this has been sitting in my documents file for so long and i kind of forgot about it until now. i guess you can consider it canon, minus all the sam and ruby leaving thing?


Can't seem to stop you from running through my mind;

Just keep it coming 'til I make you mine;

You've got that something I wanna be with, girl.

-It Girl, Jason Derulo


It should already be a hint: the way that her home had been spotlessly clean and neat even after weeks of misuse. But she had been too distracted by the absolute peace in her brain and the presence of her daughter that she just decided to overlook it to spend time with Ruby, watching old movies and tossing popcorn at one another.

Even when Reign had taken over her, she was still struggling to get out, though weakened. There was not one moment when she didn't miss her daughter. If it wasn't for Ruby's constant presence in the back of her mind, perhaps not even the Black Rock would save her.

Except now she couldn't overlook it anymore, because there was a helmet in her garage, and she hadn't touched one of those since she had Ruby. It was sleek, smooth, and light, and for the life of her, she couldn't figure out how it got there in the first place. Clicking off the lawnmower, she carried the helmet back into the kitchen, where Ruby was doing her homework.

"Ruby, whose is this?" she asked, holding up the helmet.

Her daughter barely glanced up from the despicable calculus question that she had been trying to solve for twenty minutes already. Sam offered to help, but Ruby was adamant in solving it herself, wanting to prove that she had her mother's brain in math.

"Oh, that's Alex's," Ruby nonchalantly offered, practically stabbing the calculator.

Sam almost wanted to transfer her daughter to the living room to keep her as far away from the knives as possible, but she narrowed her eyes instead, glancing at the helmet again.

"Alex? Like Alex Danvers?"

"How many Alex do you know?"

Sam rolled her eyes, throwing a teasingly displeased look at her unseeing daughter. Calculus, always ruining lives. Sam remembered those days.

"Okay, so how did Alex's helmet end up in our garage?" she prodded. Calculus could take a minute.

Ruby shrugged. "She's been helping to clean up while you were away. How do you think the house is so clean?"

She wanted to rebut, but then she thought about it and looked around her. Ruby was right. The dishes were stored away. Her cushions had been arranged neatly until she and Ruby messed them up again. The bedrooms were clean and dustless. Even the garage, she distinctly remembered the tools in her toolbox had been scattered in her last effort to fix the plumbing.

Honestly, it should already be a hint that she would have gotten if she hadn't been so distracted by her return home and seeing her daughter again.

And…Alex had a helmet. She drove a motorcycle.

Huh.


Apparently, being Reign had not only turned her into a serial murderer, but it had also turned her wobbly meat into firm, strained…things. A flex of the arm would show a bulge the size of an oval tennis ball. Shirt taken off and there would two rows of neatly stacked four-pack. When one thigh was extended fully, the mirror would reflect defined and clear cut thigh muscles.

There was comfort to be taken in that, but it also meant an almost total overhaul of her wardrobe. Oh, they still fit, no doubt, but she had already torn the sleeves off of four jackets and ripped the seams apart in the crotch of five pants. The only safe garments were her underwear – she should probably be thankful that Reign didn't care much for consuming soil when active.

Sam had just come back from a shopping trip at the mall while Ruby was still at school. Lena had given her the month off to reacclimatize to the brand new autonomy she had over her body. And she took advantage of that to fill up the backseat of her car with new clothes that would definitely fit her.

And now, her bed was piled with clothes that would be donated, but she had paused in her wardrobe cleaning duties, because there was a pair of outfit that she certainly hadn't noticed had made its way into her wardrobe until now. She didn't ever remember having purchased anything like this before. It didn't really fit the image of being a mother.

A leather jacket and a pair of slim fit dark jeans that was a little too short for her lanky legs. What?

She would have asked, except her daughter wasn't home and she was alone. She blinked at it a few times, recognizing the curves and cutting of these apparels were definitely meant for women. And there was only one person she knew who had come into her house recently.

When Ruby came home, Sam only laid the jacket and the jeans out on the coffee table, at which the girl looked and then smiled.

"Oh yeah, did I tell you about when Alex took me riding?"

Sam almost had a heart attack. She almost picked up her phone. She almost dialed her friend. She almost told her friend off for taking her daughter out on a deathtrap. But deep down, Sam knew that her daughter could take care of herself, and no one could care for her daughter more than Alex, apart from Lena. She also knew that Alex probably only took Ruby out because of her daughter's infamous pout.

Well, at least now she knew who these belonged to, but it still didn't explain why they were in her wardrobe.

"She slept over a few days when I missed my bed," Ruby explained. "I couldn't tell her that it was you I missed."

Forgetting about the jacket and the jeans, Sam shifted onto the couch and took her daughter in a tight and long hug. However, she still made a note to thank Alex sometime for taking such good care of the most important person there was to her.


"Can you give this back to Alex when you see her?" Lena asked over coffee, handing over a really ancient phone that belonged to the last decade.

Sam gawked at it for a bit. Who could blame her? She was the CFO of a company that pioneered various technological advances that perhaps not even Einstein could have predicted. And now she was looking at a phone that was generational to when she used to party to Akon and thought tank tops were cool.

"Yeah, she went over to the…mansion when you were still…you know." Lena winced and offered a sheepish smile. "I think this is supposed to just be a burner phone and she gave it to the housekeeper; forgot to take it back."

Gingerly, she took the thing, like it was infected with germs or something – not that she would know, it was ancient. As she deposited into her purse, she casted her employer with a wary look, uncertain of whether she ought to breach the subject. She didn't think she had any right, to be honest. After all, her life was barely all together – fiscal reports to catch up on, future budgetary files to draft, and a whole host of items that she didn't own but kept making their ways to her.

Probably the universe telling her something. To do something. Full disclosure would be that it had been something that had been brewing on the side since that first lollipop, slowly burgeoning with each babysitting agreement and heartfelt promises and warm concern on the other side of the glass. Sam wasn't willing to fully disclose yet, not while her plate had become so unknowingly full while she was gone.

"Why couldn't you just give it to Kara?" she asked carefully.

It had been messy. It had been a little more than messy. Might have been a hell lot of a mess that none of the bystanders knew to deal with, actually. The fallout of Kara's identity revelation had been…well, Sam wouldn't exactly call it ugly, but it certainly was weird, and none of them, on either side, knew exactly how to handle this sudden chill between the more-than-friendship-but-less-than-relationship thing that Lena and Kara had going on.

Thank god for the lingering super strength, really, or Sam wouldn't have been able to haul the trash bag full of hard liquor bottles down to the trash bin herself and dispose of them.

Alex and she had been texting each other periodically, reporting to each other about their respective charges' conditions. According to the DEO agent, Kara was in a rut, taking everything Snapper threw at her and bulldozing through five cartons of Ben & Jerry's daily without fail. And Sam reported back that Lena's version of Ben & Jerry's was taking on the load of work at both CatCo and L-Corp, occasionally ingesting one whole bottle of scotch and falling asleep on the couch in Sam's office.

They weren't doing very well. Obviously.

She almost wanted to not ask when Lena shot her a burning look, but she pushed through. Her best friend needed to hear this. "How long are you going to be angry at her?"

"I'm not –"

"If you're not, then what are you?"

Lena shot her an unnerved glare, the fact that it was unnerved had already debilitated the effect of the glare that had been infamous for once making a grown man pee down a thousand-dollar chair during an interview. Sam raised a challenging brow.

"Can we just…get back to catching up?" Lena bemoaned, clearly not wanting to talk about the blonde in question.

Brown eyes rolled, but limber tanned fingers picked up a coffee cup anyway. "Whatever you want."


Ass seated on the stool, all attention of L-Corp CFO was concentrated on the shoe rack, particularly zeroed in a particular pair of boots posited in the bottom right corner. Form-fitting and above ankle, clearly made for female's feet, and avoided dust by being in the shoe rack, Sam couldn't think of any reason why she would own one in the first place.

But that wasn't why she had been staring at the boots for the last fifteen minutes. Well, she was, but now she was staring at something else that no one else could see. An image of Alex Danvers all dressed up in the clothing articles that she had left behind in Sam's house, straddling a bike, a shining helmet tucked under her arm, that confident smirk in place.

"Mom?"

She jolted out of her…probably inappropriate thoughts and turned to her daughter. "Hey, Ruby." Oh good, her throat was dry. Okay, not really the best time for thirsty Sam to make an appearance. Come to think of it, when was the last time thirsty Sam even came out? God, must have been longer than expected, if she was already like this by an image of a woman fully clothed.

"Is it okay if I go to Judy's place? She's got this new game and wanna try it out with me." The hopeful tone that Ruby had adopted wasn't really easy to say no to, honestly. Plus, Sam really loved how excited she had gotten at the idea.

Taking her mind off the boots, the tiny doors of the shoe rack were closed firmly. Sam stood up and shot her daughter a smile. "Sure. Let me just get the keys and I'll drop you off."


This was not a good idea. There was a very huge chance that this would blow over. She should just pack it all up and drop them at Alex's place and pretend that there was nothing else going on. That would a very good idea. She could already hear Lena telling her that this was a bad idea, ever so rational and polite.

But Sam also couldn't help it, thinking about the progression of their friendship since her daughter's collision with the agent at the statue reveal event. The looks that had gone from friendly and kind to something that reminded Sam of desire and interest. The promises that had been kept through sheer effort and directed stubbornness. The devotion for Ruby that had never been seen on anyone else before. The ever-existing concern even though they were confirmed to be out of the woods with the whole Reign debacle.

It could have been that Sam was fooling herself because of her own stupid heart, but her guts told her that there was something more. All of those meant more than just a simple friendship. And being Reign was not without its perks, one of them being that her courage seemed to have taken a huge leap – maybe it wasn't a perk, considering the doubts she was having.

She flipped her phone in her hand one more time, closing her eyes and tilting her head upwards, took a deep breath, and decided to screw it. Never say never, or something like that. Dear god, Ruby's Justin Bieber obsession in her younger days still hadn't left Sam alone.

Phone unlocked, the camera was directed on the biker belongings arranged neatly on her carpeted floor. She took a few steps forward and lifted her phone a little to get a better angle. And…snap. She deliberated the product for a bit. Once she was sure that it was good enough, a forefinger then tapped onto the message thread between her and Alex, and before she could regret it, she sent it.

Sam (7:09p.m.): Sometimes, I wonder how you still have clothes.

When the text offered a delivered status, she quickly pocketed her phone, palms already sweating. She quickly gathered up all the clothing, packing the soft articles into a bag and putting out near the shoe rack with the helmet.

And then she went about doing her chores, for once grateful that Ruby wasn't there to distract her. Not that it really mattered, because as she did the laundry, washed the dishes, cleaned Ruby's room, cleaned her room, arranged the paperwork scattered in the study, dealt with the messy blankets and throws in the living room, her phone was burning into her ass, reminding her of its static state, neither messages nor calls coming through.

About an hour later, with the laundry spinning in the dryer, she collapsed on the couch, messing it up again by dragging the throw over the back onto her lap. She fished out her phone, totally not glaring at the fact that it hadn't buzzed at all over the past hour. She was too scared to check if the text had actually been read, because her daughter had taught her about 'ghosting' and the implications of it, and she found that she hated it as much as the next Millennial.

"Enough," she muttered to herself and proceeded to toss the device unceremoniously on the coffee table, reaching for the remote control and turning to Netflix.

She hadn't had time to catch up to anything, not even after she had woken up completely herself and all rid of a genocidal Kryptonian alternate personality. Wasn't easy being a CFO of a multibillion dollar company and a single mother at the same time, while also recuperating from her body being used by an uncaring alien. Might as well use this opportunity now.

She was two episodes into the new Jessica Jones season when her phone finally buzzed, lighting up the otherwise dim room. If asked, she would deny left and right that she jumped on the couch and threw the throw away in favor of the phone. Nope, she was calm and all sorts of grace when she picked it up and saw Alex's name.

Alex (9:32p.m.): I was wondering where they'd gone to! Can I come pick it up? Like now? P.S. Don't worry, I'm very comfortable in my underwear

Sam blinked. Was that – a winky face could mean anything. Playful, frisky, friendly, flirty.

She didn't really know what she had expected, but it certainly wasn't this. This was what she wanted – kind of, she didn't really even know what she had wanted when she sent the text off – but it wasn't what she expected.

Sam (9:36p.m.): Sure. Bring booze if you want. It's just me and Jessica Jones tonight.

Alex (9:36p.m.): Whiskey or whiskey?

She smiled. Alex Danvers' effect, been an enigma since the first time the redhead had made her smile like this, but maybe it wasn't so much an enigma now.

Sam (9:36p.m.): Surprise me.


The living room flooded with a single high beamed light, accompanied by a whirring sound that had been so familiar in her past before she had Ruby.

The first time she saw the helmet, the skin of her palms almost felt as if it was gripping the rubbery and patterned texture of the handlebars, meant to keep a rider's hand from slipping and allow firmer twists. The first time she saw the jacket and the jeans, it almost felt like her own body was engulfed in the snug fit of those articles, warm and stretchable, cool and attractive. The first time she saw the phone, she almost laughed at the memory of once upon a time snugging an age old cell phone up the side of the helmet to reach her ear, an improvised headset. The first time she saw the shoes, well, everything was out of the window because Alex Danvers in those things really did things to her.

Instead of turning off, she found the living room still flooded with its light on high beam, causing to have to squint at the window as the running motor kept on. Moments later, three solid knocks landed on the front door. She blinked, groaning as she slipped out from under the throw and made her way towards the door.

When the door opened to reveal Alex Danvers, she supposed she should be lucky that there was more composure in her than expected as she didn't melt as soon as she saw the woman. Instead, she asked, "How many of those do you have?" Her voice was loud enough to overpower the noises the bike was still making.

"Enough that I forgot I've been missing a whole set," Alex said with a grimace. "Should probably plan for a closet overhaul."

"Oh no," Sam said before she could think. Alex raised her brow, the edge of her lips twitching. "I mean, you look good. Why change? Right?" she added belatedly, keeping from slapping herself. "Are you just gonna let your bike run out of battery or something?"

"You know battery?"

"I'm a single mom."

"Good point. And no, I figured since you're alone and I'm alone, we could go out for supper, instead of huddling in and being pitiful. What do you say?" Like it was incentive, the redhead's hand appeared from behind her back to shake a bottle of Jack Daniels in the air.

"It's almost ten."

"And?"

"You're so lucky you don't have children." She almost regretted saying it, knowing it was the reason behind Alex and Maggie's breakup.

Except Alex's grin remained, and she narrowed one eye with a cock of her head. "That's not a no."

Sam glanced over the woman's shoulder at the running bike, all majestic and shining, signs that Alex had taken really good care of it. Giving a helpless look to the redhead, she said, "You're also lucky that Ruby decided Judy's Xbox is more interesting than a night of Netflix with me." As she turned around to go up the stairs to change, Alex remained at the door.

"What? Preposterous. I'll give that young lady a nice talking to!" Alex bemoaned, feigning more than necessary offense for Sam.

Sam entered her room with a smile on her face, fighting a snort and grateful that Alex couldn't see her. She quickly changed into something comfortable enough for a bike ride. She was just tucking her arms into her jacket sleeves as she made her way back down the stairs, relishing in the sight of the redhead lounging against the door pane with her hands tucked into her pockets.

Honestly, the woman was a little too much sometimes. Before the door was locked behind them, Sam remembered to grab the bag that contained Alex's stuff.

"You can wear it for now," Alex said, waving at the helmet extended in her direction.

Sam shrugged and tucked it under her arm, following the DEO agent to the bike. As they neared the vehicle, her eyes took in the muscle piece, gloried in its bulk and obvious horsepower – something that Sam wouldn't have associated with Alex had she not seen the woman in action. She couldn't help but reach out to touch the leather seat, almost moaning at the feel of it under her skin.

"I haven't been on one of these in so long," she complained.

Alex quirked her brows, pausing in her movements to put on her own helmet. "You know how to ride one?"

"I was…pretty wild back in high school," she offered, followed by nothing else.

They locked gazes for a few moments, and Sam thought she saw that hint of something in Alex's eyes again. The shadowed desire, darkened irises, turning those brown eyes close to complete blackness. Alex's jaw went at work for a bit as she glanced down at her bike and back up at Sam.

Seemingly having made a decision, she took a step back and motioned towards the thing. "Wanna take it for a spin?"

Sam's eyes widened. "Um…I don't – I might be a little rusty," she stuttered. A huge part of her really wanted to do it. To remember how it felt to be straddling this powerful vehicle. To reminisce the control that it offered her.

Alex shrugged. "I'll be here. Don't worry. I'm sure you won't damage it too much," she added with a teasing smirk. "Go on. Plus, who can miss out on watching a goody mommy such as you ride an actual motorcycle?"

"Your funeral."

They switched places and Sam put the helmet on, making sure the straps were tight and that she could see clearly through the shield. Easily catching the key that Alex tossed at her, she straddled the bike. And oh god, she couldn't believe how much she had missed this.

She also had to try really hard to not be distracted by Alex's presence at her back, encompassing and warm, but no one had to know that.


"I told you Audrey's tough."

"You named it Audrey?"

Alex shot her what would have been scathing look if not for the grin on her face. "Hey, it's a strong name," she defended. Sam snorted and picked up another fry from the stock they had picked up at McDonald's on their way to the hillside. "You were pretty good out there."

Shrugging, Sam absentmindedly chewed on the fry, not really tasting the salt and potato flavor. She didn't bother to provide a response, but she could practically feel the burn of Alex's curious stare at the side of her head.

"Okay, so exactly how wild were you back in the day?" Knew it. As a government agent, be it covert or overt, Alex Danvers would always be curious. It was one of the things Sam liked about her. "Like on a scale of one to ten, how would you rate it?"

Sam laughed, shaking her head and chancing a glance at the redhead. "A definite twenty."

"No."

"Definitely. How did you think I ended up pregnant with Ruby in the first place?"

"She's a sweetheart."

Sam hummed in agreement. If there was anyone around, they would have noticed the way Sam and Alex's hands were practically touching on the mat they were sitting on, something Alex had just brandished from under the seat when they reached the hillside. A minute movement and one pinkie would be on top of another.

At this moment, she couldn't be more grateful that Lena had asked her to come to National City. At first, she had only agreed because she was tired of being in Metropolis and Ruby seemed to getting worse and worse at the school she was in, though the girl refused to tell Sam anything. But then she came, she worked, she met Kara and Alex and everyone else, she found out she was actually an alien with super strength, and she didn't think she had ever been happier.

A lot of that could be contributed to the new friends she had gained in this spur of the moment decision, yet she knew it was mainly because of the woman next to her and her daughter. Yes, Lena was her best friend and Kara was like sunlight ensconced in a single body. Alex, though, was just…something else. For the first time in a long time, she felt like someone really understood her without her having to really explain it, lollipops and all that.

"Thank you."

Alex made a noise of surprise, looking at her in askance.

Sam swallowed and lost the mischievous smile. In its place was an emotional one, thankful and happy. "For not doubting me. For helping me even though I was at my worst – or Reign was, I guess. For giving me a second chance with my daughter. For taking care of Ruby. For loving Ruby as much as you do. Thank you."

The next few seconds were spent staring at one another, as if one was trying to decipher the other. Even though, really, out of everyone, they could decipher each other probably the easiest. And then the miniscule distance between them was eliminated with Alex reaching out and wholeheartedly grasping her hand, pulling it to her lap and stroking the skin almost absentmindedly.

Alex looked away and out at the city sprawled before them, but Sam could see by the way her eyes roved that she wasn't really paying attention. It was like the woman was trying to find words, find clarity, find something in the view. The hand holding hers was still holding hers, fingers running over her skin like second nature.

Then Alex sucked in a deep breath with an audible swallow, shoulders stiffening and the grip on Sam's hand tightening. When she turned to Sam, the look in her eyes said everything. "If I tell you I like you, what will happen?" Sam inhaled deeply herself, somehow unable to believe that this was happening. "Not just as a friend. More than that. Like I wanna hold your hand like you. Like I wanna go to your place and make dinner for you and Ruby like you. Like I wanna kiss you like you," the redhead clarified. "What will happen?"

The taller woman deliberated the look on Alex's face, all kinds of sincere and honest and afraid. And Sam laughed a little. Truly, Reign would always be a blemish in her life, but she really did play a part in that bolster of courage that Sam found. This time, she reached out to cup their clasped hands with her free one, eliminating the space between them entirely so that they were really side by side.

"If you tell me you like me," she whispered, making a minute glance at frowning lips before returning to brown eyes, "in all those ways, I'll ask you what you're waiting for."

Alex was quiet for a moment, and then she heaved a disbelieving laugh, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. Sam believed those were happy tears, because her own eyes were doing the same thing.

"I don't know," Alex whispered.

Rolling her eyes, Sam did the only thing she could, which was to take initiative and lean forward to capture those lips she had been subconsciously obsessed with since that time with the lollipop. Salt and barbeque sauce flooded her taste buds, but there was something else – something she didn't even know existed.

Contentment.


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