Author's note: Well, time for another new fanfic. This time, it's for Kids Next Door, one of the best shows from my childhood. This fic went through so many different changes when I was planning it. The form it is now is almost an entirely new fic from what it originally was, but I think this version might work better than the original anyway. Just a heads up before you read this: you'll want to see the "leaked" G:KND footage before you read this. I only mention it because it's pretty crucial to the plot. Don't worry, I'll wait. Go ahead. This fic isn't going anywhere. Watched it? Good, let's get started.
OPERATION: C.H.O.S.E.N.O.N.E
Chosen Human Operative Selects Either Naughty Or Nice Ending
"So this is the Earthling Operative that was selected?" whispered Numbuh Ordinal, watching the bald child below them. "Are we sure about this?"
"Numbuh 74.239 seems to think it's him," said Numbuh Negative Umpteen in response. "And you know what Numbuh Gajillion is like when Numbuh 74.239 tells him he's sure of something."
Numbuh Ordinal shivered. "Don't remind me," he said. "Still…the Earthling hesitates. He simply needs to put his booger into the console, and the problems on his planet will be resolved. Are we sure…"
"Shh," hushed Numbuh Negative Umpteen, indicating the platform below them.
Nigel Uno was giving a salute, a tear rolling down his face. "GALACTIC KIDS NEXT DOOR RULE!" he yelled, plunging his booger into the console.
All around the room, cheering erupted from all every operative. Except for one voice, screaming for Numbuh One's attention. "NIGEL!" Chad cried out. "Your friends…your family…do you know what you've done to them?"
Numbuh One's face betrayed no emotion, except another tear coming from under his visor. "Take him to the cells," he ordered. "We should have decommissioned him back on Earth when we had the chance."
"NIGEL!" yelled Chad. "DON'T DO THIS!" Two large alien guards appeared behind him. "Nigel, please…"
"Let's go, teenager," snarled one of the guards, dragging Chad down a dark corridor. "Numbuh Gajillion will want to see to your decommissioning personally. Then you can go home to your precious planet. Or what's left of it." The two guards laughed as they dragged Chad out of sight.
Nigel wiped away another tear, then left the room himself. It's for the best, he thought to himself. It's for the best. The guys from Sector V will forgive me…won't they?
He only wished he could convince himself that that was true.