirable about taking this self-absorbed approach to everything except when it might make you happy or produce some kind of interesting result. Ultimately, a character in a story will be evaluated based on their ACTIONS, and it's time you did the math.

Yup! You're worthless. So if DOING NOTHING is your MO... Then let someone else be the main character, because I don't know you.

And I don't WANT to know you.

Is the message with this simply "Look, look, Kishimoto did the wrong thing!"? If so, that's fucking asinine. What an absolute waste of time. To read but ESPECIALLY to write because that takes SO MUCH LONGER. But it must be, because no other fandom does this that I've seen. If you read similar-themed fanfiction about Goku and Bulma for instance, then Goku either kisses Bulma or sleeps with Bulma or marries Bulma or the absolute worst case scenario: Bulma is LITERALLY on her fucking deathbed and both Goku and Bulma start crying because they know it's too late to do any of the aforementioned.

The last one definitely exists and I would NEVER mock it or anything like it, in fact I respect it. I'm that kind of writer too. If you have a specific idea that you REALLY like, then do EXACTLY THAT. Don't just do something REMINISCENT OF IT because you're afraid to come off as cheesy/melodramatic/silly/whatever. Don't compromise in the slightest! Why would you? Because you think people might make fun of it? To HELL with them if they do. Have FUN! But I digress... The point is, these situations are interesting! Really significant things are happening! It's impossible (at least for me) to hate something like that.

Many people hate Duck-Ass-Guy because he's this big depressive emo piece of crap. You want to know why I don't and could never hate him? You want to know why I (in moderation) actually LIKE him? I shouldn't even have to say it at this point, but he is not BORING. He's a man (or duck) of action. He goes out and DOES things that HE thinks are RIGHTEOUS, or JUSTIFIED, or he simply WANTS TO DO THEM. Yes, they're often TERRIBLE and CRUEL and above all STUPID things that make everything SO MUCH WORSE. But guess what? That's good! (for a story!) The most human thing about him is how he makes horrible decisions that hurt everyone including himself. That's a part of life and lots of great emotion will come from that. He's a PERSON in that way and YES, he is even relatable.

Before you ask, no, I don't know how Sakura in particular might end up loving him. But if one of the above scenarios or something similar is truly of interest to you... then maybe, and I know it's going to hurt, but SERIOUSLY CONSIDER IT YOURSELF? Because it's IMPORTANT that when you write a character, you make them ACT LIKE A PERSON.

If YOU do not understand why something happened, if you as the author cannot EXPLAIN why something happened (in a SATISFYING way), then it should NOT be a SIGNIFICANT motivation for your characters. Because you cheapen the pairing if your characters come off as LIFELESS and INHUMAN. You greatly WEAKEN the impact of it by presenting the alternative as so DISMAL that being with NO ONE or even being DEAD would be preferable. If NaruSaku is so wonderful, then they should want to be together even if they could instead be with any NUMBER of AMAZING and ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE... or even ALL OF THEM AT ONCE.

Right? Does anyone disagree with the above paragraph? Or even find something in it to be anything other than insultingly obvious? Regardless, if this sort of thing is something you have done, do, or even WANT to do... Then please just try this once.

Come up with a lively, fun, cute Sakura of your own (or just take the aspects from Kishimoto's that you like), someone who you think Naruto (YOUR idea of Naruto or again some segment of Kishi's) would love more than anything, and put her with Duckface but have her be DOING WELL with that rather than being a BRAINDEAD, PARALYZED DOLL. I know it sounds painful, but understand that you have ENDLESS possibilities. You don't HAVE to let canon or ESPECIALLY headcanon dictate anything, it's actually up to you! Maybe you could have Duckboy grow into a warm, interesting and/or rewarding person to be with as opposed to what you and Kishi think he should be like. Try writing at least one short and nice scene in which young Ducky-kun (or old, Madara-lookalike Ducky-kun - I don't GIVE A SHIT. If you're fixated on details like this, there may be no hope for you. But NOT Naruto wearing his face, no matter how much you would prefer this option) does something kind, sweet, or funny (hell, why not even goofy or silly? There's no limit) ... And it makes Sakura laugh or smile.

I'm not kidding when I say that you NEVER see this handled in that way and that it would be fucking COOL...

But you could also do something ELSE. And you don't have to open your mind all the way, just a LITTLE BIT. And if you can't stand any aspect because of something from the manga then simply IGNORE it or STATE THAT IT PLAYED OUT DIFFERENTLY, but do NOT make the characters ignore it FOR YOU because that's DUMB and it will RUIN your story. Let GO of any considerations other than the story because it's ALL THAT MATTERS HERE. If you feel it necessary, then explore this VERY slowly and cautiously like a child. I promise you it's WORTH it.

Alright. You've done that stuff? Now - and ONLY now - you have the right to bring Naruto into it and have him be sad, eventually making Sakura sad also because she's only human and so can't make everyone happy (even if she wishes she could)! You've EARNED that right because you tried to paint the characters as people! I appreciate that and I promise to repay you by caring about it at least a little!

So now you can come up with a tragic or (and here's an absolutely crazy idea) happy fate for these characters. So many ideas fly into my head even though this is not a concept I even remotely feel like writing. You could have there be a crisis and Duckman dies protecting them in the ultimate repentant act of loyalty to his friends with the hope that they would end up happy together. You could have him start LYING to Sakura (and Naruto) that he just has no interest in being with her any longer. You could have him be a little colder and just bluntly push Sakura towards Naruto, which might make Sakura feel awful about herself, and he then has to deal with a unified Naruto and Sakura being angry/bitter that he treated her like a pawn...

Wait, that's really, really GOOD! Think about it! It would be just like Ducks to not even realize that he was doing something cruel! For the first time, he was really trying to do something selfless for his two friends, but they HATE what he did and might NEVER FORGIVE HIM for it! And he doesn't even understand why since he had noble intentions! He was hurt/betrayed/left alone unexpectedly like Itachi all over again! And he doesn't understand what happened just like he didn't understand what really happened with Itachi! So it's not only thematic, but also ironic, sad, and just plain COOL! That's a REAL and INSPIRED tragedy you wouldn't even normally allow yourself to write! And all you had to do was think about someone a little differently! See how great this can be?

Hmm... You could also have him surrender her, because he felt he HAD to (for whatever reason you want)... But he wasn't REALLY okay with doing so. Then it starts to tear him up inside leading to HORRIBLE results for everyone! But then he sees how much Sakura (now/always/whatever you want) loves Naruto (for instance on the battlefield after he almost kills him with some ridiculously overpowered attack. Like I hinted at before, DON'T be self-conscious and just allow yourself to HAVE FUN) and this helps him to cope with it because he really DOES love Sakura! Or maybe he can move on because he sees that he didn't truly love her now that he has something to compare it to! He's still learning about people/life, which is okay! Naruto and Sakura will forgive him for hurting them since he's still their precious friend and now the three of them can grow together! He can redeem himself later by protecting them/their child/whatever if you want and you find that poignant! Or maybe he can't move on and Sakura has to sacrifice herself! (to death or simply the altar of duckassery) Or another girl or even boy helps him through it and then he falls hard for them since he was touched by how they still cared about him despite feeling like a monster after he selfishly hurt his friends! Or maybe they all die! Or maybe they don't!

There are so many things you could do! You could combine these ideas and others! These were just some ideas in which the Duckster would do something! He's the craziest, but someone else could do something crazy instead/too! You can raise or lower the stakes as much as you'd like and I promise you it'll be really fun! You've gained so many options by expanding your perspective just a LITTLE, and mostly just in regards to ONE character! The one and only (and now lovable and awesome, thanks to the care you've shown) Ducky McQuack!

Point is, you have the beginning and ideas for a (potentially) great story! You can do ANYTHING, and you still have Naruto and Sakura because you didn't ruin them! On top of that, you've even turned Ducky into someone that you might like a lot too! That's THREE characters that you can enjoy! Eventually it'll become as many as you want, because this approach works on characters not named Ducky as well!

You want to know how you managed to do all this cool stuff? Simple. You refused to give in to your temptation to short-sightedly force yourself into the premise: "My characters decide to completely stop acting like themselves, or even like people at all. Surprisingly, it doesn't work out for them." One which will NEVER WORK because I as the reader will end up being FAR more bothered by this than anything you want me to be bothered by. Unlike you, I was not against what Kishimoto did because of a pairing, but because it made NO SENSE to me. If you ALSO approach this in a way that makes no sense, it's WORSE because you are willing to do and show things that he would not. Things that I find appalling (or at best appallingly idiotic.)

So I will not view it as a tragedy but as FARCICAL STUPIDITY. It may make me feel BAD to read it but not because I am MOVED by it, rather because I find it NAUSEATING, or in the best case scenario, I'm being emotionally MANIPULATED by your INFURIATING decision to torture AUTOMATONS who have evidently MURDERED and BUTCHERED two characters that I like because they wanted to WEAR THEIR FACES AS MASKS.

Know that there are very few things in existence that bother people more than something that is VERY CLOSE to being a person without ACTUALLY being one. Consider for example the uncanny valley effect, by no means a concept of literature and unrelated but quite interesting. You may as well write Naruto and Sakura as zombies or robots for all the difference it would make!

It's not only better, but also EASIER to have your characters live and breathe. A lot of things just happen naturally by thinking about how a typical, flawed (but relatable and human!) person would react to a situation. Even if you make a mistake and they're out of character (as in OOC for how YOU think they are, not Kishi and DEFINITELY NOT SOMEONE ELSE), the reader will appreciate that you tried! And you don't have to be this busy puppeteer dangling these goddamned CORPSES on STRINGS.

Sorry... I wasn't listening. Too full of myself. What did you say?

I wasted my time? You didn't get past the first step? Having to think about how a pairing that you dislike might work?

Oh. Well, don't expect me to read, then.

Making a long, LONG story short, I cannot enjoy something simply because it (supposedly) includes a certain pair of characters and I don't see how anyone can.

To be perfectly clear: I do not care about adhering to any specific NaruSaku-associated themes or ideas nor do I care about adhering to any part of the canon beyond what was already established. I don't consider myself a quote unquote "fan" of this pairing or any other and I in fact cannot stand the idea of being one. I like them and that's ALL. If you are or if you're holding my work to that (or any) standard, you may not like what I've chosen to do.

I realize I may have said more than some wanted to know (about this story's Sakura or about the pretentious bastard who wrote her), but I'm hoping it explains why a sentiment like "Naruto is the one who takes charge in the bedroom" sounds INCREDIBLY DUMB to me despite how reasonable it is! I never realized that the character of Naruto was the inspiration for Christian Grey. Even if the canon had established this (try to count all the reasons why this is not the case. You won't be able to), I don't understand why this would matter to me or anyone else who's writing THEIR IDEA. Why wouldn't you just do what you feel like doing?!

I'm not exaggerating when I say that presenting this as advice sounds like an attempt at COMEDY to me. And as criticism would be even FUNNIER. It's so ridiculous. As if my response is going to be to whip out a clipboard and start taking notes: "Hmm... I see... So next time I want to have a scene where Sakura ends up directing or comforting Naruto in some small way, because it strikes me as really sweet and poignant under the circumstances... I actually CAN'T do that, and I should instead write something that doesn't appeal to me as much! Got it."

Had to take a break here because I was about to die (from laughing.) If what I wanted was the exact atmosphere that someone else likes, why would I even have to do ANYTHING? I'd just save myself the effort and enjoy reading whatever they wrote!

Wait... They probably didn't write anything. Even if they did, for some reason I doubt it's very enjoyable. But I'm just being an asshole now. If I wasn't already. Which I think I was. Sorry. I guess I'm just as bad as Ducky. I swear neither of us can help it!

By this same token I also don't care if things are realistic/healthy or not. I've had some kind people state that certain aspects or parts of the story strike them as quite realistic or relatable to real life in some way. Thank you, but as Sakura would say, I don't deserve it. It isn't something I find overly important. If it is for you... Well, I have good news and bad news. Bad news first: Some lapse of judgment compelled you to read "Sakura Ressentiment"... But the good news is that you'll love my other fine literary work entitled "OMG, Sakura Just Became A Real Life Person!"

I just had other priorities. Much like how I'm not preoccupied with how to make Sakura's hair blue, because I feel she'd want it to stay pink. If you want that, go and read someone else's blue-haired Sakura. Now and in the future, it makes no sense at all to tell me that Sakura's hair should be blue, or even worse, that I have neglected to make her hair blue or even failed in my obvious authorial vendetta to give Sakura blue hair. Because I'm not and never was interested in that.

In summation and at the risk of being repetitive: I'm writing (or TRYING to write...) what I want to see. If you happen to want to see that TOO, that makes me quite happy, but I will NOT remove even a single comma that I really like even if every other person in the WORLD says it would be better without it. Nor would I ADD a comma that I do NOT like even if doing so would make me a LIVING GOD. I would rather not write anything than taint what I truly wanted to see by CAPITULATING to people. If you consider yourself a fanboy/girl of this pairing and you ASK FOR or even SILENTLY EXPECT such a thing...

Know that you are a HYPOCRITE. I will NOT explain why as this is too long ALREADY. The reason seems obvious to ME... But maybe it really isn't since my thinking is so strange and alien! Regardless, ASK SOMEONE. The point is not that you are but that I cannot understand WHY you would be/think this way. This should not make you feel bad as it's become clear that I understand VERY LITTLE.

Finally (FINALLY), I regret that I am so fucking stubborn as an author that when I'm writing, it's just damn the torpedoes and I couldn't care less about the consequences of using certain language if I like the way it sounds at the time. Just wanted to let people know what I was doing with the whole "Oh, always stay with me, never go away ever, you're mine" thing. Or any of its variants. Rereading, I noticed that I have the sophomoric tendency to bash on the same emotional themes over and over again like a psychotic broken record. I feel horrible because I KNOW this is going to be hard to accept. But I'm here to help you through it!

I want to start by extending my sincerest apologies to the hundreds, thousands, or most likely millions of you by whom I... was called a genius... /Neji

Heh. Sorry, but I just don't care (Hey, it's repetitive just like the story!) how incendiary this might seem. Trust me, if this seems harsh to you, it seems just as bad or even worse to me. But know that I am not someone who will try to break down a brick wall by smashing my head against it. If I don't have a ladder, I'm stuck. I know that and I am not going to apologize for being what you'd call "not an idiot." If someone DOES bash down the wall with their head (sounds like something Naruto would do), even witnessing it doesn't help me because I'm never going to understand how they did it.

See what I'm trying to say? To offer or argue for a lot of these points is going to be an entirely fruitless endeavor because I CANNOT MAKE SENSE OF WHY YOU WOULD EVEN BEGIN TO FEEL THAT WAY. The only thing you can do is attempt to dismantle the way I view or portray something, which even if you succeed, I still won't be swayed to your side as I would rather be BLIND than see things in the myopic way that you do. Go try to put out a forest fire by spitting on it because it would be less FUTILE.

I am not sure if I have been too subtle about the fact that I don't like pairing fandom or the idea of being a part of it. But if it was unclear, none of this was directed at anyone in particular (to be honest I have a terrible memory for usernames and who has said what even WITHOUT time away), simply the general sentiment that exists.

Anyways, that's all. C'mon, don't complain. I warned you it was gonna be like this. I hope some of it was of interest to you! If not, then as I said I'm posting more very soon so maybe that will interest you? If you know that it won't because we have no common ground, don't worry! I swear that I can at least understand THAT. There's a limit to how dense I can be!

And thank you very much for taking the time to read what I wrote.

By that I meant the story itself... Sakura Ressentiment... Not this monstrous thing... But thanks for that also!

You knew that? Oh...

Well, that makes things awkward... I guess I should leave, finally.

But it was you guys who made it awkward by letting me do all the talking...

Okay, fine... Fine! I'm going.

... Uchiha Sasuke.

K now I'm really gone.

-Dismal