He was lonely. So very lonely.

Taiyang Xiao Long had been through more than most men his age had been. He had been through more than most men period. Maybe even Professor Ozpin, and he had lived for thousands of years. That man may have been cursed by the gods to reincarnate forever in his never ending war against an evil Grimm hybrid lady, but at least he had not suffered the same tragedies that Tai had.

He had lost not one, but two of his sweethearts. Okay, so the first one had up and abandoned him shortly after giving birth to their daughter. It had been a stressful time for both of them. After all, being pregnant while in their final year of Beacon Academy had been humiliating. All of the other students could look and point at her growing baby bump and know that she had banged the Taiyang. And while Tai himself wore that knowledge as a badge of pride, it had been torture for Raven herself. It was little wonder that she ditched him shortly after giving birth to Yang.

Then there had been Summer Rose. AKA, the backup plan. Supposedly Qrow had been into the girl himself, but every time he had attempted to ask her out some distracting and unfortunate event seemingly came out of nowhere and stopped him. Once he had slipped on a banana peel and fractured his stirrup bone. It was on that day that Taiyang learned the anatomy of the human ear. Another time Qrow had been about to talk to Summer privately, but in an ironic twist a passing bird flew overheard and dropped a bomb on his head, spoiling the romantic overture. From that day on Qrow vowed that he would only use his own powers for good and not evil.

But while Qrow was busy trying to learn to fly without crashing into the tantalizingly clear windows of Beacon Academy, Tai was making his moves on Summer. And he got her. Another fine lady from his team tagged and bagged. Soon enough they had a kid together as well. And soon enough Summer died.

Tai's heart level had been reduced to critical levels after that loss. Abandoned by one girl so she could go live in brutal squalor on another continent, and abandoned by another girl so that she could die? Was he really that bad of a guy? He didn't think so. But at least he had two incredible daughters to show for his loss. Sure, they had their own problems, like Yang's anger issues. Or Ruby's alarmingly increasing squeaky voice. But they were his girls. He would never stop loving them no matter how many problems they had.

Still, a lonely heart could only take so much. Soon enough Tai had taken to the world of online dating. LonelyHuntsman dot com had opened up a whole new world to men like him. In a profession where the mortality rate was higher than that of a professional planker, it was not uncommon at all for men and women to lose their significant others on missions.

Initial progress was slow, but with the help of Ruby and Yang, he had finally got a match. A beautiful, seductive and not at all evil young woman named iBurn had appeared, and she looked to be a very interesting person. Where Tai was a cool dude, she loved fire. She really loved fire. And that was good. What was the old saying after all? Opposites attract? She would be the fire to his ice. And they would make beautiful songs together.

But sadly Tai had not heard from her in months. After weeks of correspondence, iBurn had simply vanished. Just like Raven. Just like Summer. Was this just his lot in life? To fall in love and then be abandoned? Even his two daughters had abandoned him to go on their super important world saving mission. Maybe his mysterious online partner had a similar mission. After all, if she was on a dating site for lonely huntsmen, surely she had to be one of the good guys.

Maybe he should have gone through with his plan to snag Qrow, and thus complete his complete and total conquest of Team STRQ. Qrow wouldn't leave him. He was as dependable as Professor Ozpin. Everyone knew that Ozpin could be relied on and trusted with all his millennia of experience. Whoever had caused the downfall of Beacon Academy must have been a genius of the highest degree. That was the only explanation for Oz being caught so completely off-guard to the attack.

With a heavy sigh, Tai clicked to view his inbox on LonelyHuntsman dot com. Hoping against hope that this would be the day that iBurn messaged him, he eagerly awaited for the page to load. It was times like this that he lamented living in a log cabin in the middle of nowhere with horrendously slow internet speeds.

"Come on, come on..." he whispered to the empty air. Only Zwei was around, and he was currently asleep in his oversized dog bed in the living room.

But sadly there were no new messages. There never were. Only iBurn had ever shown a single iota of interest in the single dad. Most nights were spent alone, with only the temptation of Mistrali tentacle hentai to keep him company.

"Man, this sucks. I wish... I just wish I could talk to her again. We got along so well."

It turned out that Tai and the mystery woman had a lot more in common than they initially thought. Where he taught aspiring young huntsmen at Signal Academy, iBurn had told him that she had a pair of apprentices that she was training. Where Tai had an adorable pet dog, she also enjoyed the company of animals. She had even told him that at one point she had an entire menagerie of animals that were willing to do anything she asked. Clearly the woman must have had a way with cute and furry creatures, especially if they would go down into the tunnels of Mountain Glenn if she only asked.

Speaking of animals, the sound of Zwei barking stirred Tai from his thoughts. It must have been the postal courier again. "Zwei! Shut up!" he shouted.

The dog kept barking. That was when it hit him. Maybe there would be another letter from Ruby. Or something from Yang. Maybe his two girls had reunited and sent him something together!

There was a knock on the door now. Tai got up from his chair and rushed over to the front door. The tiny barking form of Zwei still stood there yapping away. He turned to look at the critter and raised a stern finger. "Zwei, sit," he ordered.

The dog did as he was told, and Tai moved to go open the door. When he did so he had to look down to see who had been knocking.

It was a woman. It was...

"iBurn?" he asked, his mouth hanging open. He could hardly believe what his eyes were seeing.

She was in bad shape. Wounded by the looks of it. Her exotic red dress was torn. She reached up at him with a quivering arm.

"Love... daddy..." she barely managed to squeeze out, before collapsing face first onto the ground.

A single eye slowly peeled open to reveal an unfamiliar room. Her body ached. Her head throbbed. She felt like she was recovering from the worst case of brain freeze she had ever suffered.

Cinder sat up gingerly, careful not to make any sudden movements. She had no idea if she had suffered any new injuries from her encounter with Raven Branwen. That woman had nearly killed her. She should have killed her too. It was only thanks to quick thinking that Cinder remembered that she could just thaw the ice she had been frozen in much like Raven herself had done. Then using her magical Maiden powers she had flown to safety. But she could not return to Salem. Not yet at least. After this latest failure it would not surprise her if her master decided to kill her and find a new Fall Maiden. There was only one place she could go.

Lovedaddy.

This was his home.

Glancing around the room, it looked like that of a child. Shelves mounted on the wall contained all manner of small Grimm toys. It almost felt like being back home in Salem's palace. That is, if Salem's place was a rustic and backwater cabin rather than a red and purple realm of darkness and foreboding evil. Considering she was used to such a place, it was almost comical that she felt as though her skin was crawling as she lay in this bed.

There were all kinds of little mementos and knickknacks littering the room as well. There were photographs. Cinder's heart skipped a beat when she saw just who was in them.

Ruby Rose.

This was her home as well. The girl who had maimed her once beautiful face. The girl who had taken her eye and her arm. That meant that Lovedaddy was Ruby and Yang's dad.

She didn't care about any of that, however. The fact that he was the father of both Ruby Rose and Yang Xiao Long did not change her feelings for him. If anything it helped the fire in her heart and in her loins burn with even more intensity. He may have been their father, but he was her daddy. What wonderful revenge it would be to become their stepmother.

A painful tingling was eating away at her left arm. It felt as though she was being watched by those piercing silver eyes of Ruby. She had to leave this bed. Ruby's bed. She had to find her Lovedaddy.

Throwing the blanket she was covered with to the side, Cinder slowly stood up from the bed. Relief washed over her throbbing Grimm arm almost immediately after. She glared back hatefully at the bed with one amber eye, and was tempted to burn the thing with a fireball. She resisted the urge, however. She did not want to risk burning Lovedaddy's home to the ground. At this point it was her only safe haven from not only her enemies, but her master as well.

The smell of something wonderful wafted through her nose, and Cinder was drawn to the kitchen. There she saw the man who was her salvation standing before the stove. The sound of a ladle stirring liquid and impacting upon the metal of a pot filled her ears. The delicious smell of chicken noodle soup made her mouth water. He must have been making it for her.

"Lovedaddy?" she asked. She was just thankful that her throat had not been injured again after this latest fight.

The man turned around to reveal a bright pink apron, on which the words 'Don't abandon the cook' were written. "iBurn!" he all but shouted, and rushed over to her. Cinder felt her heart flutter as he grabbed both of her hands in his own, and looked down at her concerned with gorgeous blue eyes. "Are you okay? What happened? How do you feel? You should be in bed right now."

She wasn't used to being bombarded by questions like this, and for a moment Lovedaddy seemed to be more of a manic lunatic than even Tyrian himself. However, she realized that he was merely concerned for her. She had shown up a wounded wreck at his doorstep, after all.

"I'm better now," she reassured him. Magical Maiden powers went a long way in healing one's injuries. "Just... please do not make me sleep in that bed again."

She did not know why, but the thought of lying in that bed again gave her chills, as well as flashbacks to the climactic battle at the ruined tower of Beacon Academy. As much as she would love to ravage and be ravaged by the father of Ruby in her own bed, something about it just gave her the creeps.

"Sure, anything you want," he said hurriedly. A wide and genuine smile spread on his face as he looked at her, but soon it slowly receded. "You look... different from your profile picture."

Of course she did. Back when she had made her profile on the dating site, she had not yet been injured by this man's daughter.

A lance of pain shot through her heart. He was going to comment on her missing eye. Or her Grimm arm. The whole jig was going to be up. She was going to be outed as an evil monster. Lovedaddy would not love her anymore.

"I..." she started hesitantly, not knowing what she should say at a time like this.

"Yeah, it's obvious," he said firmly. "You got a haircut!"

Cinder merely blinked with her one good eye.

"Yeah, that's it!" he exclaimed, and a smile returned to his face. "You have longer hair on your profile. But I gotta say, you pull off shorter hair really well too. I love it!"

The man pulled her into an unexpected hug, and for a moment Cinder was too shocked to do anything about it. But soon enough she returned the gesture, and both her human and Grimm arms wrapped around his much larger torso.

"I'm so glad you came to see me, too," the man continued. "When you didn't respond to me for months I thought I had done something wrong. But here you are, showing up at my home in your most desperate hour. I knew we had a connection. I knew that you felt the same way about me that I did you."

Cinder wasn't about to tell him that the reason she had not spoken to him for months was due to his own daughter nearly killing her during her genocidal attack on Beacon Academy and the city of Vale as a whole. No. He did not need to know that. He didn't need to know anything except her feelings for him. Ozpin and Salem. Relics and Maidens. None of those things mattered anymore. The only thing that was important was that they were together now. Lovedaddy and iBurn had finally met in person. The budding online romance that had been in the making for months had finally set sail.

"I do," Cinder purred as she buried her face deeper into his chest. She wanted to stay like that forever, but finally forced herself back so that she could look up at him. "Lovedaddy?"

"Yeah?"

"My name is Cinder."

He smiled, and it looked that there were tears forming in his eyes as he spoke. "I'm Taiyang. Call me Tai for short."

"I will... Tai."

The moment was interrupted when she heard the growling of a dog. Looking down, she saw a small corgi baring his teeth at her. He even chomped down on the bottom portion of her dress.

"Zwei!" Tai yelled, and causing the dog to abandon his quest to make her clothing a new chew toy. "You have to be nice to Cinder!" The man looked up and gave an apologetic look to her. "Sorry about that. Zwei doesn't have a lot of experience around new people. He'll warm up to you. He's a good dog."

Cinder nodded. She remembered from his online profile that anyone interested in him must like dogs. Specifically his dog. She would do so for his sake.

Tai gave her arm a soft tug as he beckoned her to follow him. He was surprisingly okay with grasping her twisted black appendage in his large human hand. "Come on, Cinder. Let's go get you back into bed. You can't be fully recovered just yet."

She was. However she did not want to tell him about her Maiden powers quite yet. Cinder felt as though she could go another round with that bitch Raven Branwen... Yang's mother. Tai's ex. The realization of how many of her enemies this man was connected to suddenly dawned upon the Fall Maiden.

"What about the soup?" she asked. Truth be told she was hungry, and the meal that Tai had been preparing to aid her in her recovery smelled wonderful.

"Soup can wait," he insisted as he tugged her along back toward the bedroom. Only she realized that they were not heading to the room she had woken up in. No, he was taking her to his own bedroom.

Cinder smiled. The fact that her Lovedaddy was so eager to take her to bed was not such a bad thing. Even if he did not have quite the same thing on his mind that she did.

She would take him. He would become hers. And she would become a part of his life. A part of Ruby and Yang's lives. Even a part of Raven's life. Because if she could not defeat those girls at their own game, then she would conquer them in hers. She would conquer him.

Raven Branwen was a defeated woman.

Not in the way one might expect. She had won in her battle of the ages against Cinder Fall. In a duel of Maidens, she had proved to be the superior one. Raven had got what she came for. The Relic of Knowledge was as good as hers.

Until her one-armed daughter showed up and called her out on her bullshit.

After being reduced to tears by her cripple of a daughter, Raven could not return to her tribe. They were all a bunch of losers anyway. Vernal, the only capable and competent member of the Branwen Tribe, was dead. Who was left? Shay D. Mann? Raven would sooner live in the middle of the Vacuan desert than spend the rest of her life with those no-talent nothings.

So she had made the decision to return to Vale. To go to a place she had not visited in many long months. Not since the last time she had checked in on her daughter during her long road to recovery.

She was returning to Patch.

Perched on a tree just outside of her former lover's cabin, she saw Tai down below gardening. The man did love that hobby of his. He loved flowers period. Deflowering, more specifically. He had done so with Summer Rose. He had done it with her. Like it or not, Tai just had a way with words when it came to the ladies. He had a way with other things too.

A quick booty call would go a long way in helping to regain her lost confidence.

Taking as deep a breath as a magical bird could, Raven swooped down from the tree branch on which she sat and transformed back into human form. With a graceful landing that had been perfected after dozens of hard and embarrassing crashes, the bandit leader stood mere feet away from her target.

Tai did not even have to look back to realize who had just appeared behind him. Raven saw how his back stiffened, and how his hands ceased their work on his garden. "Raven," he said evenly.

She did not expect there to be any love in his voice. She would not show any in kind. "Tai."

He turned around, but to her surprise there was not so much as a scowl on his face. He looked... happy almost. "Is there something I can help you with?"

Raven sashayed over to him, the provocative motions of her body only aided by the sultriness she put into her voice. A tone she had not used in so long. A tone that had been reserved only for him. "What, a girl can't stop by and say hi?"

She rested her hands upon his shoulders. The last thing she expected the man to do was push her away. "No," he told her. "Not anymore."

The woman's blood-red eyes blinked in disbelief. Was this the same Taiyang she once knew? The man who could get any girl he wanted? Herself included? No. Something was wrong. The fact that he was not pouncing on her right now and tearing her clothes off was proof enough of it. She knew for a fact that she could rock his world just as much as he could rock hers.

"What!" she finally managed to say. She had to be careful, lest her eyes blaze with bright red fire. "Why not?"

"Because I'm with someone," he said fondly. For a moment it looked as if his mind had wandered to some other world as his eyes looked off to the side dreamily. "Someone who makes me happy."

Impossible. Everyone knew it was Taiyang's lot in life to suffer. Every woman he had ever gotten with had left him for one reason for another. So who was this woman now that made him happy?

"I refuse to accept this," she protested. "Who would love a forty year old single father of two like you?"

His face twisted in anger for the first time. "Well if you must know, I met her online through a huntsman dating website. Unlike you, Cinder actually gets me on a deeper level that's not just based on sex."

Cinder? Cinder?

"What!" Raven shrieked. "Cinder? As in Cinder Fall?"

"As a matter of fact, yes. That is her name. How do you know her anyway?"

Raven knew she could utterly destroy their relationship by telling her ex-lover everything that the woman had done. And that was exactly what she would do.

"Because I fought against her when she tried to destroy Haven Academy and steal the Relic of Knowledge for her dark master Salem!" Raven explained. "She's evil, Tai. Pure evil. She even wants Ruby and Yang dead."

To her shock, Tai merely laughed. "Yeah, right," he said sardonically. "Like I'm going to believe anything my ex says about my current girlfriend." He tapped his head with a finger. "That's a smart move!"

She could not believe what she was hearing. Did Tai really think that the attempted assault on Haven was just her being a petty and jealous ex-girlfriend?

Raven shook her head and attempted to recollect her thoughts. "Tai, she has a Grimm arm! Did you not notice that?"

"Oh I noticed," he said nonchalantly. "And you know what? She still gives way better handjobs than you ever did."

Red eyes widened, and Raven gasped in disbelief. "That's not true!" She grabbed his wrist, squeezing down hard on it as she attempted to pull him toward the cabin door. "Come on. Get those pants off and let me prove it."

She was stopped dead in her tracks when Tai refused to budge from his spot. "Raven, you can't just disappear for eighteen years and then show up again one day demanding free handjobs."

"I'm demanding I give you one, you moron!"

"And it's still not going to happen!"

Raven squeezed her free hand into a fist. She could not believe how frustratingly unreal this whole situation was. "Come on. What's it going to take? A blowjob too? Full on intercourse? What do I have to do to make you say yes?"

"Look, I'm in a committed relationship. I'm not going to sleep with you."

Her lips curled into a snarl. "And I'm not going to let that whore beat me at anything!"

"Who's a whore now?" a third voice said unexpectedly.

Raven looked over to the door of Tai's home, where she saw a fully recovered Cinder Fall standing in the doorway. She wore a brand new mask over the left side of her face, which was again mostly covered by her hair. Her left arm was covered up as well, but she knew what twisted appendage lay beneath the cloth. Apparently Tai knew as well and had no issues with it.

The younger woman sauntered out to stand next to Tai, and one of her arms linked around his to bring them close. "Because the last thing I heard, you got knocked up during your final year at Beacon Academy." A look of mocking pity formed on that smug face of hers. "I can't imagine how embarrassing that must have been."

Now both of Raven's fists were clenched in anger. She couldn't believe this. The father of her daughter was sleeping with one of her mortal enemies. One of Yang and Ruby's mortal enemies as well. And worst of all, he actually preferred sex with that Grimm-fused monstrosity over herself!

This could not stand. This would not stand. Raven made a decision right there and then. She was not going anywhere. She would free her former lover from the dark grasp of Cinder Fall. She would get the booty call she so desperately desired.

Yang was ecstatic. She was finally returning home.

Fighting the forces of evil was hard and tiring work. It wasn't over yet, and there was still so much to do, but they had won a great victory at Haven Academy.

Now reunited with Ruby, they had decided to stop off in Patch before heading up to Atlas. They needed a little breather after a month of constant training. After the physically and emotionally draining Battle of Haven. They needed to visit their dad and rest. He needed to know his girls were okay.

He was going to be so happy to see them both out of the blue like this. It would be the best day ever for their dad. Both she and Ruby had so many stories to tell the man. She was sure he had things to tell them too. They would be able to sit down at the dinner table like a family once more, and talk and eat and laugh just as they always had. It would be perfect.

Opening up the front door, Yang stepped inside and announced her arrival. "Dad, we're home!"

"You bitch!"

Those were the last words Yang had expected to hear. The woman who had said them was the last person she had expected to find.

Correction. The second to last.

"What?" the chilling form of Cinder Fall asked innocently. "Did you want the last of the ice cream? I thought that a woman your age should be more conscious of her weight."

"Did you just call me fat?" Raven snarled.

Cinder waved off the question with a soft hand motion. "No, of course not," she answered calmly. "It's just that as we get older, our metabolisms slow down and we have to watch what we put into our bodies."

Yang looked wide-eyed at the two women. Lilac eyes went back and forth until she finally mustered the strength to speak. "M-mom?"

Raven turned, finally broken from her intense stare down with Cinder at the sound of her daughter's voice. "Yang?" she asked with equally wide eyes. "What are you doing here?"

"What am I doing here? What are you doing here?" she responded, like that was the only real question here. Again, she was wrong as she pointed an accusatory finger at Cinder. "And what is she doing here? Where's dad?"

As if on cue, the man in question stepped out of the kitchen and into the living room. "Yang?" he gasped. "Ruby?" He rushed over to pull both girls into the tightest hug the blonde girl had ever felt. "I'm so glad you two are safe!" he cried as he buried his head into the shorter girl's hair. "I'm so glad you're home!"

She wasn't about to ruin the mood by telling him that it was only temporary. Besides, there were more pressing concerns at hand. "Dad, what are they doing here?"

Pulling back, her dad had the biggest smile on his face that she had seen in years. "Oh, well your mother decided to stop by and stay with us for a little while. She says there was some sort of falling out with the tribe, and that she has nowhere else to go."

That... made sense. Sort of? Truth be told Yang had no idea what the situation of the Branwen Tribe was now. She knew that Vernal was dead. She knew that the rest of the members were even weaker Jaune had been in his first year at Beacon Academy. To be honest, they were probably all Grimm food by now.

Still, that did not answer the question about the more important of the women. "And her?" she asked, pointing at Cinder.

She saw how her dad smiled even harder before moving over to put an arm around the woman. "Yang, I'd like you to meet my girlfriend, Cinder."

Oh she knew Cinder. She knew the woman all too well. The person who was responsible for the fall of Beacon Academy, the deaths of Pyrrha and Penny, and who had attempted to destroy Haven Academy? How could her dad not know these things?

"But dad!" Yang protested. "She's evil!"

Tai gave a heavy sigh, and it looked as though his grip on Cinder tightened. "Yang, I know that the idea of potentially having a stepmother is hard. I know that all the fairy tales paint stepmothers as evil. But... Cinder's different. And I'd like for you to try and get to know Cinder on a more personal level, okay?"

Yang blinked. Was this for real? Did he not know who this woman was or what she had done? Did he not realize that she had a piece of Grimm attached to her body?

"Yeah, I know she's different!" Yang shouted. "Look at her! She has a giant stretchy Grimm claw for an arm!"

For the first time since arriving, her father frowned. "Yang Xiao Long, I am very disappointed in you." She was taken aback by his stern tone. Like he was disciplining her as he had done when she was younger. "As someone who lost her own arm, you're the last person I expected to judge another person because of their disability. I thought I raised you better than this."

A smug and evil sneer spread on Cinder's lips as she hugged the man even tighter. Her dad... he loved this woman. It was as clear as day. And apparently she loved him too. And her mother was back in the picture now too?

Just how much had happened since the attack on Haven?

"Now come on you two," Tai said to his daughters. "Get washed up and come to the dining room. Dinner is nearly ready."

She was too tired to argue. She was too shocked to do so as well.

Yang merely nodded, and ushered Ruby along so that they could go get ready to eat.

Life was perfect.

Sitting at the head of the table, Taiyang looked over the four most important women in his life.

Sitting closest to him on his left was Cinder. She looked radiant tonight. Her brand new mask was polished to a beautiful shine, and her dress was both covering and revealing at the same time. That woman knew how to dress in style.

On the right side, his two sweet daughters sat next to one another. Ruby was closest to him, with Yang on her right. Both looked across the table suspiciously at his girlfriend. He understood why, even if he didn't like it.

With Raven back in the picture, Yang undoubtedly wanted her biological mother and father to get back together. She wanted them to become a family once more. And while Raven and Ruby had no blood connection, Raven was the sister of Qrow. And Ruby adored Qrow. So therefore it stood to reason that if Raven and Tai got back together, Qrow would have a bigger role in all their lives.

However with Cinder in his life now, all of those hopes and dreams were going to be dashed. It was a sad thing, but Tai could not control what his heart felt. He loved Cinder, and Cinder loved him. Raven was still welcome in his life for the sake of his girls, but not as a lover like she had once been. They would all simply have to learn to accept it.

And then there was Raven, sitting across from him on the other end of the table. Her murderous glare was focused on Cinder, but with her mask on he wasn't sure if his girlfriend was even aware of it. Oh well. Maybe it was better that way.

The growling form of Zwei could be heard from below the table, and it looked as though he was trying to gnaw on one of Cinder's legs. He didn't understand what Zwei's problem with his new girlfriend was. Perhaps it would just take some getting used to. He was a very protective and territorial dog, after all.

And yet, despite all the awkwardness, despite all the arguing, Tai was happy. For the first time in years, he was truly happy. Not only were he and Raven on speaking terms again. Not only were his precious baby girls home once more. He had found love again. Perhaps the third time would be the charm.

Tai did not care if Cinder was missing an eye. Or if her face was scarred. Or if she did have a creepy Grimm arm. Beggars could not be choosers. The fact that this woman loved him, and that she had already survived two close encounters with death, was all that mattered to him. She would not abandon him like the others had. She was clearly too strong, or too important to die.

He sighed happily. All of his girls were here together in one place. Under one roof. All sitting down at the table to enjoy a meal together.

What more could a man want?

Author's Note: RWBY Chibi has given us the gift of the greatest ship in the fandom: Tinder. Taiyang and Cinder.

Once again, this little bit of crack was written on a whim. I hope you all enjoyed it.