It was impossible to be more dead on the inside then Weiss Schnee was at this very moment. That wasn't an exaggeration even thought she wish it was. She slowly put her hands in her face and tried not to cry.
Ruby Rose smiled innocently. "Uh… surprise".
Weiss looked up and gave Ruby a glare that would have turned Medusa into stone. Ruby gulped and tried to search for the right words to say. "We tried to bake you a cake, I was in charge of the ingredients, and Blake was in charge of the decorations and Yang was in charge of baking. I don't know why I agreed to that because I'm better at baking then she is-".
"Ahem". Yang said.
"I was just joking, sis".
"Mmmhmm".
"Anyway", Ruby continued, "Everything went bad an that's why there's cake all over the walls".
At that exact moment, a glob of cake fell from the ceiling and hit Weiss on the back of the head, snapping her out of her trance. "Explain what happened, right now".
Ruby shuddered. "Well…"
-Earlier that morning-
BLAKE
Blake was at the children's library down the road, reading a book for the children. "Look," She read out loud. "I didn't wanna be a half-blood-". Before she could continue, her scroll rang. "Hang on" She said to the children as she reached into her pocket and pulled out her scroll.
Ruby's face was on the screen and Blake nervously answered her call. "Hello"?
"BLAKE"!
Blake dropped her scroll in shock, she quickly caught it before it could hit the ground and held it a few inches away from her ears. "Yes, Ruby"?
"I NEED YOU TO DO ME A FAVOR"!
"What is it"?
"WEISS' BIRTHDAY IS TODAY AND WE'RE THROWING A PARTY FOR HER, SHE'S WITH TEAM JNPR AT THE COFFEE HOUSE. WE HAVE ABOUT AN HOUR BEFORE SHE PUTS JAUNE IN THE INFIRMARY…AGAIN".
"Why didn't you get team CFVY or team SSSN to do it"?
"BECAUSE TEAM JNPR WAS ALREADY GOING TO THE COFFEE HOUSE- WE ARE WASTING PRECIOUS TIME HERE, BLAKE".
"Okay, what do you need me to do"?
"PARTY DECORATIONS".
"Got it. There's a party store across from me".
Blake hung her scroll up and ran out of the library, then she ran back into the library and grabbed a random person from the library and put them in her seat. "You're in charge". Blake handed them another copy of the book she was reading and then she booked it out of the library.
YANG
"And so I said, 'It's time for some PUN-ishmeant". Yang said into the microphone electing a chorus of boo's from the audience. A hook dragged her offstage and she flipped everyone off as she left the stage.
All of a sudden, her scroll rang. She pulled it out of her pocket and answered the call.
"Yang". Came Ruby's slightly panicked voice. "Can you do me a favor? Can you come back to our dorms, I need your help with something".
"Alright. I'll be there in a second".
Yang hung up and ran over to Beacon. She ran into her team's room an was hug tackled by Ruby. "Yang" She shouted, her voice was hoarse as if she had been shouting for a long time. "Thank goodness you're here. Come back this cake, the ingredients are on the stove as well as the directions".
"Why am I baking a cake"?
"It's Weiss' birthday".
"Why aren't you doing it"?
"Because I have to stop Weiss from murdering Jaune"!
Before Yang could question Ruby any further, she bolted out the room in a flurry of rose petals.
Yang got to her feet. "Oh boy, this should be fun".
-
WEISS
Weiss wished she had her rapier.
"Excuse me miss, I know it's not funny but your perfume smells like your daddy's got money". Jaune said as he moved closer to Weiss. "You searching for an urchin who can give you ideals"?
Weiss rolled her eyes. "Jaune, you disgust me".
"Ah, so you've discussed me". Jaune said. "I'm a trust fund, baby you can trust me".
Weiss eyed the butter knife next to her. 'Seeing as I don't have myrtenaster, I guess this knife will have to do'.
Ruby burst through the doors. She zoomed next to Weiss, smiling widely.
'On second thought' Weiss thought to herself. 'Maybe this knife will help me finally embrace the sweet, sweet release of death'.
"Weiss". Ruby said cheerfully.
Weiss looked to the sky and briefly wondered why the gods would torture her like this. "What"!?
"Happy birthday".
"Thank you. Although I had wish you had said that before I left the dorm this morning".
"I said happy birthday to you this morning". Jaune said.
"Shut up".
"Fine" Jaune moved his attention from Weiss to Pyrrha, then he noticed that both Ren and Nora were missing.
"Pyrrha"?
Pyrrha turned to Jaune, a nervous smile on her face. "Yes, Jaune"?
"Where are Ren and Nora"?
"Um-".
"PLAY THAT FUNKY MUSIC WHITE BOY"! Two voices came from the stage area, Jaune looked over to the stage and saw to his horror, Ren and Nora on stage singing.
"Oh god". He went pale. Then he got up and went after them. Pyrrha followed close behind.
Weiss turned to Ruby and wished that she had Jaune awkward flirting, even that would be better then the situation that she was in.
Not that she hated Ruby or anything, She just turned into a gay mess when she was around her. Weiss blushed furiously and tried to cover her face with her hands.
"Weiss"?
"Hmm"?
Ruby wrung her hands together nervously. "I have something I need to tell you-".
Ruby's scroll rung all of a sudden. She laughed nervously before getting out of her seat. "If you'll excuse me for a moment".
-
RUBY
Ruby was getting a call from Yang. She answered the phone.
"Ruby, come back to the dorms. We have an issue".
'SON OF A-' "What is it"?
"I accidently blew up the cake".
"You. Did. WHAT"?
"I blew up the cake".
"HOW"?!
"Come back here, and I'll show you".
Ruby tried not to scream in anger. "FINE. I'LL BE THERE IN A SEC".
Ruby hung up her scroll and ran to the Beacon dorms. Little did she know that Weiss was following her.
Ruby ran into her teams room and her jaw dropped. She had imagined a huge mess, but she didn't expect the entire room to be covered in frosting.
She turned to Yang. "What did you do"!?
"I-" Yang began, before she could continue, a loud gasp cut her off from saying anything more.
Ruby turned around and saw a horrified Weiss. Weiss put her face in her hands and Ruby immediately knew that she screwed up.
Ruby smiled innocently. "Um… surprise"?
Weiss looked up and gave Ruby a glare that would have turned Medusa into stone. Ruby gulped and tried to search for the right words to say. "We tried to bake you a cake, I was in charge of the ingredients, and Blake was in charge of the decorations and Yang was in charge of baking. I don't know why I agreed to that because I'm better at baking then she is-".
"Ahem". Yang said.
"I was just joking, sis".
"Mmmhmm".
"Anyway", Ruby continued, "Everything went bad an that's why there's cake all over the walls".
At that exact moment, a glob of cake fell from the ceiling and hit Weiss on the back of the head, snapping her out of her trance. "Explain what happened, right now".
"Well…" Ruby trailed off, and then she told Weiss everything, starting from when she woke up to when she called Blake and Yang and arranged team JNPR and Weiss to go to the Coffee House to where they were now.
By the end, Ruby was the one with her face in her hands and she was trying not to cry. "I screwed up, please don't be mad".
Weiss was quiet for a moment, her face unreadable. Then her expressions softened and she walked over to Ruby. "You dolt". She said softly. "You didn't have to do that".
Ruby smiled as Weiss hugged her.
Yang slowly walked out of the room and closed the door.
Weiss and Ruby sat on Weiss' bed. They were both quiet for a moment.
"Weiss" Ruby began.
Weiss knew what Ruby was about to say before she said it. "Ruby…" She trailed off.
Ruby worked her mouth wordlessly, then she leaned forward and kissed Weiss.
Weiss was pretty sure she died seventeen thousand time during the kiss. Once it was over, she felt herself smile.
"I still have one thing to ask about the entire cake baking thing".
Ruby blinked. "What is it"?
"Where's Blake"?
-
BLAKE
She woke up in a dumpster. She reeked of catnip. "What happened"? She said to herself as she climbed out of the dumpster.
She sighed. "Schneesus Christ, I smell awful".
And then she laughed harder then she ever laughed before.
The End