Years and Memories

Chapter 30-5 weeks later

It was Hannah's wedding day and Mike had gotten up early with Charlotte and just couldn't go back to sleep. Hannah had stayed the night with them and Mike had watched her sleep. He remembered having the same emotions on Grace's wedding day but it was a little different with Hannah because in a lot of ways; Hannah and he had a totally different relationship than Grace and he did. Slowly but surely, he was developing a better relationship with his oldest daughter.

There had been a point in his relationship with Hannah that she wouldn't have wanted him to walk her down the aisle. Fortunately, they had fixed things and developed an extremely close father-daughter relationship and a closer friendship. It was something that Mike wanted to replicate with his other kids.

Things had slowly gotten better with Max, mostly because Polly had essentially worked as a middle person to fix things. Max loved his mom and desperately wanted her to be happy and Polly used that to her advantage to push Mike and Max into a closer relationship.

Charlotte was growing so fast that Mike and Polly had moved her into her nursery a week before. Despite having a developmental disability; she was far advanced; already holding her head up with no assistance and rolling from her back to her belly. Once she got rolled over; she was a little like a turtle laying upside down because she hadn't figured out how to roll from her belly to her back. The new pediatrician had no explanation for why Charlotte was so far ahead for only being six weeks old.

Once Mike was convinced that Charlotte was settled for the remainder of the night, and he checked on the rest of his sleeping family, he sit down at the kitchen island with a cup of coffee and his notepad. He wanted to write Hannah a note telling her what he wouldn't be able to hold it together long enough to verbally tell her.

"Hannah,

Today is your wedding day and at one point in your life; I would have probably not been invited to your big day, let alone; walking you down the aisle. I thank God every day that you forgave me and we were able to move past all that crap.

I have a relationship with you that I would love to have with my other kids. I am your father first but you and I have something that I really don't have with all the others. We have an unbelievable friendship. It is something I would love to replicate with the others but I also love how unique it makes our relationship. Polly and Tom are supposed to be my 'best friends' but you are also on that list, maybe even at the top.

There are so many reasons why I am proud to be your father. Your selflessness, your personality, and all the things you do for our family and all the people that you love and even people you don't even know.

I have been proud to call you my daughter your entire life; even when I wasn't so good at being your dad. I know that your mom is looking down at you today and every day and is as proud of you as I am. You are so like her and I love that about you. It is a constant sweet reminder and one I need.

So, I am giving you away today to Sam but please know, I am not giving you away. Grace told me when I gave her away that you can't give away someone that you'll always have. That goes for you too.

I love you more than life itself and always have,

Daddy"

Mike took the envelope with the letter in it and put it on Hannah's dresser and then walked towards his own room. He'd peeked in and Charlotte had woke herself back up but was watching her mobile. Mike knew it was only a matter of time before the baby let everyone know she was awake and so he picked her up and carried her into their bedroom, not even bothering to put her in the bassinet. Instead he laid back down next to his sleeping wife and let Charlotte lay on his chest, giving him sloppy kisses.

Polly cuddled into his side and Mike wrapped his free arm around her. She was still recovering from a procedure the week before to clean up the mess created from Charlotte's birth. She had had her tubes tied so there would no more babies for her and Mike. They had both agreed it was for the best. Psychologically speaking, it might take both Mike and Polly to get through the trauma but they were getting slowly better. Things were getting better with Max, mostly because Max adored his mother and she wanted things fixed. He wanted to make her happy which meant fixing things with Mike.

Mike cuddled with Charlotte for probably an hour before Polly woke up. As soon as Charlotte saw her mommy looking at her, she gave Polly a massive smile. She loved Mike but Charlotte was a mommy's girl. Charlotte loved skin to skin contact so since they had a half hour before they had to get up, Mike took Charlotte's sleeper off and Polly adjusted her nightgown so that Charlotte could have some 'Mommy time.' It was a calming thing for Charlotte that Polly did at least once a day and Charlotte loved it.

"I love this sleeper on her. It's one of the ones Grace got. The little rosebuds are just so cute. She's growing out of it though. I kind of hate that." Mike said as he held the little brown sleeper with pink rosebuds up. If he had his way, Charlotte would be in that same sleeper all the time.

"Don't worry. I found one the next size up, actually I went ahead and just got the same sleeper for her to wear until she's a year old. I thought the cashier thought I was crazy but I love it too. The dress that Hannah picked out for her today also has little rosebuds on it." Polly told Mike as she kissed the top of Charlotte's head.

"It won't hurt my feelings if Grace and Ryan have a girl. The sleepers can be handed down to her then. How are you feeling?" Mike asked her as he leaned down and kissed Polly.

"Good. Thank you for getting up with her through the night. That helped a lot. You ready for today? You've done this before but this is Hannah. You and her are different then you and Grace." Polly asked as she adjusted Charlotte. The baby was trying to nurse even though she had just had a bottle and Polly wasn't producing any milk.

"I will cry just like I did with Grace. At least I have a few more years before I do this again with Gabby or Rebecca. Charlotte, Mommy's not got any milk for you anymore. Those boobies are all for Daddy now but I'll let you lay on them." Mike told Charlotte with a laugh as he bent down and kissed her cheek. Polly had also let a laugh.

"Don't worry, Charlotte, it's only if Mommy lets Daddy have these boobies. I would be perfectly fine with it just being you. What do you think, baby girl? Should we let Daddy have some fun sometimes?" Polly said it with a teasing tone and winked at Mike. Charlotte gave them a big sigh and a pout. "Not sure if that was a yes or a no. I will take it as a yes…tonight."

"Will you be okay? I don't want to hurt you." Mike asked Polly. He would wait as long as Polly needed because he knew that she had had a lot of medical treatments and there had been a lot of trauma.

"I won't know for sure until we try something. I may have to stop you but I also want this with you. Not sure I will fit into that pink nightgown again though." Polly told Mike quietly and he leaned down and kissed her again.

"I don't care about the nightgown. The last time you wore it, I took it off pretty quickly anyway. You'll lead tonight. Ready to get up? Little Miss thinks she needs to nurse and she just ate a full bottle." Mike asked Polly as he sat up in the bed, ready to take Charlotte.

"Yeah, here, take her so I can adjust." Polly handed Mike the baby, who immediately let her opinion known. Polly quickly put the nightgown back the way it had been and began getting ready for the day. She was serving Hannah and Sam their first communion as a couple, just as she had done with Ryan and Grace.

By noon, all the kids were ready to go to the church. The wedding was at one and Hannah and Polly had been gone, preparing all day. Hannah had apparently read Mike's letter because when she came out for breakfast, she gave Mike a huge hug and a kiss on the cheek.

The younger kids all ran off in different directions and Max and Matty headed for the kitchen in hopes they could talk their Aunt Maggie out of some food. Mike carried Charlotte up the stairs so that he could get dressed and ready. Hannah was forcing him to wear a tuxedo. Polly had it hanging in adjoining Sunday School room, next to the room where they were getting Hannah ready in and she also had a playpen set up for Charlotte. Mike quickly dressed, all while watching Charlotte trying to roll from her belly to her back and getting quite mad at herself. He remembered on Grace's wedding day, Rebecca had only been a few days old, and so it was an odd juxtaposition. Giving away his oldest and then holding his youngest baby. Now, Rebecca wasn't the youngest anymore but the feeling was the same. Polly came in as Mike was trying to tie his bow and button his cufflinks. She immediately started helping him and he admired her light purple dress.

"You look absolutely beautiful. You may just show the bride up." Mike said it as he kissed her, trying not to smudge her makeup.

"Wait until you see her. She is absolutely beautiful. Gabby came in a few minutes ago and said she looked like a porcelain doll. It's actually a pretty accurate description. I always thought Grace was a beautiful bride but I think Hannah just outshined her. There, now she has an equally handsome man walking her down the aisle." Polly told Mike and then grabbed their youngest daughter and walked Mike to the adjoining room. Grace was standing with Hannah, helping her put on the pearl necklace that Christine had worn on her and Mike's wedding day. It was the same one that Grace had worn on her own wedding day and Hannah had worn the day Mike and Polly got married. As soon as Grace saw Mike, she gave him a huge smile. She was almost five months pregnant with twins and looked miserable but happy.

"She is all but ready, Daddy. I know you said I looked so much like Mom on my wedding day but I kind of think Hannah looks even more like her. We'll give you a few moments." Grace told Mike as she finished clipping the necklace. Mike gave her a kiss on the cheek and Grace, Polly and Charlotte left Mike alone with Hannah. She turned around and Mike honestly thought he was looking at Christine, thirty years before.

"God, you are so beautiful. The gown even looks similar to your mom's." Mike said with tears rolling down his cheeks. The dress was eerily similar to Christine's, with a more modern cut.

"Maggie actually made the dress. I couldn't find one that was just right and so I took her a picture of Mom's. We did modernize it slightly but it's essentially the same dress. And the veil is Grace's, earrings belong to Polly and Sasha gave me the clips for my hair. Of course, the necklace is Gram's." Hannah told Mike quietly as she wiped the tears off his cheeks.

"It's gorgeous. You ready for this?" Mike asked Hannah.

"I am. I was just going to ask you the same question though. You look so handsome." Hannah told him as she fixed his collar and put a flower in his button.

"Hmm. You have jokes. Let's do this." Mike told Hannah as he put the veil over Hannah's face and settled her hand on his arm. Ryan had already knocked on the door and the sanctuary was packed with all of Hannah's many friends and students. It struck Mike that a year before she had been fighting cancer and now he was getting to walk her down the aisle.

At the end of the aisle, he gave Sam the same look that he had given Ryan several years before. He lifted Hannah's veil and gave her a kiss on the cheek, feeling every bit as emotional as he had when it had been Grace.

The service was a lot faster paced than Grace's had been, mostly because of the number of people in the crowd with developmental disabilities. Polly had served them communion and there was plenty of humor thrown in.

The traditional first dance for the couple was fast and upbeat and then it was Mike's turn to dance with Hannah. She picked the same song that Grace had used for her dance with Mike at her wedding, a song called "Butterfly Kisses." Mike had the same reaction as he had dancing with Grace.

After, he danced with Polly, Grace, and both Gabby and Rebecca. He finally sit down at one of the reception tables and watched Max dancing with his mom. Mike was holding Charlotte who was sound asleep and he felt Tom sit down next to him.

"Took them long enough to get to this day." Tom said as he watched Hannah and Sam across the room.

"Would you have rather they married right out of high school? I like that they waited. It gave them both a chance to grow up." Mike said with a smile. He and Tom had had the same argument before.

"I guess you're right. Give it a few years though, might be Rebecca and Jed next." Tom pointed towards the two young kids who were still in grade school as he said it. Mike groaned but he was probably right. Rebecca and Jed, when they weren't fighting, they were best of friends. Tom's youngest; Nora and Tommy were also close. Mike was foreseeing more weddings in the future.

"And there's Nora and Tommy. I am really happy to see Ashley here. She loves being in the Peace Corps. It was the right fit for her after she got out of the Navy and who is that British guy?" Mike asked Tom as he watched the oldest Chandler daughter and the plus one she had brought to her brother's wedding.

"His name is Peter. He was a British Marines field combat medic. He's become a doctor since. I actually like him but don't tell Ashley that. He is trying to talk Sam and Hannah to join them in the Peace Corps. They are intrigued." Tom told Mike quietly. Mike and Tom both hated the idea. Sam had plans of joining a small family practice while Hannah taught as a special education teacher.

"I hope not but I can also see where a year or two in the Peace Corps would be great for them. They are both so selfless. As long as they came home quicker than Grace and Ryan did. It isn't fun having a kid across the world." Mike said quietly. The five years that Grace had been with Ryan following him between Italy, Spain and Ireland had been hellish for Mike and he and Grace weren't as close as he and Hannah were.

"Well, Hannah would miss you too much. She loves Sam but you are her best friend. She would be back within a year. You wouldn't like that year much but it's only a matter of time that the kids don't all start moving on. I am shocked that Max got you talked in going on his Tiger Cruise this summer and Polly went along with it." Tom said it with a smile. It had been a bit of an argument but Polly didn't want her sixteen year old son to go alone.

"Guess who the CO and XO are? Greene and Burke. I almost had a heart attack. I never thought those two would make that." Mike told Tom with a laugh.

"It's their first cruise so they will probably have you in the pilot house, helping. Kara Greene has made Admiral. Our big reunion last year should have told you all this." Tom told Mike.

"I was a little preoccupied. We had just been given Charlotte's diagnosis. We should do that yearly though. The reunions?" Mike said it with a look to Tom. He had actually been thinking about it since the year before.

"I was thinking the same thing. It was a good time." Tom told Mike as he stood up. The crowd was clearing out and clean up was beginning.

"You clean. I am just going to sit here, holding this sweet baby girl." Mike told Tom with a laugh. Charlotte was sound asleep and Mike didn't mind in the least.

"Well, that sweet baby girl is drooling all over your tux. Besides, remember who the CO was during our time? Me? And it's you giving orders? How'd that happen?" Tom was joking and Mike knew it. Today, they were just simply celebrating their kid's big day. Tom walked away and Mike concentrated on the way Charlotte was blowing bubbles with her drool in her sleep. All of his kids had done that and Mike found it fascinating. As he was watching her, Hannah came up beside him and shook his knee with her hand.

"Hey, Daddy. Sam and I are getting ready to leave. I just wanted to stop by and give you a hug and kiss. Tell you how much I love you. I loved your letter this morning. I do want to say something about it though; you said you liked how our friendship made our relationship so unique? I think you need to strive to have the exact same relationship with all of the kids. It's what makes you so unique. You are our dad first and foremost but I personally love having you as a friend. I know the other kids would love it too." Hannah said it and then reached over and kissed Mike on the cheek and gave Charlotte a kiss on the forehead.

"I've been thinking the same thing. I love you too, Sissy. More than you could ever imagine. So, how serious are you and Sam about this Peace Corps thing?" Mike asked Hannah quietly.

"Pretty serious. I spoke with Principal Hayes and he thinks it's a good thing to have on my resume, not that I plan on quitting. It will be in the Sudan with Ashley and her…whatever he is. They need doctors and teachers. The school is giving me a year off to do this." Hannah told Mike with a slight tone of sadness.

"God, I am going to hate this but I can see you doing this. It'll be good for both of you. Sending Grace to Spain was rough but this will be hell. Sudan. When do you leave?" Mike hated asking and Hannah gave an even sadder look.

"Dad, this is goodbye. We leave tomorrow. It all happened really fast and it was when we could get the approval. I didn't know for sure until this morning. I've talked to everyone but I knew you would be the hardest to say goodbye to. Ashley tells me I might be able to get occasional calls out and you will be my only call. Letters are the best mode of communication but it will take weeks. Daddy, I really want to do this. I know this is hurting you. I spoke with Doc and he is positive I will be fine. I just had a good checkup and I as soon as I get back, I'll have another. Please." Hannah said it with a begging sound.

"You're an adult. A married woman. I don't need to give you permission. You have my blessing and I will count down every second of every day until you get home. I will ask for one more thing." Mike said as he stood up and passed Charlotte over to Polly who had walked up.

"Anything." Hannah was wiping tears as she said it and Mike was near tears.

"One more hug before you go and a promise. You HAVE to come back safe and sound when it's time." Mike said as he pulled Hannah into a tight hug. He didn't care about wrinkling his tuxedo or her dress at that point.

"I will, Daddy. I will." Hannah told him as she leaned her forehead against his. She finally pulled away because it was time to go. "Daddy, I will be back. And I will write as soon as I can. Take care of yourself."

She finally walked away and when Mike looked across the room he saw Sam and Tom hugging. Polly gave him a soft smile and wiped the tears off his cheeks with her free hand. Charlotte was awake and gave him a pout. It was pretty much exactly how he felt. He watched Hannah and Sam walk out of the gym and his heart was broken, much as it had been when Grace and Ryan left his house on the way to Spain. He would be counting the days until he could hold her again.

Okay, done! It kind of went in a direction I wasn't anticipating. I obviously left it open for a reason. I WILL pick it up again. Please review and enjoy!