Fourteen.

Whoa. Wait a minute. What?

Before I had a chance to realize what was happening, Elle retreated from me, her cheeks burning and her facial expression radiating guilt and regret. I looked at her, blinking in shock, unable to form coherent thoughts or even a straight sentence. Had she really just ... kissed me? Out of the blue, without any advance warning. All I could deduct from that was that she must have had the urge to kiss me again and that comforted me. I just stared at her and I may have looked at her shocked and confused, I had no idea, I was lost.

'Oh God!' she babbled hastily and stepped back a little bit, her cheeks blushing even deeper and her eyes dark,' I'm so sorry. It's just - I mean, I just - Oh man, I-'

Without even thinking twice, I took the one strode toward her and shut her babbling up quite effectively by pressing my mouth onto hers and claiming her. She was mine. I needed her, I needed to kiss her, needed to touch her, needed to feel her. Any last resistance or the shock about her spontaneous action before left her body and she melted into my body and pressed herself against me. Her arms curled around my neck and caressed my hair. She kissed me back and I let my hands wander down her back and played with her hair, just as I had imagined before. In the car. During some sleepless nights. I craved her, needed her, and now I had her. It felt like every inch of our bodies was touching and that excited me. She excited me. My breathing got faster as I caressed her lower lip with my tongue and I fought back a moan as well as I could. I didn't want to overwhelm her with what my body was ... um ... expressing. I put my hands on her hips and lifted her onto the kitchen counter so that her legs were either side of me. This made it a lot easier to kiss her, access all the delicate parts of her...

I moved on to caress and kiss the creamy skin on her neck and placed little butterfly kissed just on the nape of the neck when Elle suddenly jerked back to reality, it seemed.

'Noah, we-we can't do this,' she said, breathlessly. She was shaking and I didn't know if it was from the passionate makeout session or because she was shocked and disgusted at what we had just done.

I sighed, stepped back and ran my fingers through my hair. What now?

I looked her in the eyes and I hoped she could read my despair in it. Why had she interrupted our kiss? Had I done something wrong?

'I-I'm not going to just be another girl you sleep with and don't call back in the morning,' she hurried to say and stuck her chin out, 'I'm not risking my friendship with Lee just for that.'

I looked at her for a long moment. Ah. I had suspected that there were major misconceptions going on.

'That's what you think I'd do, really?' To be honest, I was insulted. Did she really think I would treat her this cheaply?

'W-well...' she trailed off and I could tell she wasn't so sure all of the sudden.

I came closer so that the distance between us shrunk to merely a couple of inches. I could feel her breath on me and I was sure she felt mine, too. She was still sitting on the counter and our height difference did not matter in this position. She could have retreated a little bit, though, but she didn't. Instead, she licked her lips nervously and waited for me to continue talking.

'Let's get one thing straight here,' I said, my voice quiet but firm. I wanted her to believe me, I needed her to believe me. 'Two things. First off: Do you have any idea how myna girls I'll kiss at a party who - on the next day - claim they've slept with me? And second: Despite what all those girls think, they never actually wanna date me. They say they do but genuinely think about it, Elle. Who wants a boyfriend, who wants a serious relationship with someone who has a reputation for getting into fights, or ... just a fling?'

I could tell she knew I was serious. Good.

'You see my point, right?' I asked her, needing to make sure she did.

She nodded, 'Yeah, but-but you'd never do something to a girl. You're not like that.'

'Yes, but that doesn't seem to factor into it for them.' I said matter-of-factly.

'So hang on,' Elle interrupted me, 'what are you trying to say here? It's not your fault you're a player? Or - at least - that you've got a reputation as one?'

'Right.'

'And...?' Elle prompted me to continue. I bit my lip which did not go unnoticed by Elle. The topic made me nervous, hell, she made me nervous. How was I supposed to explain something to her that even I didn't fully understand?

'I just mean,' I slowly said, looking down at the counter instead of directly at her since that made it much easier for me, 'I just mean that I wouldn't treat you like dirt, as you seem to think I would!'

'I still don't know what you're trying to say, Noah,' Elle said, practically asking for clarification.

'I don't either,' I simply said and it was the truth. I rubbed my hands over my face, partly to hide from her expectant glances. I chuckled at the thought that I had to hide from Elle Evans. 'But ...' I once again inched closer toward her with just an inch of air between us. I rested my hands on her thighs and I could not help but notice that her breathing had gotten shallow the second we made contact that way.

'But?' she asked with her eyes.

'... I do know I want to kiss you again,' I admitted.

Elle looked at me, taken aback, her eyes widened in shock. I was pretty sure she had wondered if I had been serious about the kiss and this potentially being more. There, I had just confirmed I wanted her. What else did she need? I tested my waters by slowly lowering my head toward her, giving her all the time in the world to stop me. I would have stopped if she wanted me to, clear as day, I respected whatever decision she was willing to make. She didn't resist, she didn't flinch, she didn't withdraw and she let me kiss her again, our lips meeting in yet another passionate, deep kiss.+

I wrapped her legs around my waist, she put her arms around my neck and caressed my upper back, toying with the hair at the nape of my neck. I loved her touch, how thoroughly she was exploring with everything being so new for her ... and for us. I just didn't want to stop ... this, whatever this was, I needed it to last forever. I lifted her off the counter and carried her out of the kitchen. I had no idea how I made it up the stairs and into my bedroom with her kissing me back with full force. The kissing had turned even more heated and I was sure that by now she could sense how much that ... well. You know? Affected me.

I dropped her onto my soft and springy mattress and that was when she regained control of herself.

'Noah,' she said, trying to pull away,' Noah...'

'Yeah,' I murmured, nibbling on her right earlobe.

'We can't, I'm not...' she hastily said.

'Hmm?' I drew back to be able to look her in the eye. Right. I had been her first kiss. This was a whole lot of firsts in a day. Gotcha!

'Oh no, I didn't mean for ... you know ... I wasn't ...' I said, my voice trailing off. I didn't want to force her into anything she didn't want.

'I ... - I can't do this,' she stammered and wriggled away, away from my embrace and stood up. She made her way to the bedroom door that I had clumsily closed after entering with her. She quickly straightened her top which had moved slightly upward. Her sudden urge to be decent after the intimate moments we had shared earlier ... I felt a pang of insult but I didn't regret any of it. I wanted her, and I could tell she wanted me, too.

I pulled her back, my hand on her arm. I quietly closed the door which hadn't been closed properly while entering hastily. I pressed my body right against her, desperate for contact.

'Noah,' she said firmly, 'I'm not going to do this. Nothing is going to happen between us because we just don't go together. All we do is argue. You scare guys away from me. And I am not some ... - some plaything you can just use when it's convenient. You got that?'

I sighed softly. She didn't understand my motivation, at all.

'I never thought you were something to use when it's convenient,' I said and it was the truth. She was special in so many ways. I looked her full in the eyes to make sure she knew I was genuine.

She groaned in frustration, 'You're not making this any easier. I don't know what the hell to do ...'

Oh, good! That made two of us!

'We argue and you're Lee's big brother but ...'

'But?'

She blurted out, ' ... but I felt something when we kissed. I don't know what the hell to do, honestly, I don't - but I am not going to make out with you if we're just hooking up.'

'You want the truth then, Elle?' I said, unable to hide my frustration for much longer. It was time to really tell her what made her special for me. 'You're the one girl who is herself around me, and I like that. But the fact that you don't want me back is sending me crazy. You're the only girl who didn't fall at my feet and it is driving me insane. I haven't so much as looked at anyone else because of you - did you know that? You're all I can think about.'

There. Cards were on the table. I wasn't the most open person on this planet so this confession was a huge deal for me. I knew Elle knew that, too.

'And ...' she asked cautiously, 'how long have you felt like this? You know, just out of curiosity.'

I shrugged. Couldn't hurt to tell her the truth, could it? 'A couple of months.'

She nodded and I was certain she was doing her utmost to keep things together, to be steady and collected.

'I thought you said you saw me as a little sister.' Elle added.

'That was until you grew up,' I said simply. Then I added something important, 'I made you blush. That been my first indicator that she may as well be into me.

'If that's true, why did you tell me I was like a sister to you?' Elle asked and I had to give her that she was asking the important questions.

I averted her eyes when I answered that one, 'You didn't want me back. I'm not the kind of guy to tell someone what I am actually feeling,' I paused for a bit, the confession strenuous for me. 'You know that. You know this whole conversation is torture to me?'

She smirked but blushed right after, 'I wanted you, believe me.'

Oh! That was what the blush was for. I grinned. Good. I felt the weight of a thousand heavy boulders fall off of me. Did she have any idea how happy this confession of hers made me? I tilted my head so that my lips brushed against hers, ever so lightly. 'Just ... I don't ... I don't want you to think that I'm only interested in one thing here, okay? I'm not. That's one of the things that I like about you. You're sweet and innocent. Different. It's cute.'

'You think I am cute now, too?' she raised an eyebrow and I was sure she must have felt my smirk against her lips. 'And here was I thinking I was just your little brother
s annoying best friend.'

'Well, there is that, too,' I retorted, still smiling.

She giggled and traced one finger across my chest, an action that sent goosebumps all over my body. I felt like I needed to emphasize something, 'I'm not just interested in you for that, okay?'

'If you were, I'd seriously question your judgement,' she mumbled and that made me chuckle. I placed a finger under her chin and tilted her head up. I hoped that she could read my expression correctly, all the caution, sincerity and care .. I needed her to understand that I was 100% serious about her. No doubt on my mind. She leaned up to kiss me and it so happened we clashed teeth. I chucked when I saw her biting the inside of her cheek in apparent horror.

'Sorry,' she muttered.

I suppressed all the chuckles that were bubbling up in my body but could not help it too much. I moved my lips over hers, carefully placing little kisses in each corner of her mouth before I answered,' Practice makes perfect.'

This time we didn't clash teeth. This time we made out in full force. I loved every second of it. I was glad that my feelings were mutually shared and that we cleared things up between us. The entire thing was complicated enough with me, her, ... Lee. We would figure this out eventually.