Jiraiya tripped.

He was a legendary sannin; he did not merely trip like some washed out academy student. He was the legendary toad sage, the crusher of armies, and the number one desirable of women everywhere. He did not merely trip.

Yet he did.

Looking back on the dirt road the man looked at what he'd tripped over. It was a steely gray figure, about the size and proportion of a plush toy. The strangest part was its star-shaped head with three tags hanging of the corner like an Akatsuki hat. A line which looked suspiciously like an eyelid was present on its stomach.

The creature floated upwards. "Jirachi…" it moaned.

Jiraiya blinked; it was weird. But he had seen so much weirder in his lifetime of being a shinobi. And somehow he got the impression that the creature was complaining about being tripped over. "Sorry?" he apologized, wondering if he was reading it right.

Naruto was heckling over the fact that he, a legendary shinobi, had just tripped out of the blue. There was going to be another ravine in his future: a wider one that Gamabunta wouldn't fit in.

"Woah, what is that thing?" Naruto murmured, amazed, when he had stopped laughing like a loon. A finger reached out to poke it before retreating, thinking better of the idea.

"It's…" he had no clue. Like magic, Jiraiya remembered an old legend of a star-shaped puppet with an all-seeing eye that would grant any wish before departing for a thousand years. Coincidentally, the legend was a thousand years old.

Man were they lucky the Akatsuki hadn't found it. Or… any other shinobi village.

"I think it's The Wishing Star," Jiraiya guessed. "It grants any wish to the person who finds it."

Naruto nodded, like he was pretending to be intelligent and cultured. Moments later, an expression of abject horror creeped across his face. "And… you found it, pervy-sage?"

Why yes, yes he did. That would mean that the wish was his wouldn't it? Jiraiya giggled perversely as blood seeped out his nose. His imagination was best left unexplored.

"Aw man! C'mon strange-loo-I mean awesome-looking star thing! Don't doom the world to this guy's wish. Please, don't do it!"

The creature flew loops around Naruto's hands as he spoke. "Jirachi," it said before quickly making spirals around the genin.

"Is that your name?" Naruto asked, keeping one eye on pervy-sage.

It paused in its floating directly in front of Naruto's face. "Jirachi!" it chirped in affirmative.

Jiraiya broke from his perverse trance. "Alright then Jirachi-"

Naruto cut him off. "I won't let you pervy-sage! There's no way I can let you make even one pervy wish!" he shouted, his mind going straight into what he imagined Jiraiya's gutter looked like. He didn't like it; he didn't like it at all.

"Don't call me that!" he shouted back reflexively. "And damn it brat! The apprentice isn't supposed to oppose the master!"

Naruto's reply showed his intentions perfectly. "Multi-shadow clone jutsu!" Hundreds of copies flooded the roadside. "The apprentice always betrays the master when he's evil!" Naruto declared.

Well, he was pretty genre-savvy today, Jiraiya thought. "Being perverted isn't evil you closeted brat!"

Naruto was taken back, aghast. "I'm not a closet pervert!"

"That's exactly what someone in denial would say!"

"There's-there's no way I'm like you pervy-sage! All of my techniques are made to crush perverts!"

"Don't call me that! And I'd like to see you try, uppity brat! I'm a legendary shinobi and you're just a genin!"

"You're just an old man who can't admit it!"

"I'm not an old man! Fifty-one isn't old you worthless idiot!"

"Ugly toad!"

"Dead-last virgin!"

"Jirachi…"

"Loli lover!"

There was a pause, a long one. Some of Naruto's clones looked at him like they couldn't believe he'd just said that. A still-wind blew through; the only noise was the nervous rustle of the leaves of some nearby trees.

"Jirachi…"

"I… I've been called a lot of things. But not once in all my life have I been accused of being a loli-con," Jiraiya's trembling stopped. "You take the back, brat! My love of the mature female body knows no bounds! The bouncy breasts, luscious thighs, and voluptuous curves are infinitely appealing! To call me-"

"Put a sock in it you dirty old pervert! I'm doing the world a favor by keeping that wish away from you! Rasengan!" Naruto shouted as his pairs attacked the toad sage in groups of two.

"Needle Hell!" A rain of chakra-enhanced hair flew down upon the hordes of clones, popping them all like balloons. "You see brat, you can't beat me!"

The real Naruto pulled a single hair out of his thigh. "Maybe, but I couldn't live with myself unless I tried."

Jiraiya stared at his apprentice squatly. "You're making this way worse than it actually is. It'll probably just be one small-scale wish and I might get laid tonight."

"Jirachi-i-i…"

A clone popped into existence and tried to help Naruto make another rasengan until it was popped by another needle. "Damn it! You're not taking this serious enough!"

Sighing, Jiraiya flashed through hand seals. "Earth Style: Double Decapitation Jutsu."

Naruto was sucked into the dirt road like it was made of quicksand before stopping at neck level. "No…" he protested, imagination showing him the worst possible outcomes. Desperately trying to squirm out and see the strange creature and Jiraiya.

"Ah, don't be so melodramatic! It'll be over before you know it." Jiraiya stepped past Naruto to the strange creature. It bobbed and weaved, seemingly relieved that it was the center of attention once more.

"Don't do it Pervy-sage!"

"So Jirachi-"

The toad sage stopped himself as the eyelid on its stomach slowly peeled back. An eye with the universe in its iris glistened in the midday sun.

"Jiraiya," a deep, slow voice reverberated in his mind. "I have read your heart and know your deepest intentions."

Suddenly, the creature gained a presence. That sixth sense shinobi spent their lives cultivating told him that there was an infinite well of power contained in that eye. Jiraiya struggled to stand straight.

"Your worth has been proven. Your will shall be made manifest."

White brightness poured from the eye. The world was smothered in radiant light as everything became blank. White in all directions, it felt like staring into the sun. Even closing his eyes, the light burned and blinded just as bright.

"Pervy-sage, pervy-sage. What's going on? Pervy-sa-"

"*sniffle* This is perfect. Just perfect…"

Groggily, Naruto woke up. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and immediately noticed the other occupant in the room. She was a female, a very attractive one. Her appearance jarred his memory as Naruto remembered what happened before the world had flared white.

Jiraiya had one wish; there was an attractive woman in front of him dressed like a maid: it wasn't hard to put two and two together.

"Pervy-sage, what did you do?" Naruto muttered. He hoped that everything returned to normal like it so often did in his life.

The maid did notice him waking up. "Hello Master. Are you feeling alright?"

Master? "Yeah, I'm fine," Naruto declared, crawling out of the bed. It reminded him of a hospital; he instinctively was trying to escape.

"That's wonderful. If you need anything I'm yours to command." Even her voice sounded like liquid lust. Was he was stuck in Pervy-sage's fantasies?

Naruto tossed the blankets off, stood up, and stretched. He was going to find Pervy-sage as quick as possible and get answers. His eyes met the maid's. Her eyes were staring at his waist. Glancing down, he quickly realized that he was wearing nothing bar some extra lumber.

He looked back at the maid. She was still staring at his crotch. "C-can I get some clothes?"

"Of course, Master," she replied, still not breaking her stare. In a flurry of motion there was a maid costume thrown at him alongside a female set of underclothes.

Those were not the clothes he was looking for! Or wanted!

This really was a world straight out of Pervy-sage's fantasies! Naruto stopped for a moment to stare at the stacked and bare woman before snapping out of it. He fled, flying through the door with as much speed as he could muster.

He was also still naked.

Ignoring everyone he passed in the luxurious hallway was easier than he had expected. Instead of staring at him every single female (there were no males) stood entranced by his genitals. Throwing open an ostentatious door, he instinctively knew was Jiraiya's, he marched in.

He was greeted with live porn.

Naruto stopped to stare. There were six female occupants with various looks and one sole male. A handsome, young man with a long mane of snow-white hair. That was Jiraiya: much younger. Those were naked women, all of them looking ruffled and debauched.

They were having sex.

His mind took a moment to realize that he was watching Pervy-sage engage in intercourse. When it settled in, he resisted the urge to wretch and quickly hopped to the safe side of the door. He slammed it shut, ignoring the moans and groans coming from the room.

The hallway wasn't much better: every female was still staring at him. Worse, they were closing in, trapping him.

"Master Naruto," one of the bustier maids moaned; Naruto could almost hear the "sching" of a sword leaving its scabbard.

No, he wasn't a pervert. He wasn't. He just wasn't. Naruto jumped to escape on the ceiling before falling on his face after achieving a couple feet of lift.

He didn't have chakra.

He didn't have chakra.

Naruto, reluctantly and hastily, opened Jiraiya's door to talk to him. He couldn't stall this any longer. Plus, this was the only way to escape the horde of women closing in on him.

Naruto looked at the porn mournfully, shutting the door behind him. "Pervy-sage, what did you do?" he screamed over the sexual soundtrack.

"Damn it! Don't call me-" the toad sage was cut off by a kiss.

"Pervy-sage," one of the women purred, "Are you going to unleash all of your natural, beastly desires onto me?"

That was a pretty cliche line; the author apologizes.

"Maybe later," the snow-haired man reluctantly, very reluctantly, denied. "I actually have to talk to this brat."

Six pairs of eyes dropped to his crotch. "He doesn't look too much like a brat," one of the women offered.

Jiraiya sighed mournfully as Naruto tried to hide his penis ineffectively.

"Are we really going to do this naked?" Naruto asked, brow twitching.

"Yup. I, uh, haven't bothered to find out where the clothes are," Jiraiya affirmed.

Naruto sighed, thoroughly sick of all the perversion already. He had given up.

"Ah cheer up you mopey brat. At least everyone acknowledges you now."

Acknowledgment like this was never what he had in mind. "For my penis."

Jiraiya shrugged haplessly. "There's worse things to be recognized for." He leaned back in one of the cushy armchairs. Definitely made to have sex in.

"Suppose I should explain myself. Well, I changed the world. There's no more chakra, no more death, and no more virgins."

Figures that Pervy-sage would consider virgins a tragedy. Naruto glared just for the sake of glaring.

"So I made a world of Pocket Girls, pokegirls, that need to have sex or they go crazy. They're stored in balls and come out whenever you're ready."

Naruto stared at his testicles, horrified.

"Not those balls brat. Pocket Balls."

There was a silence.

"Alright, I get it. That's still a euphemism for testicles. No, they're stored in red and white orbs that you keep on your belt."

And so Jiraiya explained his pervy world to a closet-pervert, and self-proclaimed anti-pervert, who was just too disgusted to react. There were lots of explanations, and lots of mopey, resigned glares.

How could anyone be so perverted?

End.

Enter the Preface

Given where I placed this crossover, a number of you readers may be entirely, or peripherally, aware of what a pokegirl is. I'll give you the short version: a bunch of virgin males who played too much pokemon got caught up in fantasies and created this. It's perverted as hell, and I felt the need to warn you what you're getting into.

Going onwards, it's almost expected that you know something about pokegirls, else you be completely lost. The explanation that I glossed over above that would help you, the readers, has been omitted because of laziness on my part, and I'd like to apologize for that. Part of the weirdness come from this supposed to have been a one-shot, but has since been upgraded to a full length fan-fiction.

And finally, the M rating will eventually come into play (as is to be expected), but not for a few more chapters at least. That said, sex is openly talked and joked about in a world like this, and the narrative is decidedly raunchy.

Thanks for giving this a try.

End.